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Mar 2018 · 272
Untitled
Blah blah Mar 2018
Remembering him after losing him, is like losing him all over again.
I wonder if it makes sense to any of you people, but it makes a whole loy of sense to me.
Feb 2018 · 413
New Beginning.
Blah blah Feb 2018
A new smile blossomed in her life, turning all the pain into ashes.
Crushes are so important.I hope this one lasts long and long as a crush only.
Feb 2018 · 246
My last decision.
Blah blah Feb 2018
For the first time, it wasn't a thought, but a decision, my last decision.
Blah blah Nov 2017
Your heartbreak will never **** you.
It will slowly overpower you,
making you vulnerable and unguarded,
making your eyes drop to bed sheet,
Making you feel a pain more than a human body could bear.
It will consume you till your last being.
Sometimes it will hit you like a bullet,
piercing your heart right through.
But no, it will never **** you.
And one day you'll find yourself,
Lying on the floor gasping for air.
You will feel like you're dying,
But the truth is you're not.
No one has ever died of a heartbreak.
Oct 2017 · 224
Irony.
Blah blah Oct 2017
The day i looked at you,
I found love in you.
The day you looked at me,
You found love too,
Not in me, but in my eyes,
Growing for you.
Oct 2017 · 377
Untitled
Blah blah Oct 2017
The day i knew i love you,
I wanted to love you more and more.
I wanted to love you, forever.
Forever not only means till my last breath,
But till the very last breath on this planet.
I wanted to love you,
Here, walking by your side, holding your hands.
And everywhere, even from a distance, watching you grow in love and life.
I wanted to love you, in truths and lies.
Oct 2017 · 470
We all have been there.
Blah blah Oct 2017
We all have been there. Don't we?
Addicted to something that leaves us for no good.
And maybe we are all guilt ridden of some chapters we don't read out loud.
When everything hurts, every **** thing.

When you were nervous to walk out, afraid to suffer,
reluctant to meet new people.
When you try to pull with one hand,
but are forced to push with the other.
We all have been there, don't we?

When you were unable to turn your emotions down,
and anxiety ruled over you,
so you decided to disguise your love. When you were too tired of chasing things,
and getting knocked down every time, so you decided to walk away.
We all have been there, don't we?
Sep 2017 · 327
My unrequited love.
Blah blah Sep 2017
My unrequited love
has always been a constant mess,
of so many things together
the lies,
the truths,
the tender wounds,
the broken heart,
the jealous heart,
the unspoken tears,
the unforgettable moments,
the broken promises,
the hidden care,
the blissfull warmth,
And you.
I just realised this, it has always been a roller coaster ride, fearful yet exciting. The most loving loving adventure, that has a special corner in my heart, the one that is not replacable.
Sep 2017 · 781
Let go.
Blah blah Sep 2017
Today, I let go of the hurt, I used to call home.
I misconcieved the pain as love. And today i'm strong enough to let it go.
Sep 2017 · 339
Untitled
Blah blah Sep 2017
Even if you're not here,
Even if we're not in contact,
Even if its been a long time that i saw you,
Even on the days i'm angryand bitter,
Even when nothing is fine and life's a mess.
Even if my hopes are gone and my faith's fading away, slowly and slowly.
I'll still choose to be in love with you.
I'll breath deeply and slowly,
Praying for you,
Willing all my love to follow you where ever you go.
I'll love you forevermore.
Sep 2017 · 770
Losing someone.
Blah blah Sep 2017
Losing someone,
Is not a one time thing.
You lose them everyday,
Slowly and slowly,
You feel a part of yours missing everyday.
You lose someone,
When you bury your hopes,
When you stop fighting,
When you lose the urge to make things work out,
Despite the intensity of your feelings.
You may be losing them,
Everyday every moment,
But they are never lost.
They always exist within you,
Somewhere, somehow.
While losing you, i'm losing myself too.
Aug 2017 · 153
Today.
Blah blah Aug 2017
I need you to be with me.
I need you to listen to me.
I need you to stand by me.

I need you
I need yo
I need y
I need
I nee
I ne
I n
I.
I don't need you.
And then one day. I stopped saying, i stopped requesting, i stopped texting.
I realised i don't need you anymore.
Aug 2017 · 168
Untitled
Blah blah Aug 2017
Losing you, is kinda level of stress a li'l too high from my saturation.
Assi jeende aasre tere aa, naa tere bina guzaara hai.
Chaddi na chaddi na sajna saanu tera sahara ae.
Aug 2017 · 389
Untitled
Blah blah Aug 2017
From where to start,
And where can i end.
I used to write poetries
I used to dance while words sang,
They used to be my best friends,
And now they're gone.

I don't know how to express,
I don't know how to rhyme,
It feels like i've lost the feeling,
Like i've lost love of my life.

Lost or replaced, a question remains,
Maybe replaced by a never ending pain.
This pain stops me from writing,
This pain has left me with nothing,
Either it makes me feel itself,
Or it makes me feel nothing.

I don't deserve to be loved,
I don't deserve to live,
I've nothing to give in return,
I'm just holding on to these noisy breaths.

I slit my wrists, i slit my hands,
I slit my thighs, i slit my skin,
Not to shake hands with death,
But just a try to say a firm 'hello' to life.
Just in case if those scribbles on my skin could make me feel anything, and i woukd feel alive. Just in case, only.
Aug 2017 · 384
Reality
Blah blah Aug 2017
The most tender wounds don't bleed.
And if they ask me why it hurts so much, i'd tell them this.
Aug 2017 · 304
A letter to my parents.
Blah blah Aug 2017
And maybe some of you care about me.
And don't want me to die.
And feel a bucket full and flowing and flowing kinda pain,
If i die.
Maybe some of you would stare blankly at the wall,
Regret a few words of yours and miss me.
Maybe some of you would go out of your way to get me back.
Maybe some of you are just my mommy and daddy.
Maybe you love me at times,
And maybe you contribute to my depression at times.
But one thing remains,
You're my parents and I, I'm your child.
And losing your child ain't easy, no?
And maybe if i'm holding my heavy breaths,
the reason are you.
I know I'm a bad child,
And by choosing suicide over you,
I don't want to be the worst.

Maybe if you people were are as careless as you're today after my death too,
And be least bothered of my feelings as you're today after my death too.

I'd have died long ago.
Aug 2017 · 982
Untitled
Blah blah Aug 2017
"Aren't you tired of feeling the pain again and again.
Looking for the lost pieces,
You know lost things never find their way back, right?
Don't you feel worn out of stretched skin and aching muscles.
You know its making you look pale and fragile, right?
Aren't you fed up of looking for long lost happiness.
You know its not coming back, right?
Don't you feel sick of being desperate for just warmth and love.
You know they don't exist, right?"

"You need to do something other than getting hurt all the time."

"I know, I know.
I'm trying."
And when i wrote this, the clock said 23:59.
Aug 2017 · 491
You can't feel me.
Blah blah Aug 2017
"How do you write so beautiful creative lines? The things you write, i can actually feel them. Trust me you build homes for long lost nomads, and decorate them so gracefully with your words.",someone said.

Listening to him she sighed, this wasn't any sigh of relieve but a sigh of anxiety and Frustration building up in her mind, but she chose to remain calm. She took a deep breath, a breath of disappointment and sadness.
She looked up to him.

"You know what people have fears and so do I. Some are afraid of clowns, some of spiders or heights. While some fear the dark. But I, I fear people feeling the as same i do. Every time i miss him, i feel my lungs burning empty, my heart hitting the chest so hard that it would break my ribs and rip apart my skin. There's a void in my head, a hollow black hole reaching deep inside my soul, slowly swallowing all my hopes and dreams. And no matters if its 3:00 in the noon, or 3:00 am, i feel the same, i feel a vacuum enduring my happiness, and I, I feel nothingness.
I question myself sitting in my room "where I'm?". On getting no answer i slender my fingers pressed into the skin of my forehead. I take on a sharp razor to slit my skin, drawing beads of blood. I try to calm myself, but soon the anxiety turns up into panic. And i get lost." she paused and sighed fighting back her tears.

"you can't feel me, you're barely aware of the words i write, you haven't faced my demons yet. And i wish you never will." she said.
Just when she was about to give up and cry, she relaxed and smilingly lit up her face to a person she truly never was and will never be.
She walked away.
Aug 2017 · 167
Just a thing.
Blah blah Aug 2017
If you don't get broken, how will you fall apart?
And if you don't fall apart, how will you learn life?
I was just wondering. What do you think?
Aug 2017 · 337
Untitled
Blah blah Aug 2017
You ain't my master, and I won't commit to you as long as you are the only loved one I'm left with.
I won't give up on my pain.
Aug 2017 · 300
No title.
Blah blah Aug 2017
I had a bestfriend.
She used to keep my sercets.
She used to be my constant.
And one day,
Depression took her place.
Lets not assign it any title. Let it be five phrases joined together to describe the current phase I'm living in.
Jul 2017 · 464
I have a fantasy to tell.
Blah blah Jul 2017
I HAVE A FANTASY TO TELL.
The last day, I'll be lying in bed, the room won't be familiar with white walls and some machines around, one of them showing my heartbeats drifting slowly and slowly towards silence. When there will be only one door left, and death will be waiting to greet me ahead.
Apart from my own noisy breath there's nothing to be heard and then, there will be a sudden knock on the door. As I'll see the person, my senses will be robbed and replaced by a paralysing fear. A fear of "last time". "Stay with me, just a little more,
As Its time for destiny to close the doors.
Maybe it is the last time,
You are mine and i am yours." I'll whisper to you smiling and my eyes full of tears.
Adding on I'll say "l love you and I'm gonna love you forevermore". You'll ask me for a dance. And the music will play " Lag jaa gale, ke fir ye hasi raat ** na **, shayad fir iss janam mulaakat ** na **". Feared from all my fears I'll grab you more close, and we'll dance to live my eternity on toes. With no life left in my body I'll still move and I'll bring my face close to yours just to feel you breathe for the last time. I'll look into your eyes to look me there, and kiss your cheeks to bid goodbye with care.
As my eyesight will blur , my desperate arms will clutch you tightly, my eyes still there and i will feel myself blink, still instinctively moisturizing the organs I will have no use for. And then I'll realise my breath fading away, I'll close my eyes and rest my head on chest.
Slowly and slowly my body will calm down and this pain will come to rest. Embraced in your arms I'll drown to my last breath.
So whats your fantasy?
Blah blah Jul 2017
Hey best friend, I couldn't tell if its good to be with you or the things get worse off. But you are only thing i feel truly, when I'm alone in the dark or when I'm in the brightest sun surrounded by hundreds of unknowns. I like it here with you in the black, it's better than emptiness, trust me.
They say it can't rain forever, that there will come a time when it must cease, when the last drop will have fallen and no more will be left. But to me, I just don't care. I don't wait for that last drop. I am okey to be here, just staying in the cold, comfortably numb with you.
What i carry with me is heavy, and it gets heavier day by day. I don't want to carry it but I've no choice. It follows me like a shadow, sneaky reminder of where I'm, and how this place Just doesn't belong to me. It hits me like a rock and crushes me into pieces.
Shattered, broken, tired, I stand here struggling to keep breathing when my entire body seemed to sag with exhaustion. I for once again start collecting up the pieces to readjust them to their original places. So, I've thought of staying here with you, as its better to be sad than falling in a hollow where there's no end. Don't you think the same?
Day by day everything is growing in strength else than me. I wonder if things will get better but I no longer hope so. I am just inhaling and exhaling in the moments greeting the sun every next morning in a grief no less than bereavement.
Dear bestfriend, you and I are bound together by destiny.
Jul 2017 · 239
Books.
Blah blah Jul 2017
In front of books, movies never stand a chance. Even if they hold the same story.
When watching a movie a person focuses on protagonist and antoganist.but reading a book gives you so much more, even the things you avoid while watching, you feel them while reading.
Jun 2017 · 291
Promise
Blah blah Jun 2017
In your darkest unlit nights,
Black clouds seizing lights,
I'll talk to moon,
To flare for you so bright.
I promise.
You can leave me in the dark, and I'll give you all my sunshine. I will always love you. I miss you idiot.
Jun 2017 · 564
Did i told you?
Blah blah Jun 2017
Did i told you ?
"you hurt me"
Yes,  you heard me right, you hurt me.
With every action of yours.
Intentional or unintentional,
You should know they were destructive.
Did i told you ?
"I got physically tired, and emotionally drained.
Yes, you heard me right you drained my emotions leaving me empty.
With every word of yours.
Intentional or unintentional,
You should know they were devastating.
Did i told you?
"how much i cried that day"
Yes, you heard me right, you made me cry, getting me on my knees, as i listened to my own voice like a helpless distressed child, the muscles of my cheeks trembled.
With every step of yours.
Intentional or unintentional,
You should know they were terribly crushing.
Did i told you?
"I lost my spirit"
Yes, you heard me right, you theft my spirit, leaving me numb, with thoughts of ending my life for there's nothing left.
With every statement of yours.
Intentional or unintentional,
You should know it was shattering.
Yes i did told you, it was just you never understood. Your actions, your words,  your statements ,****** you,
You, yes you,
You turned out to be a blithe sadist.
Jun 2017 · 497
I lose.
Blah blah Jun 2017
Each step forward, I found his ego winning over my love.
Maybe we'll meet somewhere in oblivion. Parallel lines never intersect in real world.
Jun 2017 · 551
The truth.
Blah blah Jun 2017
When things are falling apart, They're actually falling apart. Don't assume them to be falling into place.
Don't settle down with a better dressed lie.Don't let it soothe your delusional heart, let the naked truth reach to your soul ,let it hurt a you a li'l more each time, to remind you that you're still in love, In love with an idiot who will never understand.
I miss him so much.
Jun 2017 · 478
I remember.
Blah blah Jun 2017
I still remember your last touch. That set my body on fire, and still felt like everything in me was at peace.
Jun 2017 · 281
Not enough
Blah blah Jun 2017
And sometimes love isn't enough.
Like mine wasn't.
Jun 2017 · 273
People
Blah blah Jun 2017
People, are more like fragments with sharp edges, the more you let them in, the more they hurt.
**** people.
May 2017 · 285
Untitled
Blah blah May 2017
The harder it is getting to endure the pain, the harder it is getting to resist the crave to feel it.
As days are passing, its not healing, its getting deeper and deeper with every flashback turned into tears. I can no longer hold it in.
I wish you could've understood me a li'l better, i wish i could've tried a li'l more, I wish you to have stayed a li'l more, I wish my weren't just wishes.
May 2017 · 610
Don't call me strong.
Blah blah May 2017
I am not strong.
If I'm holding it in, don't call me strong.
i am weak, to yell it out.
I am weak, to hear what loneliness shout.
I am not strong.
If I'm fighting my tears,
If I'm keeping it in,
If I'm faking a smile,
If I'm laughing around.
Don't call me strong.
I am scared, for the coming wrong.
I am scared, of this depression to last long.
I am not strong,
If I'm holding it, don't call me strong.
For once i need someone, who gives me my freedom to be weak.
May 2017 · 206
Untitled
Blah blah May 2017
Only if he could understand the love, that still existed in between those broken pieces.
World would have been a li'l better place for her.
May 2017 · 356
Sorry.
Blah blah May 2017
Sorry, I got a li'l imbalanced with your uneven promises.
I wish you were here. Here to see how it feels. You left me when i needed you, but you promised to stay, then where are you now?
May 2017 · 721
Alone.
Blah blah May 2017
Walking alone,
I entered the room of pain.
I tried hard to escape,
But all my efforts were in vain.
I realised i am in a room full of dark, i see no entrance no exit. I don't know from where i came here. It felt like the blackhole ,dark and dangerous.I see no light. I see no way. As i moved in , it got more and more darker.Soon  I realised i have lost my way.
May 2017 · 548
I fell.
Blah blah May 2017
I fell for someone,
Someone who watched me fall,
with no intentions to catch me.
May 2017 · 1.9k
Relations.
Blah blah May 2017
Heartily connections sarisfies me no more, I need to meet your soul.
May 2017 · 451
Stay, just a li'l more.
Blah blah May 2017
Stay with me, just a little more,
Anytime destiny might be closing the doors.
So stay close a little more,
Hugging me against every inch of yours.
Making love in way never known before.
For it will be the last time,
You'll be mine and I'll be  yours.
Apr 2017 · 566
I miss you.
Blah blah Apr 2017
I can't say "tu me manques", for it means "you're missing from me". As you're not you're always there in my heart, hugging my soul.
Its just i miss you, your presence.
Apr 2017 · 896
In love.
Blah blah Apr 2017
The more she untangled her soul,
The more she discovered how deeply in love she was.
I do efforts to get away from you,
The farther i move,
The closer i get to you. ♡
Apr 2017 · 348
Words.
Blah blah Apr 2017
In those silenced nights, I inaudibly screamed through words.
When my feelings are too lame. When my thoughts are too stupid.
When insanity is their cause and insanity is what they explain.
I write.
Apr 2017 · 496
Challenge.
Blah blah Apr 2017
You challenge my love by loving her the way i love you.
And i can stand you not loving me. But i can't stand you loving her. Its breaks me to see you look at her the way i look at you.
Apr 2017 · 381
Him ♥
Blah blah Apr 2017
And i can see my forever in him.
Lying in his arms, embraced by his warmth.
I know i love him, and him only.
My eyes closed,
And i can see my forever in him. ♥
Apr 2017 · 443
I love him.
Blah blah Apr 2017
Why is it you never leave my mind? Why are you always there, in every thought,  in every phrase?  Why don't you stop pinging me? Each and Every second i wonder about you. I think of you. I miss you and i love you.
I no longer hope for you to love me. For there's no reason to me. If I were you maybe i wouldn't have loved me too. But every night i dream of a life with you, no matter how much pain it gives, but i love every moment of it. When reality tortures me, i look for a home in my dreams.
I love you. I can say it a thousand of times,  and it still wont be enough to tell you how much i love you. I may write hundreds of poetries and it still won't be able to tell you my feelings for you. After every write up i realise there's still a lot more to say. Maybe it will take lifetime to tell you for how much i love you.
No matter how many times i say i love you, once or twice (tho i love repeating this little sentence over and over) , I say it to remind you there's someone who loves you a lot. I never say to hear it back, i say it because i want to make sure you know.
I know you don't feel the same. Its ohkey. You don't need to reciprocate the love. You just need to keep the love i give you. You just need to be happy and smiling always.
I never planned on this, and then i realise why the unexpected things makes the best moments. And why the most unexpected persons in your life means the most to you. ♥
I Can't t possibly think of a moment where i don't love him. Even if i am angry i love him. Even if i cry i love him. In every dream i love him. There's no reason to unlove him. Feels like my love was made for him. And him only. ♥
Apr 2017 · 252
Forget-me-not.
Blah blah Apr 2017
Feels Like your heart once whispered to my heart "forget-me-not".
I cant take you off my mind even for a split second.
Apr 2017 · 385
Come to me
Blah blah Apr 2017
Come to me,
And ask for space.
I will give you my world.
Come to me,
And ask for help,
And I'll cross hells for you.
Come to me,
And ask for love,
And I'll give you my heart.
Come to me,
And ask for light,
And I'll get those stars.
Come to me,
And ask for "who you are? "(to me)
And I'll reply my life.

Come to me,
Just a little closer this Time.
And I'll whisper how it feels.
Whisper sounds " I love you".
Apr 2017 · 284
With or without you.
Blah blah Apr 2017
Even with your presence you are not here.
Even if you are sitting beside me, i find your heart nowhere.

I feel my heart and my mind doesn't cope,
My heart need your presence, and my mind destroys all the hopes.

Nothing really changes ,you may or may not be here,
Loving you is like a drug to me, leaving this addiction is a strong dare.
Apr 2017 · 472
You should have known.
Blah blah Apr 2017
You should have known a girl really did loved you.
Each word she wrote was deeply true.
You should have known those feelings were too hard to hold,
A gorgeous love poem those glooming eyes urged to be told.
You should have known you were not just a person but something much more,
Maybe that's why you were the only person her heart loved to the core. ♥
Apr 2017 · 278
Lets make love.
Blah blah Apr 2017
In the darkest of nights,
And the stars shining bright,
Lets make love.

In a special kind of way,
Your fingers running tenderly through my hair,
Lets make love.

When your eyes are reflecting moonlight,
Just hold onto me tight, and,
Lets make love.

Listening to your tempting voice,
With me appreciating you as my choice,
Lets make love.

The warm embrace of your arms,
And your touch healing my soul,
Lets make love.

A lil forehead kiss and nothing more,
With all these small gestures,
Lets make Love.
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