Oh, bucolic pastorale,
Dawn brings a carnival,
Golden-pink, sunrise hues,
What a wonder for our view,
Dawn draws back her veil,
Night vanishes, sunlight's grail,
Our skies aflame,
End nocturnal games,
Oh, bucolic pastorale,
Dawn brings her carnival.

In our world technological,
Here's how to talk to gadgets digital,
"Now, listen up, keyboard and router,
Not to mention dysfunctional mouser...
Are you listening to me carefully?
(I am talking to them, but silently),
I do have replacements for each of thee,
I see a future ahead of you three,
Tossed into the gaping jaws of a bin,
off to the council tip, repository of sin,
Did you hear that? Listening in,
Stop trying to do my head in!"
Now they're behaving dutifully,
Technology responding beautifully,
"I'm warning each one of thee,
No more messing around with me!"
Yes, how to talk to technology!
(But make sure you do it silently!)

A long, long time ago, I can still remember when,
Junk food made me smile,
And I knew if had my chance,
That I could make my fatness dance,
And maybe I was happy for a while.

But McDonald's made me shiver,
With every burger they'd deliver,
Bad news on their doorstep,
I couldn't take one more step.

I can't remember if I cried,
When  I passed size twenty-five,
But something touched me deep inside,
The day I knocked back obesity fries,
CHORUS.
So, bye, bye McDonald's French fries,
Drove my  chevy away from McDonald's,
didn't have a bevy,
I said goodbye to whiskey and rye,
Singing no more apple pies,
That's the end of obesity fries.....

Did you  go to McDonald's biomes?
Did you know you're  changing your genomes?
Eating all those pesticides?
Now do believe they love you, guys?
Might as well eat dead flies!
And can you change evolution in real time?

Well, I know you're addicted to them,
You'll need more than treadmills in the gym,
Now can't even put on your shoes,
Man, you'll dig the obesity blues,

CHORUS.

I was an obese teenage bronco buck.
Driving to McDonald's in a pickup truck,
But I knew I was out of luck,
The day I ate landfill in those French fries...

I started singing bye, bye obesity fries,
Drove my chevy, had no bevies,
And the burgers were dry,
This is the day I knock back French fries.

CHORUS.
I met a girl who sang the blues,
She'd passed turning size twenty-two,
I asked her if she ate junk food too,
She just smiled and drove away,
I drove down to the store no more,
Where I ate additives years before,
But the junk food store didn't care anyway...

CHORUS
CHORUS....

HOT WHEELS.
I went from broke to buying a Lamborghini,
Price tag not so teeny,
Sleek and black, for my driving academy,
Or should  I buy the red Ferrari?
Command a salesman to "comprare"?
Wouldn't he be a happy chappy?
But would it make me happy?
I could be buying loads of stuff,
But when you're old, you've got enough!
To me, consumerism is in vain,
My peaceful simple life in the slow lane.
So, today I did not buy the red Ferrari,
Or indeed the sleek Lamborghini,
There was no Hot Wheels Driving School,
Consumerism as a manipulative tool.

Are all footy fanatics
Total raving lunatics?
The flag's in the bag!
We've got lively lads
The best we've ever had!
Peter Pans on ***,
The flags that time forgot!
Footy finals fever,
Talk about dream weavers!
Footy finals phobia,
TV claustrophobia,
Why didn't we win,
Any old excuse again!
Footy fanatics,
Raving lunatics,
Footy finals fever,
Melbourne's dream weavers!

Here's a verse to make you laugh!
You make me feel like an urban giraffe,
With a fabulously long neck,
What to do with that, by heck?
I see you far above the madding crowd,
Respect from afar is allowed,
I send you my feathered breath,
What do you do with that, by heck?
Did you know a giraffe can kiss?
For you, I pray nothing goes amiss,
A verse to you, sealed in bliss.....
I see you, far above the madding crowd,
Is respect from afar allowed?

Seduced by clichés of love,
We signed on for wedding doves,
Being at those wedding receptions,
All clichés of norms' conventions,
Having a cream puff wedding day,
An expensive way of getting laid,
All clichés for the bridal industry,
Trite cant, and hypocrisy,
BUT--the appliances outlived everyone!!
Wedding gifts when once were young,
On film noir weddings I ponder on,
As these golden years I wander from,
All that phony hypocrisy,
Cliches and norms of society,
D.I.V.O.R.C.E.
(Who didn't hate going to the in-laws for tea?)

Does my computer dream?
Is this puzzle what it seems?
What are a computer's dreams?
Maybe dreams exist in this machine,
The outsider in my room,
Designed to make us feel like fools,
Addictions seductive,
Hitech savvy so productive,
A puzzle, so it seems,
Does a computer ever dream?

Here is my version of a paradigm shift,
Socratic questions if you get my drift.
Why did God make the Universe elliptical?
To make an Aussie football, not spherical!
Why did God make football? See here,
To make men miserable, my dears!
Why did God make beer?
To make men happy, my dears!
So, some intelligent chappies here,
Taking beer to the football, no fears,
Now they're miserable and happy dears!

Brothers on the beach,
Seaside in reach,
The two amigos,
Blood brother bros,
Fraternals and kin,
Pals and companions,
Sidekicks and playmates,
Coastline siblings,
Buddies in the shingles,
A forever brother band,
Golden memories of the strand.

A new babe on the way,
Does she arrive today?
The stork is on standby,
Is she coming down the slide?
A star in heaven's berth,
Winging her way to Earth,
Now an atomic cluster,
Has she got a dust buster?
Her future unplanned,
Soon in Earthling's band,
When is she coming down the slide?
Right now, the stork is on standby!

WHEELS!!
Car insurance policies,
Snafu in technology,
Male methodology,
Some men are kind and comical,
Some are not so logical,
So-called men and their vehicles,
If they've got tyres and testicles!!!!!

Hands are for healing,
Alleviating, soothing,
Balms for calming,
Gently restoring,
Curative hands,
From many lands,
To salve and ease,
Free remedies,
Hands for comforting,
Hands are for healing.

Kiss and spell,
Well, really, do tell,
Witches need spelling,
In their caves, for dwelling,
Relax and have fun,
For super Sunday fun,
Only there's clouds,
But fun still allowed,
Witches need spelling,
in caves for dwelling,
In each coven of one,
Relax, and have fun!

Hats off to Demosthenes!
Democracy, democracy,
But..
In Australia,
Bit of a failure,
Forced to vote for politicians,
We elect politicians....
We need leaders of power and vision,
Not talking heads on television!
Compelled to vote in a democracy?
Still our lucky country,
O tempora, O mores!
Democracy, democracy,
Hats off to Demosthenes!

UNEMPLOYMENT
All we hear about is unemployment,
Appears to be a global torment,
Couldn't we of  think creative solutions,
New inventions, using less pollution?
New ideas, concepts for the plebs to need,
What can we invent today? Yes indeed,
We could start by teaching global literacy,
Imagine how many books we'd need!
What about one  holistic food capsule,
Made in Australia, daily and healthful?
Then we could grow forests and sell trees,
The world does need oxygen to breathe.
We could sell books and food pills,
Get your own ideas, not such dills!
Let's hear this motto in our schools,
What can we invent today? Beautiful!

Yes, there is football again today,
The melodrama in the usual way,
Like ancient dramas, the crowds,
The roars and chorus, free kicks allowed!
His team are losing again,
Do they have a winning vein?
Television the negative conduit,
He enjoys being sad, leave him to it!
Find something else to do in another room,
Yes, chicks can have crafternoon,
That's craft and reading for me and you,
Just throw chocolate at him and  zoom!]
Why? It's  a football afternoon!

Are we good global citizens?
Didn't we sell the world Uranium?
The future is an open book--
Here's a concept worth a look,
Each of us in a calm place,
One peaceful, equitable human race,
One vast people, maybe café au lait,
One global language, perhaps,
One informal faith, for chicks and chaps,
Billions of human ants, billions,
Pigeons ready for Peace Religion,
A future for the young,
Or has capitalism really won?
Who comes second in any war?
Haven't we heard it all before?
Are we good global citizens?
Who did sell the world Uranium?
Well.............

Hello, I'm invisible,
From my thoughts,
Indivisible,
Essence I sought,
Hello, I'm invisible, a wraith,
Being invisible can be great,
Round corners I can see,
I am quite imaginary,
I travel all over for free,
Being invisible rates,
Hello, I'm invisible. Great!

I reminisce by this railway siding pond,
Musing on rail relics rattling on,
Recalling lives and times bygone,
But memories of their shades linger on,
The lonesome call of distant steam trains,
Eras that may never come again,
I see they're gone nowhere in particular,
Replaced by planes and transport vehicular,
I imagine queues on foggy platforms,
Awaiting the misted trains' shadow forms,
Standing by, expecting the status quo,
I blink my eyes, where did they all go?
Looking backwards along yesterday's track,
I'm no kid any more, get off my back,
I reflect and reminisce,
Nostalgia is for the times we miss,
I'll reminisce by the railway siding pond,
I recall the times and lives bygone,
As ghosts of rail relics keep rattling on......

Great Caesar's ghost,
Hail dictating despot!
Overlord of Rome,
His soul still roams,
Big Julie's the magnate,
His motto still rates,
"We ain't dead yet!" Great!
All hail dictating despot,
Hail, great Caesar's ghost!

Dolphins talk,
The good old talk,
Wish they'd walk,
Love to talk,
the good old talk,
Like dolphins talk,
Talk and smile,
Swim, chat for a while,
What do they think?
Calm sea like a rink,
What do they talk?
When dolphins talk
the good old talk.

Are migrants proud Australians?
Our nation based on immigration,
One polyglot meld of humanity,
To Australia show fidelity,
Our nation of peaceful tolerance,
People from Earth's shifting sands,
Living here in our Great Southern Land,
Deployment should not be our dance,
Nothing wrong with loyalty,
Patriotism our children's legacy,
---Great Southern Land,
All welcome to be Australians!

It's a shame I don't drink,
I sit here and think,
As I'm here in the bar,
Love is like algebra,
Look, your ex is gone,
No need to rave on,
Who cares why they carry on?
That's why they're now gone,
Get over it and move on...
X looks at Y,
and wonders why,
Well, love was blind,
Old Shakespeare does pine,
You must get on with life,
We agree and sigh,
I'm here in this bar,
True love is like algebra!

Earth invents gifts,
On life forms,  there's no thrift,
Earth the inventor,
Are humans the predators?
We've wrecked habitats,
Even our own, that's that!
But more Earth inventions,
New form of populations,
Earth always inventing,
Innovations designing,
What's the  best invention?
Is man an aberration?
Once a Garden of Eden,
Life we're superseding,
Still, on life forms there's no thrift,
Earth keeps inventing gifts.

It was only a legend, my dears,
A normal town, living in fear,
There were fat feral urban virgins here,
Hell bent on their pleasures, cheers!
"Down with boys' daks, get here!"
A whole town living in fear,
Was it all an urban myth, my dears?
Urban virgins strolling the streets,
Battleships waiting for boys to meet,
Immaculate conception, each miss,
Having divine parthogenesis,
Yes, real fat funster chicks,
It was all about *******,
For each little Horatio,
Or was it a fantasy of bliss,
From an  urban ****** miss?
Did urban virgins wander away?
Normal town, not a normal day,
A normal town, living in fear...
It was an urban legend, my dears.

Football exists!
It's all hit and miss,
The goals they missed,
Lost in the mists,
Supporters get miffed,
Yes, football exists,
Woe! No more need be said,
I've banished football from my head!



























































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Football exists!
It's all hit and miss,
The goals they missed,
Lost in the mists,
Supporters get miffed,
Yes, football exists!
Woe, no more need be said,
I've banished football from my head.

Let's look at this tale of Robin Hood,
He was far away, being way too good,
Rob the rich, give to the poor,
Maid Marian left open her door,
She was feeling way too generous,
Got it on with Little John, no fuss,
Far away was Robin Hood,
Really, he was much too good,
Then in came Friar Tuck,
In with Maid Marian he snuck,
Then they both got it on,
With hyperactive Little John,
Yes, Maid Marian was benevolent,
Indeed, they all knew what that meant,
Thus, this twisted tale of Robin Hood,
John, Tuck, no Robin Hood the good!

People explosion,
Over population,
Dark on the sun,
How big is too big?
Is it too many figs?
What's your solution
to people explosion?
They bring pollutions,
Over population,
Dark on the sun,
Maybe free contraception,
Some new invention?
Chemical free solutions
to people explosions,
Over population,
Dark on the sun.

I have many koalifications,
Numbed by gum leaves, stupefaction,
Glazed by arid summer drought,
Real hot today, there's no doubt!
What's this? Black storm clouds?
Who said clouds were allowed?
Now there's rain a'drenching,
Oh, it's stopped, not worth mentioning,
There's a eucalyptus Petrichor,
I'll daze now, did it rain at all?

Here am I, praying for the good,
A sister in God's brotherhood,
God loves us til the end of Earth,
A slow news day, we all deserve,
Humanity needs new policies, rad,
Save us all from anarchy-that's bad,
So, let's all pray for a slow news day,
In the world, let's have amity today,
A sister in God's brotherhood,
Praying for all that's good!

To cross bridges, let's have faith,
In the ultimate survival of the human race,
Why demonise migrants this way?
We're humans, just the same,
Even terrorists who use their creed
As a mask for greedy power, indeed,
If we spread brotherhood far and wide,
We could cross bridges that divide......

IN-FLU-ENZA
IN-FLEW-ENZA!!
This was not my today's agenda,
Hankies for snuffles my addenda,
Here I rest, moribunda,
Wintry weather down under,
Suppose it is not so bad,
Bed rest to be had,
Not in the rat race,
Cosy bed today my place,
Definitely not my today's agenda,
IN-FLU-ENZA!!!!

This is a hymn for a him,
Close your eyes, imagine,
Soft, dextrous hands in motion,
Soothing aching muscles with lotion,
Smoothing with unguents,
Rubbing with emollients,
R.....E.....L....A.....X.....I.....N......G.....
You'­ll wake up smiling,
I'll ease away your frowning,
Compliant massage dreaming,
Healing hands for him,
Close your eyes, imagine........

(Sing along to the tune 'Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer).

This is a futuristic Christmas,
Sing along in an ode,
Global warming's reached the North Pole,
That's the end of ice and snow.

The Arctic's now a surf beach,
All your gifts out of reach,
There's some really naughty bad elves,
They're keeping all the gifts for themselves!

Where did good ole Santa go?
He's been on the **!
Santa came in bad girls' lane,
And he never was seen again!

Now Santa's got survivor baggage,
Mrs. Santa tossed away his clothes,
She divorced dear old Santa,
For hoing all the hoes!

Now there's a big beach party,
No Christmases ever again!
The bad girls are giving it to Santa,
No Christmases ever again!

This is a futuristic Christmas,
Global warming's reached the North Pole,
Sing along with Santa,
A futuristic Christmas in an ode!!!

(Let's Party...** ** **, Samta knows where all the bad girls go!!)

What is death by chocolate?
Chocolate you must accumulate,
To amass your aggregate,
Are Mars Bars better than a man?
For chocolate you reach your hand,
Is there enough chocolate in the land?
Then there's housework in the world,
Best keep your strength up, girls,
Give those chocolate twirls a whirl,
A moment on our lips,
A lifetime on the hips,
Just call us cuddly from now on!
As on chocolate we ponder on,
Death by chocolate, satisfaction!

What is life like now?
No technology, somehow,
Just imagine, here and now,
If there's no technology,
We'd all manage, you see,
As in days of yore, prithee,
But you can't reverse the clock,
Retroactive, quite a shock,
If no technology somehow,
What would life be like now?

In our Universe,
Far, far away,
Once were aliens,
Or were they angels?
When gods were men,
And men were as gods,
Until the last quark
Fades away, like stars,
Ineffable love,
Perpetual cosmos,
Close but far,
Intangible to feel,
Is invisible real?
Impossible dreams,
We are generations
Too young,
Is the Universe
So very far?

Here I have a chocolate meditation,
Writing an ode for edification,
What is a chocolate meditation?
It is a packet of Tim Tams, in Oz nation,
Let's hear it  for Oz Tim Tams,
From an Australian native chocolate plant,
Thence to an endless dish,
Of chocolate biscuits, utter bliss,
No afternoon tea is complete,
For the last Tim Tam we do compete,
Giggling gerties, one and all,
Chicks can hide them in their holdalls,
Without Tim Tams, housework is incomplete,
Must keep our ample figures neat!
I've heard they're unique to Oz nation,
Tim Tams, total chocolate meditation!

I reminisce on Grandma's hands,
Her visions of Heaven's lands,
Spectacles of repose so grand,
Summer floral perfumes,
Velvet pastures for rooms,
Eternal light so divine,
Ambrosia, sweeter than wine,
I reminisce on Grandma's hands,
Gnarled, old but natural,
Her songs, hymns so musical,
Her life well spent, faithful,
I reminisce on Grandma's hands,
Her dreams came true, that's grand,
Souls in repose, in Summerland,
Her visions of Heaven's lands,
Yes,  I recall our Grandma's hands.

MARS

The Shaman and the Planet Mars,
Gazing in wonder amid the stars,
Arms raised in worship,
The Universe the Navajo church,
Ancient marvels to behold,
The human race timeless and old,
From Mars to Earth,
Did spaceships give berth?
Ramses' face on Mars,
Pondering Ptolemies from afar,
The Shaman honour singing,
Future and past aligning,
Gazing in wonder amid the stars,
The Shaman and Planet Mars.

Outside my window,
Great morning, I know,
I gaze at the flowers,
Today, rain no showers,
Summer sun's powers,
Lovely morning, I know,
Outside the window........

I'm a midnight sneak,
At Google I'll peek,
My eyes grow round and glow,
It's well after midnight, you know,
I'll filch some treats,
Addictions need sweets,
I'm quite house trained,
Computer feeds my brain,
All alone in this darkened room,
Stalking through Google's runes,
Is that five am to prowl?
Shhhh, I'm insomniac midnight Owl!

This is the fairy godmother's dream,
In this world nothing is what it seems,
A tribute to Martin Luther King,
I do  dream of a circling ring,
Of global helping, healing hands,
I dream of Peace in every land,
I dream that guns be obsolescent,
That equitable freedom be made prevalent,
I dream that hunger be obsolescent,
I dream that safe water be ever present,
I dream that children grow and play in unity,
I dream that none be taught bigotry,
I dream of women free of discrimination,
I dream of no slavery in any nation,
I dream of one global human race,
I dream of an infectious smile on every face,
I dream  of the perfect communion of the soul,
I dream that  Heaven on Earth  be our whole,
Maybe  I dream impossible dreams,
In a world where nothing is what it seems.

History of the homeless,
Society does not bless,
So unlike birds homeless,
Flying afar and so free,
Nestling into any tree,
Waking up so chirpy.
Not like humans homeless,
Society does not bless,
All these homeless young,
Did they get enough hugs?
Or was it too many drugs?
Or ****** abuse of their youth?
What's the history of the homeless--
Society does not always bless.......

Drugs in sports, teens on drugs,
Does society give them too many hugs?
Bullying and deals,
Dealers are a bunch of heels,
Teen lost to 'the scene'.
Drugs in sports,
Winning's a rort,
Most drugs wins, I thought,
Drugs in sports, teens on drugs,
Who gave them too many hugs?

Wake up negative!
Listen to that geriatric!
Wakes up so negative!
Ever tried being positive?
Go on, wake up negative!
Listen to that geriatric's
blackmail and blip,
Go on, wake up negative.

This is an ode for chicks who tough it,
About an empowered Little Miss Muffet,
Sitting alone there on her tuffet,
Along came a spider,
Who sat down beside her,
Or was he a predator?
What was he after her for?
So, she said to the spider,
Who sat down beside her,
"Rak off, hairy legs!
Don't even beg!
Less is more, less is more,
P.O.Q. , you naughty predator!"
And she ate her own curds and whey!
Empowering Miss Muffets these days,
Hopefully, us old bags do say......

Here you sit alone,
You used to froth and foam,
Abuse of women, eh,
Talking to yourself again,
You abused alcohol and drugs,
Now you're a winner with no hugs,
Yes, I guess that makes you a winner
of no privileges, now I'm a grinner,
Who does misogyny make a winner?
Nothing will save your morning teabag,
Fasting is good for you, dear, signed, this *******,
Now you're thirsty again,
You're the winner of a futile old age,
So, alcohol made you the winner,
Good day for a smile, I'm a grinner,
I'll never be your tea lady again, grinner,
So I guess that makes who a winner!

Shakespeare would have failed Naplan,
That was not in his cunning plan,
Yes, his folks would have him tutored,
To ensure Billy became learned,
He would have lost his homework,
Billy did so not want extra work,
Shakespeare, that teen scallywag,
It was total fun, such a lad.
Now Shakespeare is a wraith,
Why, Billy, why? Teens sayeth,
As they serially fail literacy tests,
Why not abolish that Billy pest?
Tragic heroes and drama queens,
That's the teens writing essays on such scenes,
While Billy failed in literacy,
Teens do sense such hypocrisy.