"deflate" poems
Am I the only one that has their demons feasting upon their souls?
They say it is easy to tie a noose around your mind,
To overcome the urges and temptations of ending your life with a suicide
They don't know the true pain and torment that is going on in my head
An epic battle that leaves me with restless nights in bed
"End your life already" they say, as they prey on me during my weakest hours
Sometimes I give into the voices, carrying the sharp blade to my wrist
Crying as I struggle to mutter three powerful words that keeps me going
Choking on my sobs, my lungs deflate with a desire to say that God loves me
I try to convince myself that God is trying to test my faith
And to just wait, wait and wait
Then my Demons will eventually go AWAY.....
~Imperfect Desire **
Mar 4, 2015
Mar 4, 2015 at 7:33 PM UTC
Damaged people are dangerous because they know how to survive,
And if you've never been damaged you don't know how it feels to be alive,
See struggle is the sauce that gives success its flavour,
when life kicked you down it was doing you a favour.
Cos it's in your darkest hour, not in prosperity
that you will realise your true ability.
Life dunks you in deep waters not to drown you but to cleanse you.
And that's just the beginning of what it will put you through.
But it's chiselling you down, you won't deflate.
It's not wearing you thin, it's getting you to your fighting weight.
Prosperity makes monsters, adversity makes men.
I believe when you reach the top life will yank you back down again.
You didn't break down, you just had a flat tyre
so get back up and relight that fire.
keep it burning and churning at the pit of your heart
and keep on learning and yearning and never fall apart.
Stare life in the eyes
and say "no matter how many times
my spirit won't break if my drive never dies"
So throw me a burden I won't lose my composure,
It's for this very reason that life gave me shoulders.
Get better not bitter
This weather will wither
I'll turn wounds into wisdom
sadness into spirit
tears to tenacity
I will never quit it
Take a deep breath and concentrate your stare
because a road with no obstacles never took you anywhere.
Oct 26, 2012
Oct 26, 2012 at 6:40 AM UTC
Dodge cars and **** self confidence
Go round and **** compliments
Incompetence of divine providence
Confess but stay anonymous
To helmets that give fake safety
Say they deliver you safely
To something that kills when i taste thee
Vindictive to past
But past is obdurate
Killing a cause that i cant its innate
Grows to inflate
Changes this fate
Or cant its to late
Loose weight
Deflate
Bend back to stay straight
Drift far to relate
So ill **** your self confidence
You- theres everything wrong with it
**** and never be the same as since
Cry but be silent
Flinch but don't wince
And dodge cars while i can
I got hit
Every time that i ran
But still run
When i wish
I could sit
Know that i won't
But still pray to be hit
So ill **** your self confidence
And
Dodge cars while i can
Apr 24, 2013
Apr 24, 2013 at 4:24 PM UTC
*I ponder of something great
My lungs will fill and then deflate
They fill with fire
Exhale desire
I know it's dire
My time today
I have these thoughts
So often I ought
To replace that slot
With what I once bought
'Cause somebody stole
My car radio
And now I just sit in silence
Sometimes quiet is violent
I find it hard to hide it
My pride is no longer inside
It's on my sleeve
My skin will scream
Reminding me of
Who I killed inside my dream
I hate this car that I'm driving
There's no hiding for me
I'm forced to deal with what I feel
There is no distraction to mask what is real
I could pull the steering wheel
I have these thoughts
So often I ought
To replace that slot
With what I once bought
'Cause somebody stole
My car radio
And now I just sit in silence
I ponder of something terrifying
'Cause this time there's no sound to hide behind
I find over the course of our human existence
One thing consists of consistence
And it's that we're all battling fear
Oh dear, I don't know if we know why we're here
Oh my,
Too deep
Please stop thinking
I liked it better when my car had sound
There are things we can do
But from the things that work there are only two
And from the two that we choose to do
Peace will win
And fear will lose
There's faith and there's sleep
We need to pick one please because
Faith is to be awake
And to be awake is for us to think
And for us to think is to be alive
And I will try with every rhyme
To come across like I am dying
To let you know you need to try to think
I have these thoughts
So often I ought
To replace that slot
With what I once bought
'Cause somebody stole
My car radio
And now I just sit in silence
I ponder of something great
My lungs will fill and then deflate
They fill with fire
Exhale desire
I know it's dire
My time today
I have these thoughts
So often I ought
To replace that slot
With what I once bought
'Cause somebody stole
My car radio
And now I just sit in silence*
Aug 25, 2014
Aug 25, 2014 at 10:13 PM UTC
Sometimes it hurts so much not to cry when you have to hold it inside you and it hurts so much to be in a crowed room
and you have to hold it in because if she sees you
crying she'll know it's because she stomped on your chest
and caused your heart to deflate like a lazy balloon and
in that moment you feel so alone and
empty
and so you start to cry.
And everyone consoles you and pats you on the back and tells you it'll be okay
but this isn't what you wanted
it wasn't supposed to happen like this
"no no no leave me alone
just stop
I'm fine I have allergies jesus."
And crying doesn't fit your aesthetic,
emotion doesn't fit your aesthetic,
love doesn't fit your aesthetic. So you get your **** together.
You go to the bathroom and you wash your face and you get your **** together and you fix your makeup
because runny mascara does not fit your aesthetic
and neither does
heartbreak.
Nov 16, 2014
Nov 16, 2014 at 4:45 PM UTC
They float these pink balloons
Strings hanging down, they
Sway back and forth like
Leaves in the wind.
Weighted down never to reach
Beyond their moment, never to
Fly free, these pink balloons,
Swaying in the wind.
Scuffing across the floor, neither
gravity keeps them grounded, or
These pink balloons never to
Let this hanging moment soar.
I have many pretty balloons, my
Favorate is pink, pink is the colour
Of flesh, a beautiful tone. One
I like to cut and bleed, as they hang
There slowly strangled floating on air.
What will take them, floating along
Scuffing feet plead for the ground,
But I like to pierce the flesh, like a
Balloon life does deflate slowly
Then gone as if never there.
I have many balloons suspended, some
Stagnant still, while others twitch.
Floating just above life, gliding
Closer to death as they hang upon
String neither here or there.
Mar 15, 2015
Mar 15, 2015 at 10:56 AM UTC
To have them shipped across the sea,
sitting like ornamental drops
tinsel strung around your eyes
pocketed the tree
walking down sunset avenue
reeking of bamboo stalks and water chestnuts
looking for a place to submerge your treasure
with a rattling breath do you deflate
And the Oak trunk that grows unimpeded
hanging her branches
caressing the Spaniard shingles
the clay missionary tabs
touching the stucco with a golden blade
of sunlight
cutting a thousand little strips
to hang about the face
moving a thousand miles a second
stopped in place with the quiet repose
of a yoga state
humming and shimmering
yet let me be sweet oak tree.
And I wander through the canyon boulevard
between the rocky cliffs and the endless riff
of surf-rock echoed off skate parks
and riding the PC
highway hair bedraggled and snaked into next week
lingering bonfire on the cotton shirt
plant for plant
*** for tat
seed to breed
Now dance, you and me.
Insinuation
drooling salivary tongue full
bacon
pigging out on burgers
getting red-eyes from vegans
smoking plants
murderers
We squirt,
relish on the act of dying
all things dying
choking life second by second
dying to live.
Staring at neon fins lining the gravel lot
Koi flickering beneath the celestial night
Suspended pondwater
pondering
In surfce tension
the deep mysteries of life
Tracing the snake through the winding streams
we watch atop the rooftop
Gaia
Taking in the burgeoning
Ocean of incandescent tangerine
and Peyote-light
Cacti hidden somewhere between
the quiet slumber of mindless streets
aligned by formless hands
Drinking the mescaline
air
Twisting the nightly moments
as locks of hair
I curled them, slipping, within my fingertips
tracing the long winding road of Tao
along her shoulders
Enraptured by her sensual bliss
When I finally drifted along the clouded memories
of divine rumbling eyes
she disappeared into the sky
blinking along the Jet turbines
Never meant to be mine
for more than a night
Aug 7, 2018
Aug 7, 2018 at 12:25 AM UTC
What saddens me horribly,
is that we spend too much time tangling ourselves up in our own insecurities.
Looping it around our throats and strangling our souls.
Maybe we need to start carrying around a mental knife...
Start cutting ourselves free before it’s too late.
The slow and painful process of watching a beautiful persons heart deflate from the negative needles that they turn on themselves, is becoming too common and too difficult to see.
Please, know that you're loved,
that you're unique,
that you're beautiful and smart.
Know that you're worthy of kindness.
Especially from yourself.
-Sincerely, A Stranger
Feb 6, 2017
Feb 6, 2017 at 11:25 AM UTC
My neck noosed
My legs loosed
I witness the tragic
It seems so emphatic
I feel entropy
Enter me
Centering
Around love and pain
I wear gloves of shame
Toxicity taints touch
My reaction is to cautiously recoil
For I feel a great punch
When I expect them to be loyal
A tear rolls down my cheek
Navigating scars
Like a man who is meek
Navigating bars
It starts and stops
Then keeps going
The tears drop
From what I'm knowing
That my time is evaporating
Dealing with the exasperating
I feel I can be caring
I just need the chance
We'll see how I'm fairing
On the end of your lance
Penetrating deeply
The pain is unceasing
Like a thousand bee stings
While you stand there feasting
Making me feel alive
From the pain inside
I guess things could always be worse
Sometimes that feels like a curse
Because I have problems all the same
But it's true
The sum of our troubles equal this game
That we lose
Even though I'd rather deal with *** and silence
Than to be vexed by violence
They're all just ways of imposing our will
Whether it's through who we birth or ****
Conflict is how we get our fill
Every day a different fire drill
We hate each other
We date each other
We underrate each other
To deflate each other
Pain is used as a tool
Until blood lays in a pool
These things that annoy us
Are met by avoidance
These things compound
Until I can't be unwound
I live in a world of contending intentions
It's a world of our own selfish invention
A world that burns bright
So I can't sleep
When day turns to night
I hear death creep
Seeking to take me from a life I never asked for
But I'm grateful to have
Life is about experimenting with opening doors
And I'm stuck in the lab
Feb 18, 2018
Feb 18, 2018 at 9:22 PM UTC
I should be thinking about you
but I am thinking
about inevitabilities.
Like how my dog's life will end before mine.
And how my heart isn't even beating half the time.
Maybe it would be better to relax our grip.
take our eyes from the sky
feel the string slip
There's biology and there's sociology and there's
plenty
of other people out there, man.
and
We'll pop
either way
or deflate
someday.
Sep 18, 2014
Sep 18, 2014 at 10:48 PM UTC
They deflated the ball
They had no problem catching it at all
They kept one inflated to kick
Cheating lost them their draft pick.
Why did you have to cheat?
You still wouldn't of faced defeat
Second time cheating since spy-gate
Now, you have deflate-gate
Jan 22, 2015
Jan 22, 2015 at 8:21 AM UTC
I like balloons
And I hope one day I ride a hot air balloon
Why?
Because when I see them
They remind me of people;
How they keep everything inside them for so long and when they can't take it anymore, they pop.
How they bring joy.
How they don't know they do.
How with the right air, they can fly up the sky and be free.
Yes they may pop or deflate but if you see them as people, they won't if they don't want to.
I like balloons because I want to fly;
Give joy
I want to escape the hurt, the pain, the exhaustion.
I want to be free
Jan 29, 2015
Jan 29, 2015 at 3:57 PM UTC
The most luminous example of a fallen angel
An ignored history.. A need for attention..
We define The Humanity Problem globally..
Let me enter the mind of a killer
Let me learn from within the mind of a saint
I will calculate the sociology
The norms killing our psychology
With pad and pen as my everlasting friend..
I want to burn in hells
I seek to bask in heavens
Show me the soul in my eyes
Weathering through a common storm..
People will find the real normal..
If they love themselves and help others..
It should be an oddity to erase normality
And so it exists only as a common standard..
That is how I grew up..
What if we ended expectations?
What if we embraced change?
Compassion could be a global comeback..
There is a nature in duality..
Humans engraved into double-edged swords..
If we could create love and war..
We may be able to end our battles..
We could live with evidence and compassion..
Ending our need to be beautiful, better or rich
As an American.. I am built of guilt
I suffer..
I displayed kindness, love and compassion
I valued evidence over assumption
Pointed out an economy of overconsumption
Only to be labeled as..
'Sheep'
'Idealistic'
So.. to my fellow kinsmen and women..
Open up a dictionary..
If I am a sheep..
We as a whole are not shephards..
Who do you look for to guide you?
Isn't America obviously lost?
We are defined as sheep by a globe called Earth
Currently? Like it or not.. They're right..
I am not powerful
I am weak
Despite the ego of America.. I am no sherpah..
I am no sheep..
I will never be a shephard..
I will only ever be me..
Think of you when at your happiest..
Revel in the lessons of how that was stolen..
It will be Hell..
I'll be blunt with that fact..
Want peace? Face it.
Face you.
Deflate all of your ego.
We need to bring back who we were long ago..
We need to care and foster Hope..
Eradicate foolish hate..
Value intelligence and knowledge..
Divided we are destined to **** and die..
But.. United?
We could be a beacon of hope..
A beacon brighter than God, who we're under
An American Beauty..
That has shed her mistakes..
To let go..
Of her American Ego..
Mar 10, 2021
Mar 10, 2021 at 2:23 AM UTC
.
Fazzy moams on wivvel crusts
carry jazms on flocked pavs.
Rinkulled witty over sark
unburcoaled plinks of bloo.
Serry nark are they cronking
and fillipas grapples in kloque.
Verx on spappled gurns are they
torting through gattering weems.
Fernol wend the schism klone
Glolling fast in clutty pawk.
Scenty flox drozzle by teas
Nisting on cowt rinnalled dawn.
Yurish casts of nash pigoon
stoz over hinty-hanty bynum.
When in merdeen lemp quimsy
dilly noff flyx and wempwarble.
For loofin under korots mingle
At the imtem tong fallop.
Shoozy bales of cremp deflate
and gwample rooks the plisties.
©Pagan Paul (22/06/16)
Mar 8, 2017
Mar 8, 2017 at 7:45 PM UTC
I ponder of something great
My lungs will fill and then deflate
They fill with fire, exhale desire
I know it's dire my time today
I have these thoughts, so often I ought
To replace that slot with what I once bought
'Cause somebody stole my car radio
And now I just sit in silence
Sometimes quiet is violent
I find it hard to hide it
My pride is no longer inside
It's on my sleeve
My skin will scream reminding me of
Who I killed inside my dream
I hate this car that I'm driving
There's no hiding for me
I'm forced to deal with what I feel
There is no distraction to mask what is real
I could pull the steering wheel
I have these thoughts, so often I ought
To replace that slot with what I once bought
'Cause somebody stole my car radio
And now I just sit in silence
I ponder of something terrifying
'Cause this time there's no sound to hide behind
I find over the course of our human existence
One thing consists of consistence
And it's that we're all battling fear
Oh dear, I don't know if we know why we're here
Oh my, too deep, please stop thinking
I liked it better when my car had sound
There are things we can do
But from the things that work there are only two
And from the two that we choose to do
Peace will win and fear will lose
It is faith and there's sleep
We need to pick one please because
Faith is to be awake
And to be awake is for us to think
And for us to think is to be alive
And I will try with every rhyme
To come across like I am dying
To let you know you need to try to think
I have these thoughts, so often I ought
To replace that slot with what I once bought
'Cause somebody stole my car radio
And now I just sit in silence
I ponder of something great
My lungs will fill and then deflate
They fill with fire, exhale desire
I know it's dire my time today
I have these thoughts, so often I ought
To replace that slot with what I once bought
'Cause somebody stole my car radio
And now I just sit in silence
Nov 15, 2016
Nov 15, 2016 at 1:38 PM UTC
Now you're breathing champagne
I can feel it sparkle on my skin
while you revel in the falseness
of forgivable sin
Now I can feel the air around you
deflate and search for words
to stop your own from hemorrhaging
and to heal whatever hurts
Now you're breathing champagne
while you stumble to the places you once called home
like the park behind my house
and the west end record store
Now you can feel the world behind you
nipping at your heels
like the hundred hungry hounds
and the weapons they conceal
Now you're breathing champagne
like it's oxygen
and you are
lost at sea.
I wrote a note on the bottom of the bottle
you can read when you're in pain
"keep the memories in your chest
and keep breathing champagne."
Mar 20, 2014
Mar 20, 2014 at 6:51 PM UTC
As my lungs crinkle and deflate into themselves,
I'm reminded that breathing is easy
I just **** at it.
I hear Lou Dog bark- good dog- and hope he's still out there, biting pornstars because for sure, not all Rastafarian dogs go to heaven. The music's down here.
But you're just the most boring cliche with a pretty face.
And I'm still surprised you're on this side of the dirt.
What a conscience you have.
(Huh?)
Jul 3, 2016
Jul 3, 2016 at 2:18 AM UTC
These Great Reviver’s wild reforms
Now sound like all Hot Air,
Narendra Modi’s new India
Still bogged down in despair.
Shinzo Abe’s revised Japan
Still wallows to stagnate
And China’s Xi Jinping’s grand scheme
Continues to deflate.
Collectively they stumble
In their plans to stimulate
Asia’s great economies…..
But have failed to shut the gate
On the Shadow Banking industry,
Their vague structural reform
And the fossilized grey politics
Which resemble, now, the norm.
Rhetoric is their keynote here
Real action’s in decline
With their mandate clearly squandered
There’s A BIG CRASH DOWN THE LINE!
M.
Auckland
23 August 2014
Aug 22, 2014
Aug 22, 2014 at 8:24 PM UTC
On a spring day, Emelia soared through the field, like a baby robin learning to fly, running in diagonals with her hands brushing against every shrub and leaf she saw.
Mud drenched pink overalls
and a bright blonde bowl cut.
She ran like a bumble bee on a mission
to pick the freshest, prettiest flower.
Stepping over bugs and playing tag with chipmunks,
she giggled uncontrollably and was a friend to all that walked nature's green carpet, tripping over wild, wispy grasses.
She looks up with innocent eyes, beaming like two sunflowers,
"We have to share," she announced to the big tree
that resembled Grandmother Willow.
She had just seen Pocahontas for the first time
and wanted nothing more than to become a color of the wind.
The wind blew the leaves in a nodding fashion,
showing agreeance to the young sprites statement.
She whipped and whirled her arms toward the sun
as it danced on her skin through the branches of her friends.
"I want to do this forever," she squealed.
So, she did.
20 years later, the girl grew
But with a dimmer light
Weaker legs
And a hole in her chest.
On a cold night, Emelia staggered through the barren field, fueled by a magic dust that made her feel like a crashing plane
Running in diagonals with her hands
Brushing against her watery eyes, keeping them from flooding.
Mud drenched ripped jeans
and a long, shaggy haircut mirroring the bark on the trees.
She ran like she was being chased by a vicious monster
trying to find the safest space for her to vent after feeling her brain bleed from her nose and heart deflate in its cage.
Stumbling over broken bottles and playing tag with her inner demons, she was a slave to all that walked nature's casket, tripping over roots and graves, smashing against a tree.
She looks up with innocent eyes, welling with painful tears,
"We have to share," she whispered to the big tree
that resembled Grandmother Willow.
She felt an unbearable pain that no one should live with and wanted nothing more than to be numb.
The wind stopped in it tracks, the leaves stagnant on their branches, showing heart wrenching dismay to the old skeleton's statement.
She sobbed and heaved with her arms wrapped tight to her torso
as her skin danced with her shuttering bones and tightening muscles.
"I don't want to do this forever," she helplessly breathed.
But, she did.
Jan 2, 2019
Jan 2, 2019 at 12:39 PM UTC
Finding peace in this life
Takes effort and strain
Feelings of hopelessness
Lead to the place
That it is kept
In a clearing, beneath the sky
Far away from the city
The gravestones
The gravel’s edge
Left behind
And the sun warms your skin
As the rain clouds gather
Dust swirling in anticipation
Plugging your nose
Despite the lovely smell
Your lungs deflate
Reconciled
That is peace
Apr 18, 2010
Apr 18, 2010 at 1:57 PM UTC
air bubbles float with ocean foam
each time my breath escapes
my lungs deflate
my vision shakes
body sinking
suffocating
i try to survive off of air bubbles
because it's all i have left
Jan 27, 2022
Jan 27, 2022 at 10:36 PM UTC
I woke ahead of the morning,
for reasons I hardly know.
I clad myself in fancy clothes
but for reasons I hardly know.
I put on a tie - attempted a knot
but failed as I waste more time.
I look at my clock, I look at my watch,
Wonder why it did not chime.
I gulp a steaming cup of espresso,
a shot of adrenaline pumped briskly,
I took my phone, dashed out quickly,
I then forgot my keys.
Found them seep in between the couch,
I had to sweat it out.
Crumpled shirt and an unbalanced tie
I foresee a morning shout.
I ignore a typical Monday dusk,
as I put on my cotton socks,
Slipped my toes into my brogues,
I took one last look at the clock.
I still had time, it is still early,
Perhaps a cigarette before I drive,
I lit one up, minty inhale,
the sun has started to rise.
I rushed in the car, started the engine,
and put my gear to reverse.
I zoom right out my greasy gate,
My tires, all four of them, bursts.
I took one look in the mirror,
I knew it's down the drain,
I might as well call in sick,
and tell my boss it's the rain.
Who would believe that all four tires,
would deflate so quickly at once?
It sounds like a bad joke by a bad comedian,
not believable - like a very bad pun.
I took one last look at my watch,
It's way past 'possible' o-clock.
I left the car to fend for itself,
I went into the house without my socks.
I jumped right back into my silky bed,
happy to see my five pillows.
I am not excited it's the start of the week,
but Tuesday can never be this mellow.
I shut the window, pulled the blinds,
Sleep deprived made me berserk.
"Mundane Monday", "Monday blues",
Whatever...you're the one at work.
Mar 25, 2013
Mar 25, 2013 at 9:29 AM UTC
Fandango cartography
Dance of our lives
Verbarxenelasia breast but not thigh
Ruricolist unmentionables off to the side
Blowlamp irradiance, pistil niche guide
Sacerdotal ceremony the cloven hoof of ******* saints
Intrinsic allegory to despoil trust and heart deflate
Inaudible uproarious potvaliant jingoism schism
Suppurateing deep held fears ungrounded sparks annihilate
Mar 15, 2014
Mar 15, 2014 at 8:25 PM UTC
Love can mend
Love can peel at the very corners of your eyes and bury its way in
Into your brain being mind and heart
Love can cradle and hold and nourish and feed
Love can hide away and feel safe
Love can breathe
But love is not always a familiar face
Not always a sparkle in her eye
Or a tune in his voice
Love can fall
Love can break
Love can suffer and bleed and scratch it's way back out through your ducts while you wonder why your tears are burning
Love can make you feel smaller than the gravel under your feet and more insignificant than a seal that's been broken for the prize
Love can literally rip you limb from limb and make you feel like you cannot bear the thought of getting out of bed
Love can deflate and berate eradicate obliterate...
incinerate
Love burns
But it burns so good
You come out alive
Love can make you learn what it's like to be vulnerable
Love can make friendly faces feel like home where your tears won't fall but be puddled in their favorite shirt
Love can make thrive and lift you back up
Love can see through lies but only after it's been lied to
Love can feel safe and warm again once it's been left in the cold
Love can be real after seeming so empty and meaningless and a waste
Love can make you bleed
But you'll never be able to leave her
You only keep pining for more because she's beautiful
You wanna hold her again because some nights she did lay still
You need her back because it made you feel real even though you at one time felt nothing at all
You hate her but only because you love her
Love can grow
Love can expand
Love is in a car with good music
Love is in a bed with warm bodies to feel
Love is a conversation that makes you cry
Love is a meal that makes you feel full
Love is everywhere
And she is kind to you
You can't find her in those that don't feel her
You feel betrayed because love won't love you back
Love is not everyone
But love is not just another heart attack.
Jan 13, 2014
Jan 13, 2014 at 2:45 AM UTC
No one's here to hear my pleas
You said you be back but you never came
A false thread of hope torments me
As I scream out for help your hope has done nothing but plunge me deeper into the water
Finally I stop trying and accept my fate
You were to late
All hope has to eventually deflate
Feb 10, 2018
Feb 10, 2018 at 7:56 PM UTC