Moments of agony, desperation
and inarticulate screams
moments I lost myself in space, alienation
don't you abandon me too, please!
There were moments that I saw death
moments where my heart stopped for a while
All the world is spinning like crazy,
don't know what to do
while the thoughts in my head are racing
and I seem like a fool.
There is no one around here to save me
i feel alone
oh my God the demons come running across my mind, don't hate me!
to desperation I am prone,
I 'm feeling sick to the bone,
into a man I have not grown,
all I can do is shout and moan.
Our hearts will not allow us to complete the Journey without
Honestly and openly and truthfully.
Our heads will tell us to keep trying to anyway.
The Journey is long enough as it is.
Are heavy burdens to carry.
I lag behind
I noticed that I've become
A husk of who I was.
A void in the night.
Outshone by the light.
I feel so empty,
Like a thought of the past.
I'm in another dimension,
A wall of words separate us.
A chasm of words unsaid.
Lost words they are,
Just like me:
A shadow of the past.
One of my buddies/peers told the CCA group at whole that she felt 'like a shadow' during ourhat of fears time. I thereby dedicate this poem to her.
So I shall no longer defend
New kinds of love that you invent
Ever-changing list of demands
Keeps contradicting its own commands
After the sin quick to repent
With brief engagements in descent
Straighten all that you have bent
Amend what you're yet to amend
Letting those you left all depend
On your attention already spent
At each new encounter decadent
Your passion wasted on random men
Though fell, kept grace, that's evident
For what it's worth your growth is imminent
Freestyle written in 5 minutes.
I lay awake
And listen to the storm of my life
The trees of the past are scraping against the house
And the wild wind feels painful
It's rained for thirty days
My writing mothers me the way nothing can
or ever has or ever will
Unless it's myself
I talk to the shadow of the lamp in my room
The shadow of the lamp lit
only by a little moonlight
The moonlight is small like me
I'm left with nothing but rain
snails to look out for on the front steps.
in the good old days,
all we had were
words. We were full
of them. Yours, mine, theirs.
The words were good to us;
we respected them,
heard them, breathed
them. Lived them.
Then they were gone.
The other day I
to bring the good words
except none of mine rose up
to meet yours, and none
of yours but one broke
the silence. The brave,
one word - repetitively spoken and
asked by us both; "good?" "good."
Was it the cold that
froze our words, leaving
us with the first syllable of
The Last Word?
music makes no sound
food has no flavor
the sky either shines or rains
all the time remains taken
without you I have nothing
I'm stuck in the sea
Between you and me.
I swim relentlessly towards you,
but the sea never ends.
Tick tock and I forgot whom I'm longing for, and I'm lost in an unrelenting Ocean of dread and misery.
Not knowing my starting point nor my destination, I find myself drowning in my own desolation.
I hear my name echo like thunder,
But the song to you your voice resonates no more.
It lost its magic.
With all that surrounds me I feel nothing but blue. My mind no longer recalls what it means to be "Me and You".
Maybe had we met half way, I'd still know who "YOU" are.
And I see our friendship
Go down the drain
The past three years
All swept away in one go
And I felt regret
That I left you this way
But I felt freedom
Freedom from the cage you put yourself into
And you may twitter away
How I had betrayed you
But you left me first
And I never spoke
A friendship gone. We were friends. But they had gone too far and I wasn't okay with them anymore. I didn't want to deal with their toxic outlook anymore.