It all seemed to go by so quick
Like the second hand on a clock
It felt so surreal like a tick
All I hear is a click, like tock

The morning of seemed so bright
We said goodbye as normal
And then came the night
When everything felt so formal

There was a knock on the door
Followed by the drop of a glass
But it wasn’t the drop of wine that hit the floor
It was tears for feelings that would never surpass

In a few months she would have been a bride
How is it fair for one to be deprived
What more could I have tried
Now the clock is stuck at 4:45

Time itself knew to stand still
So, each day I take a walk
To a little spot up the hill
And each day I sit and stare at the clock

How foolish is it to leave fate
To leave fate in the hands of luck
How could I help being so moonstruck
It does carry a great weight

I bet it all on a coin toss
Heads I tell you; tails I do not
Either way it was worth a shot
Sooner or later, I would get my point across

Although the answer was never important
It was the look you gave after
Like you were falling from the rafters
But we both knew this would be inadvertent

So, I told you, hoping it wouldn’t be to no avail
It’s funny how a coin toss can decide your fate
And almost make you miss something great
As I put the coin away, knowing it landed on tails

He sat lounged back in the chair
The sun shing into his face
Almost as if he had been hit by mace
Yet he didn’t care

There was a point in life where he did
But time took care of that
So, he just sits there with his hat
With nothing left to bid

Even the smallest piece of paradise he still stresses
He works too much to know how to live
And he lives too little to give
It’s his normal for life to be a mess

One day his body will die
For his spirit has been long gone
He himself has become a pawn
A crippled bird who can no longer fly

I never wanted any of this
I didn’t see for it
What would I have missed
What more could you fit

Now it’s almost as if I’m blinded
How could anything but you have a prettier glow
Maybe I should resort to being empty minded
Or is it better to know?

When I’m around you I can’t pretend
My walls are down and I’m there stuck
I question if my heart could ever mend
Yet I gamble on fool’s luck

Dreaming of the days to come
Quietly understanding that there may be non
Hoping they won’t leave me numb
Patiently waiting until the day is done

For love is a flick and a flame
Each step leads to a darker night
There is no true one to blame
And so, we become each other’s light

A flower can bloom many times
Each one different from the rest
Each bloom goes through its own test
Just as we have our own climbs

Strong roots will get you far
But faith and perseverance will take you farther
And lead you through when things get darker
Sonn you’ll shine brighter than a star

Thank you for being our inspiration
The seeds you planted long ago have grown
From all the love that you have shown
For when we bloom, we too shall have a good foundation

It’s going to be a good Christmas day
I wake up and say

As I rise from my bed
My eyes become to dread

The ugly sight I see
For what could cause this misery

A candle still on fire
It burns in tune with desire

A tree knocked down
With ornaments on the ground

The house is so empty
For what spirits could lift me

Leaks all through the ceiling
Who else could lose this much feeling

The sun that burns low
What used to be home has lost its glow

A table set for one
For visitors there will be none

And when I sleep tonight
I wish to dream of something bright

Walk, walk, get up and walk
Hide, hide, go on and hide
Rest your eyes on the ticking clock
How many times have you died

Let it pierce, let it sting your skin
Fade yourself away into black
You’re long past committing sins
Soon you won’t be anything but a plaque

Another name on another stone
Just another hole in the ground
It’s too late now to pick up the phone
Even then you couldn’t make a sound

Your head falls, leaving a needle on the floor
We’ve been here many times before
But this time no one’s waiting at the door
I guess a habit is a habit and one that you can’t ignore

They say your heart skips a beat, is it true?
Sometimes it feels as if mine adds two
I think you can read me by the look in my eyes
These feelings fly, just as birds in the sky

The leaves and their changing colors
Are no match for you my lover
Rest your weary eyes upon my soul
Let’s fade to black just like coal

Let’s plant seeds to grow flowers in our hearts
Or run away somewhere for a fresh start
Please do try to understand
I’m broke and may never be a better man

So when the rain drops begin to fall
Try not to make yourself feel small
Look past the darkness of the night
And I’ll tell you everything will be alright

The sun rises everyday
And so, it sets every night
The same way a boat docks at bay
Before it goes out searching for light

Though it’s true what they say about fool’s gold
We spend so much time searching we become lost
In this we learn the true treasure is to be bold
So bold you would never know what it cost

As the sun starts to set
Instead of going out, go get some rest
And as the sun rises early in the morning, so it seems so far away
Take leave in your boat, go touring and sail along your own merry way

I want to belong somewhere
Where? well I guess I don’t really care
Just a warm spot to soak in the sun
Somewhere to hide when the day is done

With the freedom of the wind at my back
To atone for all the good, I lack
It seems there’s more wrong than right these days
I find myself mostly in the grey

Let me be easy on my brothers
Kind and patient like none other
An inspiration for those to dream
A guiding force just as a support beam

So, when it does become my time
Convict me of a victimless crime
For I don’t want to live forever
Just let me enjoy the harsh weather

I play my cards close to the vest
But I make sure to do my best
So, when I do start to feel like less
Lay my body down to rest

The measure of a man is judged by his actions
Not by the way he walks, nor by the way he talks
For many are guilty of infractions
But to me that is no shock

Reflection is a virtue, that few understand
I don’t like the person I see
The hurt caused for the upperhand
All the pain and all the misery

The ones I love have turned to strangers
Bad habits and fever dreams
I continue throwing myself into danger
As if I know what it all means

Maybe I should have put up a facade
Let these feelings continue to linger
Allow myself to corrade
Yet you replaced me in anger

I’ve gotten good at hiding the guilt on my face
A cold should has become second nature
You felt as soft as lace
You were meant for someone much greater

If you were a ship in the sea
Then I would be your anchor
Holding you down from where you belong to be
So sell the ship, go and find a banker

I look out on the sea
The colors reflect those of my eyes
The same ones that always make me feel free
For out here there is no ties

It’s just me and an empty vessel
More than a question, but less than an answer
A quiet place for one to nestle
A saving grace from those who banter

It’s a quiet life out here
But there’s a peacefulness that comes with
The kind the brings forth no fear
Almost as if its a myth

I fear that I fear no man
I fear that I have become what I oppose
For this place there’s nowhere for me to stand
Just throw me in the river, let me rest with the crows

I flip a coin, I flip a coin
Heads or tails? You crack a smile
What will it take for you to join
What would it take to make it worthwhile

You give a glance that says another time
But I’m reckless and impatient, I’m bound to do wrong
Why does loving you seem so much like a crime
I remain silent as you drag us along

Maybe it was a mistake
Or just maybe it is what was needed
For you, I could never forsake
And our feelings have been pleaded

Before you go tell me once more
Is there a future with us
Is there a version where my heart is not tore
I kiss you before you get on the bus

The months that I followed, I couldn’t shake the tears in my eyes
I guess you couldn’t either, so you called
The truth gets hard, sometimes it’s easier to tell lies
But you said you were coming back, right after the fall

It seemed like we were finally ready to make something out of this misery
We had all our hopes and dreams, but we never got far
That life will always remain a mystery
All that’s left is a one-page obituary, form an overdose is your car

A 1,000 sailors have nothing against a few well groomed tailors
However a rich man could not last a second in a pile of quick sand
The call to sea is the same as that of a call to a tree
They are both living and dead, Their growth is the giving bread
One serves their master at the bay, the other spends time selling hay
The water is fresh in both cases and both men have seen many faces
A sailor never retires, but a tailor does as such
For when he is no longer a tailor, he considers himself a failure
Yet he continues on, looking for a cause, never taking a pause
Until one day, walking by the shore he sees something so beautiful his eye begin to sore
So he takes his riches, buys a ship, summons a crew, and plans his trip
Heading to nowhere in sight, only to see the beauty so bright
And so the man was once a tailor, he is now a sailor

Why, why am I so obsessed?
Obsessed with the sea and sky
Is it because I feel blessed
Or do I wish I could fly

Fly away from all my troubles
The little that there is
Could I ever be that humble
I guess it’s better living in ignorance bliss

Is it delusional to dream as such
Wishing for something to happen
Even I can see myself blush
If only I were a ship’s captain

Sailing the seas; living free
Certainly, I should grow tired
Yet I would sail until her eyes were in front of me
And she’ll know that love does not expire

It sounds so easy in my head
Maybe it’s time I played the cards I was dealt
The sun going away, doesn’t meant there’s anything to dread
The sunset is pleasant, but there’s nothing more resplendent than herself

I’ve been here a thousand times
All of which I seen you cry
I’ll ask you what is wrong
But you’ll just sit there on the floor

I would have committed a thousand crimes
Just to see you get up and try
You’ll try to tell me that I’m wrong
But here you are asking me for more

So, I’ll waste a thousand dimes
And never question you why
And I’ll hope you’re not gone long
As I watch you walk out the door

I’ve been here a thousand times
All of which I seen you cry
I ask what is wrong
But you’ll just sit there on the floor

Stuck in this prison, behind the white walls
My eyes see them walk
My ears hear them talk
How could I be the fool that falls

In a room full of lights
I lean towards nothing but the dark
Even in my own thoughts I cannot find a spark
For I wish I could fly and take flight

I call, I call, an answer to be
Why, why am I here
And why is no one near
Who am I to flee

For now, I have left the room behind
And far shall I go
To a place that nobody knows
But yet I’m stuck in another room in my mind

Stuck in this prison, behind the white walls
My eyes see them walk
My ears hear them talk
How could I be the fool that falls

There’s twenty minutes until four
I comb my hair and take a seat
I can’t hide this smile anymore
As I tremble my nerves to my feet

One last chance to run out the door
It’s time to close the door of being alone
I couldn’t have asked for more
You would have thought that she’s my clone

If the universe every tried to split us apart
It would slice itself in half and cease to exist
There’s not stronger love than the one forged in our hearts
It truly is likes a bliss

I can picture now, the way she smiles
When she makes her way down the aisle
It’ll make it all worthwhile
Even if it took me a thousand miles

The bells are ringing, it’s time to go
Time to make myself a new heading
Time to let my love show
For it’s her and I’s wedding

Black
Colorless, Empty
Absorbing, Fading, Smothering
Death, Sadness - Life, Joy
Enlightening, Illuminating, Reflecting
Clean, Pure
White

Today I lived
Not just once. But twice
Without knowledge to give

I felt many ways of pain
And seen twice the rainy days
So, what was there to gain

I climbed the mountain ranges
Sunk down to the ocean floor
But what was left to change

I grew up quick
For where I came from, you have to
So, I started my wall, brick by brick

Today I learned
Not everything works out
And so, my drive, continues to burn

The day is normal as any other day
Johnny wakes up for school with a note by his bed
His mom tells him to behave and apologies she couldn't stay
He gets up and combs the hair on his head

On the way to school he cuts through the rail-yard
He stops for a minute to put some pennies on the track
On the way out he slips past the old guard
Times dwindling down, he knows he has to pack up the slack

At school he’s greeted by no one
He sits alone in his class, dreaming of escaping
Pondering to himself if it could really be done
As he stares out the window at the landscaping

When school is out, he rushes to the local diner
He scarfs down enough food to feed a family of four
As if he hasn't had any food that's finer
After he's finished, he still asks for more

On the way home he collects his now flatted pennies
He tucks them away in his pocket
Back at home he has plenty
He’s saving up to buy a rocket

A rocket to fly away from here
To go somewhere only he will know
So, then he will no longer fear
If only he was able to go

By the time he gets home, the sun has faded away
He walks through the door and shuts it lightly
He looks to broken glass on the ground with a loss of words to say
And he holds his fist ever so tightly

Before he can take another step, he is pushed to the ground
He feels a drop of beer hit his face
He looks up and his father ask if his mother has been around
Johnny doesn't answer, his father calls ham a disgrace

A few more bottles are thrown in anger
Johnny is then thrown and locked in his room
He wishes she could have taken him with her
And not leave him to this doom

Johnny cries though the night
Praying for a chance to leave
To fly away like a kite
He wonders if his being too naïve

When he wakes the day is as normal as any other day
Johnny wakes up for school with a note by his bed
His mom tells him to behave and apologizes she couldn't stay
He gets up combs his hair and wishes his father was dead

I met a pretty girl with soft brown eyes
And for a while she couldn’t read between my lies
Her brown hair shined with streaks of blonde
Deep inside it was hard to not feel a bond

The seasons changed and the grass went away
It was around this time, I was left with only a few words to say
We took a walk down to the water fountain
There on the lower east side of Spring Mountain

The smartest person in the world was sitting in front of me
Yet even she was too blind to see
I’m a betting man, but this was a gamble like none other
It hurt too much to let these things stay smothered

We walked in silence on the way back
By the time I dropped her off, the sky had faded to black
The darkness was the epitome of my head
Full now of answers, from the questions I dread

That pretty girl said she’d keep me in mind
She also said to give her some time
In time perhaps it will all rhyme
And I’ll go on to find

I met a pretty girl with soft brown eyes
That can read between my lies
Whose brown hair shines with streaks of blonde
And isn’t afraid to dream beyond

Look yourself in the mirror
Tell me what it is you see
Is your mind any clearer
Has the guilt made you free

Take a step into the light
Is it harder to walk each step
Whys your face beginning to turn so white
Are you finally ready to accept?

The pain and anger held in your heart
Doesn't it burn you up inside
To know you played a part
So go on and hide

Yourself away from your feelings
Go ahead burn all the bridges
But the gamblers still dealing'
And you’re stuck on the ridge

It’s time to face the truth
Be a better man
Go dump that bottle of Vermouth
Lookout into the dam

Face your fears and make that climb
Watch yourself as the fire burns
Time to face the demons in your mind
So, buddy when are you ever going to learn

I don’t recognize your face
Even worse I feel out of place
There’s so many words to say
But that would take more than a day

Freedom is a burden
I choose to live in sin
By the choices I make
And the feelings I fake

Some point the world will get even
At that point I may start believing
I am who I am
Nobody else can give a ****

If I do any wrong
I’ll still be strong
I won’t feel guilty
I am the one who built me

A father, a brother, a son
A friend, a lover, a foe
Who do you see? Why do you run?
Is it yourself or do you no longer know

Is it the demons? Is it the ghosts?
Of those ******, or those lost
Or is it those you hurt the most
Do you ever wonder what it cost

Open your eyes, tell me what do you see
It’s too late to ask for forgiveness
All I see is misery
Leaving you alone, alone in the bliss

You may ask who I am
The better question is who are you?
Open your eyes and act like you give a ****
Answer the question who is who?

Open your eyes and look in the mirror
Is that tears falling down your cheek?
Is it worse than you have come to fear?
Is the man in the mirror who you seek?

If I were a cloud, I would fly away
So far that none of my troubles could stay
I would pick a shape that fits me best
And hover myself over to rest

If I were the wind, I would settle down
And let the leaves take their selves to the ground
I would only move when the time is right
Such as a little one flying a kite

If I was the sun, I would shine for all
So bright nobody could be sure of what they saw
I would be a burst of energy, like something fun
To pick people up and let them know the days not done

Yes, if I was this, or if I was that
I could make my own new habitat
I could bring forth new definitions
oh yes, I would be a true magician

But it’s all in my head, and I am just myself
So, I'll put these ideas on a bookshelf
It’s all make believe, so it seams
Just me, myself, and I stuck in a daydream

You wear your heart on your sleeve
Like Christmas day and New Years Eve
I remember staring up too late
Like we did on our first date

With a snow beaten covered path
You smile, I just laugh
I thought I’d never feel this way
I thought I’d never see the day

But here I am, staring in your eyes
With feeling like we could fly
You say darling don’t you waste your time
Don’t you know it’s a crime

So I’ll hang my hat on the door
And hold you close like I did before
Now I know you’re the one
I promise you not to run

If I go, if I stay, I promise we’ll be okay
If we fight, a different night, we’ll find a way
There’s too much love within our hearts
Why don’t we just restart

I’ll say you have a pretty smile
You’ll tell me to stay awhile
Listening to Help Me Make it Through the Night
As we lay and watch the Northern Lights

Think of all the time we waste
With all the problems we have faced
Hold your breath and face the sun
Hold me close and love me, now that the day is done

Each day a letter comes
Each night it goes unread
Sometimes they stack up like moldy bread
But each week they’re burned in a drum

The weather says clear, but the sky’s need to cry
Poison in the air has taken many lives
Even us here have to learn to survive
On planes the bodies are sent back of the ones who died

I try for a walk and see his shadow
I don’t get far but down the street
To an old coffee shop where we would meet
I order a drink and watch the crows

On my walk home, the trees look bare
The concrete is growing strong on the grass
And the flags are all set to half mass
In the mailbox, is a letter from Vietnam; with a slight tear

Sun, sun, sun, stay awhile
For the world can be so vile
What's it like up there
Is the weather fair

Sky, sky, sky, fly me away
Take me and leave me somewhere to stay
As I look on the beauty of earth
Provide me a new life to give Birth

Oh river, river, river take me down stream
Help me to realize what it all means
Am I tired or am I true
Let me try your shade of blue

Mr. Moon, moon, moon let me shine
And tell me everything will be just fine
For in the darkest of the nights
You're still beaming bright

Sun, sun, sun let me undo what’s been done
For you and I have had a good run
Just set the back down to rest
And know I really did try my best

Do you think of what could be
And in those dreams, do you miss me
I thought I was ok with how it was
Getting high off your buzz


But now I have come to find
You cannot leave my mind
In the darkest rooms
My desire for you still looms

But I must act as a stranger
To protect myself from the danger
I hope that you may understand
Perhaps someday I can still be your man

Until the day of then
I'll sit and remember when
When two hearts burned for each other
With a love like no other

Do you remember when
We would walk in winter
Holding our breath in the chilling wind
Waiting to see who was the winner

Or maybe the summer skies
The fields where we hid
Isn’t it funny how time flies
Especially now that we aren’t kids

What about the ol house
The one that was condemned
Remember when you go scared of that mouse
Aren’t you glad we settled in the west end

I can still see the look you gave
That time I brought home that raggedy old car
Back when money was hard to save
Or course we never worried about setting any bars

It’s been a long time now
And each day with you feels like a thousand more
I shake my head sometimes and say wow
For how could you fall for me and not walk out the door

Do you think of what could be
And in those dreams, do you miss me
I thought I was ok with how it was
Getting high off your buzz


But now I have come to find
You cannot leave my mind
In the darkest rooms
My desire for you still looms

But I must act as a stranger
To protect myself from the danger
I hope that you may understand
Perhaps someday I can still be your man

Until the day of then
I'll sit and remember when
When two hearts burned for each other
With a love like no other