People stand around
Worried sick

Wondering and waiting
For life to click

They're always the victim
Always feeling sorry

Hoping for a fight
But never emerging in glory

To be fair
I will give them the benefit of the doubt

Even though all they do
Is willow and shout

It's true that it's tough to get up
When life takes you so far down

And it's hard to get respect
When you walk with a broken crown

There are situations
That hit you when you have no plan

But my mother always said
Tough choices make the man

Tired and exhausted
I wish the world would freeze

But my clock ticks
and my face feels the breeze

I can barely walk
While everyone around me is running

I just want peace
Why does the planet keep turning

Night used to mean solace
But as the world turned so did the seasons

Solace changed to nightmare
And visits from demons

Things did get very bad
But I never stopped smiling

No-matter how big the demons got
And how much their whispers are enticing

There is hope in the darkest of nights
I am not phased by demon cries

I have heard them a million times
And I know the sun will again rise

Woke up
Looking for you

Thinking about your smile
You came out of the blue

I felt like I knew you my entire life
Seeing you gave me Deja vu

Everytime we hug I can't let go
Stuck together like glue

When I need someone
You're the person I go to

Our journey just started
But I know we'll make it through

She dances
To keep warm

Hoping one day
Her sun will rise again

Pale skin, blue lips
She never stops

She prays for a sunrise
That will never come

Her world will freeze
Along with her soul

I am emptied
Hollowed out
By you

The wind carries
My hollow body
Far away

A new land
Somewhere I
Can be whole

A man lives far
In distant land

He fled home
Centuries ago

Loved ones
Long forsaken

The terrors
Long forgotten

Restful nights
A man set free

Time passed
Nightmares Unburied

A man fled monsters
Centures ago

But twist or turn
Walk or run

All roads
Lead home

At the shore
Life casts
Your boat away

Further you go
Wondering if
Life carries you back

Baby come ashore
To my arms
Baby come home

I walk,
A thick brush
Paints my way

I cross,
An inked bridge
My feet black

I stop,
The black brush
Paints a crossroad

I sit,
days pass by
As I ponder

I decide,
A blackened path
Walking on ink

I wait,
The brush draws
More diverging paths

I reach,
Holding the brush
Snapping in half

I look,
My body covered
In black ink

I walk,
My body blackened
My path white

I climb this mountain
While my hands bleed true
I climb this mountain
Just for you

You are not between rocks
Or at mountain peak
I climb and bleed
So I don't seem weak

These bleeding hands
are not brave nor bold
I hope you know
They are only yours to hold

I climb this mountain
With no goal or plan
A bleeding testament
To the ego of man

You Exist
A Painting
Beautiful
Colorful
Vibrant

Love
You Used to
Now you
Only Remember
That you Should

What am I
To do
When Color
Turns Gray
Ash

People that we never met
Are becoming our best friends
Their loyalty and love is pure
Reminding us that we matter
In times when we forget it the most
Casually talking through years of our life
Instances far away suddenly matter
A person far away means the world

I woke up
In a dark place
With four goats around me
Dancing.

The dance was demonic
Satanic
Hallucinogenic
Static.

They moved
Yet stayed in place
They sang demonic tunes
Yet did not open their mouth.

I paniced
Screamed
Shivered
and finally ran.

I kicked one
and it Unfolded
Exploded
Into butterflies.

The other goats burst and shaped
Defaced
Recombobulated
A man.

The man had a mask
of Clay
My fist felt the clay
The clay felt my fist.

The mask
Shattered
Corroded
Disintegrated.

I saw fear
I saw dismay
I saw dread
I saw me.

He spoke
"Pathetic"
"Disgusting"
"I'm you? How cliche?".

I shook
I saw crows
I burst to butterflies
The crows ate me.

I was on the floor
I overdosed
I ****** up
I should do this again.

Demons play a tune
Silent as snow
A tune everyone does know
And no one is immune.

A tune you hear in battles
Battles of a different kind
The battles of the mind
A tune that makes people eat apples.

Many think it is a tune of sin
And cause you to wince
False, since
Demons play the violin.

I disobeyed my parents
And married her when I was younger

She seemed so shy and caring
but then she felt colder

She used to respect my space
but then she sat on my shoulder

She used to not criticize me
but  she eventually became bolder

I want to turn back time
And find someone else before I grow older.
------------------------
She put her dreams aside
And married me when I was younger

And when times were tough
I understood why she had to be colder

When I needed her
She was always on my shoulder

I was never that daring
So she turned bolder

I learned to love her
And appreciate her as I grew older.

They see you falling,
and say "look!, he's flying!"

They see you drowning
and say "look! he's reached new depths!"

They see your skin beginning to rust
and say "Get your **** together"

Do you ever look at a mirror
See where your scars should be
And think
"How did I end up here?"

You took the road less traveled
But you realized too late
Why you're alone
This road leads to nowhere.

You followed your dreams
Only to know that
Your dreams can't pay
For your partner's cancer treatment.

You stood out
And people saw you
You thought you were different
They knew you were a freak.

So the next time
You look in a mirror
Ask yourself
"Where would I be if I wasn't here?".

Little girl, why are you sad?
"I fell and cannot dance anymore"
Such a fragile thing little girls are
A little time and you can dance once again.

I walk
With a wooden smile
Simple to the crowd
Almost believable.

I cut myself
Where people cannot see
What horrors
I have done to myself.

I scream
For a minute
Then I laugh
For a minute.

I do not know
how to stop
The need to jump
Out of a moving car.

I try to control myself
I surround myself with people
I take my medications
I try to dance it off.

I get mad
When people do not know
How to help me
When I do not myself.

When I dance
I begin to see the truth
Only then I realize
I am only human.

Guardians
Defenders
Angels
Shields

Some want to protect
Who they love
They aspire to greatness
Solely for another.

Remember that after a war
Shields are forgotten
And guardians
Are considered monsters.

Do not be sad
when time has betrayed you
because,
dogs have always danced
on the bodies of lions.

Do not think
their dance gives them power,
for dogs stay dogs
and lions stay lions.

Lions die
out of hunger
while dogs eat
lavish meat.

Those ignorant
sleep on silk
while the wise
sleep on dirt.

Yet,
in the end
dogs stay dogs
and lions stay lions.

I don't understand this world
I felt broken when a friend
Became my enemy
I don't understand.

I felt broken
When the love of my life
Walked away as if nothing existed
I don't understand.

People tell me not to get attached
To simply let go
They find me weird, even weak.
I don't understand.

I do not understand
How people just "let go"
Like people are balloons
Ready to drift away.

I do not understand
How people find it normal
To not be attached
Who do they live for?

Am I the only one
That feels this way?
Do I exist to be alone?
Then why do I crave for attachment?

I do not understand
How such  mentality
Can be considered normal
Rather than sociopathic.

I do not understand
How a world where
Not being attached
can be nothing but ****** up.

I love you,
more than the most delicious barbecue steak.

I remember to talk to you,
more than I remember to wash my pants.

You mean so much to me,
more than all the cars and computer games combined.

You always make me laugh,
more than any clown ever did.

You made me understand the word "beauty",
more than any sunset ever could.

When you're gone,
I reach corners of my mind I rather keep closed.

You warm my heart,
more than any cover ever could.

You are the sister I never had,
more than you'll ever know.

Thank you, Soad.