What a two faced World we live in Too short for some things But too long for most Too competitive to be humble But too sensitive to boast So bright during the day And night too We help the world, or so we say But I really ask: who? There is love and hate Over the same thing From the same person In the same spring But never once Can something have it all That would go against nature But it would be quite a ball
"When you are loved by an artist, you are immortal," I paint the tips of your fingers with deep blue, and the ocean forms with a movement of your hand. Pretty, so very endlessly pretty. You make the elements of earth become even more endearing.
"You live in their every masterpiece, live in their every breath," I draw finishing touches on the edges of your mouth - that I want to kiss every moment - and shadows of despair form in the words that you let out. But they sound pretty, so very endlessly pretty. You make every word in the dictionary become even more meaningful.
"And when you hurt them, you live in their memories forever." I sew words into your skin and you wince in pain but you don't stop me. Thank you for making this easier for me.
We were lovers before we were friends In the sun that wore your skin Like a summer dress you didn’t hesitate to climb into my treehouse And decorate it with sparkly things You never bothered to ask If the trees limbs could hold us both Instead you acquainted me with your smile Pearly teeth, empty eyes Cross legged on the wooden floor Adorned in the oncoming light Your ringlets caught every ray that day When winter came I found you again Instead this time I was a coat rack And you filled my hands with blankets As we sat together watching the wind Talking about tomorrow. But your smile couldn’t hold the sun Instead your eyes met mine And I saw the cold outside I saw in you all the pretty things you liked Unfortunately I didn’t shine like them I couldn’t catch your eye So when you told me you loved me
When I met you every thing went quiet. I mean really quiet. So quiet my ears literally began to burn and buzz, and I didn’t know weather I should put my hands on the sides of my head or use them to clench my chest and mouth to keep myself from throwing up. When I saw you everything in my body began to separate. It was chaos....all the organs in my skin running bullet train style away from each other. My brain hit the top my skull my heart melted in to my shoes and my stomach well I think it went to a kegger and drank the whole thing itself in a corner! Oh my lord I was confused and it hurt, it hurt bad! We were at a baseball game, it was your girlfriends baseball game... your girlfriend who was also my (at the time but no longer not because of this but for different reasons)best friends playoff baseball game. Yep that’s the day you came in to my life full force like a flash ******* hurricane flinging glorious tiny white rectangles in to my soul with every uninterested grin and indifferent chunk of banter you tossed my way...I was absolutely enthralled!!! Utterly and disgustingly captivated by the magnitude of your glow. Did you even understand?! Do you even understand what you did that day?! I remember tracing the outline of your jawbone with my finger as I quietly sung songed your name from a few seats up and slightly to the left of where you and my bestie were sitting, when she, the girl we both loved for different reasons looked back and smiled at me through squinting eyes because I strategically placed myself in the direction of the sun, I sweetly smiled back at her through clenched teeth holding back anger and tears because someone who was not me was holding your hand.....why was she so lucky?! Why was I so unlucky?! Why?! I couldn’t understand the feelings I had. I mean I have never in my life ever wanted someone’s something more than I wanted you. I’ve never been jealous like ever and I’ve certainly never wished ill on one I cared for but right then at that moment I found myself cursing and spitting on the name of every woman who had ever had the audacity to let their skin meet with yours. Now I have always taken pride in my unshakable zest for all things flaky and fleeting ie my feelings towards everyone and everything. But you ruined me that day you broke my perfectly contented bland existence. I was fine some would say even happy being alone never knowing you existed! But from the moment I saw your wonderfully ****** adorable face I wanted to be with you to be by you to live laugh eat sleep dance bathe breathe grow old die with you. I wanted to know and be about everything about you.... I was obsessed! I am obsessed. So me being the logical and completely sane person that I am. I did what any logical and sane person would do.... I friend zoned myself, HARD. But not just that, I began to make myself like all the things you liked so I was someone you wanted around and I began to do things for you so you needed me around and carried myself in a way that was so non threatening so non ****** that I was totally excepted and loved by every not better than me girl that youve dated and even your current girlfriend who if I have to say I guess is pretty freaking dope and subsequently has become my friend as well through all fault of my own. And all this simply because I wanted, no I needed to stay by your side. And that folks is where I am today me yep awesome fantastic intelligent beautiful witty wonderful idiotic me, single and tortured, maybe forever because I’m in unrequited love with my totally oblivious now bestfriend. And because this is supposed to be a poem.... boy dear boy the only one who holds my heart closed eyes closed fist never to be mine not even from the start So terrified that I’ll lose you somewhere over time never saying what I want to cause my love and your rejection they just never seem to rhyme.
i fear the Summer for Dawn arrives early and her touch that rouses the sky sends you promptly to sleep while i am left alone in this blinding light
i fear the Autumn for when she approaches, the leaves that conceal my longing for your embrace gently fall to the terrain underneath
i fear the Winter for she strips me ***** and destroys the guise i made from the canopy of my brethren – the canopy that shielded my grotesque body and gnarled veins from your gaze
and i mostly fear the Spring for when the evening comes and the Wind sings her tune, sweeping my leaves into her trail, i wish for her to carry them to you where i am reminded once more that nothing on this land can reach you during the night (since this burning desire that shall remain as it is will never curtail our distance) and moreso during the day (when you slowly fade from my sight)
wew first piece for 2018 ! inspired while I was in the campus of ADMU