"I love you"
Just kidding
Neither is it "I hate you"
I don't have feelings for you
So stop holding on
And move on

Could it be
You're asking me
To go on a date
With you?

Perhaps, you are mistaken.
I'm not that easy.
But,
so shall I accept your request.

At first it was okay
But then it became all gray.

To simply put,
it was a disaster.

But I found something better,
the effort you put into the date
is something I've come to admire
And now you've become my desire.

The thrill of your lies
Keeps me up all night
You think I'm stupid
But apparently
It's you
For your lies don't bother me
Now that I've come to get you

I was given choices
Of whom I want to pick
You weren't one of them
So I chose none
'Cause even if the choices were better than you
They can't be the you who I know

I love you
I love you
We keep saying that
Without even meaning it

By the time I grow up
You will no longer be my hero
Even if you were once
Someone has your place now
But that doesn't mean you're not in my heart

One day,
I'll get to the other side.
One day,
I'll be able to see you.
One day,
I'll be able to say,
I am yours and you are mine.

Run run run
Run fast fast fast
There's no one to hold you down
Run run run
Run fast fast fast
But time
Oh time can slow you down
Run run run
Run fast fast fast
It's too late
There's nothing you can do
Stop stop stop
There's no point in running now
For what you're living for
Has been crushed
Shatter shatter shatter
You can hear the pieces of your life breaking
No more time
No more life
And now
Bye bye bye

Look at me now
Look at who you've stumbled upon
I was once a weakling
But now no more
For those who've trampled upon me
Shame on you
'Cause I'm no longer a joke
And now you are

The pain you gave
Was like a thousand bullets being shot
Stop
I understand now
So please
Go away
Far from here
So that I won't have to give in to pain anymore

You're like a dash of paint
In a new canvas
Bringing color to my world
Because of the love you give

Crime scene near the house
Police rushing to that place
Me locking every single door
Oh what else could I do
Grabbed every single thing that could be a weapon
Even things that aren't effective
Scared that these evil doers will come at my door
Countless thoughts keep coming at me
I'm seriously praying the rapture would come instead

words that are hard to say,
thinking it would ruin your day.
because of all the smiles you had,
i still want to make you glad.
but i know you know,
wherever my feelings go.
but you still smile,
even for a while,
even if you're slowly breaking,
even while your heart is aching.
i want to say goodbye
but my words come out as a lie.
whether it's loving you
or saying i do,
stop smiling,
  you're a fool.
  i only do bad things to you.

In my hand
is a photograph
A picture of a memory
A memory I keep clear
Cause it holds a picture
Of me and you

The sound of music coming through
And all the thoughts that seems to be
I listen to every word
Happiness. Sadness. Anger.
All these emotions coming through

But sometimes there is no sound
No thoughts coming in
No anything at all
Just silence
Maybe that silence resembles loneliness
Or maybe sadness
Because hearing no sound just is another way of not bothering
'Cause everything already feels like a bother to you

Not being able to face it is one thing.
Getting over it is another.
But on second thought,
  why even bother?
When it's only been a day
  or the other.

There are pretty people in this world
But why do we say we are ugly
We are ugly, fat losers
We're useless beings
But that's where we are wrong
Everybody's got potential at some part of this world
Maybe yourself being weird
  is a talent.
Everybody's just got pessimistic these days
That's why we can think of our dark futures
Rather than our bright ones
And everything's about being so down
Like,
  why start thinking 'bout being depressed?
You're the one who's up to making feelings like that

Never mind the world
Never mind my life
I've lost it
I've completely lost my self now
Oh I'll live without a care
I'll live seeing the dark skies
There is no sun dawning tomorrow for me
Welcome to my own misery

she is the devil
always ******* on about her crap
doesn't understand the commoner's way
thinking she should be #1
***** her and her ****
let her have fun in hell
freaks like her deserve worst things

Rain
Though it seems gloomy at first
But the cold weather just suits the atmosphere
To make the outside a bit quiet
And make me feel so calm

I don't care about you anymore

More like I shouldn't care about you anymore
Because no mater how much I try to bear
It never brings me peace anyway

But my heart keeps beating too fast
And I can't control my emotions
I'd just like you to
Think about me every once in a while
Would you?

I may be rich
But I'm not a *****
Stop pushing me in
To those like trash bins
Don't want to be judged
Or hold any grudge
Please hear me out
Before I pout

Instead of hiding in this place of nothingness
Let's go run to a place of brightness
A place we can have fun
Particularly, under the sun
Maybe have love blossom
Love is also awesome
But let's keep running
And never stop smiling

School is a bore
I wish there was more
The people around me
Feels like a wide open sea
It's hard to swim out there
With so much to bear
I simply wish it was easy
Instead I feel kinda queasy
Sometimes it's fun
But I still want to run
To my sweet escape
Even with my expression of gape

Who are you to tell me I'm no good?
***** you
And your classy ways
I'd rather be a pig
Than a trained dog
Be myself
And just let life
Take me far away in this universe of gray

The secrets I keep
are deep.

I'd say
it's better to keep it at bay.

But you insist
And now you can't resist

The girl who was once a stranger
is now a danger
To You.

That day I realized something obvious.
Something obvious but something I have neglected.
****
I use distractions as ways to feel fine.
But reality hits you,
   it hits you hard.
You think you could get by easily
  but getting to the point of people asking why.
Why are you like this.
Why are you like that.
God, shut up.
I don't want to hear anymore.
I also ask myself why.
I didn't want to be like this. I never asked for gray clouds to cover the skies above me.
But, well, **** that. My mind's ****** up.
Heavens didn't like this either.
I'm not a failure but neither am I a success.
I lost my self in this loathing zone. Such a pity but ******* ******. Sigh.
God, I hate myself.

The feeling of longing for
But knowing that just reasons
Aren't enough to admit
These feelings of mine
Cannot come clear
Your touch
Your gaze
Your smile
Your love
Your everything
I want to keep it
I need to have it
But you're just one step too far

I don't know what to do when I'm in front of you
I tend to get nervous about your every move
I don't mean to be so tense
Just want to know what must be done
My heart shakes because of you

I try to act different when you're around
I don't want you to hate me
I really like you
How can you shake up my heart furiously?

I know they're just your friends
And I know that they don't mean anything to you
But even if you say I'm yours
Should I be jealous of others?

We all know the word ship
Like when you pair these two people together
Now I've settled down with many ships
And some of them be fictional
While others involve existent people
I wish they stay together
But I know the harsh reality
But some of them really do
And that ship sails far away

You are annoying
For you are toying
This mind of mine
Or the other minds of nine

Stop being silly
'Cause it bothers me really

I hate you for it
I don't seem to like you one bit

I smile when I'm happy.
  Most people would.
But,
I also smile when I'm sad.
"Why of all silly things did this happen?"
When I'm embarrassed.
"Oh God, everybody's laughing. Okay, just laugh with them. Haha."
When I'm angry.
"You don't know what's gonna happen to you, *****."
When I feel lonely.
"Where are people when I actually need them?"
When I just don't know what to do in life.
I smile a lot.
So I don't think people could tell.
I'm not one to express something in the right way.

Sometimes, I just have the urge to curse at you.
But I just can't say it .
Obviously, I'm scared of being scolded.
But I really want to hit you with a truck
And say "goodbye"  forever to you.
But it's not that simple.
Especially that you're close to me.

There are easy words.
There are difficult words.
But then again,
It's easy to spell love.

Love, L-O-V-E.
It's a simple four letter word.
But how come the definition isn't all that easy.
You know it's a feeling.
But we don't know how to explain that feeling.
Because it all depends on those who feel it.

I met you on one Spring day
The world started blooming that day
The winter coldness passed
The ice of my heart started melting
You were the one to replace
The one in my heart's case
Your hand branched out to me
And I held on to it
Days passed
Spring's come to last
Summer's coming
And so our story meets a new chapter

I talked to a stranger
It was a gross conversation
But nevertheless fun
Talked about lewd things
Ended up with learning new stuff
I'd keep in mind
That green conversation we had
Could it be useful
For other stuff

I like you a lot,
  but I love my friends.
I look at you from afar,
  yet she looks at you near.
I sit beside you,
  but she talks to you more.
I stayed closed in my spot,
  yet she could be open about it.

She likes you a lot
  and she's my friend.
She's obvious about it
  and I'm here for support.
She's been with you longer
  and I've only known you for a while.
She'd be a good match for you
  and I'll be here at the sides.

The thought of you laughing
is just simply ridiculous
'Cause you won't be laughing
in a sweet moment
The time my revenge
will come out fresh
Shall make me avenge
for the jokes you've played on me

I talk to myself.
Always in the bathroom
  to my reflection in the mirror.
Sometimes even laughing,
  sometimes even crying.
I don't think it's weird.
I'm sure there are others like me
    Or maybe not?

Feelings I kept locked.
Knowing they'll only hurt others,
But being oblivious to what love really is.
I hope to find whatever it is,
And that would be true love indeed.
Like a gentle touch of hands, the warmth of embraces,
Or the feeling of soft lips brought together.
I beg to know what my heart is beating for,
And why I feel so high without even doing anything.
Teach me ways to catch your heart
So that I can finally feel that hundred percent of your love.

You came crashing at me
  the first time I saw you.
You were so perfect
  I didn't know what to do.
My life was ever so poor
  I'll never catch up to you.
Cause loving you felt like
  I was being sent off to the moon.
You were too fragile to be mine,
  too expensive.
But you came to be free to me
  I called it a miracle.
Before you,
The universe was so boring
  but you then said it was just my imagination.
  For the universe is everything but boring
  because exciting fate exists in that universe
  and that's what brought me to you.