How naïve was I?
To think that I could cease bleeding-
Bleeding into words like it healed me somehow.

How I thought the warmth of love would stitch the pieces of my heart,
And my heart would stop bleeding sad poetry like it used to.
But it did.
It stopped long enough,
False promising a forever.

But how naïve was I?
To think that I could go much far from home-
Far from the comforting grasp of my anguish tearing into black inks of beautiful despair.

it was so vivid to me
the way you're not letting me go
the way you pull me closer
the way you look for me
the way you come for me
sometimes i feel
is it just yesterday
sweet warmth was once shared
that fall on the bed
that hug when cold
it was my 30th
it was you right
i might be mistaken
this is just a vivid memory
as they say
it was
sorry that i lied
i did like you from the start

xoxo

Have you seen me there
walking the halls filled with blue skies
and star showers
through waves of passing moments
holding your hand in mine
mimicking your smile?

Have you seen me
in the future we will live in
rushing past you
toward places that don't exist yet
in our shared conscience?

Have you seen us
meeting by chance
at a bar late at night
asking for a lighter
then looking up
to see your own eyes reflected
while easy smiles stumble in shock
and recognition?

Do I still exist
somewhere in you?

In the dance of fate, our paths did cross,
Two souls entwined, neither at a loss.
In every glance, a world did unfold,
A tale of love, forever to be told.

In your eyes, I see the stars so bright,
Guiding me through the darkest night.
In your smile, the sun's warm embrace,
Lighting up my world, a radiant space.

Hand in hand, we walk this earth,
Our love a testament to its worth.
Bound by destiny, a cosmic plan,
Two hearts united, as one we stand.

Through the storms, we find our way,
Love's compass leading, come what may.
In every challenge, we find a way through,
For together, there's nothing we can't do.

In this journey, together we'll remain,
Two souls forever, love's sweet refrain.
Destined to be, forever and a day,
In each other's arms, forever to stay.

You find me.
In the church bells of a Hozier song,
the sheets that without you feel wrong,
you bind me.
.
You remind me,
of our sunny morning walks,
of our silly grinning talks,
when you find me.
.
You touch every thought,
my eternal leitmotif;
no such battle fought
as with you, my heart-thief.
.
And I want to write words,
tell you how strongly I yearn,
but my mind sees absurds:
so each letter I burn.
.
And I'm terrified, paralyzed with fear;
I dread your heart will cool,
that you won't love me, my dear -
that I've been but a fool.
.
Chasing dreams, all in vain,
as I wonder who warms your bed;
So far away, across the pain,
racing terrors in my head.
.
An ocean between us, worlds apart,
I crave desperately for your embrace.
Yet still I'm silent, intrepid heart -
a grave of sorrow, sans your grace.
.

To much thought, she really makes me to think
To much dream, she really makes me to dream
And oh! this feeling is quite such a drink
Which makes to sail without a boat on stream

Beyond the clouds and beyond the deep vales
I really have been, really, I have seen
Yet I never knew such a girl did dwell
Upon this lofty height. Oh! such serene

My wondering eyes couldn’t behold her beauty
And my senses are numb, perplex and senseless
And I guess to love her was my duty
In this world where love and magic are less

She was more beautiful than a poet’s rhyme
More dangerous than a criminal’s crime

Fight against time, I try to remember;
it slips away like fragments of a dream;
our every moment - a winter ember -
fades as I silently scream.
.
And sweet oblivion doesn't follow:
it leaves me feeling empty and cold;
Without those memories I am hollow,
need them to warm what's left of my soul.
.
I cling desperately to pieces and bits:
each shared laugh and each kiss,
and then even harder the truth hits:
you're gone and I'm alone in the abyss.
.
I stare at our photo for far too long,
wonder if I could have done more;
I hear you in every love song,
still need you in my very core.
.
I bought a perfume just like yours -
pathetic, I know, but it helps me sleep -
I hold your hoodie like a protective force,
to feel like somehow a piece of you I keep.
.
And I need you to know I want you to live,
to be as happy as you can be;
I wish you the best life can give,
even if it's without me.
.

As the snowy days grow colder,
I'm in the trenches, like a soldier:
a war against my own heart.
.
Shrapnel, bullets, drying blood
surround me in the mud
since we've been apart.
.
My enemy knows no reason,
cares not for negotiation;
moving on for it is treason;
accepts no explanation.
.
And I keep fighting through the pain,
survival instincts wax and wane,
But in my chest I keep a hope.
.
Weak and battered, yet alight,
a single candle in the night -
the only thing that helps me cope.
.
I let the embers of it seethe,
grip it tight and grit my teeth,
like a drowning man to a rope.
.
It whispers softly: "he'll return",
that flame doesn't cease to burn,
its heat is my heliotrope.
.

Even when the gray
Overtakes the day,
Even when the cold gives me chills,
The thought of your embrace
Puts a smile on my face,
Fond and soft - fog over hills.
.
You are my warmth in the night,
My antidote to frostbite
When life weighs me down.
With you I feel safe, finally at peace;
I pray for the feeling never to cease:
Royal bliss, no need for a crown.
.
And days will keep flowing,
Like waves that we're rowing,
But we'll pull through the storm.
Whatever life throws our way,
We have our quiet bay,
Just you and I, snuggled up, warm.
.

And thus she went
Leaving behind her the many kind words
And lingering hopes that make all good things seamless,
But which fade like her perfume in places she slept.

When I saw her face disappear
Behind mirroring train reflections
I saw those who stared when we waved
Caught in the crossfire of our connection.

They should know, as all should, how
Our iron-clad love is feather armour
Marking a true knight of the cloth
The world's spasms worn about our backs with many gold brooches.

Such it is to be anointed, to filter all out
With your inestimable standards
Held high for those to see
How much she loves me.