austin 2d
my monsters are silent
no one hears my screams
these demons are violent
and they conquer me in teams

look into my eyes,
my synthetic smile,
I'll hide what underlies,
crying's not my style

Through the thick I drag these chains
chronic mental pains
Over me my demons reign
misery my veins contain

Through the dust I try to see
the lifeless creature that is me
I'll set fire to these trees
and my life, I will seize
Its that feeling you get on the brink of a rough patch
You rush back to the drinking and just crash
You act different, distant and drunk as...
One bad binge then you blink and the cuffs latch
You drink booze, snooze and withdraw
Usually fall, puking and refusing to crawl
Wake up no memories confused at it all
Then a tear surfaces with nervousness
The darkness reemerges, asking is it really worth this
Na but pretend its fun
So fun you don't need a friend when your drunk
Just a loner on a balcony tempted to jump
To mend it with a thump can end it at once
Some days we trip when it rains
Cause the brain can slip
But staying strong though it
Hope someone related to this
Brenna Comer Mar 2
the scabs heal
leaving behind faint pink marks
over time the pink fades
only saying hello in the shower
you’re proud
because you’ve been clean
for over a month

but out of the corner of your vision
a silver gleam catches your eye
your blade lies on your desk
whispering sweet nothings to you
gingerly, you pick up your razor
and tenderly fondle the edges
caressing the red tinted tip

first you tell yourself:
“i’ll only make a scratch”
which progresses to
“i’m fine as long as i don’t bleed”
“fuck it”
as you slice yourself like bread
and warm blood drips down
alongside tears
for you’ve relapsed once again
Liv Stefoski Mar 2
i told myself
that i'd never
do it again
yet here i am
skyler Mar 1
i crave you
like an addict
searching for their fix
oh sweetheart
has never tasted so sweet

Tina Feb 22
I creep towards a flicker of light
No sheets to keep me from the callous cold
My bare flesh introduced to the February night
Transfixed by the light, my eyes swim and glitter
I rush away from the old creaking bed, away from that shell.
Where he gifted me memories of dust, dark and bitter.
I flee my partner in crime, my everlasting disease
As he fast sleeps, ready to make love to my brain
But I rush and feel no rush between my legs increase.
Stars wave and a bird flies home, I sigh in relief.
For I too go home, somewhere under the sky.
As I smile to spring away, I sense something in disbelief.
A pair of hands gripping my arms and neck.
Just to believe it was over, oh heck!
Mass product these days! Can't help writing. This poem is about my disease, which as I view it, loves to grip my brain.
Tøast Feb 14
I tried. You must know.

I tried.
But when you left, you were replaced by an old friend.

I tried.
A demonic being, darker than your eyes.

I tried.
But the blade looked clean, and the lines I painted gave my friend room to breathe.

But i tried.
I can hear them again,
I can hear the voice.
They are calling me out,
To make the choice.

They want me to start,
To use again.
They telling me to end,
End all the pain.

I know this numbing high,
The brown slop.
I know they are right,
It makes it stop.

They are screaming listen,
The voices are back, the demons the ones who tell me to do things.

couldn’t resist a minute more.


I again…

After six months sober


in this pain I know all too well.

Four years lost to this drug, my veins ache for.

First breath in the morning and last thought at night all consumed by it,

Every cell in me craves it.

That physical euphoria my body portraits.

Feels like someone has poured pure joy into every single muscle and fiber of my being.

It makes me feel so content

I am literally in love the entire world.

Every single bit of me is singing and buzzing with life and love.

It’s like the ecstasy of orgasms. That first, blissful, pleasurable pulsation of endorphin's and serotonin.

Is what I feel when I first take LOVE.

And then,

And then, the honeymoon stage is over.

Fights erupt,

never-ending debates,



no trust,



“I’m done”

Again, it feels like a part of my soul is leaving my body.

Again, sitting here numb.

A toxic love

I’m addicted too,

And there’s no way around it.

It’s already deep intertwined with my veins.

Yet no matter the toxic tragic event that happened before, I sit here, and I want nothing more than to spend my life next to this soul.

To see his eyes unchanged as the skin around it wrinkling and old, is what my heart will always desire, to stare at those eyes for the rest of eternity.

Eyes like black holes, an empty black void but with every lingering stare I feel compelled to get closer.

I’m lost in the vast abyss of his soul, fell hard and there was no way of escaping it.

Dead air…

So here I’ll wait, until you decided to come into my life again and repeat this déjà vu.
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