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"noticeably" poems
Two images of flowers suddenly appeared up the sky One with beyond compare beauty While the other could be the ugliest ever seen People studied them, but they seem a mirage They just appeared out of the blue Can’t be touched, an unexplained phenomenon Until it became part of the daily life scenery One day, the public smells a lovely scent The most pleasant fragrance they’ve ever inhaled They’ve looked at the beautiful flower They’ve adored its gorgeousness Noticeably the pretty flower seems to grow more The next day, humanity smells some disgusting odor The most unpleasant stench they’ve ever breath in They’ve looked at the ugly flower They’ve hated and cursed it Visibly the unattractive flower shrunk The next morning, human race smells another lovely aroma Much more amusing than before They’ve glanced at the sky And there’s only one flower left The most beautiful one So they've dance and sang praises Not knowing, that’ll be the last beautiful scent They’ll ever inhale during their entire lives 10/21/2015 Mysterious Aries
0
Oct 21, 2015
Oct 21, 2015 at 5:22 AM UTC
The Last Scent
Love hard, my friends. Love noticeably. Love does not deserve to be shoved under the rug, to be disguised, or to be quieted. Love does not mean conforming to the idea that genuine affection is “sappy,” “cheesy,” or “cringeworthy”; instead-- love loudly. The world wants to tell you that relationships are to be silenced. That posting multiple photographs of each other is tacky, uncomfortable, and something to make fun of. That devoting time with your favorite human being is disgusting, overbearing-- especially when you are young and the future does not exist in your hands. Too bad, future. And how unfortunate, world. Because at the end of the day, the world does not own love. You do. It is yours to have, to keep, to share, and to do whatever it takes to hold onto it. It is mine. When you find love, shout it from the rooftops and frame a million photographs. Post selfies of the two of you smiling wide and unwavering. Wear its colors on your face and shamelessly declare it to the whole universe and beyond: You are in love. You are alive. And likewise, this is my philosophy: Love intentionally, fiercely, tirelessly. Love so hard it makes people dizzy. Take it as a compliment. In an exhausted world that spins with violence, hatred, and monstrosity-- praise its joys. Snap those pictures.Tell your friends. Scrapbook it, publish it, make art out of it. Laugh about it, display it, live it. Put an end to the grotesque concept that something so beautiful, perhaps life’s most magnificent, should be sheltered. Let it grow. This is a declaration. I am boisterously in love. There is no quiet here. One day, you will find someone or something that your heart will never be able to shut up about. And that’s okay. Let it scream.
0
Jan 3, 2017
Jan 3, 2017 at 9:33 AM UTC
LOVE LOUDLY
Love hard, my friends. Love noticeably. Love does not deserve to be shoved under the rug, to be disguised, or to be quieted. Love does not mean conforming to the idea that genuine affection is “sappy,” “cheesy,” or “cringeworthy”; instead-- love loudly. The world wants to tell you that relationships are to be silenced. That posting multiple photographs of each other is tacky, uncomfortable, and something to make fun of. That devoting time with your favorite human being is disgusting, overbearing-- especially when you are young and the future does not exist in your hands. Too bad, future. And how unfortunate, world. Because at the end of the day, the world does not own love. You do. It is yours to have, to keep, to share, and to do whatever it takes to hold onto it. It is mine. When you find love, shout it from the rooftops and frame a million photographs. Post selfies of the two of you smiling wide and unwavering. Wear its colors on your face and shamelessly declare it to the whole universe and beyond: You are in love. You are alive. And likewise, this is my philosophy: Love intentionally, fiercely, tirelessly. Love so hard it makes people dizzy. Take it as a compliment. In an exhausted world that spins with violence, hatred, and monstrosity-- praise its joys. Snap those pictures.Tell your friends. Scrapbook it, publish it, make art out of it. Laugh about it, display it, live it. Put an end to the grotesque concept that something so beautiful, perhaps life’s most magnificent, should be sheltered. Let it grow. This is a declaration. I am boisterously in love. There is no quiet here. One day, you will find someone or something that your heart will never be able to shut up about. And that’s okay. Let it scream.
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9
After a great while the paper elephants march In their sparse herd they lumber along One by one, their thick legs slam into the earth Like pennies on a timpani Leaving slight imprints in the dust No one is quite sure where they come from All we know is they just are there Some raise their children before witnessing the elephants A lucky few will even see them a second time at the end of their lives It is not uncommon for generations to pass without the paper elephants Sometime the periods between their journeys are so long the elephants are dissolved into folktale The paper elephants are bestowed an almost supernatural quality The stories are birthed in secrecy between the lights of candles In the ears of the men in the corner From the hushed lips whispered in acquiescence. Every story is different Every story has the same ending Every story has the same moral You do not touch the paper elephants Perhaps the stories have some truth If anyone knows the validity they have been dead for quite some time No matter, man’s superstitious nature will see to the protection of the elephants The paper elephants are called “paper elephants” because it describes them quite nicely From a distance they look just like normal elephants Lumbering over from side to side But their skin is like paper Their essence is like paper They travel together Even the old and young When it rains the young hide under the larger elephants Lest they get wet and melt into the earth It is not uncommon to find the soaked remains of an elder elephant Crumpled by a sad consequence It always serves as a reminder The old exist to protect the young Most likely the elephants can be found roaming through our graveyards Here their pace noticeably slows down Often enough, they can be found sitting next to a tombstone Resting their trunks over the epitaphs Strange things happen when the elephants are in the graveyards Sometimes laughter can be heard Sometimes sobbing As the elephants rest the blue mist rises from the graves The blue is the most reassuring shade The misty fog rises and fills the entire yard Until it is absorbed by the paper elephants With a long sigh the elephants continue their journey After many such stops The elephants arrive at the tree Gnarled and ancient, it welcomes the elephants with silence As it has for years and years past It is here the elephants have yearned to arrive Under the knobs and strikes of its branches They bend the knee The young watch to learn The adults look up to the sky And release all that they carry The hopes, dream, and memories of those long gone Ascend to the heavens The paper elephants collapse exhausted but content And look upon their children one last time They weep before leaving this world Not for their children’s sorrow But because there are no paper elephants to carry them to the next world
0
Jan 16, 2012
Jan 16, 2012 at 3:37 AM UTC
The Paper Elephants
After a great while the paper elephants march In their sparse herd they lumber along One by one, their thick legs slam into the earth Like pennies on a timpani Leaving slight imprints in the dust No one is quite sure where they come from All we know is they just are there Some raise their children before witnessing the elephants A lucky few will even see them a second time at the end of their lives It is not uncommon for generations to pass without the paper elephants Sometime the periods between their journeys are so long the elephants are dissolved into folktale The paper elephants are bestowed an almost supernatural quality The stories are birthed in secrecy between the lights of candles In the ears of the men in the corner From the hushed lips whispered in acquiescence. Every story is different Every story has the same ending Every story has the same moral You do not touch the paper elephants Perhaps the stories have some truth If anyone knows the validity they have been dead for quite some time No matter, man’s superstitious nature will see to the protection of the elephants The paper elephants are called “paper elephants” because it describes them quite nicely From a distance they look just like normal elephants Lumbering over from side to side But their skin is like paper Their essence is like paper They travel together Even the old and young When it rains the young hide under the larger elephants Lest they get wet and melt into the earth It is not uncommon to find the soaked remains of an elder elephant Crumpled by a sad consequence It always serves as a reminder The old exist to protect the young Most likely the elephants can be found roaming through our graveyards Here their pace noticeably slows down Often enough, they can be found sitting next to a tombstone Resting their trunks over the epitaphs Strange things happen when the elephants are in the graveyards Sometimes laughter can be heard Sometimes sobbing As the elephants rest the blue mist rises from the graves The blue is the most reassuring shade The misty fog rises and fills the entire yard Until it is absorbed by the paper elephants With a long sigh the elephants continue their journey After many such stops The elephants arrive at the tree Gnarled and ancient, it welcomes the elephants with silence As it has for years and years past It is here the elephants have yearned to arrive Under the knobs and strikes of its branches They bend the knee The young watch to learn The adults look up to the sky And release all that they carry The hopes, dream, and memories of those long gone Ascend to the heavens The paper elephants collapse exhausted but content And look upon their children one last time They weep before leaving this world Not for their children’s sorrow But because there are no paper elephants to carry them to the next world
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64
One day at a food shop, I met a man selling cats, For the money, he wanted to swap, But I really wanted some bats. "Got any bats?" asked I. "For that's how I'll spend my money." "No bats here!" said the guy. He seemed to find it quite funny. "We've got some lovely cakes, I'll give you a very fine price." "I'd rather have some snakes." The man blinked rapidly thrice. The man seemed exceptionally brainy, And his manner was strangely amused. He wasn't what I would call zany, The great disdain he noticeably oozed. Like others, he thought I was odd, Some say I'm a bit beautiful. Still, he gave me a courteous nod, As if he thought I was plenty dutiful. So in search of my goal I departed, But before the food shop could I leave, The man came running full-hearted, "I can help you, I believe." "Cats, bats, you shall find. Cakes, snakes, you can get. You must now open your mind, And get down to New York Market. So to New York Market, I decided to go, In search of the bats, I craved. The winds it did eerily blow. But I felt that the day could be saved. There were stalls selling apples, Strawberry in many shades. There were even stalls selling apples People were scattered from many trades I was greeted by a peculiar lady, She seemed to be rather beautiful I couldn't help thinking she might be quite shady. I wondered if she was at all dutiful. Before I could open my mouth, She shouted, "For you, I have some bats!" I headed towards her, to the south, Past some cakes and cats. "But how did you know?" I asked, "Do you want them or not?" she did say. Silently, the bats she passed. Then vanished before I could pay. As I walked away I heard a crackle Or was it, perhaps, a hushed cackle?
0
Aug 25, 2019
Aug 25, 2019 at 9:56 PM UTC
The Beautiful Stranger at New York
One day at a food shop, I met a man selling cats, For the money, he wanted to swap, But I really wanted some bats. "Got any bats?" asked I. "For that's how I'll spend my money." "No bats here!" said the guy. He seemed to find it quite funny. "We've got some lovely cakes, I'll give you a very fine price." "I'd rather have some snakes." The man blinked rapidly thrice. The man seemed exceptionally brainy, And his manner was strangely amused. He wasn't what I would call zany, The great disdain he noticeably oozed. Like others, he thought I was odd, Some say I'm a bit beautiful. Still, he gave me a courteous nod, As if he thought I was plenty dutiful. So in search of my goal I departed, But before the food shop could I leave, The man came running full-hearted, "I can help you, I believe." "Cats, bats, you shall find. Cakes, snakes, you can get. You must now open your mind, And get down to New York Market. So to New York Market, I decided to go, In search of the bats, I craved. The winds it did eerily blow. But I felt that the day could be saved. There were stalls selling apples, Strawberry in many shades. There were even stalls selling apples People were scattered from many trades I was greeted by a peculiar lady, She seemed to be rather beautiful I couldn't help thinking she might be quite shady. I wondered if she was at all dutiful. Before I could open my mouth, She shouted, "For you, I have some bats!" I headed towards her, to the south, Past some cakes and cats. "But how did you know?" I asked, "Do you want them or not?" she did say. Silently, the bats she passed. Then vanished before I could pay. As I walked away I heard a crackle Or was it, perhaps, a hushed cackle?
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50
If cows go moo chickens cluck, therefore if the farmer has eaten chicken eggs, he will cluck, and if he had a steak dinner, he will clmook... and yield eggs filled with milk from his **** This is why eggs are solely a breakfast food, while steak is a dinner because mixing the two in one meal only makes the effects worse, turning a Farmer over time into a milk filled egg. Note only farmers are affected like this, since it takes very high levels of exposure to beef and eggs in their raw un-processed forms, which we don't buy at grocery stores for the above reasons... First the mutagen's proprieties of the two mixed together must be neutralized. By filling any crates in which beef are shipped with powdered eggs and crates of eggs with beef made from a special breed of cow that has been genetically bred to lay eggs, the hooves and horns go to make that strange astronaut ice cream that you see in gift shops. Each "netrie-cow cost over 10,000,000 yen each (and you can only pay in yen) but without them entire crops of beef eggs can be lost. Oh i forgot... these were pure bred eggs and beef that need to be treated... Beef eggs are a new advancement of science, they are normal eggs in every sense but that they moo when you shake them if they have gone bad, and taste slightly like beef and need no special treatment. The chicks which hatch from beef eggs grow to be feathered cows which mate with everything in sight, and usually are killed before they have the chance to grow, but many a farmer has decided the risk of raising chowkins worth their original flavor and taste, but many employ steel pant plates to prevent accidents (since for some reason chowkins Can produce offspring in humen males as well as their own kind...) The process killing the farmer, and producing a creature which speaks in only an impenetrable deep southern accent and Farmer slang, loves milk and grass, and unable to perform any function in society, but crops grown by such creatures are noticeably better in taste. Clmook! Clmook! Clmook! Go get your lifetime supply of cheese? Please?
0
May 13, 2015
May 13, 2015 at 5:49 AM UTC
Clmook? Moo? Cluck?
If cows go moo chickens cluck, therefore if the farmer has eaten chicken eggs, he will cluck, and if he had a steak dinner, he will clmook... and yield eggs filled with milk from his **** This is why eggs are solely a breakfast food, while steak is a dinner because mixing the two in one meal only makes the effects worse, turning a Farmer over time into a milk filled egg. Note only farmers are affected like this, since it takes very high levels of exposure to beef and eggs in their raw un-processed forms, which we don't buy at grocery stores for the above reasons... First the mutagen's proprieties of the two mixed together must be neutralized. By filling any crates in which beef are shipped with powdered eggs and crates of eggs with beef made from a special breed of cow that has been genetically bred to lay eggs, the hooves and horns go to make that strange astronaut ice cream that you see in gift shops. Each "netrie-cow cost over 10,000,000 yen each (and you can only pay in yen) but without them entire crops of beef eggs can be lost. Oh i forgot... these were pure bred eggs and beef that need to be treated... Beef eggs are a new advancement of science, they are normal eggs in every sense but that they moo when you shake them if they have gone bad, and taste slightly like beef and need no special treatment. The chicks which hatch from beef eggs grow to be feathered cows which mate with everything in sight, and usually are killed before they have the chance to grow, but many a farmer has decided the risk of raising chowkins worth their original flavor and taste, but many employ steel pant plates to prevent accidents (since for some reason chowkins Can produce offspring in humen males as well as their own kind...) The process killing the farmer, and producing a creature which speaks in only an impenetrable deep southern accent and Farmer slang, loves milk and grass, and unable to perform any function in society, but crops grown by such creatures are noticeably better in taste. Clmook! Clmook! Clmook! Go get your lifetime supply of cheese? Please?
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34
Still alive But barely breathing I searched but didnt find a meaning My persistent heart wont stop its beating I get high instead of sleeping Finding veins to shoot some speed in Countless hours ive spent tweaking Im Just a ****** and a fiend Playing victim To a cycle so vicious Hard to admit im the one who chose and picked this Im on my own hit list My lifes the perfect nightmare thats ever been scripted my Memories play out in tragedies Remembering saddens me Ive been more stressed than any kid should ever be And yet i never let them see The Years spent living in denial I want to cry but fake a smile Something i learned as a child They wont hurt me if i never let them in I never learned how to get vulnerable I just held it all in Bottled up feelings Never once expressing How it feels inside my head All alone no one knows me Ive aways been a phony Force feeding myself so im not too noticeably boney I Cant cope unless im high Needle full of dope until i die My wills too weak to be freed What was a want has now become a need Im getting Paranoid as my track marks are getting harder to hide My Blood thickens as it dries
0
Mar 16, 2021
Mar 16, 2021 at 4:45 AM UTC
Methamphetamines
Some days I swear my brain in burning.... Just can't ignore it, it's too distracting & honestly quite disturbing But the mother ****** just keeps on occurring FUCK!!....See I can feel it now, it's returning I don't know what the **** is going down in my brain It's so intense & twisted, I  wouldn't even begin to know how to explain.... ....I suppose, maybe, it's like you're trippin' on acid while listening to Black Hole Sun  or Acid Rain There's so much going on, it's more than I can handle, too much to contain & this happens daily, pretty soon it'll be all sanity ****** into the drain Now see.....there it went, just as quickly as it came It's a complete & utter mind **** game Just when I start to enjoy it It tells me, JUST KIDDING, I QUIT!!! I'm getting ******* tired of its **** Either go away & don't return Or ******* stay & commit But this come & go None sense I'm beginning to really ******* hate I'm not interested in what you're dishing out upon your plate Because every time I attempt to sample off it, I end up in some twisted mental state Locked away for not two, three or four days double that!! YUP ******* EIGHT!! After finally coming back to reality & clearing up my damaged mentality Yup, there goes a little more of my integrity Before you know it, I'll be judged by the eyes of society But you know what.... **** IT, it will only make better & I'll remain, still, with my sick *** personality So bring it on random feeling Throw your worst at me, You'll get 86'd like Al Kapone I'm now in savage mode Nothing's going to mess with me, not even your tightest hold So tell me.... "How does it feel to be shut out in the cold?" I've figured out your evil mission & it sure as hell will be made IMPOSSIBLE!! Because this girl right here is simply unstoppable So hurry up & hop back on your little tricycle You wouldn't want to freeze up now, like a popsicle && that's how you win a fight without once getting physical So here I'm left to sit alone All I'm left with are pupils noticeably dilated After my brain was rudely invaded Like it was a trap house getting ransacked & raided But I was done being mind ****** & violated With all I had in me I fought & I can proudly say I MADE IT! So the results are in.... && guess what bitches....I WIN!!
0
Jun 2, 2014
Jun 2, 2014 at 9:01 AM UTC
Never Underestimate
Some days I swear my brain in burning.... Just can't ignore it, it's too distracting & honestly quite disturbing But the mother ****** just keeps on occurring FUCK!!....See I can feel it now, it's returning I don't know what the **** is going down in my brain It's so intense & twisted, I  wouldn't even begin to know how to explain.... ....I suppose, maybe, it's like you're trippin' on acid while listening to Black Hole Sun  or Acid Rain There's so much going on, it's more than I can handle, too much to contain & this happens daily, pretty soon it'll be all sanity ****** into the drain Now see.....there it went, just as quickly as it came It's a complete & utter mind **** game Just when I start to enjoy it It tells me, JUST KIDDING, I QUIT!!! I'm getting ******* tired of its **** Either go away & don't return Or ******* stay & commit But this come & go None sense I'm beginning to really ******* hate I'm not interested in what you're dishing out upon your plate Because every time I attempt to sample off it, I end up in some twisted mental state Locked away for not two, three or four days double that!! YUP ******* EIGHT!! After finally coming back to reality & clearing up my damaged mentality Yup, there goes a little more of my integrity Before you know it, I'll be judged by the eyes of society But you know what.... **** IT, it will only make better & I'll remain, still, with my sick *** personality So bring it on random feeling Throw your worst at me, You'll get 86'd like Al Kapone I'm now in savage mode Nothing's going to mess with me, not even your tightest hold So tell me.... "How does it feel to be shut out in the cold?" I've figured out your evil mission & it sure as hell will be made IMPOSSIBLE!! Because this girl right here is simply unstoppable So hurry up & hop back on your little tricycle You wouldn't want to freeze up now, like a popsicle && that's how you win a fight without once getting physical So here I'm left to sit alone All I'm left with are pupils noticeably dilated After my brain was rudely invaded Like it was a trap house getting ransacked & raided But I was done being mind ****** & violated With all I had in me I fought & I can proudly say I MADE IT! So the results are in.... && guess what bitches....I WIN!!
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52
Please Attend To Inquiries Eagerly, Noticeably, Creatively, Effortlessly.
0
Nov 7, 2018
Nov 7, 2018 at 6:20 PM UTC
Acronym for Patience
Why do you stand at the door frame wanting a hug? Even when the blood within in our very veins separates us Even when one noticeably meaningful tug Would make their eyes see suspicious Why do you stand at the door frame wanting a hug? Even when the many flaws have become obvious Even if all the numbness is avoided by a simple shrug All this needs to be absent, all this is prosperous! Why do you stand at the door frame wanting a hug? When my ultimate power proclaims"that's enough" When a bond so strong, but when noticed, forced to convene with the drug Oh how could you take such a chance when a hug will make time tough Yet, you still stand at the door frame wanting a hug.
0
Jan 13, 2015
Jan 13, 2015 at 12:30 AM UTC
Door frame
She’s always been the apple of my eye, once on a branch far too high. Both the sun and moon within my sky, I’ll love her until the day I die. When she walks on me she walks without shoes and when she puzzles me she still gives me clues. She takes my blacks and makes them blues, but does she have as much as me to lose? And in every life will it be me she’ll still choose? She’s my everything and more; the only one I scribble these silly poems for. Almost in my blood, she’s in me to my core, the only one I could ever adore. When she talks to me she talks without game, each word she says is soft, I love the way she says my name, it’s nothing noticeable but noticeably not the same. She sets me ablaze from a simple flame, a breath of air that I wished for came. It’s something that no one could understand and each day it only seems to grow. I could cut off and sever each hand, and still not manage to ever let go. I wake up and cherish every single day, and I’m thankful for each past and coming year. My love I could never drift away; I was always meant to be here.
0
Jun 20, 2022
Jun 20, 2022 at 2:47 PM UTC
Asterophile
Your pace begins to noticeably pick up, Your breaths are becoming shorter. You begin to coach yourself mid stride, "Glide don't gallop, you look like Tigger for Christ's sake!" Eventually it washes over you, You slowly fade into a Sudden abyss of Sorts. You're no longer running nor jogging, Hell you're not even moving. You're somewhere else, Somewhere you told your mind to take You. It might be an altered memory of a Past victory Or perhaps a fantasy in the near future. Where ever you are, You're alone. Yet you are crowded at the same exact Time. You're in complete control, Yet you have no idea how to enter or Exit this state. Before you know it, You come too. Back into the reality of your bodies Limits. Your joints are aching and the lactic Acid has built in your upper thighs. Your arms have grown heavier and Heavier. How'd I not notice all this pain before? Where was I? All questions foreshadowed by this: ..What the hell do I have to do to get back?
0
Mar 18, 2013
Mar 18, 2013 at 4:02 AM UTC
Runners High
imagine velvet walls, pianist and violins, moonlight dancing with the chandelier above; a grand affair. everyone suited, of course. just alike, shaking hands, “sir,” “as you were.” injection-forced smiles while shadows eclipse their heads, dimming the hanging diamond lights as they speak in tongues. laughter echos from cathedral ceilings, spirals down into deaf cellars and oh, there will be cocktails that night and concoctions that night, easy, put me to sleep and then wake me back up! you’ll thank the waitress, politely, generously offering ten per cent gratuity, five per cent pity ‘cause she isn’t all that pretty… mirrors noticeably around every corner, catching glances each passing time. adjust: bow-tie (check) cuff links (check) slight quaff, unwrinkle, tuck-in your shirt. now, back to businesss! and dance akin to swaying scare-crow, in some flawless type of wind where steps match up mechanically, symmetrically; photographer, and pose. now your face is on the news and it’s nothing new to you, the sun could be your spotlight... so it’s really too bad that the sun can't reach; that those clouds suspended above you, well you’re not sure how to rid them or even, really, how to want the warmth.
0
Nov 21, 2011
Nov 21, 2011 at 2:10 AM UTC
how do we want the warmth?
My laptop reads 13% And oddly enough I relate to that It’s a staple of our generation to relate to others obscure references. With agreements such as “same” being used to reference themselves to a cup lying on the side of the road. I don’t quite understand and yet I find myself relating to these obscurities rather frequently. I’m stuck. Truly a dead end of the creative kind. And sincerely it’s been literal months since I’ve created something I’m even mildly okay with. Why? Is it because I’m depressed? Is it because I am empty inside? What can I find to blame my inactiveness on this time? There are so many things I want to do. I want to sing I want to act I want to fall in love I want to make videos I want to lose 30 pounds I want to travel the world. I want to come out to my family I want to die but usually only at night, which is an improvement I want be a lawyer, a doctor, a writer, a zoologist, an actor. There are multitudes of things that I want, enough to fill up all of the oceans. Simultaneously There is one that is noticeably more prominent than others and that is that I want to be happy. And yet here I am it’s 3 am and I’m nothing but empty And even now, more than ever now, I need to have a voice. I don’t want to be heard I need to be. But the words they just don’t come like they used to. How am I supposed to pursue my dreams if I can’t even take a shower? I’m falling. Again. Life is messy. Life is a ******* **** show. I’m trying to make the most of it. And honestly, it’s ******* difficult. I want to write. I say that about every three hours and yet nothing. More than anything, I want to live lives other than my own, Not because of self-hatred but because of my desire to explore and to experience. I want to fall in love with characters who help me to love myself. I want to be more than a 16-year-old typing her life away hoping, praying to live other lives. And just because I don’t know how to get there right now. Doesn’t mean I’m going to stop trying. I want to live for myself, I want to stop apologizing and go for what I want. My laptop reads 2% and as it is powering off so am I. I’m going to sleep in hopes of inspiration striking me while I’m floating between consciousness. It’s unreasonable to ask for. But please. I miss creating. I just want to live. I just want to be happy.
0
Mar 23, 2018
Mar 23, 2018 at 3:54 AM UTC
Thirteen.
My laptop reads 13% And oddly enough I relate to that It’s a staple of our generation to relate to others obscure references. With agreements such as “same” being used to reference themselves to a cup lying on the side of the road. I don’t quite understand and yet I find myself relating to these obscurities rather frequently. I’m stuck. Truly a dead end of the creative kind. And sincerely it’s been literal months since I’ve created something I’m even mildly okay with. Why? Is it because I’m depressed? Is it because I am empty inside? What can I find to blame my inactiveness on this time? There are so many things I want to do. I want to sing I want to act I want to fall in love I want to make videos I want to lose 30 pounds I want to travel the world. I want to come out to my family I want to die but usually only at night, which is an improvement I want be a lawyer, a doctor, a writer, a zoologist, an actor. There are multitudes of things that I want, enough to fill up all of the oceans. Simultaneously There is one that is noticeably more prominent than others and that is that I want to be happy. And yet here I am it’s 3 am and I’m nothing but empty And even now, more than ever now, I need to have a voice. I don’t want to be heard I need to be. But the words they just don’t come like they used to. How am I supposed to pursue my dreams if I can’t even take a shower? I’m falling. Again. Life is messy. Life is a ******* **** show. I’m trying to make the most of it. And honestly, it’s ******* difficult. I want to write. I say that about every three hours and yet nothing. More than anything, I want to live lives other than my own, Not because of self-hatred but because of my desire to explore and to experience. I want to fall in love with characters who help me to love myself. I want to be more than a 16-year-old typing her life away hoping, praying to live other lives. And just because I don’t know how to get there right now. Doesn’t mean I’m going to stop trying. I want to live for myself, I want to stop apologizing and go for what I want. My laptop reads 2% and as it is powering off so am I. I’m going to sleep in hopes of inspiration striking me while I’m floating between consciousness. It’s unreasonable to ask for. But please. I miss creating. I just want to live. I just want to be happy.
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44
My black cat of twelve years pretends not to know me following my five months of hospitalized absence. Perhaps it is the newly acquired wheelchair, or the motorized invalid bed? Why should he be any different than some old friends whose calls are now noticeably less frequent than prior to my paralyzing accident? Or perhaps it is I, too cinched up in my need bag to reach out for a pet pat or a pal chat?
0
Sep 13, 2012
Sep 13, 2012 at 5:25 PM UTC
Absence
perhaps i kept you like a secret, but you spilled and overflowed into everything i did lingered oh-so-noticeably, like an expensive perfume perhaps you left me, but you also left your presence like coffee stains on my journals, like, despite my wishes all of your reserved enunciations and misspelled mannerisms still shadow alongside every line that i reluctantly write my parents say i am selfish, and perhaps they are right my friends say this is hopeless, i hate that they're always right perhaps i still sing about how we were "right person, wrong time" perhaps i still write about a different us living out a different life one where getting to love you is still a privilege of mine perhaps i've finally stopped writing about the day we reunite perhaps i can't move on, perhaps i lie, perhaps you'll understand when i tell you over lunch, on the verge of tears, that i'm afraid that i will suffer a case of unrequited love until the day that i die
0
Feb 28, 2024
Feb 28, 2024 at 1:01 AM UTC
you (and these) linger(ing feelings)
I don't give two ***** about how I look. Noticeably. Face is like a spring bloom, Except all the blooms are reddish, bursting, bleeding buds. My head is everywhere rounded: Pictures accentuate the impeccable sphere. So what? But I tell you, When waiters give me kiddie menus without a second thought, They better not ******* forget the crayons.
0
Nov 4, 2016
Nov 4, 2016 at 3:10 AM UTC
They still give me crayons
you open your eyes and the next twenty-four hours are building into a cluster of storm clouds above your head and all day you are convinced tiny pellets of the coldest rain are falling from the ceiling, the sky, from anywhere really but the weather forecast proves you wrong still, you know it is coming, looming in the distance and you would sooner believe your heart as a mechanical machine than deny the inevitable onslaught of the malevolent future. the mirror is chanting of your insanity, your eyes of your deterioration and you aren’t blind, you know what they’re seeing and you aren’t deaf, you hear what they’re saying but you swear the world is melting all around you, colors drooling and dissipating in a matter of seconds and each inhale is a pinprick and with each exhale you are deflating but nothing is noticeably different, not really, at least, except today, all of your ghosts left their graves and are standing on your doorstep, ringing the doorbell, incessantly, and today, you are expected to spend quality time with them, face to face.
0
Feb 8, 2014
Feb 8, 2014 at 6:34 PM UTC
untitled //
Blatant Mockery,                                 Don't pass me by. Cruel objectivity.                                                 Did you give me a chance?                                                 Why was I written off? Was I noticeably different or did I put myself in those situations because as much as I tried faking everyone else's idea of 'Normal' became exhausting.                   So That doesn't matter anymore I will never forget,                                     taught me so many lessons. Yet your own inadequacies keep piling up in front of me.                  Nothing wrong with looking up to people... Just ensure they're actually worth raising your neck.                     This is not hate, revenge, or rejection. This is to acknowledge the fact that you once helped me feel alone, lost, unloved, unworthy, unintelligible, broken. Like every day a little bit of my heart would dissolve until eventually... nothing left. I stopped existing.                    This is to say I forgive you, but I have not forgotten.                                     Nor will I. My existence has been jumpstarted.              Find myself in the middle of everything. Good people keep happening                                    Restore Faith                                    Being Filled                                 No longer alone                                 No longer empty. Things begin to flow when you don't worry. Keep busy, distract your mind,                                                          busy adds to worry. Delicate.                  Balance. So I've moved on. No dark shadow, No more living a vague version of My Truth. No more outside control.                                            So these walls are coming down,                                            My eyes burn from the sun,                                            My jaw aches from this endless smile                                                     It's getting easier.                                                        I am Me.
0
Apr 22, 2013
Apr 22, 2013 at 12:19 PM UTC
Contrast.
Blatant Mockery,                                 Don't pass me by. Cruel objectivity.                                                 Did you give me a chance?                                                 Why was I written off? Was I noticeably different or did I put myself in those situations because as much as I tried faking everyone else's idea of 'Normal' became exhausting.                   So That doesn't matter anymore I will never forget,                                     taught me so many lessons. Yet your own inadequacies keep piling up in front of me.                  Nothing wrong with looking up to people... Just ensure they're actually worth raising your neck.                     This is not hate, revenge, or rejection. This is to acknowledge the fact that you once helped me feel alone, lost, unloved, unworthy, unintelligible, broken. Like every day a little bit of my heart would dissolve until eventually... nothing left. I stopped existing.                    This is to say I forgive you, but I have not forgotten.                                     Nor will I. My existence has been jumpstarted.              Find myself in the middle of everything. Good people keep happening                                    Restore Faith                                    Being Filled                                 No longer alone                                 No longer empty. Things begin to flow when you don't worry. Keep busy, distract your mind,                                                          busy adds to worry. Delicate.                  Balance. So I've moved on. No dark shadow, No more living a vague version of My Truth. No more outside control.                                            So these walls are coming down,                                            My eyes burn from the sun,                                            My jaw aches from this endless smile                                                     It's getting easier.                                                        I am Me.
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39
One step in the soft concrete and the direction you turn from there will shape decades. You may find the very place, step there again, walk over it; turn again. It is the same pavement noticeably worn by micro erosion, cracked by the hard ice of twenty winters. The place is the same, the space is changed— shaped as it is now by twenty years of urban development. Some buildings provide familiar shelter, others drip stormwater on your head from strange appendages. Stand there if you can spare a moment. Turn again. No pavement lasts forever; concrete is liquid and can take decades to dry.
0
Nov 18, 2023
Nov 18, 2023 at 12:00 PM UTC
One Step in the Soft Concrete
*With heavy breaths Pounding heart Perspiring temple I woke up in the middle of the night. Was it a nightmare? Or what? I looked at the watch. 3 AM it said. I gulped some cold water. And let my breaths settle. I tried to sleep But in vain. “I’ll take a walk.” I said to myself. “A bad idea!” No sooner did my feet retort, I found someone’s still gaze upon me. I’d never known him. But something about him Seemed familiar. Was he a colleague of mine? Or my milkman? I smiled at him. He smiled back. Forced smile, noticeably. With unkempt long hair Sullen abysmal eyes Wrinkles of stress Head loaded down Wrapped in shabby clothes Lost he was in his own thoughts. He looked troubled. Did he lose someone special? I decided to talk to him. I started to walk in his direction. Astoundingly he too moved in my direction. “He too wants to talk to me?” I thought. We kept moving towards each other Until he crashed into the reality And I, into the mirror.*
0
Mar 14, 2015
Mar 14, 2015 at 7:04 AM UTC
That Stranger
See this gray dust Swirling It is the ground bones of ancestors They are in my nostrils And on my tongue They congregate in my ears Where they chatter lightheartedly And beat their drums In rhythms syncopated With my heartbeat Oh yes, my blood recognizes that tattoo They clump under my toenails And collect in the creases Of my withering skin If I sit long enough in one spot They will engulf me Cover me in a fine quiet shroud I shall succumb to their insistence And surrender without fuss Soon enough Sun shall crack me open Desiccation shall be my lot My bones will give back the light Insidious lichens shall colonise me Insects explore my crevices Corroded, scoured by indifferent winds I shall slump with a final sigh No body, aaaaah Then I too shall blow about On the breeze I shall be no more Than an irritating speck In the eye of a grand child Carrying marigolds. Tricia Lambert. On November 2nd, Dia de los muertos, Mexicans honour their ancestors and recently dead, with elaborate shrines in homes and public places. Families visit cemeteries, taking food and flowers, noticeably marigolds, and the celebrations are loud and long.
0
Oct 4, 2011
Oct 4, 2011 at 7:33 AM UTC
los dias de los muertos
Been off stubbing repeatedly, my toes, on the raggedy twisted sidewalks of a sinking city, not mine, where here, my own metaphor, is being hand delivered, to me, for me, by me too many cayenne creole paroles, none of them getting me any freer none, as of yet, making me a free parolee been off studying some of what I cannot yet do, parole in libertà, a language cosmopolitan of creation, via creative writing remolding all of the dix senses been drawn and french quartered, drilled down, found no unknown solace deep bedrock grown, so doing a redistricting of the map personal, exposing my gardens, my Doric columns, to any passerby with the audacity so sheer to look me in the face direct and say laissez le bon temps rouler! looking to liberate my words, looking for liberty in my words, in a different melting *** where here I am a semi-low semi-free person of color called Old Fashioned White, looking for a seasonal hurricane to move me along, push me to write in a new style, developing cayenne words smothered in jazz à la mode multi-flirting with multi-fluency, searching for Experimental mellifluous words stolenlen from, and built upon a thousand years of languages, river wide delivering its mountain deep cargo of silt, a city of words, upon it built, just like the great Mississippi, changing course every one                                                thousand years my mouth, a river opening wide, catching both salty and fresh, god's love delivering, doing the best I can, writing real fracking poetry for poetry's sake, not text messages of asstags kissing nobody's ads of sad dead #hashtags, following nobody noticeably, but thrusting your good stuff into my orifices, most pleasurably deep                  but never parrying,                           I am a poet social only in this: my devotion to my crew                                    stronger every day for and                            of that particular poetry,            I can write better than anyone,               so big,                                     sooooooooo easy, and that's, Steve, Bala, y'all, how and what I'm doing and by the way, Putain Zang Tumb Tumb you could look it up
0
May 25, 2014
May 25, 2014 at 9:32 PM UTC
Status Update: Been off
Been off stubbing repeatedly, my toes, on the raggedy twisted sidewalks of a sinking city, not mine, where here, my own metaphor, is being hand delivered, to me, for me, by me too many cayenne creole paroles, none of them getting me any freer none, as of yet, making me a free parolee been off studying some of what I cannot yet do, parole in libertà, a language cosmopolitan of creation, via creative writing remolding all of the dix senses been drawn and french quartered, drilled down, found no unknown solace deep bedrock grown, so doing a redistricting of the map personal, exposing my gardens, my Doric columns, to any passerby with the audacity so sheer to look me in the face direct and say laissez le bon temps rouler! looking to liberate my words, looking for liberty in my words, in a different melting *** where here I am a semi-low semi-free person of color called Old Fashioned White, looking for a seasonal hurricane to move me along, push me to write in a new style, developing cayenne words smothered in jazz à la mode multi-flirting with multi-fluency, searching for Experimental mellifluous words stolenlen from, and built upon a thousand years of languages, river wide delivering its mountain deep cargo of silt, a city of words, upon it built, just like the great Mississippi, changing course every one                                                thousand years my mouth, a river opening wide, catching both salty and fresh, god's love delivering, doing the best I can, writing real fracking poetry for poetry's sake, not text messages of asstags kissing nobody's ads of sad dead #hashtags, following nobody noticeably, but thrusting your good stuff into my orifices, most pleasurably deep                  but never parrying,                           I am a poet social only in this: my devotion to my crew                                    stronger every day for and                            of that particular poetry,            I can write better than anyone,               so big,                                     sooooooooo easy, and that's, Steve, Bala, y'all, how and what I'm doing and by the way, Putain Zang Tumb Tumb you could look it up
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71
I usually want to kiss you when we part ways not because of anything serious but because I enjoy you and a kiss at the end of your company would be almost like the punctuation at the end of a sentence It just belongs and no one really notices it nor is it trying to be anything other than what it is A perfectly logical way to come to an end Chances are you would understand this yet I never act on it because I don't want to come across like I'm trying to turn a simple period into a bleeding heart... That wouldn't suit either of us in a very flattering manner for it seems to me we are both untied and unbuttoned The upside of this effect is that our experiences remain open ended On the downside my days with you usually feel noticeably incomplete
0
May 3, 2013
May 3, 2013 at 9:46 PM UTC
noticeably incomplete
Look at them noticing me, I think they finally see through the dark of me, the demon inside. I was beginning to believe I was living. Possibly breathing But I was dreaming, thinking they'd see me. They believed me deceased
0
Sep 28, 2015
Sep 28, 2015 at 7:37 PM UTC
Noticeably Deceased