Seldom in life do I come across
people I can be myself around.
Most of the time I feel like
I have to put on a show
to get through the day,
to get through life.
But sometimes you find
someone who can read your soul
as if it were their favorite poem.
It's with people like this you can be honest,
without the judgement and the fear
that they'll think less of you.
Oh, how rare they are-
so rare that you can
mistake it for love.

I have written you,
and I will write you again,
for the words can not stop flowing.
They have long since forgotten
the way back to you,
now they are just trying to
fill up the void that exists
in my heart.

Roses and dinner,
a bottle of wine and cheese
for my Valentine.

2:31 PM
14/2/20

What is sadder:
to forget or to remember?

Oh, how she
longs for sweet, little
death
while I long for
her sweet, little
heart

You’re in the colours
I see everyday and you’re
in the rainbows I see
on special days.
Even though I don't see you anymore,
you still make up the spectrum
that gives my life beauty.
I don't see how I could forget you
when you're still painting
the colours in my life.

It doesn't take long
to memorize someone
but it can take a lifetime
to forget the memories,
the pain and the
heartache.

My heart is wearing out
after feeling everything
so passionately, so intensely
and now I think I need a new heart.

It always
ends the same-
you found someone,
you turn away and
just like that,
the magic
is gone.

You have moved on while
I am still paralyzed and
I can't move at all

11:34 PM
1/6/22

Those were not my tears,
they were memories streaming
that I can't get back

1:09 AM
2/6/19

I gave everything
to hold on to something I
never even had

9:31 PM
3/6/19

Maybe living is
itself morally worse than
never being born

4:08 PM
19/5/20

We all wander,
sometimes too much,
about those who truly care
for us.
We believe that no one
would care if we weren’t here-
but think about all the ones that
you have ever cared about and
how they have no idea about it.
I had a college teacher I
haven’t seen in too long
yet I still tell people how much
of an impact he had even though
he doesn't have a clue.
I have old coworkers,
people I met through travels,
and friends turned acquaintances
and haven’t seen in years
who I would be devastated about
if something happened to them.
We secretly care about so many people
but act like it’s impossible that
anyone cares about us.
Impossible - people do.
more than you think,
even if you can’t see it.

Just like
fractured hearts,
light must be fractured
to make a
rainbow.

There are some people
who are better left in your
heart than in your life

7:38 PM
12/12/22

Yes, life does go on-
it's not the same as before,
but it does go on.

12:08 PM
10/4/21

Perhaps I am not
alone as I thought I was-
perhaps they do care

4:15 PM
29/12/21

Poets are a strange bunch-
we enjoy the fall until we've hit the ground.
Sometimes we push ourselves if
for nothing but the art.
Oh, how we find that spark
in the darkness of suffering.
Indeed, what a mad bunch we are,
to find sanity in our madness
and I wouldn't have it
any other way.

Everyone's in the search
for a love that doesn't exist,
without first knowing who they really are.
How are you supposed to know
what love you will find,
love you can give,
if you don't bother to know
the love you are?

my dream has been a
curse in one too many ways-
I found and I lost you.

Whatever she creates
leaves me utterly in awe-
every thought of hers
leaving me entranced.
Maybe you have me under a spell,
or maybe this is one big dream.
All I know is that I need
more of you in my life.

Depression doesn’t care for
the size of your bank account,
or tire from how many laps you can run.
It doesn’t care how bright the sun is
or who holds you in each night.
Depression sneers at all those photographs
lined upon your bedside table.
It won’t ask to use your emotions
to taint them and everything
that may hold some light to the dark.

Ah, nevermind,
anyway, wherever you are right now,
whatever you are doing,
I wish you all the best
this world can offer-
always and forever.
You deserve it.
And though our lives
don't always go as planned,
when it pulls you down and
drags you through Hell,
remember you have come so far.
You can get through it-
I’m sure you’re still the
strong person I remember.
And when you feel lost, sad,
hollow, lonely or exhausted,
understand that it’s okay
to feel them all.
You’re okay.
Everything is going to be okay.
Let it flow, let it go.
Good things are waiting for you
and let me remind that if you ever need
someone to talk to,
you'll know where to find me.
Don’t hesitate to call,
I’ll be here with open arms.
Just because we don't keep in touch,
does not mean I don't still adore you to the core.
But more importantly,
please don’t forget that you matter.
You are adored.

It is true,
each day brings us
closer to death.
But you,
you make each day
worth living.

Never admit defeat
when there's still
time to
win.

Loneliness is a
prison and I am serving
a life time sentence

9:22 PM
27/10/20

It's been a while
since the last time
I dreamed of
you and I.

I myself in
the blissful radiance of
the sunflower field
contained within your soul.
It warms me like the eternal bond
between the sun
and the flower.

I hope you win all the
wars you keep to yourself-
the ones you tell
no one about.

I couldn't see it,
love had blurred my vision
but the warning signs were
as clear as day.
Then you let me go,
and suddenly,
I could see again but
it was too late.

How can my
pillow still smell of you?
How do my lips
remember yours as if
they were my own?
Memories that don't exist
torment me
day after day,
night after night.

I think forgetting
will always be easier
than remembering

9:50 AM
31/7/22

Time seems to only fly
when you
don't want it to,
right?
Sometimes our days drag on
and on like passing clouds-
other days, like shooting stars-
blink and you'll miss it.

look them in the eye,
and kiss them deeply
until all of their rage is gone.
swallow their pain and fury whole,
become the storm yourself,
learn to survive yourself

You took
my soul
and ran

Even when I'm happy,
there is a certain sadness.
Even in my words, my smile,
there is a hint of melancholy
that I cannot escape.

If I close my eyes,
maybe imagination
will bring me to you

4:58 PM
4/12/20

Death to these feelings-
and death to this night, for it
doesn't seem to end

7:39 PM
23/8/19

I guess I should have known better
than to let you in again, right?
I guess not.
No matter how many times
you leave a hole in my chest
leaving me to pick up the pieces
I always find my heart crawling back
to you to give you another chance
that you don’t deserve.
My heart, the fool, thinks that maybe
this time you’ve changed for the better.
Maybe this time, you really mean it.
Maybe this time, you will not repeat.
*******.

It's cold out
tonight-
I hope you still have
a vacancy left
in your heart
for this weary
soul.

I do envy the ocean.
They call its darkest parts
mysterious,
not ugly.

Dear Diary;
Does not drinking
half a bottle of gin
make me more or
less fun at parties?
On second thoughts,
don't answer that.

I was your someone
until you became someone
else's someone

It’s mostly silence and sorrow
between us now.
We’re not lovers anymore,
but we will always have this
miracle between us,
the kind that only angels know
when the heavens glance
upon her celestial face.

Sitting on a crowded bus
on my way to another show,
wondering why I bothered
leaving home in the first place.

The stars will rise
into the night sky
while the waves will ride
the eternal sea.
No time,
no space,
no deep or no high
Could ever keep this
away from me.

what actually were we
other than two broken hearts,
and two lost souls?
A sense of passion, yet only for an instant,
leading to an everlasting
feeling of torment.
Our distant dreams of romance
never quite turned into a reality
without even a daydream of hope.

It is not death that
worries me, it's the moments
that come before it

5:05 PM
20/10/20

How did they
break your heart?
I want to find new and
amazing ways of putting
it back together
again.