I must beg your forgiveness up front for this verse.
I don't want to be ****** or rude or perverse,
but all over the world, things are going oh so wrong,
and it's due, in large part, to the President's ****!

Some leaders have brains and they lead with their mind.
Some lead from the heart and are thoughtful and kind.
But President Trump, he shall reign and shall rule.
Being led from below by his shriveled old tool.

You can tell by the way that Trump likes to abuse
women like they are objects to conquer and use.
Trump surely likes weapons, strongmen and dictators.
Trump labels all challengers liars and haters.

It is this sort of strutting, denial and attacking
that comes from a man who is seriously lacking
in confidence and a true manly demeanor,
and to compensate, Trump is obsessed with his wiener!

Now, I don't want to ridicule, criticize, heckle
the importance and worth of every man's schmekel,
but it's rather perverse and off base and quite sick,
when you turn off your brain and just follow your ****.

It just makes Trump so subject to manipulations
when he's flattered and aided by unfriendly nations.
Through his payoffs to hide his betrayals and ******,
Trump's Johnson has led him to such Stormy seas!

When he calls out Bill Clinton for his cheating ways,
the hypocrisy never shall cease to amaze!
All the cover-ups prove him a liar and a fake -
A pathetic, small slave to his small trouser snake.

Now I hope in your heart some forgiveness you'll find
for me planting these images into your mind.
And let us all hope that it will not be long
'til the world's ruled no more by the President's ****.

We've reached the end of year one
and Trump says he's done more
than any other president
from any time before.

So, what are the accomplishments
of Trump and his intrepid crew?
Well, here now is a partial list
of what they did, or tried to do.

They lied about inaugural crowds
and introduced "Alternative Facts",
inspired a worldwide women's march
to protest Trump's disgusting acts.

Hollowed-out the E.P.A.,
deemed climate change a Chinese hoax.
Paris Accord and regulations
gone, in puff of toxic smoke!

Wrecked the State Department and
Muslims, he said, must be banned.
Insulted NATO and U.N.,
brought shame upon his own homeland.

Attacked the mainstream media.
Railed and ranted of "fake news",
unless it came from Fox and Friends
and others spouting all his views.

Gave praise to Russia - Putin too.
Investigations started.
Comey started digging and
was forcibly departed.

Poked and taunted Kim Jong Un.
International drama!
Obsessed with slagging Hillary
and Barack Obama.

Battled healthcare, N.F.L.
and Planned Parenthood.
Tried to ban transgendered troops.
Claimed that coal is good.

Would not condemn the Neo-Nazis
down in Charlottesville.
Filled his swamp with sycophants
up on Capitol Hill.

Puerto Rico half destroyed.
Paper towels he gave.
Huge cuts to the National Parks,
decreasing land to save.

Claimed that Trump saved Christmas and
gave massive tax cut presents
to the corporate oligarchs
with crumbs tossed to the peasants.

Debt ballooning! Conflict looming!
Divisions far and wide!
G.O.P.'s not stopping Trump.
Have they even tried?

Claims to be a stable genius;
A smart and big success!
What legacy will Donald leave?
What awful, dreadful mess?

These were just some accomplishments
of which I have kept score,
but they just scratch the surface.
I could rant for hours more!

But haven't we all had enough
after Trump's first year?
It feels more like twenty!
Let us hope his end is near.

This was my Year One "trumpoem"
that I wrote for you.
Hope I won't have to write another
after year two!

Oh Donald Trump may be an angry, narcissistic fool;
A racist, a misogynist and all-round half-baked tool.
Upon his nation and the world, he represents a curse,
but all of that's okay, you see, for Hillary was worse!

Oh Hillary, she had mad cow and syphilis and rabies.
She drank the blood of virgins and she lived to dine on babies,
and from her eyes shot laser beams while on a broom she flew.
In every way she's crooked, for The Donald says it's true!

She once was witnessed soaking in a lava-filled hot tub,
where she was playing footsie with her pal, Beelzebub!
To the Gulf and Caribbean she released the hurricane.
She brings the earthquake, fire, plague, and drought and flooding rain!

Although she now is history, with influence no more,
we must all hate her while The Donald's failings we ignore.
So while Trump spews his hate and puts all progress in reverse,
we must embrace his evil ways... For Hillary was worse!

Behold the right-wing evangelicals.
A boisterous, worshipping horde.
Waving their Bibles and shouting out praise.
Personal friends with the Lord!

Have they read the Bible? Do they understand
the words and message within?
I'd have to say no, for they support Trump -
A ****** example of sin!

Does Trump follow Christ? Does he help the sick?
Does he sacrifice for the poor?
Is he on the side of the marginalized?
Does he do all he can to end war?

Does Trump preach forgiveness? Is he full of love?
Would he never cast the first stone?
Is he kind? Is he humble and gentle and wise?
His failings and sins does he own?

And yet all of these Christians who claim to be godly,
will give it all up in a flash.
To parrot Trump's hateful, divisive World view,
and shower him with praise and their cash!

On Old Testament tribalist hatred,
evangelicals strongly agree,
but to bolster their dogma, they've taken the Christ
and removed him from Christianity.

As a child, I was brought up religious,
but I soon learned it wasn't for me;
For when I see religious folks worshipping Trump,
I see nothing... but hypocrisy.

Sheriff Joe Arpaio was convicted by the court
for picking on the immigrants of the Latino sort.
Relied on racial profiling and on intimidation;
A redneck cop who'd love to build a bigoted white nation.

Of course, this man loves Donald Trump and though he is a crook,
Trump has come through and pardoned him and got him off the hook.
So ***** the courts and rule of law that's there to thwart each hater;
This "law and order" president's a despot and dictator.

So if you are an alt-right racist, it's your lucky day!
El Presidente Trump makes rights and justice go away.

When Donald Trump gets up to speak, you simply never know.
Will he seem sane or ludicrous? Just which way will he go?
Will he stick to the teleprompter, presidentially,
or rant his way to la-la land, lost in a fantasy?

Will he just share the facts and make his statement strong and clear,
or ramble, lie and shout and spread division, hate and fear?
When needed, he reads from the script, but looks like he's in pain.
He'd rather spout what's in his head, no matter how insane.

So when we all see ****** Trump, it's plain to see the fact,
that Presidential Trump is just an unconvincing act!

When Donald Trump opened the floodgates last year,
by basing his campaign on paranoid fear;
By embracing the zealots, the hawks, the alt-right,
he emboldened the racists to take up his fight.

When Donald Trump barks and belittles and bellows,
he ends up with strange and revolting bedfellows,
who think, 'cause they're white they can fight and can ****
which, with horror, we witnessed there in Charlottesville.

When Donald Trump won't quickly, strongly condemn
the racists and nazis, he's standing with them.
When he's vague, non-committal, or responds with delay,
he's disgusting, pathetic, and as worthless as they.

"Da Mooch", he was ******, was rude, and was loud.
As his spokesman, you'd think that would make Donald proud,
but he's suddenly dumped before we got to know him.
Yes, his job's been cut short... Just like this poem!

Johnny wants to be a soldier. Johnny had a *******.
Johnny now is Jenny and The Donald says it's wrong.
Jenny loves her country and she wants to serve and fight.
Trump says she's not worthy and no longer has the right.

Susie was born as a girl but knew she was a guy.
Susie now is Sammy and he only wants to fly.
Went to join the Air Force - Was rejected on the spot.
Knew that he was qualified, but Trump says that he's not.

Trump was born an ignoramus - still is one today.
Never served the military - always got his way.
If you're not the same as him you are the enemy.
You're not worthy if you're poor or a minority.

Started with transgendered, better watch out if you're gay.
Blacks, Hispanics, women, he would love to throw away.
When nobody's left the military will be grim.
Trump will have nobody left who wants to fight for him.

If you're an American and if you long to serve,
better not be different or they'll label you a perv.
If you say you're boy or girl and ready for your chance,
all that matters now is the equipment in your pants!

Oh Jefferson Beauregard Sessions,
being bullied by President Trump
You were loyal and true
as a lapdog, but you
have been thrown 'neath the bus like a chump.

So when Donald Trump asked you to fire
Mr. Mueller, you must have thought, "How"?
From that task you're excused,
being rightly recused
from the Russian mess playing out now.

So Trump's trying to shame and demean you,
saying that you're beleaguered and weak.
What a cowardly disgrace.
He won't say to your face
that "You're fired": Those words he won't speak?

Robert Mueller's team is closing in now,
with Trump's nuts in a vice - he can tell.
Trump won't show you the door
'cause we all know for sure,
it would make him look guilty as hell!

Understand, I don't like you Jeff Sessions,
with your racist past troubling and sad,
but I hope that you'll stay,
for I so love the way
that it's driving Trump stark raving mad!

Don Junior had a meeting with
Natalia Veselnitskaya
and he did not disclose this fact
or say what did transpire.

Paul and Jared were there too
but "nothing was discussed".
Don said the meeting ended
and turned out to be a bust.

The New York Times found out
and asked why Don did not report.
"But nothing happened" Junior claimed
when making his retort.

Then under pressure from the press
some emails he set free,
confirming Russian interest in
a Trump presidency.

His daddy claimed, "He's a good boy"
"He's new, green and naive".
But Manafort - He should have known
(one would like to believe).

But Junior's new transparency
turned out to be untrue...
It seems that a fifth person was
there in the meeting too!

A former Soviet officer
named Rinat Akhmetshin
was also at the meeting...
so why was he brought in?

And then we soon learned of a sixth...
a seventh... and then eight!
Tied to the oligarchs and
Russian governmental state.

What was the meeting all about?
Perhaps there's nothing to surmise.
The secrecy though, would suggest
it might be otherwise.

Don Junior had a meeting
that nobody disclosed.
Let's hope this helps fulfill the dream...
to see his dad deposed!

The FBI chief, Mr. Comey,
was loved by Trump like his best *****.
For he went around hintin'
about emails and Clinton,
making Trump fans excited and foamy.

But then Comey provided reflection
upon Trump aides and Russian connection.
Trump did protest and howl,
stamp his feet and cry foul,
for the tide has turned since the election.

Trump thinks Comey is guilty of slander,
though his Hillary probe raised no dander.
So I guess Trump's excuse
is what's good for the goose
simply does not apply to the gander!

So why Donald Trump am I hounding
through this verse and this poetic pounding?
It's Trump's hypocrisy
that so motivates me
and we're used to it!... That's what's astounding!

In West Virginia they dig tunnels or a great big hole,
to extricate from Mother Earth the substance known as coal.
For centuries the coal was burned and smoke would fill the air,
but coal became outmoded and demand's no longer there.

So many miners were laid off as mines did stall or close,
and in Coal Country incomes dropped and unemployment rose.
But Donald Trump made promises to fix the miners' strife,
by saying he'd bring Old King Coal a-roaring back to life.

So Trump reduced the regulations that bring jail or fines
for harm to the environment from power plants or mines.
But all this is irrelevant - Trump has no magic spell
to make the world want coal again. To whom will these mines sell?

Trump may as well have promised to bring back the horse and cart;
for tinkers, whalers, schooner sailors, a rich and brand new start.
For Trump will promise anything and sell his very soul.
Next Christmas his reward should be... a big old lump of coal.

Did you support that Donald Trump in his campaign last year?
Why didn't all his hatefulness fill you with dread and fear?
Did you believe his B.S. or did you hate Hillary
so much that you preferred a **** who likes to grab pu--y?

At some point did you realize the truth he cannot tell,
when he fibbed about inaugural crowds and voter fraud as well?
When he misled you on healthcare, did you finally agree
that lying just like breathing; both come to him naturally?

And what about his henchmen, tangled up with Russian ties
to the Kremlin and the oligarchs, in cahoots with Putin's spies?
When Trump heaped praise on Vladimir, were you just too blind to see,
or did you hope that your leader would be Comrade Trumpsky?

Oh how could this have happened? What an awful, global mess!
A big buffoon's in power, do you finally confess?
Did your vote help to elect him? To the Whitehouse was he sent
because in a fit of madness, you said "Trump for President"?!

'cause in a fit of madness, you said TRUMP-FOR-PRESIDENT?!

Donald Trump's unleashed a budget
with fanfare great and loud;
And if you helped elect him
you are, no doubt, standing proud.

Such joy and happiness you'll feel
and oh such special thrills,
to find yourself in bankruptcy
from rising healthcare bills.

With public education trashed,
most kids will come out fools,
but so glad for those richer kids
in better, private schools.

No more funding for the arts,
oh what a lovely treat,
to walk past starving artists out
panhandling on your street.

When you drink water from your tap
and start to gag and choke,
be grateful that the E.P.A.
has gone right up in smoke.

If you're old and your Medicaid
won't cover that prescription,
will "Proud to die before my time"
be on your grave's inscription?

So where will all the savings go
from all this cost reduction?
Be thrilled to know it will buy more
weapons of mass destruction;

and it will build a monument
to Trump, so we will see
a massive wall, so broad and tall,
as useless as is he.

Though into pain and suffering
your country will be slidin',
your vote for Trump has given you
a budget you'll take pride in.

Obama was the nicest guy - Intelligent and cool.
Comparatively speaking, his successor plays the fool.
Ridiculous and baseless tweets, The Donald can't avoid.
His recent missives indicate he's turning paranoid.

Barack Obama seems to be Trump's ongoing obsession.
Obama saved the U.S.A. from Bush-induced recession.
The Donald hates Barack's success and can't leave it alone,
and Trump, now "off the rails", claims Obama bugged his phone!

Trump's offered no supporting facts for his emphatic claim.
No warrants from the F.B.I. or C.I.A. to blame.
Perhaps he thinks Barack Obama has a super-power
that lets him fly high in the sky to break into Trump Tower.

So, do you wonder, Donald Trump, just where Barack is now?
Is he there behind the curtains? Is he in the walls somehow?
Is he watching from the ceiling? Is he in the chandelier?
Is he in your 15th closet? Do these thoughts fill you with fear?

Is he down at Mar-a-Lago, in the old groundskeeper's shed?
Is he disguised just like Melania, right there in your bed?
The truth may be much worse than that! Does it fill you with dread,
to realize Barack is living... deep inside your head?

In his address to Congress,
The Donald brazenly
revealed plans to spread fear through
a brand new agency.

It will report and list all crimes
by each new immigrant,
to heighten paranoia's spread
amongst the ignorant.

By fanning fiery flames of fear,
the bigots shall rejoice,
and they shall love the agency
that Trump is naming "VOICE".

Victims
Of
Immigration
Crime
Engage­ment

Now, I propose an agency
to give another choice,
that balances the propaganda
to be spread by VOICE...

An agency that recognizes
Donald's vile role
as chief hatemonger of the world.
It shall be named, "A$$HOLE".

American
Sociopathic
S*******
Harming­
Others
Less
Entitled

Donald Trump has frequently claimed
the mainstream media's got to be blamed
for always trying to make him lose
by spreading vicious, vile fake news.

So just a moment, we shall take,
to list some news that's surely fake.

The inaugural crowd was the biggest of all
(not according to photos that day on the mall).
Three million votes were cast fraudulently
(without any proof of such conspiracy).

The ****** rate's highest in 45 years
(but there are no crime stats supporting such fears).
Many terror attacks the press failed to report
(past coverage provides a convincing retort).

So Donald, it seems that the tack that you take
is, if news doesn't favor you, it must be fake.
Fake news does surround us, that much is so true.
Such a shame that so much of it's coming... from you!

The following poem is a generalization, on that, we can likely agree,
but this is the way that most Trumpists appear, to many a person like me:*


Dear Trumpists, I am here to say I think I understand
just what you're really all about across the troubled land.
It really bugs you, does it not, when walking in your town,
to see so many people with a skin of black or brown?

To hear a foreign language when the immigrants converse.
To see them in a headscarf or a turban makes you curse.
Their differences, their ways of life, you see as disrespect
and you hate being asked to be "politically correct".

Then one day came a savior shining brighter than the sun.
His name was Donald Trump and you knew he was the one.
You knew you must support him 'cause in every speech he'd give,
he'd validate your hate and he'd fit with your narrative.

"The Mexicans are rapists", "The Muslims seek to ****",
"Black lives don't matter quite so much". Such thoughts gave you a thrill.
Sometimes he was outrageous. You could not trust every word,
but vote for him you did because you felt you had been heard.

Well, now your man's in power and it's no longer fun,
with half his staff revolting (and that's in more ways than one).
He hasn't drained the swamp, it's just become further bogged down,
with all his slimy yes-men there to praise the orange clown.

He comes across as ignorant and looking like a fool.
He's subject to fact-checking and resulting ridicule.
The press, it has a field day and comedians rejoice.
His opponents have united and have found a common voice.

Dear Trumpists, I do understand that this has made you mad,
but sense and reason don't support the notions that you've had.
So you rant on social media with foul, insulting fits,
like a bunch of whining, shouting, howling, idiotic twits.

So Trumpists, don't you realize, your chance has passed you see?
Oppression has been in decline since the end of slavery.
So here's a new idea that I'd really like to share:
You might try something different by showing that you care.

Why don't you go extend a hand to those that you attack.
They might provide you insight that you desperately lack.
Just open up your heart and head and throw away the hate,
and America once more could be a nation that is great.

How sad for you, Ivanka dear,
the world can be so mean.
You toil so hard both night and day
there at your sewing machine.

To bring the world such wondrous joy
of shoes and bags and fashion
but big, bad Nordstrom came along
and stomped upon your passion.

You seem kind and intelligent
but folks won't buy your stuff,
'cause you support your daddy
and of him, they've had enough.

Ivanka, we all understand
that you must love your dad.
But narcissistic greed and power
have driven him quite mad.

So please Ivanka, intervene.
Enable him no more.
Just let us know you disagree
and step back, we implore.

If you and Jared do what's right,
then you we will adore,
and you may find, your product line
will be back in the store!

Oh Donny and Arnie got into a battle,
begun by The Donald who started to prattle
on something so urgent... important... momentous,
which is: Arnie's ratings on this year's "Apprentice".

So Arnie said, "Trump - What's your priority,
a show you produce or the presidency?"
Then Donny said, "I'll show you how much I care"
as he made a dog's breakfast by hijacking prayer.

So Arnie said, "Donny, you ignorant *****,
when it comes to careers, perhaps we should switch.
You take on the ratings as job number one,
while I sit in the Oval and get something done!"

Of course, this whole thing's a ridiculous act
on the part of The Donald, so he can distract
all of us and the press and the whole internet
from the seemingly fascist agenda he's set.

So let's make a vow not to speak of this stuff,
and let us not heed this celebrity fluff.
Let's not make muckraking the thing that we do...
But now I have realized... I've just done it too!

Trump, he seems to make a point of stirring up the ***.
He makes outrageous statements, thus making tempers hot.
He seems to like upsetting people so they shout or cry.
It all seems so unnecessary, so I'd ask him, WHY?

These last few days he hurried out an immigration ban,
without due consultation that would craft a solid plan.
He could have sought out some advice - something that he should try,
but he believes he knows it all, which makes no sense. So, WHY?

His words and actions seem to make him look like a buffoon;
a caricature cut out from some political cartoon.
If he'd provide a reason through intelligent reply,
there'd be no need to scratch our heads and keep on asking, WHY?

He seems to hate minorities and some religious groups.
This brings about division and rallies all the troops.
This could lead to a new world war where millions would die.
Where does he think he's taking us and, more important, WHY?

WHY doesn't he just take a moment so he can explain?
WHY can't he simply tell the truth and say what's in his brain?
WHY can't he and his followers be glad for what they've got?
Explain... Be kind... Be strong... Be smart. For heaven's sake, WHY NOT?

Donald Trump has slammed the door
on families that had to flee
from zealots who perverted faith
and turned them into refugees.

He made a list of seven lands
where free will's treated as a sin.
Their people flee to squalid camps
until a new land lets them in.

But Donald Trump has made it clear;
he hates on basis of belief.
He's stoking ignorance and fear,
inspiring terrorism's grief.

These refugees have nothing left
but hope and will to work so hard
to build a free and better life,
but now they've been locked out and barred.

What of the Muslims in the states
who patriotically defended
the land whose leader now spews hate?
Is all their hope and love now ended?

Someday, if karma catches Trump,
he'll lose it all and have to flee.
Let him experience, first-hand,
the tears of the refugee.

Trump's targeted the EPA,
an agency that's in the way
of rich polluters everywhere
who foul the water, land and air.

Employees there may no more tweet.
With journalists, they may not meet.
No external communication.
No Facebook use across the nation.

For issues such as climate change
don't fit the script that Trump's arranged.
Oil wells and pipelines he has planned,
to snake across the hinterland.

He wants to dig and burn the coal.
He doesn't care. He has no soul.
He showers his troupe of alt-right *******
with platitudes and promised riches.

Oh what a sad and tragic day
when Trump destroyed the EPA.

Snowflake is a word that the trumpists will use
to describe those of us who have different views.
They say we're entitled, they say that we whine,
they say give Trump a chance and we'll all be just fine.

They claim that we snowflakes are spreading fake news,
and cannot accept, when a battle we lose.
They say snowflakes get angry each time we don't win.
They claim we have tantrums and very thin skin.

Let them call us all snowflakes, and reason will show
that the number one snowflake... is someone we know!

I went to the womens' march here in my town,
full of women and men who won't be trodden down,
in support of my wife and of my daughter too,
I said, "I am proud to be marching with you".

Misogynist insults aren't made by real men,
but you, Donald, keep hurling them time and again.
When you grab them, insult them, rate them with a number,
you wake up a great mass of outrage from slumber.

Since you just think a woman is something to *****,
does it bother you knowing a woman birthed you?

Mine eyes hath seen the horror of the rise of Donald Trump.
Mine ears hath heard his vitriol he spews from on the stump.
If you believed his ramblings, he took you for a chump.
His "truth's" near always wrong.

Lordy, lordy did he fool ya?
With his con job did he school ya?
Now you'll have to let him rule ya.
Now that your chance has gone.

He swept past sixteen wannabes and claimed the G.O.P.
Surrounded now by sycophants, and yes-men who'll agree
with whatever harmful, hateful, hurtful law that he'll decree.
His ego marches on

Sorry, sorry, such an awful lesson learned.
By protest through the ballot box, the whole world has been burned.
A tyrant's come to power, with the facts and truth adjourned.
His tyranny goes on.

But I say there is hope my friend to right this wrong, you see.
Will you rise in righteous protest and recite this rhyme with me?
And let it help remind you of the past when you were free.
With hope, we shall move on!

Glory, glory when we weather this dark storm,
glory for us once again, when love becomes the norm.
When we have ousted ignorance in every evil form.
And truth goes marching on.

A tweet sent out at three A.M.
Another misspelled rant,
with sketchy claims so full of blame,
your trumpists, you enchant.

So little thought before you type,
no need to check or vet
your message with the experts
or with your own cabinet.

You cannot stop nor help yourself,
because you are no quitter.
Like some half-wit, having a fit.
The greatest twit on Twitter.

So they hacked some computers.
"No big deal" you may say,
"Since their influence steered things
toward the right way"

"They just didn't respect us,
that's why the attack.
So I place all the blame
on the Dems and Barack"

"So we'll get nice and cozy,
Vladimir and me,
since there is just so much
upon which we agree"

"We want to be strongmen
who'll shape history
and we're both such examples
of virility"

"And we'll handle the media
through fear and attack
to ensure truth and balance
shall never come back"

"Admiration and power
is what we adore,
it's the one greatest cause
that we truly live for"

So, Mr. Trump...

When you're there in the Oval
and Europe's alarmed
'cause in Prague and in Warsaw.
the Russians, well armed,

have crossed o'er the borders
and come to reclaim
their former domininons,
then who will you blame?

So why this great bromance?
What's your motivation?
Why would you align
with Vlad and his nation?

Could it be business ties?
Or maybe high debt?
Or maybe dark secrets
you wish they'd forget?

I do not want to think
that it could be such things
but the Russians sure look
like they're pulling your strings.

Lock her up! Lock her up! Lock her up!
Your campaign crowds so chanted.
You took it in and smugly smiled
while they all railed and ranted.

But lock her up for what? I thought.
She's been investigated.
For alleged conflict of interest,
she has been exculpated.

So if such accusations,
when even proved untrue,
provide sufficient grounds for jail.
They'll have to lock up... You!

Your trumpists whoop and shout "hooray"
You talked a lot but talk is cheap
It's your inauguration day
and now you've promises to keep

You must ***** that border wall
or did you change that to a fence?
So wide, so deep and very tall
or were your promises nonsense?

And as for Clinton - Lock her up?
Or did you change your mind?
"Conflicting interests" you once said.
Such crimes in you they'd never find!

Will you deport each and every
undocumented immigrant?
When did you start backpedalling
from that initial angry rant?

And then there are the Muslim folk,
such a convenient bogeyman.
Will they all have to register
while you drop bombs on their homeland?

You said outsourcing steals jobs.
Let tariffs ease that trouble.
But how'll you soothe the working poor
when Walmart's prices double?

But know this, Donald, you have friends
to help with troubleshootin'.
Will you get cosy in that bed
with your dear comrade Putin?

The swamp you promised you would drain,
did it improve or worsen?
How will your bootlick billionaires
assist the average person?

And may we see at long, long last,
your tax returns today?
The ones you promised to release
but changed your mind along the way.

How will you handle, Mr. Trump,
these questions you must face?
The pressure's on you starting now
Lets hope you don't fall in disgrace.

So many promises you made
up to Inauguration day
But please don't keep them - they're so wrong
and such a price we all would pay.

Oh Kellyanne Conway, when she interacts
with the press, she presents the alternative facts.
The alternative facts, the alternative facts,
Oh my! How I love the alternative facts!

The moon is a cube and it's made out of wood.
The ocean's on fire, and broccoli tastes good.
The inaugural crowd was 12 million strong,
and liberty, life and equality's wrong.

The penguins are all busy making Swiss cheese
and poverty's ended whenever you sneeze.
The Donald shall reign o'er the world without end
and Vladimir Putin is our greatest friend.

Cyanide is nutritious and ice cream is hot.
The *** may be black but the kettle is not.
When night falls the sun gets sealed in a can,
and Trump is a kind, loving, wonderful man.

The alternative facts, the alternative facts,
dear God how I love the alternative facts.
To let tyranny rise through unspeakable acts,
let us live to embrace the alternative facts.