Yes, it's male Sundayitis,
AKA masculine vaginitis,
So, it's footy Sunday again,
Your great god Baal of sin,
Ever tried to lighten up?
A smile on your face of life's cup,
No, wake up negative!
Lucky for you I am so positive!
Men, **** yourselves on the front grass,
I've mopped the floors, that'll last,
Always keep on smiling,  I say,
For once, you too  have a delightful day!

This is a symbol,
Of life's gamble,
Our eternal optimism,
Symbolic  of symbolism,
The sun arose anyway,
My wish for you today,
For now and always,
"May all your troubles be little ones,"
Smiles on dials, make your own fun!

This is a poem for hype,
Are you an outdoorsy type?
We'll get drunk on the patio,
That's outdoorsy--way to go!

My email is on Thunderbird, you know,
But now it's Thunderbird a'Go-Go,
It'll go right into the ******* tip,
With my boot up its blip!
Technology so dysfunctional for an old bird,
That's why from me you haven't heard,
Hope this poetry site works,
Technology can be so perverse!

Happy New Year's Eve, fireworks and grog,
A night of terror for cats and dogs,
Up the creek without a paddle,
Dogs running away, quite addled,
A night of terror for cats and dogs,
Happy New Year! Fireworks and grog.....

A burning fire, intense,
Loving you is my intent,
Still a magic of intensity,
A laugh, and chemistry,
We love to finish our days,
In burning, intense love haze......

What makes the world a better place?
Okay, healing hands of grace,
And people with a smiling face,
Maybe, if you want to go that way,
A humble community of Faith,
A simple life, no extras today,
A helping hand along the way,
A life of harmony and grace,
"No hard feelings" and walk away,
Each one of us today,
Can make our world a better place!

The café named a sandwich after me,
"World's greatest doormat", prithee,
A people-pleasing syncophant, you see,
So, here's the new sandwich for thee,
"The world's greatest doormat", just like me!

Beware, ambition!
So-called politicians,
Have you got enough super yet?
You'll never get poverty, by heck!
What are you doing today?
Like job creation, let's say?
Beware, ambition,
So-called politicians,
We all get to  vote,
We'll cast aside your yoke,
Beware, ambition,
And fear oppressions,
So-called politicians.....

This is an ode about boys,
Of any age, we're the toys,
The meat market boys make,
They're all a mad as snakes!

Long ago, way back when,
I was teaching five year olds then,
The funniest things happen to me,
One day I had different coloured shoes, you see,
One brown, one blue, gross, prithee,
Preps said very loudly to me,
"You're the silliest teacher we've ever seen."
So much for teaching them literacy,
The joke was on me, quite definitely,
Still, I guess I can survive anything,
It's called my worst day of teaching.......

I touch your skin,
It keeps your insides in,
I touch your face,
Your smile of grace,
A touch of love,
Your blessing as a dove,
I touch your hand,
You're a pearl of a man,
You touch my heart,
I hope we never part,
The power of touch,
Can we ever love enough?

I wrote an ode like a song,
About a town called Poowong,
I wrote it in a song,
Then I went to Geelong,
I had egg fong in Poowong,
I knew a sheila in Geelong!

I can close my eyes and see you again,
Drifting aboard a dream catcher's train,
Even if I never see you again,
You still weave the dreams in my brain,
Oh, dream catcher,
Can we make it through the night?
I still glimpse you in the morning light,
Across realms of fantasy,
Are  you the dream catcher for me......

What is a genuine love?
Is it the boy-girl stuff?
Or love in a divine glove?
Like blessings from above,
Or blessings all around,
From Heaven to the ground,
So, is this genuine love?
Love in a divine glove.......

Forest therapy,
Lovers embrace trees to breathe,
Symbiosis please!

A strong smell memory,
What do lilacs smell like to me?
It's like a childhood prompt,
of a garden long gone,
Sweet fragrances divine,
Lilacs in old gardens, time
passed, scent memory,
What do lilacs smell like to me?

This is a little everyday tale,
A warning for women, without fail,
Yes, it's Easter time again,
Your old man's got camping on his brain,
So, you load up the caravan and car,
This camping site is miles too far,
You set off in a golden glow,
Seven hours of traffic jams on the road,
You are having fun! you grin,
You are listening to your family whinge,
Your old man has a bad back,
You unload the stuff, the kids do clap,
But, the primus stove does not work,
Then the fridge throws a spanner in the works,
Now the milk is off,
Your old man tells you to "*******!"
You are having fun!
Shame you haven't got a gun!
You all collapse into bed,
By 5 am, it's raining, enough said,
The dog has left you a doggy surprise,
And for breakfast, only frozen pies,
You are having fun!
His moans have just begun.
You wish you'd brought a gun!
Yes, girls, camping is a defence,
God gave you a home, not tents!
Happy Holidays!!!!!!!!**######

I gaze at every human face,
We have all been touched by grace,
How do you use your abilities,
To max out your capabilities?
If we all smiled with our human face,
The world would be a better place,
So we'd all be touched by grace.

Here in parochial Melbourne town,
Football causes many a frown,
Folk say, "Who do ya barrack for?"
I think, "What do ya wanna know for?"
Then I say, "Right back at ya!
I barrack for Jesus and Mahatma!!"
Yes, let's barrack for our princes of Peace,
In our hearts, their .dear  souls to keep,
It might make our world a better place,
If we  all had a serene smiling face,
To barrack for Jesus and Mahatma,
"There you go, right back at ya!"

It's romance versus the future, chicks,
What sort of guy makes you click?
Is he a loveable kind of dude?
What makes him think he's right for you?
And what do you think about him?
Is it all about that wedding ring?
Is he really such a handsome prince?
Is it more than skin deep, thick?
It's romance versus the future, chicks,
What sort of guy makes you click?

I, Angelus, bring you Good News this day,
Joyous the world, one blessed day,
Infant King born on Christmas Day,
Now we only see the Nativity in a play,
While commercialising Christmas Day,
Good excuse for a holiday,
Celebrated in diverse ways,
Too much cant in Christmas Day?
Baby Jesus still blesses us,
As the world turns, spake I, Angelus,
Let' s worship our Infant King with giving,
Life is, indeed, for the living,
The future is for the young,
Their world has now begun,
Jesus spreads His healing love,
Let's bless our lives like peaceful doves,
I, Angelus, bring you Good News this day,
Every day National Peace and Happiness day,
We ain't dead yet, I, Angelus, does say,
From bad shall come good one day,
God blesses us on this Holy day,
This, the true meaning of Christ on Christmas Day,
I, Angelus, bring you Hope and Good News this day.

I guess I am stoic,
And tolerant, is that heroic?
Is stoicism a good trait?
Or maybe I am stubborn, okay,
No one has to believe B.S.,
So stoicism is a virtue, I guess.....

A verse from an ******* girl,
How not to save the world,
We all know the answers to this,
Industry leaders give it a miss,
The finance sector us to hector,
Is our nation to be beggars?
Division between the plebs, not grots,
Too much 'have' and 'have not',
We all know how not to save the world,
Verse to read from an ******* girl....

DIY DISASTERS!
Once upon a lifetime,
I knitted a disaster line,
My sister was expecting,
So, I thought I'd be creating,
That first ****** looked beautiful,
Second, third and fourth not so dutiful,
They turned into footy boots size,
So I bought socks in Kmart--surprise!
I never found a baby with four different feet,
For DIY disasters, booties can't be beat.......

Is true religion,
Facing extinction?
Amazing  true love,\
Brotherhood from above,
Hands across the miles,
Smiles to last a while,
Oh, that was the intention.....
Is true religion,
Facing extinction?

Let's give tribute to our vets,
Best diagnosticians yet,
Can they mend a broken wing?
Yes, and most other animal things,
The pets don't know what's wrong,
Vets say, "It won't take long,"
Animal healers are the best,
Mute animals get healing yet!

In Oz, we don't like political jokes,
Here, they all get elected, folks,
Pollies sell their souls for money,
Their salaries aren't even funny,
Then they get super to retire,
Better candidates we should hire,
Different from our oldies and veterans,
They're on measly financial plans,
Yes, that's why we don't like political jokes,
Here,  they all get elected, folks.

I guess this is a funny tale,
I still reflect, silent wail,
There I was, giving birth,
Snicker for what it's worth,
"Excuse me, sister, I'm having a contraction!"
Did that cause a nurse reaction!
They must have thought I was a dipstick,
Laughing away in their lipsticks!

It's have an opposite day,
You write, I'll draw, let's say,
Or I'll write a one act play,
Whoops! Write a verse anyway,
So much for opposites day.........

I'm passing hours, pondering ectoplasm,
Ethereal ghosts float over time's dark chasms,
I'm musing on ectoplasm, so pensive,
Would a shade of Jesus be God's missive?
Glimmer of wraiths, sight unseen,
Are they the long gone racing team?
Ectoplasm, I wonder at spirits and souls,
Angels appear in dreams, faces of old,
This side of midnight, not too far away,
Loved ones guiding us every day,
Life changing old souls, in a collective,
Maybe a shade of Jesus would be a missive,

I'm pondering ectoplasm, bemused and pensive.

Here, I dwell in no man's land,
On the flip side, there's men unwomanned,
They can be  a miserable band,
Desperately seeking a hand,
I read their profiles, for online dating,
Is this pulp fiction they are creating?
"Honest, sensuous, sincere men here,
Tactile and reliable," Great, my dears,
All searching for affection,
BUT, I want your ex's true opinion!
Can I have her phone number, please?
What do you mean she's overseas,
Like forever and permanently?
Oh, really, really, really,
What does your ex say about you, please?
Why complain about her to me?
Honestly, why are you unwomanned?
While, here I dwell in no man's land........

We never grow up in the usual way,
We fool around every day,
"Magic's still the same!" he tells me,
I do love him so devotedly,
Long hours spent entwining.
Our ageless love divining,
I write this verse so thoughtful,
I trust he stays forever faithful,
For people who never grow up,
On love, you never give up!

It was a dark and stormy day,
Cooking tea in the usual way,
This was my mother long ago,
"Don't touch the pressure cooker, no!"
Subtly, she left the scene,
Forgot the cooker, its head of steam,
Bang! Did that curry explode,
Mum's response, implode!
"Why didn't you check that stove?"
"You told me not to touch it, no!"
All I can say on this, fifty years later,
Don't use pressure to cook my curry or taters!

It was all a mystery,
Part of human history,
Was it a doorway with no door?
A portal closed for ever more,
Was it all ancient knowledge?
Forgotten in human's college,
The door to the in-between,
A closed door is all that's seen,
It was all a mystery,
Part of human history!

A perfect world would be Paradise,
Global peace, bliss more than nice,
Collective communion of one human soul,
A garden of Eden, as in days of old,
Elysian Fields would be Heaven on Earth,
True Shangri-la, for what it's worth,
Equitable Peace, one human hand,
Friendly faces, our true dream land,
A perfect world would be Paradise,
Global Peace, bliss more than nice.

Let's hear it for vaccines, my dears,
The 'anti' movement's  in full sway here,
Now there's measles in Melbourne, no cheers,
Summer epidemics, the parents' fears,
Let's hear it for vaccines, my dears!

I dream big all the time,
All humans to aim high,
Raise our expectations,
For really united nations,
Souls unleashed in our minds,
Yes, we should aim high,
Invest in the future of Earth,
A future for our young they deserve,
Make some happy memories today,
For spiritual wellbeing days,
Our minds unleashed, aim high,
I dream big all the time!

Fantasies can be futile, but fun,
Better than fixations for some,
Fantasies are great for everyone,
When company at your side there's none,
Let's fantasise,
And visualise---
Impossible dreams my brain ran,
All over some intangible man,
Must believe in the invisible,
So not really credible,
But better than fixations for some,
Fantasies can be futile, but fun.

Our Synaesthesia is for free,
Music is the muse for me,
In my blood, you see,
Images imaginary,
Elvira Madigan wakes to see,
Mozart play Mozart lucidly,
Swooner songs sound so silly,
Old rockers croon so vividly,
Funny lyrics in my brain,
Sounding a little deranged,
(It is hereditary
In my family)
Yes, Synaesthesia is for free,
Smurfette's songs, so silly.

Yes, it's Christmas, you know,
We'll all buy Easter eggs tomorrow,
Let's have a peaceful Christmas,
Easter eggs tomorrow, no fuss!
No need to commercialise, I guess,
Have a great day, no less,
Yes, it's Christmas, no woe,
We'll all buy Easter eggs tomorrow!

I scribble here, musing,
In my writer's mind, looming,
Is my muse a ghost writer?
A writer's mind has an insider,
How do your imagine your muse?
Like an ancient soul, thoughts to amuse,
Or is talent our muse?
Thoughts write themselves,
Creating lit. for bookshelves,
All a bit of a  puzzle, you see,
Musing on our muses, a mystery.......

I'll build a home of dreams,
No mansion, or so it seems,
Where  I have a temple of my own,
Peace, a muse, an introvert alone!
Not the end of the world, it seems,
One day, I'll build my home of dreams......

There is a river of life and time,
I celebrate it in this rhyme,
A vast, flowing broad waterway,
We're swept along in a tide of days,
People floating far and near,
Ships in the nights, close and dear,
Then we all sort of float in lines,
There is a river of life and times.........

Note well, all you New Year's mad hatters,
It's the future that really matters,
With all your joyous bevies and beers,
Blazing fireworks and raucous cheers,
What does really matter,
All you party hearty mad hatters?
What's our New Year's resolutions,
As we commence our anticipation?
What about peace as liberation?
Or making extinct extinction,
For all our human population,
And our animal populations?
Can we think of any new solutions,
Beyond reafforestation?
How can we end terrorism?
Which masks the real perdition--
Running the world on munitions....
Very unpopular thoughts, my dears,
One of my muse's strange ideas,
How can we create a better place,
For everyone in the human race?
So, all you New Year's mad hatters,
It's all our futures that matter.

DIY DISASTERS!
Once upon a lifetime,
I knitted a disaster line,
My sister was expecting,
So, I thought I'd be creating,
That first ****** looked beautiful,
Second, third and fourth not so dutiful,
They turned into footy boots size,
So I bought socks in Kmart--surprise!
I never found a baby with four different feet,
For DIY disasters, booties can't be beat.......

Men have great ideas in bed,
Including when they're duly wed,
Why is that, do you ask?
Plugging into a genius is the task!
The woman of the day of course,
Love is an incredible force,
Inspiration, creation,
Can lead to innovation,
Plugging into a genius is the quest,
Women can handle it the best!

Country Cups and Picnic Races,
Welcoming smiles on rustic faces,
Bush ballads in these places,
Galloping steeds and friendly faces,
A good time is had by all, eh!
Summer race day in the country,
Galloping steeds and bush hospitality!

So, a usual Melbourne summer,
We chat to anyone about the weather,
Very safe subject in Melbourne town,
Raining, then bushfires to cause a frown,
It's either stinking hot, then freezing cold,
Droughts and mists, or scorchers of old,
Four seasons in one day, to ring the changes,
Tomorrow, there'll be bushfires in the ranges,
But today, it's cold and rain,
Good drinking water down the drain,
Yes, a  usual Melbourne summer,
I even wrote a verse  about the weather......

Let's raise a bitter glass,
Football's here at last,
And that's not all,
Teams do crowds enthrall,
From a victory,
****** defeat, you see,
No flag again this year,
Bitter glass, my dears,
Football's finally a'loose,
Pour that glass of bitter juice!