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chrissy who Jun 22
Half of my stupid brain can
Logic it out,
How we got here.
The other
Half
Is ruthlessly sad.
chrissy who Jun 20
Do you still read these?
Am I writing to you, or just for you?

How are you so far gone,
But still residing so persistently
In my head?

How can my heart hold so much fury
And so much pain
And so much hope?

Your words....
Your texts. It sounded like you're re-writing our history.
Could I have been there for you?
You told me not to be there.
You told me to get out.
I didn't want to.
But I listened,
I wanted to respect you.
Your message has me feeling like
Once again
I should've fought harder.

But no
That would not have ended well for either of us.

The truth of the matter is
That you've tied me to your divorce
Whether you know it or not
And I will never be able to cut that tether.
No matter how much I still love you,
You'll probably never see me without seeing that pain.

****.
I need to stop reading your months-old words.
They don't apply, here, anymore.
chrissy who May 24
N: how did you know?

M: she wants her lifeless body dealt with the same way I do - her useful bits given to those who need it, the rest returned to the earth. in the form of a tree.

N: you base this **** on things after death?

M: well....she also wants to live the same way I do. similar enough ideals for cohesion, with enough difference for intrigue and growth. we have a lot to work on but...she feels like the home I want to work on it all in.
chrissy who Apr 17
I want to reach back out
But I don't even know what I'd say.
Don't know how to not scare you away.
chrissy who Mar 29
My heart still crunches when I think about you. Your imprint has not faded. Not clearly, nor fully. Will you ever know how close we were?
chrissy who Mar 9
I feel like I
Lived a thousand lifetimes with you.
Yet we are apart, and
Have been
For a while.

Do you think in another plane
Our trajectory continued?
chrissy who Feb 19
We all had to be a little selfish.
Is it our fault that
It was the end of Us?

It's sad that
These days it seems no one can hear
Past the screaming inside their own
Head.

I don't know how to forget to
Look at your
Horoscope.
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