CAM May 1
It's kind of weird to think.
About how people change.
But it's not generally because of themselves.
Unless they mean it to be.

People around you.
Input pieces of their souls
Into everyone around you.
Every day.

Isn't it weird to think about?
Maybe you saw his fingers tapping,
Or her biting her lip,
Or them saying something that made you laugh.

And then a few weeks later,
You find yourself doing the same thing.

People input pieces of their souls
Into everything they do.
In an English essay, you can hear their voice,
In the way they write.
If you listen hard enough.

If you read the things I write.
You can tell little things about me.
Like the fact that I see the good in people,
And the fact that I'm young and in school.

Or the fact that the characters I write about
They exist everywhere in my mind.
My friends are often in my words,
Speaking through everything I say.

My words shape who I've become,
And the things I do become less fun,
Until you realize your soul is spreading too,
When you see someone reading a poem.

When you see someone covering their face with their hair,
Or reading the book you just read.
When you see someone who's singing classic rock,
Looking at you once again.

If you see someone copying your stride,
Or the way you hold your bags.
Or the way you mess with your fingers as you're nervous.
Just know it's not you who's inside.

We're all different people,
Sharing our souls,
Not knowing exactly where they're going,
Not at all.

Yet it's not hard to tell who someone is.
From the pieces of soul you find.
CAM Apr 17
Oh how does time stop when I look at you

The stars shine only for you in the night

What could I do when I’m in love with you
Without a single reason in my sight


The memories we have together rise

And dance across my mind in the moonlight

Your eyes are amazing green orbs, my prize
Until death can take its ever so cruel bite

If time can stop when I look at your smile
How does time resume when I speak to you
Because you make life worth it all the while
Without you, I feel so lost and so blue


The stars shine for you in the dark night sky
I pray that we won’t have to say goodbye
This is a sonnet written for my best friend by his girlfriend and she sent it to me, telling me I could post it, and honestly, it makes me really happy how happy she makes him and how amazing they are together.
CAM Apr 11
Maybe I wish I wasn't wrong so often.
Especially when I feel a lot like I'm right.

When I'm with my friends,
It's easy to tell what they do,
And why.

With people I'm getting to know,
I notice things most people don't,
Although sometimes I presume people do.

It's weird that I can do all that,
But I can't even tell if you like me or not.

And now I feel stupid,
Because you don't quite feel the same.

Be happy,
My friends say.
It's not like he hates you.

And I know that.
We're friends,
And I know you.

But that doesn't mean
I enjoy being wrong.

And maybe it's hard to admit it sometimes,
When you're wrong it just doesn't feel right.
But sometimes you are,
And you have to admit it.

Even if you hate being wrong.
CAM Mar 13
I can feel the tears on my cheeks,
My lips,
My clothes.
They drip down to cover me,
In the one thing that reminds me that I'm still here.

I can feel the racking sobs,
My chest feels compressed,
And that familiar lump resides in my throat.

I can hear the mantra,
Running through my head.
Why?
Why?
Why?

Why am I still here?
Why am I the one who's like this?
Why am I not the good enough one?
Why am I not happy?


Why am I like this?
Why am I doing this?
Why can't I get over the dramatics?
Why do I feel overdramatic for having emotion?


Why does this always happen?
CAM Mar 8
I missed it.
This feeling of happiness.
This feeling of strength
And that little burst of joy.
Each time you pop into my head.

But I didn't miss people.
"He's not good enough for you."
"He's into bad stuff"
"I thought you were a rule follower."

I don't miss that, not at all.
I don't miss being criticised,
Every time I try to be happy.
Every time I think of your face.

I miss thinking about the way we first met.
Letting that memory and others flood my mind.
Every single time I'm bored.
Your hair, voice and manner are all adorable.

And I miss thinking someone is adorable.
I miss thinking of someone when I get good news.
I miss talking to someone and letting it get better every day.
I miss talking to someone and almost not going to bed on time.

I missed talking to someone,
To take my mind off the day.
Or even just to make a good day better.
My day is tiring, and you tell me to sleep.

And that's what I miss the most.
Having someone who cares.

But of course,
"You're going to get hurt."
Is the only thing I hear.
CAM Mar 7
What's going on inside me?

I feel something in my gut like
Something that's wrong?

Then again, almost everything
Has been making today worse
I don't know what it is about today.
But nothing is going right.

My friends all seem to hate me
My crush hasn't said a word.
My family feels like it's falling apart,
This couldn't get much worse, I'm sure.

Except for the fact that it's snowing outside.
What if someone gets hurt?
It looks like a blizzard,
But it's March.

I have practice tonight, until nine o'clock.
I have a tournament right after school.
Today makes me feel like I need to leave.
My head is saying to go.

But wow. It's weird.
To be cast out and lonely
For one day. For people to ignore
Your feelings and then ask them the next day

It's weird talking to your crush
Having that confidence,
Starting a conversation you
Didn't think you could

It's weird how your bad days
Only make you better.
It's weird how the things that could kill you
Can make you stronger instead

The things you told yourself
You couldn't lose
Are the things you're willing to fight for
The things that push you to the limit.
CAM Feb 20
God. How am I still not okay?

God. It's been so long.

God. I'm so tired of life right now.

God. What happened to me?

I was such a nice kid.
I was calm all the time.
Mature for my age,
Little but so lively.

I was so helpful.
So loyal.
I always supported my trust.
But I never really spoke my mind.

I was shy.
I was small.
I never stood up for my feelings
I never stood up for myself.

And now I'm older.
I realize I don't need support.
I need myself.
I need confidence.

Speaking your mind is not wrong.
Standing up for your feelings isn't rude.
Standing up for yourself isn't mean.
Saying what you feel doesn't make you imperfect.

No one's perfect. Not even them.
The ones you hate for being so amazing.
Maybe she has anxiety.
Maybe his mom is alcoholic.

No one has a perfect life.
There's not one perfect family in the world.
There is not a person in the world who's perfect.
There's not a person who doesn't have one bit of strife.

But just because you aren't perfect.
Doesn't make you less worth it.
You're amazing.
You're still charming, kind, and strong.

You're just more experienced.
You just understand some more things now.

And maybe, just maybe,
You just aren't as shy anymore.
I'm not perfect. But I'm not shy anymore either.
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