There’s a golden glow that seeps into my house as the sun is setting, but it reveals all the grime that was muddled in on the floor. I try to clean, sweep and mop, to make the hardwood floors reflect the beaming light better, but now the rooms too bright and my eyes are having a hard time adjusting. I push myself into a shadow so I don’t have to deal with the discomfort of adjusting right away, but by the time the light is tolerable, the sky is already dark.
what if everyone leaves you?
no one loves you,
wait why do you care?
you're you're own person.
but what if you end up all alone,
you love these people,
and they make the emptiness go away.
your life is a series of different addictions.
to people. to foods. that one song.
drugs. edge off the pain. the ******* stress,
you're not controlling anything,
everyone thinks you're a **** up,
be louder. no that's annoying.
calm down, now you're too aloof,
how do i make him notice me?
he's all i think about now
but it's onto the next one
and now im kinda empty
my feeling of control,
feeling like i was moving towards my goals
only lasted a year.
i think this is the reason i can't believe
i have a grasp
it’s too easy to blank my state of mind
Instead of dealing with everything.
i really want to be free
i wonder what i'm really working towards
would it be easier to get on medication?
to feel so out of touch with myself?
i really don't want to be me
I was having a divine time
Until suddenly a tragedy
Brought on my worst travesty.
every year on this day,
children come to my home to play
they giggle but run away pale faced
as if they had just seen-
I’m excited for the entertainment
Why brood in disappointment?
And after so many October 31sts,
I’ve gathered a crowd of children who were cursed
We stay here now forever
And all scare the new ones together
If you come to play
You may die and stay
it's someone different
but if i don't open my eyes,
i can feel him.
i wake up alone.
but if i don't open my eyes
my heart doesn't have to break