I checked the video page one day to see if you were on drugs
All I saw were two common folk nothing more than thugs

The love is lost;it's over now
Not entertained or amused

I'm over our entanglement
Unaffected and bemused

How to start my life again?
It's time to begin living

**** 12 steps of recovery
What was done I'm not forgiving

I'm learning how to laugh at me
And simply how to be

Progress not perfection
A lifelong revelry

The time has come to say goodbye to a past misunderstood

It's time  to make amends with me
Not a  lost "boy" from the hood

Suicidal Rain
Can you feel the pain?
It pours over me as it burns my skin
There is no kin
There is no friends
There is no end
But to put an end to you
Mom said it’s the end for him who is committing
But this is only a start for the committee

A journey to sadness
Tears fill you up
You cry and you have everything running through your mind

But you just put that gun up to your head
Put that knife up to your skin
Put that rope up to your neck
Put that pill bottle to your lips
Put your feet on that ledge and you don’t even think

Actions speak louder than words
When you can no longer speak
Suicide is a coward’s way out they said
Or maybe a paradise for the weak
Cause life picks you up and knocks you down
But sometimes so hard you want to stay on that ground
And don’t make a sound
So no one turns around
Cause you don’t want help
You just want a way out

So there comes the night
And you do what you believe is right
And you black out
No more thoughts,
No more sights,
No more sighs,
No more fright
No more light
No more any of that
You don’t have to try

While family sits by the casket and cries
"Why oh why?"
"What could we have done!"
Young life is supposed to be filled with fun

Fame comes with heartache, hurt, and drama
But once you leave the hurt is all on ya dad and momma
Or whoever you love
And they wonder is he down below or up above
You pray to God “Forgive me for this is the last of my sinning”
But with doing all this are you losing or winning?
You got out of a life that caused you sadness
But left people with unheard cries and madness

Cause sometimes it’s better to let things go
Because those hints you gave just didn’t show
Not until the action was finished
And every single piece of life was already diminished

So from all of this, what did we gain
From the horrible thoughts that you brought to life and attained
And from the messages you put out there, we thought you were playing
And not in the process of another life just slowly decaying

And people send their condolences and say it’s a shame
It’s more than shame, it’s a sequence to the chain
And now the only wish is for life to be the same
But how could it be when you’ve already felt that suicidal rain?