I hear the wood creaking
under his steps
His heavy breath
Echoes in the
     long, empty hallway
His whistling
It gets louder
     the pitch gets higher
as he comes closer
The tune
I realize I've heard it before
I've seen him before
A friend.
His eyes, they're always so
happy
Now, the spark is
gone
insanity
madness
It has to be
My heart beats faster
racing
like never before
It's about to jump
I swear he can hear it
The steps
they're closer
so close
Silence.
He's standing at the door,
I know it.
I shiver in hiding
and hear my shallow breath echo
in the darkness
in which I hide
Silence.
he's waiting.
The **** slowly turns
and he creaks the door
open
slowly
Light streams into the room
all I see is
the light
it gets wider, the light
no whistling
no steps
just heavy breathing
and my heart beating
he takes a step

Goodbye.

creative destruction
too beautiful to fault until ashes
(and even then all I want is a different ending or none at all).
silent sunrise that you can’t hear but you can feeeEEEEL
elsewhere.
the hum of existence and how you always danced around it
and coincidently it never lined up for me.
self is such a strange concept that sometimes I forget
and other times it consumes and I am    sorry  so    sorry.
what are you if you aren’t always discovering?
what is she when there is a cost?
what would she have been if rewind and stand outside to see truth
it’s like looking through a kaleidoscope
what is the magnitude?
axiom
this is called spring
and I’m through wasting it.

It's so strange,
How I get so happy with
hundreds of people that I don't know
seeing the core of my thoughts
It's so very strange, because I'm so very shy
and if it was to be in the flesh
or on a stage
I'd be shaking
and trying to not let it show
but I don't see what's wrong when
about a thousand people see my thoughts

My soul is trapped within
this room.
A bit strange and yet so familiar.
Or so I see.
It’s amazing how much
of a mistake
I am.
Just want to forget,
but can’t.

Do you see the scars?
I can

Within this shattered heart,
a victim.
A tiny locket all its own.
Devoid of feeling for me.
It’s amazing how much
of a mistake
I am.
Just want to forget,
but can’t.

Do you feel pain?
I can.

My voice is lost within
the echo.
It’s all around me, but
What I hear is not really me.
It’s amazing how much
of a mistake
I am.
Just want to forget,
but can’t.

Do you hear the harp playing?
I can.

Upon these unloved lips
blood drops.
A familiar earthborn tang of deception.
It I can taste.
It’s amazing how much
of a mistake
I am.
Just want to forget,
but can’t.

Do you taste salted tears?
I can.

My birth is sweetened citrus,
a boy.
Citrine and earthy.
An aroma of anguish.
It’s amazing how much
of a mistake
I am.
Just want to forget,
but can’t.

Do you smell the rain coming on?
I can.

Can you write in the dark?
I can.

I’m trying to find something to base my life upon,
Something in this strange world that goes on and on.
As the years go by and time fades away,
What used to be "good days" are now filled with dismay.
Tomorrow comes, and then again, it goes,
And my ambition to become something more, grows and grows.
Around the corner, yet miles away,
The life I want now, gets closer each day.
All I've ever wanted was something to live for,
I don’t want to be this little person anymore.
I’ve been basing my life upon what others think,
I wish I could go back and redo everything, every time an eye would blink.
I've fought to become who I am and what I want to be,
I have to remind myself that one day, I will be free.
Free from the rules I followed as a child,
When everything was a game and life was so mild.
Now times have changed and I realize nothing is fair,
And sometimes it seems like nobody even cares.
It’s like no one pays attention to what I feel is best for me,
And what I think about the way some things should be.
I understand now, that I’m pretty much on my own,
And I know a lot of what I can do will never be known.
All the time, I think about everything I can’t say, what I have to keep in,
And by doing this, my thoughts only get more complicated and deepen.
Soon I hope to find out who I am, and what I am meant to become,
I want to know where I’m going, I don’t need to be reminded of where I came from.