Have you ever went to the airport together, to watch the airplanes land & fly?
Have you ever sat outside, when it’s a full moon, and watch the stars shine across the sky?
Have you ever slow dance in the living room, playing old/new school R&B music, saying “I am yours & you are mines.”
Have you ever took a ride around town, talking about life? I swear it’s a vibe.

-You should try it sometimes

I PRAY

THROUGH THIS POEM,
YOUR SOUL CONTINUES TO BE LIFTED

I PRAY THAT YOUR GIFT FROM GOD MOVES OTHERS SO THEY CAN BECOME A WITNESS

I PRAY THAT DARK DAYS SHORTEN
& BRIGHTER DAYS LIGHTEN

I PRAY YOU NEVER FALL
INTO THE DEVIL’S WORLD

I PRAY THAT YOU SEE YOUR HAPPINESS IS MY JOY & MY JOY IS YOUR HAPPINESS.
NEVER A WEAKNESS

I PRAY THAT YOUR SKIN STAY SMOOTH &
YOUR APPEARANCE STAY YOUNG LIKE THE YOUTH

I PRAY THAT YOU GIVE A **** ABOUT YOURSELF MORE

I PRAY THAT YOU MAKE MONEY

I PRAY THAT YOU CONTINUE TO NEVER BACK DOWN FROM ANYBODY

I PRAY THAT YOU NEVER WASTE AN OPPORTUNITY

I PRAY THAT WHEN YOUR KIDS GROW UP,
THEY GET TO WITNESS AN AMAZING LIFE WITH BOTH PARENTS BY THEIR SIDE

I PRAY THIS SELF-VOICE WITHIN YOU GIVE YOU MOTIVATION

Who do you think you’re talking to?
Did you forget i’m human to?
Where did all your morals go? Or
were you born with ignorant stupidity.

To many times you cross the line
insulting racial slurs towards athletes
getting all sensitive, losing your mind.
Objects thrown, emotions shown
among the crowd time after time,
like how could you be so heartless?
What about being spit at on the court,
maybe the organization should have you fined
and banned for life from events.

Just because you bought tickets
to watch us play, doesn’t give you
the right to say nor do whatever
you want towards athletes.
This may be entertainment to you
but this is our career, our life, our job,
our occupation- to win games.

Discovering
Energy
Empathy
Prefer

Intimacy
Need
Spark
Infatuation
Do it
******

I am a child of God
I am not to be played with.
Born with a soul purpose to carry joy & provide.
My flaws may get me into trouble but
My presence shines peace.
Yet, threaten me with your demonize ignorance
& I will introduce you to your grave.
I promise your relationship will be intimate.

I can’t wait
for the day
I
open up to her,
knowing
she will never
use my past
as
ammunition

Throughout my life, I came into contact with different females.
Each one with their own unique experience.
Some shape or form, I love each & every one of them.
But looking back now, I realized they were never “the one” for me...

There were some who I could get along with,
Some I get into it with,
A few with good hearted intentions
& others jealous & insecure affections.
One can be protective.
Another manipulative.
This one time, a woman just needed a man like me for comfort.
Yet, thought about her ex as she wish he would come back & put in more effort.

If there was one thing they all had in common, it was telling me-“ you're simply just different.”
I never understood that phase.
I just live life simple & treated them with respect....
Maybe that’s what separates me from the rest...
I don’t know.

I’m sure they wonder if I think about them.
I wonder if they still think about me.
My love I have for them can’t vanish ever, even if I tried.
It’s “love” not “in love”  however; I could never keep it hidden inside.

Have you ever felt this way?

Pretty face, it’s about you isn’t it?
Pretty lies staring at me in those eyes,
I see the dark clouds over your heart
You’re wrong yet you like it, huh???
Crazy to see what kind of woman you are

Say anything & everything, just having your way over here
It’s the fake love for me that won’t keep me here
If you ghost me but play like you love me publicly,
Then are we really together?
There’s no happy ending in this fairytale called- “forever”

Never felt,
Never felt love where you stood
Never felt,
Never felt love where you stood

I’m grateful.
But I don’t owe you sht

You have options, but wasting my time isn’t one.
Honey, I don’t owe you sht

Boundaries, boundaries, boundaries is what I praise.
I don’t owe you sht

You’re entitled to your opinions & feelings.
However love, come back to reality cause
I don’t owe you sht

I make efforts, easily
and yet again I say, I just don’t owe you sht

You want explanations for everything but remember,
I don’t owe you sht

You can’t even be accountable
yet you want a relationship - relationship?…
No baby,  I don’t owe you sh*t

Eyes open every morning, see self-made, I was born for it
Jesus by my side every day, walking under faith for it
Bonded from the ground up, sacrifice my time for it
Told him that I have a dream, told me to go work for it
Can't worry to much about the past
Wrote a list under covenant, while learning how to fast
Have to stay focus and keep myself strong
Thought I couldn't make it but he surely proves me wrong

Pre-drinking
but when was the last time you put something in your savings?

I need to tell you the truth
Not lie nor give you an excuse
I have a crush on you babe
But fear your love, that it’s fake
Situation so repulsive
Yeah, heart has me chasing after toxic

Afraid to ask, but I wanna say...
I want you bad & I can’t no longer wait.
You’re making me vulnerable right now
It’s everything I’ve always want
You’re breaking my heart, walls burning down
It’s everything I’ve never want

Dying flower, dying flower
Dying flower, dying, dying dying
Dying flower, dying flower
Dying flower, dying, dying, dying

I wish that I can undo
The past; I want to undo.
Where our paths cross that we walked
Now that I know who you are.
Commitment from you was never an option for me
Caught up in my feelings, believing that this was meant to be
Feels like my life is nothing but a funny, yet, sad meme
But I still want you all for me.

You’re making me vulnerable right now
It’s everything I’ve always want
You’re breaking my heart, walls burning down
It’s everything I’ve never want

Dying flower, dying flower
Dying flower, dying, dying dying
Dying flower, dying flower
Dying flower, dying, dying, dying

Roses are red
Violets are blue
Close to my roots
But you have to dig deeper for this forbidden fruit

If God woke you
between 2-5am…
Would you seek what he sees?
Or run from his needs?

If he sent you an angel
Will you praise his might?
Would you ignore & hide?

You know…
rebel him & fight

What’s the point in being alive?
Faith; & pray things will get better.

You might be the one, you might give me excitement
We could be forever just don’t keep me waiting
Baby, feeling all your vibes, maybe to much of it
Kiss me how you want, you can take control of it
Why don’t we take a trip around the world, we can visit Paris
Don’t worry about your girls, they may get crazy jealous
Or I can take us on a cruise, it would be fun, wouldn’t it?
Know that it’s just us, & there is no replacement babe

You can be the one, you can be my main squeeze
When I lay you down, I can go fast or move it slowly
I can show you love, even maybe be smooth for you
I can dress up & look real cute for you
If I wanna be naughty, baby, would you really like that?
If I foreplay, boo, would you play back?
Point me to any direction, & watch my affection
Let’s keep this simple, babe, no need for second guessing

I caught you in a lie
Told me you’re not into the party life
But I saw you doing drugs & getting high.
Standing in my face
Playing cool, giving multiple denies.

Evidence is right here,
Your actions walk like how you talk.
Must’ve bumped your head to many times coming home late, hearing you fall.
You free now,
Go do whatever you want
I’m not trippin’ at all.
Before you leave this house,
I’ll make sure that you’re blocked.
Don’t run back months later
Giving me that sweet “baby talk”

Thought you would go unnoticed, taking chances
Thinking you were special but you’re just basic
Out late in the streets getting faded
Should’ve been careful vs. reckless

i’m not your supporter
that you can just mooch on
nor call to attend to your every need

I’ll never forget senior night
when I first noticed you
after our last home game of the season.

I was at the game table,
broadcasting on the radio
my plans after high school.

I notice you starring me down
Ms. Hazel eyes.
biting your lips, smiling.
waiting for me to finish.

Glancing at you, ending my interview quickly.
grabbing my full attention.

Walking over, to approach you, I said:
“I remember you love
from earlier in the season.
nice to see you again lol
here’s my number
come see me tonight.”

Tell me something
Sadly you can’t even tell me nothing
I rather ignore you vs. focus on you.
My blessings are never a imitation
Your image is imagination & not creation.
This is how it is, can you feel the vibration?
Dodging all the bullets, reaping what you sow
Building up a wall, running as you go
Sleeping in the mind, where nobody can find you
where did you go?
Image in the mirror, marbles on the floors
Peeking out the window, searching for a hero
Looking like a fool
Glory God goals
Cause Lord only knows
That I’ve been going hammer, someone check my grammar
She freaking through the cameras, phone in her left hand as she wearing sandals.
She hate working Monday's, someone please change this channel
She hanging with some snakes, can’t control who’s fake
Stays on the phone, but in public, can’t even conversate.
Never compromise, not enough faith
***, money, stress, can you meditate?

These are the times, to level up & shine
Never to rewind
Help's on the way, friend's on the way, parent's on the way
Baby girl, I got winners on the way!
You’re somebody, can’t you even tell?
You’re somebody, don’t you fall or you'll end up in hell!

You ain’t sick enough to put it on yourself
Go get your image it’s hanging on the shelf
Tell me when destruction is gonna go away
Tomorrow never promised, but we live today!
Peace to the world, King/Queen just rotate!
Loyalty, royalty, joyfully, our DNA...

A B C D E F G
d  r  o  i  x a  e
a  a  n  l  u b n
p  v  s  i  b u e
t   e  i   g e  l  r
a      d  e r  o o
b      e  n a u u
l       r   t n  s s
e      a      t
        t
        e
H I  J K L M N
a  n a i  e   a  i
n  t  z n g  g  c
d u  z g i   n  e
s   i  y    t   i
o  t             f
m i             i
e  v            c
    e            e
                  n
                  t
O  P Q R S  T  U
b   a  u e  i   a   n
e   s   i  s  m s   i
d   s  e  o  p  t  q
i    i   t  u  l   e  u
e   o      r  e   f   e
n   n     c       u
c    a     e       l
e    t      f
      e     u
             l
V W X Y Z
a   i   e  o  i
l    t   n u  n
u   t   i   t  g
e   y   a  h
          l   f
              u
               l

I’ve heard stories about the men in my family
Who were once kings to the wrong woman,
Become slaves as their dreams were taken away

I’ve watched the men in my family
Struggle through drugs & back-child support only to find out the child may/may not have been theirs

I’ve talk to the men in my family
That allowed a woman’s body to be known first, rather than know her. First reason why they’re divorced

I’ve lost many men in my family
Who souls were filled with goals
Corrupted by the world & it’s materialistic things, trending like followers.
Now their body is no more than a sleeping hollow

Where do I even begin......I can start off with a prayer.
Lord thank you for your mercy, your grace, your love, & each beautiful race.
Thank you for the opportunity and the message
Thank you for the Angels and blessing

“when are we gonna meet,
why did this happen, am I missing what you’re showing me, how can I handle this situation I don’t know nothing about, is this a life lesson, Am I able to make it too heaven , does the Bible answer all my questions, who’s my future fiancé?”

I ask a lot of questions when I don’t understand your work
Don’t take it the wrong way Father, I’m admiring your worth
Constantly stay in prayer for you as the Devil lurks
The temptation is real , one slip up & you’re hurt
Two battles will collide soon , heaven vs hell , Who has the strongest turf?
The rapture is coming, so it’s almost time to Rehearse

Thinking before & after I choose my decisions
Never a broken being in prison, to focus on the mission
Now that I’m older, I’m driven to become a better Christian
Forgive me Father I need you to listen, each day I’m receiving better wisdom

Childhood days: My uncle tried to convince his nephews that We’re better without a woman
Sharing his knowledge due to his mistakes, half of us bought it....
Mom always told us not to pay attention cause he was fallin
Family is a trip, pray to jesus for his soul, that’s my callin....

2016-My last relationship, she wanted to be in love
Seemed very simple & easy + she was my personal angel from above.
Things were going good with very high promise that a man can dream of
Til the baggage & trust issues came out of her, my spirit told me to “Wake up”.
Beginning & ending of Arguments , fights, along with giving up
I continue to live, yet feeling like I’m the one that messed up.
Greed became a major goal of hers vs just us
But She wanted more & more from me cause it wasn’t enough.
Time pass & Two-Separate paths showed after the break up
I left it alone cause it was too much to overcome.
Both Gemini with almost similar personalities, but listen up
Til this day, I sometimes hold her in my heart as my own beloved.

Nowadays, people talk like they know somethin
Think they know their worth, but they don’t know nothin
Calling each other “The God”, and that’s how they feel
Trying to get a piece of shine, social media, that’s not a meal
This generation wanna have fun, that’s a fun fact
Getting turnt up, but never pays attention to the impact
Or how it may affect their lives for the future
This new wave is strong like a Brain tumor

More then ever it’s time to get myself together
Im ready to start a family, yet I know I have a few more “stay single” moments with whomever
Don’t judge me cause I’m living life to my fullest experience this semester
It’s an adventure that we all go through, won’t last forever

So Every morning I beg God for his mercy.
As he challenge my intelligence on this new journey.
Cause my own mind gets me in trouble, try not to worry.
I’m 24 now & before you know it I’ll be 30.

“But ye are a chosen generation, a royal priesthood, an holy nation, a peculiar people; that ye should shew forth the praises of him who hath called you out of darkness into his marvellous light:”
‭‭1 Peter‬ ‭2:9‬ ‭KJV‬‬

Lord, tonight I’m on my hands & knees, so I hope that you’re Listenin’.
Getting difficult for me to avoid multiple temptations
I’m trying to stay discipline.
Unlike mankind, I’m choosing to be build different.
Changing the outcome of my actions, I’m being way more vigilant.
I want to keep our promise we made together through this covenant.
And, I take full responsibility. I know that I’m not innocent.
~
Man, last year I got into a fight with man who was ignorant.
Got upset over a call in basketball I made & he lost it.
Took his frustration out on me due to his emotions being bottled in.
He had it out for me for a long time, this was no coincidence.
I wanted to mark his face with a final blow that would be permanent.
I was ready to risk it all that day during this whole incident.
~
Okay, summer time comes, I was in class all day studyin’
Evening shifts, late nights, grinding hard, constantly hustlin’
After 5 long weeks I failed my finance class that I was in
Program dropped me out of it, GPA low, not proud of it
Tick off cause I felt like all that hard work was all for nothin &
Decided to switch up, pursue poetry that I’m passionate in
So I left school, never looked back at the lost accomplishment
~
2019 was the start of a beginning breakup.
A test-run to give me a taste of a nasty setup.
March 29th- the day lost everything due to a house fire.
Left a terrible sight in my eyes making feel bitter.
Homeless for 4 months with nothin attached to my name neither.
Life handing out frustration, gimme a minute, I need a breather.
~
But now I’ve grown more mature while learning how to stay pure.
Stuck in this grey area of love of feeling sure & sometimes insecure.
My girl-I know I’m good for her, but I’m also real to her.
Times are different with her, hopefully not like what they once were.
Learning how to not blind myself when I express love.
Searching for your voice, God, tell me if she’s the one?
Hoping for a yes so I know that I am enough.
Otherwise the 3 of us will have a lot to discuss, that’s real.
~
I deal with a lot of people situations beside me
People want to disrespect me vs try and protect me
Everyone wants to control me, but don’t know how to love me
Everyone say they miss me, but won’t come see me
Everyone likes to go ghost and do it so freely
Everyone choose to banned me rather than try to understand me