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harlee kae Sep 2014
I thought you were my best friend
because you promised you'd always love me and be around for me.
You promised I could always talk to you when I needed someone.
But I need someone right now and you aren't around.
I always saw the best in you..
But I guess you aren't one for keeping promises so I shouldn't be surprised.
*But I am.
Betrayal always shocks me. I really need to stop believing the best in people that are surely only going to let me down.
goodtea Nov 2018
taught. you.
how to be a monster

were shocked
when you
grew teeth

you. apologized
but they were
bleeding already

on weaponized smiles
and you. learned. to. rip. happiness.
out of sliced necks

fear and anger
sever your feet
run monster run

they teach you
new. cruelties.
bite. the.hands.
that.  fed.
I have a dilemma in heart and mind
My brain to me is so unkind
Do I suppress my evil thoughts
With a measly prescription, store bought?
I’m staying strong for him
But some days depression wins
And my anger bubbles up
So instead I wash it down with a cup
Of water and a little nauseating pill
It’s blue and powerful, it often makes me ill
I worry to start again
Because I could barely stop back then
It’s not worth the toll
So I flush them down the toilet bowl
I’m sick, I’m nauseous
My stomach is turning
Every time I see you
I’m filled with this yearning
You did this to me
I don’t know how I feel
Your eyes locked in mine
And I don’t know what is real
I don’t know who you are
I don’t know myself either
But this feeling you give me
I’m getting a fever
Gemma Jun 2018
I used to get excited over
the sound of heavy rain pelting the window frame ,
and the smell of freshly baked food that wafted through the halls of my house to the front door ,
or when my siblings and I got home from school just at the right time so I'd see them on the porch.
Little things meant a lot
But now a lot of things are best forgot
Because the rain that hit the window stopped,
the smell of the food now makes me nauseous,
and my sister and brothers no longer live under the same roof as me
The picture that's stained by my tears of them is the closest thing to those porch meetings that I've got .
Mari Jul 7
Anacondas and vipers
are the serious biters.
Cobras and mambas
can create deadly dramas.
Garden snakes and kingsnakes
tooth marks still ache.
Be cautious
or else you'll end up being nauseous.
Just wrote a quick poem to create awareness about how deadly snakes could be.
I think
what saves today’s commercial xmas hype
from being absolutely nauseous
is the wide-eyed joy of children
when they open their gifts
and find their dreams come true

a faint echo
of the joy in the eyes of the Kings
when after their long travails
they discovered the baby of their dreams
had miraculously become reality
Today while I was at work I saw a little girl grab some candy from the shelf and shake it in front of her mom to make sure she didn't forget to buy it. As she inched closer to the counter where I was scanning all of the items all I could see were the little girls eyes and the hands that hung on to the edge of the counter. She was so tiny and was still holding the candy in her hand, so excited. Liberated.

I don’t know why that made me so nauseous but all I knew was that this little girl was given a handful of years on this earth just like me. In that instant all I really wanted to do was stop time for this little girl that I knew absolutely nothing about and give her that opportunity to enjoy her candy bar to the very last crumb and let her lick clean the left-over smudged chocolate on her small fingers and small corners of her mouth.

I hope it pleases you to know that she did enjoy it, I didn't need to stop time for her to manage that. As kids, we don’t really have that extreme perception of time and maybe that’s what so beautiful about childhood and also what’s so tragic about what comes after.

I thought this girls whole life in a matter of seconds and I grew to appreciate that little girl. But she will never know this,  she will never know who I am, nor will she ever think of me again. But by the time she left the store I found myself hoping her life is everything she wants it to be.
Heavy Hearted Apr 2017
A - the atrocity that my life has become
D - the damage, and still,  im not done
D - the denial, the doom in the vile,  dangerous, daunting; forever defile
I - the image I fake of myself, I- my constant &chronic; bad health.
C- the cost of a chemical wealth.
T for the tension, paranoia and fear. Yet it’s the letter that symbols it’s here.  
I - irrational, insensible, intense. I - irresistible iridescence .
O- for the option that I didn’t take, O for the others that still I forsake.
And N for nervous. Nauseous. Night. N, the neophyte, turned narcissist knight.

Transparent to everyone, how its hold is too true
So clear its invisible, Addiction did coo:  

“when you wake and feel my crave,
and all my charms  different behave;
resistance, strength, pain & choice,
may mute my spell,  quiet my voice.”
“embrace what little light is shed”  suggested addiction, faintly he said:

“For I can **** the best man dead,
with only shadows in their head.”
It was here before I knew it
For some reason
The rain clouds parted
For the first time
In 8 years
And soon
The sun
Was out
The skies
Were blue
The music
Was loud
The air
Was warm
And I was smiling
For real
I was at dinner
With an acquaintance
And I wasn't nervous
I wasn't nauseous
I wasn't
And as I drove home
I gazed at the stars
And realized
I was happy
Really happy
No fake smiles
No masks
I had forgotten what that feels like
I can see
Clearly now
That things...
*Everything is going to be okay
I am officially medicated for my depression, and I had my first counseling appointment on Monday. It still feels...wrong... different. I forgot what it's like to be happy. It still feels temporary, but I just...I'm happy and I know it won't last forever, but I feel warm in my soul. I want to read and write and go on adventures and hike and I don't know how long this feeling will last, but it safety.
madyson shaye Apr 2014
if you walked a thousand miles in my shoes you still
would not have any room judge me
where'd that idea come from, anyway?
that because you see what I see and walk where
I walk you have the power and knowledge to
write a book of every mistake I've ever made
and set it right outside of the gates of heaven
so that when my time comes I know it was your
words that left me dead?
people are not god's
you grew up reading mythology, watching the half-human
Hercules build a wall on top of his shoulders and carrying
it even throughout his most human times
I grew up reading poetry, memorizing the beauty of
metaphors to the point where I decided that when I grew up
I would become one and everything I do would be one
no wonder we have such different outlooks on life.
if someone put a knife through your back, you would die
you are not immortal because people are not gods
so why allow them to do what they do?
I told myself you would never make me sick again, ever
let me have a 105 degree fever and a pain in my shoulder
before I ever get nauseous remembering what happened
what was said or what we both did, but when I went to
the doctor and begged him to cure me he just filled his
syringe up with a photographic memory and inserted it
directly into my veins whispering
people are not god's
people are not god's
if you want to became the hands on a clock learn to
add and subtract and memorize when the sun rises and sets
if you are dead set on becoming something no one can
touch without crumbling to a pile of dust
breathe deep and walk tall
move as if your spine is made of words
that were said in such a fragile time that if you distribute
your weight improperly the tightrope will break
act as if it is never a fragile time
even though it is 99% of the time, but say it's not
say it's all just fine until your mind is snickering because
it has convinced the rest of your body it's able to keep running
people are not gods, people are not gods
people are just people and that's all they'll ever be
a mere five and a half feet, unless you allow them to
put on stilts and start walking around in your head
CAM Oct 2017
Today is one of those days that makes you feel just nauseous
Today is not a very good day to be so self-conscious
Today is one of those beatdown days
The days that make think you’re in a phase
Of life.

Today is like the day you find your crush kind of hates you.
Today is the day you’re almost starting to hate food.
Today is not the kind of day you just give up and faint
Into the arms of some unwilling, kindly saint.

You think today couldn’t be worse but just imagine how it could.
Actually never mind it’d be stranger if you would.
Today is one of those days you think is about to **** you.
But maybe that’s just because you aren’t seeing the whole view.

Today is one of those days that makes you just a little bit cautious.
Today is one of those days you wish you had something like phosphorus.
Although I'll never say it loud,
I think my story I have found.

Today might be a beatdown, but you have to see tomorrow.
Because sunrises are beautiful to take pictures of.

So I hope I see you tomorrow.
zebra Apr 5
soul mates
in mud pomade
each one half of the other

a headless body
and a bodiless head

two monsters
severed halves of a snake

the head with no heart
ravaged with criminal ambition

and she; the heart; a pulsing ache, headless
made him nauseous with her ceaseless churning
ocean of darkened milk

disjuncture of passed and future
a gnashed twig
time shattering time

slamming doors in each other's faces
through a disaster of eternities

on a black ash stair case
they ate the light of the world

a death fascination
yet could not die

and all was night
blind oblong
a brailled egg

in a curse of dreams
shadows desperate for love
they never find

snake wedding
a poem of rahu and ketu
olivia anne Apr 13
i used to be filled
with swarms of tickling butterflies-
a nervous, nauseous feeling that accompanied me everywhere i went,
along with the intense feeling that one of you might be somewhere up ahead.
now all i feel
is the autonomous cycle of my breath
and my pulse,
no longer too fast.
Matilda Feb 11
I am trapped,

Not under lock and key
Not in a room with just me.

But in a place filled with persons
I am muted, their laughter worsens

I try to shout I try to cry
But I have been solidified.

I feel sick
Nauseous from my own mind.

My brain is the room I am trapped in
My thoughts the kin.
Penelope Winter Aug 2017
It had been a rough couple months.
You lost your money and your car, your lungs found it tough to breathe through the smoke you pumped into them.
So you made love in the club with the stud you found at the bar.
You were just making the pain go away, but only temporarily. Because you knew he wouldn't call you. You knew the smell of whiskey in his hair would wash out of yours in the shower, but hours later you could still taste pieces of him between your teeth.

It wasn't love. He never left you his name, he just left.
Left you in the washroom standing in a pile of your clothes on the floor that smelled of alcohol and regret. You went home, kicked off your heels (he wasn't your first one night stand). Somehow, days later you still felt nauseous in the morning.
You started gaining weight, your head was pounding like a jack hammer.
It had been a rough couple of months and you felt so alone.
But now, I'm here with you, loving you without ever seeing your face.

You made love in the club with the stud who left you with nothing but this feeling in your gut that my life was a mistake, as you hold the little stick in your hand. Two little lines.

Your lungs are turning darker with every year you grow older.
The only lessons you learned on love were to leave mommy alone with her bottle and stop asking where daddy went.
Your job at the restaurant down the street is hardly enough to get by.

And now... two little lines. Sitting like a pause button on your life.

Maybe I'm the roadblock that keeps you from your fourth pack of the day.
Maybe I'm too time consuming,
Maybe I'm a burden.
But maybe we have an adventure in front of us,
Maybe I'm the answer to your loneliness,
Maybe I'm your motivation to get back on your feet.

I could change the world
I could save lives
But I won't get the chance
If you leave me to die.

Whatever I am, or could be, please keep me.

Because these two little lines love you more than any whiskey stained stud ever could.

It's been a rough couple months.
But Mommy
Give me a chance to live.
Give me a chance
To love you.

- p. winter
mannley collins Nov 2018
I opened the page and read through the book.
Its title was --Hello Poetry!!.
BUT!! and this is a big BUT!!
It turned out to be overall a PRETTY but juvenile competition as to who could write the most rubbishy so called
'poems' in the Universe!!!
But to my amazement there was an even deeper malaise.
It was a cover for a competition to discover who could write most nauseous strings of meaningless associated words praising the brain dead scribblers of this twee juvenile ******* with **** licking adjective after **** licking adjective.
Emotional cripples all!!.
Do any of you really belive the **** you write is 'poetry'??? REALLY!!!!
I mean---come on!!
ymmiJ Apr 15
the carcass sailed in
nauseous tide, fully seasoned
frenzied ***** fidget
whales heading north means spring, time for death and new life
jeanette korbel Mar 2015
I am not scared and I will be strong. I’ve been lonely for ten years and now, I can see what has been gone. I am taken to a different place, far from home. The plane took me high and soared until things got low. I walked down the hallway of doom and distress. This wouldn't be a problem if he had never left. Walk into a room thats plain yet, engaged in activity. A conveyor belt and tags that say names, scrambled in my mind going their separate ways. I tell myself to focus and find my bags from here. The voices and the noises distract me, nothing has been clear. I see my name as nauseous as I can be. My stomach has taken a turn on me.

I find my bag and look around my vision is blurred and I can not hear a sound. I see his face threw the sea of people. Wearing the same flannel sweater he had ten years ago. He dominates the atmosphere with his torn up pants and his messed up hair. He looks the same but his hair is receding. His face is drooped down like paint that just won't dry. He grew tall but skinny like a plant that has withered. His face is pale but his eyes are rich brown. He has a genuine smile with teeth that had fallen out.
I walk up to this man I haven't seen in years we looked at each other and, we burst out in tears. Even though I don’t know him, I remember his face. From ten years passing by I’d imagine he's changed. He use to be plump and his face well rounded now it looks like he had been beaten by thoughts and loneliness. I can tell when he seen me his life already got better. He couldn’t stop talking like he was gone for forever. I talked right back to him because, I know how it feels.

I look back on all the years without him and realized we feel the same. The difference is he made the choice of being alone ,I had no need to be left. I felt lost my whole life, until he came back. Lost from what I can’t quite figure out. I just needed to feel the feeling of him being around. We walked out the crowded place and, went on from there. No one really changes, he still smelled like beer. You think someone would give up the little things for something so big. I left a couple days after, and haven’t seen my dad since. He chooses to be lonely and, I still suffer from it.
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