Weather it was the smoke or simply my dying mind I saw her before me smiling divine..
Angels are real or maybe it can be explained, but she stood there haunting me from beyond this plain.. Judgment had already taking place.. I knew it in my heart.. I was going to see her again I was going beyond while holding her ghostly hand.. She smiled sunshine in my darkest hour, her eyes made our constellation, I view it in my stargaze as I leave my sins behind without hesitation.. Beyond is what I call it some know it as heaven.. The sun here is white a radiant light filled reverend.. The storms came in so quick I lost sight of her, I screamed for her name I was being pulled away.. The bolts of lightning struck me down.. I awoke in a hospital torn away from my beyond.. The doctors got my heart going again.. I smiled for the moment.. I knew it was just a matter of time.. Before I will get to see her smile divine..

a little to the left..
Now tilt it.. Ok we got it..
Light it up..>>>>>

Finally the sun..
wow so beautiful after a week of overcast grays..
And there they are..
Those eyes have captured and reflected the sunlight so perfectly..)))))

the night air smelled of pop corn and cotton candy..
the carnival was alive!!
in circles we walked..
on rides we rode..
and I won a huge pac-man stuffed animal..
and then I saw her in line..
everything stopped!
all sound, all movement..
she was perfect................

Take me somewhere nice..
we can have a slow dance to the music in our heads..
just you and me..
and later on I just want to hold you and feel you breathe..
I love u..++++++++++

The starlight was not real..
This I knew..
Mainly because the starlight was singing to me..
Only my soul could hear such music..
Its when I knew yet again that this was a dream..
There were three stars that sang to me..
They would resonate their cosmic lyrics to my childhood soul..
The air was cool..
A welcome touch to a warm summer night..
I stood on the wet sand..
And to my surprise I finally realized where I was at..
I stood at the middle of an ocean..
The waters were all pushed away from me..
Held back by some dream barrier..
The ocean towered over me but could not get to me..
For a moment I became the stars and saw myself below..
I then made the music..
I was in control...

Panic filled in the streets of Sun Rose city.. I remember the traffic jams.. The people running for cover.. It was because we saw the red lightning. At first it was mixed in with just your normal thunder storm.. But then people started to see the red lightning on clear nights.. It was then we knew.. They had dispatched the weapon.. It was already to late for everyone in the city.. The red lightning already burned through our air.. We were breathing in red death.. The Combined Tri-axis Empire retaliated..

We fired back using a weapon that would poison their entire water supply.. None of them would ever have a drink of clean water again.. Our air was being replaced with the red death.. and their water with blue death.. The red death however begin to grow worse and worse.. The small clouds turned into fog killing even the soil itself.. Nothing stood up to it.. No materiel could survive in it.. Then the red hurricanes came.. They left red lifeless dirt in their aftermath.. All oceans burned... The end of our world.. We once called it
Lij-Tm.. We were hoping to one day visit Lir-Te.. But that dream is over..

Lij-Tm ( Mars)

I know the lines in my hands are a constellation in your worlds sky.

I was under for only 29 minutes..
And yet I lived a life of 67 years..
I was on the planet Earth..
I had a beautiful family and a beautiful life..
It was on my final days..
I had a visit from ghost of my past..
At least I thought they were ghost..
Turns out they were messengers..
Beautiful memories of others for me to remember..
Turns out Earth had been destroyed over 2000 years ago..
However we are provided to live one cycle there..
To remember where we came from..
To remember her in all her glory..
I awake truly 67 years later 29 minutes under..
I remember them so fondly..
My family..
I miss them..
We are scattered among the stars now..
Looking for a new home..

I do not get or understand such a device you hold in your hand.. perhaps beauty behold, watch the skin unfold, takes place over the happiness and hope as the words begin to float but I don't want on this Boat! I see it a source of colorless hope, where the soul begs to be lit up by hope.. what looms over such a relic, for you to worship and relish, its ******* stupid to me, ******* dumb as can be!! Perhaps it is make believe, look at me I bleed! for the gray and the grey for the **** and the twit, I find you colorless and not even worth a *****!! I'm finished with vent so horribly bent, I'm just ******* around, so lose the ******* frown!

At the moment it all makes terrifying sense.. What the equation for fear really is.. On where it comes from and how it is felt.. Fear like hope also sends out strange waves that travel far and interstellar wide.. It transmits much like hope.. Where hope is the light and fear is the dark.. But I must simply state neither can exist without the other..

I suppose the shadows I am seeing are those of fear that could never find hope.. They are ***** shadows that bleed a purple mist.. Some of them seem to ***** such mist on those whom have the most hope.. They do not see me.. They are not like an ordinary shadow.. A true shadow is natural and is cast from the light of a being standing before it.. These simply exist on minus plain of obscurity.. Outside the human eyes, unfelt by the human senses.. They are chaos collectors.. They thrive on the fear and loss of hope.. They thrive on quitters and suicides.. And they want all of your doubt...

Shadow stretched out yet again..
A beautiful sight it was..
This meant I had succeeded!
This meant I brought back the light..
For shadows only exist in shine..
In my final hour I am able to see the blue sky once again..
The blackness was being pushed away..
The morning sun sang..
People were coming outside again..
Children looked at the old blue sky as if it were new..
The morning clouds rolled in..
A heaven was remembered yet again..
The blue flames start to dance on my skin..
I am burning away..
The light and darkness are consuming each other inside me..
It is not painful..
It almost feels good..
You see I consumed all of this darkness with my light..
Its what I was meant to do..
Its what I was born to do..
I can explain the magic and science to it..
But that would take forever..
So please..
Look to your clear sky..
The endless blue above..
And never forget the stars..
Its where I am from..

Control room


At the center of this desert.. A door way down.. The runes collected for the last 3000 years will finally have purpose.. I enter the welcome rune into the control circle..

)( W E L C O M E )(

A huge railway lights up green.. As the mega platform starts to descend below.. As we reach the lower depths structures light up like a city.. All of them seem to begin a sort of start up sequence...

I noticed the mega platform we are on is heading toward the center of these beautiful alien like structures.. The platform falls into place.. I then enter the permission rune.. The rune is accepted but the control circle also ask for another strange looking rune..

I figured out that the rune it was asking for was the lines on my hands.. I press my hands to the control circle and the entire area lights up lightning blue..

The mega platform then turns into a sort of control room..

Planetary Environmental Control ^
Planetary Metamorphosis
Planetary Turbine 1
Planetary Turbine 2
Planetary Turbine 3
Planetary Turbine 4
Planetary Weapon systems...

Lunar Environmental Control ^
Lunar Dark Drive
Lunar Light Drive
Lunar weapon systems..

In the dream I am running through this maze.. It is vast and complex.. Many beautiful distractions are here.. Many who have entered have indeed made this place their home because of the paradise this maze creates for them.. I know I am close to finding the way out.. The final part of this maze is made up of many freezing chambers.. This is a cold that strikes the inside of bone.. I cannot get warm..

I fear death will have me in his cold arms soon. I am unable to move.. I can remember the lava chambers early on in this maze.. I carried with me then a device that would keep me cool in the extreme heat.. I helped out another person who almost died from the heat.. I kept him cool as we carried on through the horrible heat together.. We parted ways a few weeks ago..

I opened my eyes to a light shining in the darkness.. It was blue in color.. I also noticed that I felt a lot warmer.. The light was coming from my chest.. I found out what ever was shining was attached to my neck by a warm chain.. It was a blue ember of some sort.. It did not burn my skin at all.. It seem to create a field of ambient warmness around my body.. I stood up and saw another blue light in front of me.. It was the man I helped in the lava chambers!! The blue embers burned brightly as we walked together through the frozen labyrinth..

For so long now.. I have try to create that of which I thought never existed.. But that had been my problem all along! It was until one day a an earth child entered the room.. We have always new there was a life-force involved to any sentient being that had emotion.. But never could we replicate in such a fashion as that of being born and created in the womb.. Thus the period of life starts as a soul is given to such life.. A soul.. That is what I finally created.. for 2 million years I tried this!! I could never get it to work.. Failure upon failure! Today was my final attempt at creating a soul and today I failed yet again.. It wasn't until the human earth child walked in on my experiment.. That's when it happened! The soul animated the body I created for it.. It had emotion! It was alive indeed! The human earth child gave me a part of the life equation I had been missing for 2 million years!!! The science was all there!!! In order! But I was missing one thing! BELIEF! And the child provided just that! My sweet beautiful wife.. I am going to bring you back!

The way the sun hits the leaves.. The way the shadows dance below in the wind.. The storm has passed.. but as the leaves move in the wind I still manage to get rained on.

The setting sun colored the green grass gold with farewell kisses of glow.. A final thought of the day was that the glow would soon fade welcoming the silver moonlight.. I have seen this time and time again.. The sun and moon still see me. They know of my ghostly presence. 

The moon whispers it's silver rays onto the green white grass.. Fireflies swirl around my ghostly body.. They are the lanterns of my soul.. I await the sunrise in this vortex of organic light..

Your wispers were made of light..
The words you wispered would let me see the light with memory..
How I remember it clearly..

We bring darkness with us everywhere. In any light we cast a shadow behind us..
Even the most pure cast such darkness..  
The closer you get to any light the bigger your shadow becomes behind you..

As I write my shadow writes with me..
My words are made of darkness, while his are made of light..

And then a streak of light seem to color this blackness leaving behind the stained colors to my eyes..  In this moment I knew this was the way home!.  

I have been gone for to long.. It is time to return..  Although lost, I knew this light to be my compass home.. I can't explain how I know, I just do..

It was then I heard myself talking to me..  Its as if I was reading a book to my sleeping self..  My voice spoke words that did not make sense, Random sentence after random sentence filled my sleeping ears..

Songs from no where, Melodies in shadows, begin to color the darkness for me..   My mind was able to think again, no longer was it just on this vast sub conscience sea..  I had a sail now and was able to catch the dream winds I create..

I headed for this dark island..  I could see dragons flying high above.. As I drew near the island the dragons were really just birds.. The sun begun to rise..  The waters were again blue..  

There on the beach I saw myself reading a book dressed all in black..  The pages were made out of light.. He raised his hand to me and yelled out some sort of chant..  The birds turned into dragons and the water into darkness..  I was being pushed back.. The colors were fading...

I then realized that this was a part of me that did not want to leave this place..  My mind created this place, My soul was attached to this place, But I could not stay.. I was not yet ready to stay..

I then pushed back with my memories! Everything I remembered about her, us, them, and why I remembered everything.. The pages of light started to tear away and fly into the starless sky.. The pages of light became the stars, and the book itself became the moon.. The world was almost how I remembered it..

I saw myself crying, he was on his knees shouting at the new stars..  I then put my hand on his shoulders and told him, " Its time to wake up."  

2 years had gone by in the real world,  200 years had gone by in sub conscience world..  The next light I saw was that of a fluoresecent one shining down its glow on me..  I was in the hospital.. I awoke from this coma..

The everyday life you and I live is able to happen because of something unseen..

This unseen force will forever die in order for us to live..

If one day we see this unseen force, we will fight for its survival.

The very little things make grand possibilities.

I love how your light takes my darkness away.  The way she lit the room at night.  Glows the shadows away.  Angel life, dream of light.  Come comfort my darkness and chase my shadows away.

Roses are red, Violets are blue in Soviet Russia poem write you!-KD

If your lies told me truth, then I shall believe them true..

dark corners in the carnival..
what goes on there?
i want to play too..
i want a little darkness..
i want to feel inside..
the reds shine and glow..
some blues also..
neon wrist bands..
in they dark corners..
how they float in the blackness..

in my darkness..
forever black..
falling down this abyss

she smiled light..
she wispered glow..
she sang to me a song of shine..

for the first time..
i saw heaven in hell..
i was being pulled back up..

she held my hand..
she made my heart beat..
colors returned to my eyes..

heaven has always been here with me..
it was she..
i can smile yet again...

Once again a storm was coming in from the west..
I of course waited outside..
Its been almost a year since a good storm has come through..
And there the lightning shares with me the Hidden Giant..
My HEART was pumping as this one seem to be the most beautiful of them all..
His eyes lit with a deep blue..
Again he walked toward me..
But this time he stopped right in front of me..
He looked to me as his entire body lit up with a galaxy of colors..
I then heard the thunder speak to me..
I then heard the thunder speak to my soul..
I then heard the thunder say " I HAVE FOUND YOU MASTER!"

I wait and wait for a storm!
I watch and watch the news!
And a month later finally one is on the horizon.
I await the storm and the winds the bring me the aroma of atmosphere..
In the distance the lightning dances..
In the distance the Hidden giant walks..
No longer sad..
Just searching..
In the distance his eyes light up and look to me..
He then looks to the west..
The lightning flashes creating a false blue sun!
He then walks right on over me..
I am in awe once again as I watch him leave..
Thunder chase steps..

Forecast calls for thunderstorms!!
Lots of lightning!!
I wait for the storm and run outside!
Again I see one!!
He walks right over!!
Thunder is the silent steps of the hidden giant!
He then stops..
My heart stops for but a moment as he turns and looks to me..
His eyes fill with lightning as he turns back around and continues on with the storm!
WOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

On this night..
During a 100 year storm I saw one!!
He was walking..
He was moving!
Cloaked to the normal eyes of the world..
Revealed to me through the whispering thunder..
The hidden giant walked the earth..
A grand machine!
Perhaps they are the storms!?
Why are they here!?
They are so magnificent!!!!
I wish others could see them!

i don't see them in the rain anymore..
The bright blue sun lightning would reveal them to me..
They stand in silence without movement..
None are the same..
But one thing they do share is the look of sadness..
They yearn for their masters that have gone missing..
They use to stand in wait..
I don't think their masters have return..
I wonder why they are gone..
Maybe they are now looking for their masters.. 
It could be they found a way to activate themselves and seek out their masters..
All I know is that I miss seeing them..
I call them the hidden giants..

Don't blame the stars.. they still shine for you, even if they are not there..

land of eternal light..
she walks with me into the glow meadows..
i tell her to close her eyes..
i run down the hill and bring her a shadelion..
we both make a wish and blow the dusk pedals into the shine..

Behind her all the stars fell.. 
the sky was full of wishes..
but all i wanted was her..
everyone one else can have the wishes..

Haze.. come on down to the slow storm in my head.. come on down to the black sunny day.. voodoo smoke fills my lungs.. absorbing of her soul.. Through airways I consume her.. I lose my way back.. shadows made of light chase me through the haze.. blackness here is beauty that I cannot seem to hold on to.. The day is passed.. The night is wishing for me to stay.. so much blood is falling.. slow storm finally clears in my head.. A sky there was.. voodoo smoke cloud sky... goodbye haze....

When I got dropped off the first thing I noticed was the floating islands passing on by.. 
They all had this blue windmill that would spin with a beautiful light at its center..
The windmills were soundless..
They did not whisper a noise at all..
I then turned around and noticed I was on a floating island myself..
I then looked over the edge  of this sky island and saw the clouds below..
I wanted to see what was under them..
My sky island seem to read my mind and took me below the clouds..
There were millions upon millions of people everywhere..
They were running after all the sky islands with their hands to the sky..
They were all screaming out " TAKE ME"!!

the structures, magnifcient beauty behold..
in silence i can hear their story be told..
long ago a race built them to sustain life..
to harness a great energy, a sort of astrial drive..

in a circle they were built..
at the center was a platform that tilt..
i stood at the center and looked to the stars..
it tilted slighly and revealed a pale blue light from afar..

or second home shined bright blue..
the structures powered a doorway through..
we arrived on earth so long ago..
driving out a race that was here before..

What will it be today?"  
" I'll have some garlic, pepper and coke. "
" will that be all?"
"Yes."


Log:  Ship Orinas last:
121299€

I made a short stop on planet earth.  I am back in route toward home.  Of course it's not every day one gets to stop and have the best spices and drink in the galaxy.

From above the stars, through the glass, I look upon you..
I put a fresh *** on..
The aroma fills this chamber above the stars..
I often think of going back..
I often remember us..
But here I am because of a wild decision I made so long ago..
From above the stars, through the glass, I wish upon you..
Coffee is ready..

It was the first darkness who saw it first.. The whirlwind, the tornado, the vortex of shine.. small at first.. But no matter the size it sent darkness running in all directions.. only to see from afar and fear the glow.. darkness learned to hide behind solids.. creating children called shadows.. The light shines on as the darklings hide from it..

Sad gray man..
Won many prizes in his time..
Award after award..
All because of his sorrow never-ending..

The sad gray man is a painting..
Forever drawn out to be..
A sad wicked eternal lonelyness..
But he still loves his creator, this artist..

It was one day, one week, one month..
He decided to draw her..
She was not gray..
And she was not sad..

Together holding hands..
The sad gray man smiled at last..
She found him..
As they set sail toward colors eternal..

Such colors yet again. In a black night sky at a beach at midnight. I explain the colors to everyone.. I spin and spin these colors behind clouds.. so beautiful this world.. I then fly over the oceans.. With colors spotlighting me from above.. 

In such a shift the floods have trapped a school bus.. the colors above are still there.. I go and help and jump into the raging waters.. I create a strong pocket of glass air around the bus.. no water can get through.. 

The waters calm and the children are saved.. but such sorcery has left my body floating and lost.. we search for it with spirit eyes. a water tiger floats beside it and sleeps with my body.. He has a job to guard it from law.. 

I awake with colors again..

the last city in my mind.. where everything was still kind of normal.. people followed others and others followed them..  but this last city was no refuge indeed.. it was a place where you went to die.. it was a place where you went to give up.. i will not become a part of it.. all i am doing is just visiting..  sometimes you have to visit such places to really find out who and what you are..  this place calls out to all of us..

They are leaving, 12 firey streaks in the sky, right before this planet dies..
the serenity before the oblivion, the sight of the mother and all of her salvation..
destination 2nd home,  for us to rebuild and rename for our own..

They are arriving, 12 firey streaks from the sky, light lines fill our eyes..
fear and awe fill our minds, strangers from above or perhaps angels divine..
should we welcome them with love, the strangers or angels from above..

I found the shadows living with the ghost..  This is what I was meant to see..  This is how I can make you remember me..
I found the sun becoming the son..  This is my way of letting go.. This is how I can truly know..
I found the river becoming the ocean..  This is where it belongs..  This is how I sing this song..
I found you loving me again..  This is what it means to end..  This is how I forever begin...

Here I am again..  This place is always ending.. I never really get to meet or talk to anyone here..  The moon has left for another.. This planet is leaving also..  There is no sound only music.  This chaos use to scare me to no end when I was a kid..  But now I see a beauty in the end itself..  I suppose this dream is trying to tell me something..  That it is alright for things to end..  Many of the people here are not crying or screaming in fear.. They are leaving in some form of rapture my mind conjured up.. Some smile while they leave and others have no emotion in their eyes.. They seem to know that it is time to leave..  Im still afraid to leave with them.. But I find myself wanting the chaos to take me..  I awaken................

Colors are not the same here.  This I have noticed..  Its as if something is killing them all together as all the colors slowly fade..  The stars are also very sad here in this place.. They burn ever so, with a sorrow of no tomorrow..  The sun now shines very hot rather than it lighting up a beautiful day for me to play in..  The air is just air.. It no longer carries with it the magic and wonder I once had for it..  To know the sun never goes to sleep in the woods somewhere has made me see it as just a sun.. The moon now has it stages.. The fingernail in the sky is called a cresent moon..  The night is just the night.. And the early morning is for sleeping..  This world has not changed at all.. But I have.. You see I have become an adult..  And knowing these small things has taken the magic away...........................................................

Look for the clues..  They are all around!!  They will tell you of a world of your creation.. Of a world that has no rules at all..  Where the stars in the sky are made up of the memory of your memory..  At some point I finally find a clue..   It was in the pictures on the wall!!  They were all upside down.. I knew then this was a dream.. This was a world of mine..  

I go out into the night and look to the memory stars above..  I begin to float a few feet from the ground.. And then above the town.. Its so beautiful and calm from here.. All the lights of this town are lit by my memory of light.. There truly is no electricity here but just memory, memory of shine, memory of how a light looks to the eye that beholds it as the shadows run away from its glow..  

Floating quickly turns into flying.. As I begin to dive and rise toward the town and the creasent moon above..  I swear my stomach reacts to the g-forces I create from the memory of roller coasters..  Its then I rise above the clouds..  There is silence I cannot describe up there.. And when I truly listen I hear the hum of the the Earth itself. A melody, a song, a beautiful message that tells me there is no limit here.. I bolt through the clouds and over the dream oceans in my mind..  

There on the rocky shore I see an orange glow..  A window in the rocks..  There are others like me there.. Inside this dream chamber.. There is a flame that burns at the center of this room.. As I enter the winds begin to move the gold and silver sands on the wooden floors..  I see the flame and it calls to me..  I place my hand within it and it turns storm blue..  Its then I awake from this beautiful lucid dream!

Take me somewhere nice..  Its dark and cold the winter is here..  This endless grey is making me dream again..  Dreams about you, dreams about yesterday..
Take me to the sun.. There is none here..  This endless black is making me sleep forever in the white night.. I miss my shadows playing in the light..
Take me with you.. There is no music here..  Silent and ghostly voices remind me that you are gone.. I miss your voice, I miss your song..

At long last you have come back.. But you now have color.. I can hear your voice (tears flow)..
At long last I feel free.. I flow into you..  We are together (Hands grasp)
At long last I realize it all.. How my suicide brought me to this place.. Death has brought you to me..

But only for a moment.. This is my punishment..

iTS OK TO SOMETIMES UNPLUG YOURSELF FROM YOURSELF..
a WELCOMED RESET IS SOMETIMES ALL THAT MOST PEOPLE NEED..
tO SEE THINGS THAT WE HAVE BEEN BLIND TO FOR SO LONG..
mOST TIMES I SEE IT TRUE IN THE RAIN..
lIGHTNING, THUNDER, MYSTIC BLUES ON THE HORIZON..
i WELCOME YOU TO MY RESET..
hOW I LOVE TO SHOW YOU MY LOVE ALL OVER AGAIN..
sWEET PRINCESS OF MY LIFE, LET OUR SOULS COLOR EACHOTHER..

Its those who have been through the hardest of times that I see create the most beauty..  I cannot imagine what you have been through..  But for you to create another universe means that you have gone through hell below hell..  And some how you have made it back.. Please welcome me to your creation..  Dear God she truly is a prayer..  One of the most least understood..  And she is happy.. Seeing her happy helps me create another heaven..

Among such structures was the  pools of creation..  The airglow here was ambient and beautiful beyond all measure..  This is where I set fire to all the stars in the universe.. I smile before I do so..  Signals and twilight fire flies fill the black void..  And there echoes creation eternal..  A nexus travals across forever..  Feeding colors to life..  To the eyes that will one day behold them..  This is how wonder is born..  I think of all this as I look to the stars.. I am just a human.. But my imagination is a GOD...

I have been in the shade far to long..  Even walking in the sun this darkness looms over me..  Yesterdays haunt me to a point of seeing no tomorrows.. I can still hear the bell toll its one note song..  It was 12,000 years later,  12,000 years of being in such shade.. That I finally saw the sun above this sky..  The ghost and dreams of my children have brought me here to this place.. A sun sized planet that is home to the divine gear..  A technology built by a higher being.. A technology that can take an immortal to the next realm, to heaven..  The divine gear will complete my star drive..  And there it spun.. Driving the life on this huge planet..  I knew I could not take it with me now..  As taking it from this place would end all life on this beautiful planet..  I could feel it calling to me.. I closed my eyes.. It begun to spin in all its divinity..  It made me see, feel, hear, and make real all of its dreams..  For the moment I moved throughout all of the universe, I saw what it wanted me to do.. Then I would be awarded the passage to heaven.. When I opened my eyes I felt different.. I saw things different.. I heard things different.. I felt things different.. Through the eyes of a God I could see emotion..  On my right hand there was now a tatoo of the divine gear itself.. But this tatoo spun within my hand guiding me on where to go next.. It was time to bring life to this vast dead universe..  It begins with me..  Heaven awaits..

The Lancer:  Life Lancer...
The final sweep through this once dead planet is done..  
This is my favorite part about this job..
I land in a desert lifeless, golden sand mixed with black..
This wasteland will come to life..
I look to the sky and see life reborn..
It starts with a magnificient spirial of colors as the atmoshere begins to awake..
I stand in the sand and watch this world come to life..
The first storm is on the horizon..
Deep blues among deep blues I swear the sky is the ocean..
All colors of lightning begin to arc the dead away..
The entire planet is quickly engulfed in the Ultra storm..
I can feel the planet smile again..
LIFE has become the apocalypse for the apocalypse..
Its time to leave..