she slowly escapes the pain she was trapped in
rises up like an eagle
soars above the rotting lies that once weighed her down  
and lets go of her past

shut up
i don't want to hear it
i don't care what you have to say
you don't know me
you don't want to know me
i'm better off without you

a nod of acknowledgement
as you walk past
that's all i get from you now
once you were my everything
now we are merely strangers

you seem to know
exactly who you are
and i find that beautiful
but i cannot
find who i am
i don't know where to begin
to discover myself

tearing apart at the seams
she wanted to break free
instead
she had broken
fallen into a heap
and couldn't put herself back together

today is a new day
a fresh start
new feelings
starting again
be bold
make today your day

it's not easy
to love your broken parts
it is easier
to just hate them
and wish them away in your mind
but you can heal
and you will heal
love those broken parts
mend them with your heart

what i have
is a wounded soul
but
my heart
is slowly opening again
to new things
to old things that feel new
i place my stale thoughts in a jar
and close the lid
i say "no more"
it is now
time for loving
and rediscovering myself
and redesigning myself
i let the pain hurt
but i don't let it define me
it's time to start living again

awkward silence
uneasiness in the dead quiet
tension fills the room
stale air
no escaping

freely wandering
listening to the birds sing
breathing in the cleansing morning air
why can't life always feel this peaceful

driving too fast through the countryside with the windows down
that's how it is talking to you
absolute freedom
completely filled with a sense of belonging
you are home

people that have their lives planned out scare me

crystal clear thinking
is not for me
i see life as a blur
full of happy and sad moments
wondering whether things lead to better things
having days of complete and utter sorrow
then days of hope and a sense of self again
my life is not a routine
it is not structured
i think
i will just keep moving forward
slowly
until the pieces of my life
are put together

passed memories
what good is a blurred compliment
"you were once good at this"
so i am now a failure
and have lost what made me worth something
i guess i will never be good enough in your eyes

oh you flew by
before i could say hi
you existed
only for a fleeting moment
what if i had stopped time
and made you mine

music stops
curtains are drawn
now
the show's over
no more performance
it's real
real life
who are you
when you're off the stage
back in your home
alone

you caught me like a bunch of roses
thrown from a bride on her wedding day

his strength is his virtue
he carries the world on his shoulders
still his eyes are filled with light
he is at ease
in control of his weighted life
he does not collapse
ever
he prospers

just let yourself go
fall right into freedom
do the things that make you feel
invincible
beautiful
unapologetically you

laying here alone
thoughts aren't of you
they aren't really of anything
minds a blur
i am content with focusing
on completely nothing

i don't know the person
that i once was
i don't know the person
that i want to be
i have no idea
who i am
but one day
i will know

kind of over it
feeling really gross
and like worthless
i am not good at anything
i am just really lonely
all the time
and yeah

no you don't get it
this is not me
someone has stolen
the person you see

you always believed in the thought of tomorrow
trusting the hope of somebody
who never cared
love became twisted and dark
a blur of thoughts with no resolution
after all this time you are still so afraid
of being without him

you're fat you're fat you're fat
get skinny get skinny get skinny
i hate myself
i hate not looking the way i want to
i hate looking into mirrors
i hate my reflection
i try to get thinner
nothing ever works
i give into emotion
ugh
what is wrong with me

okay okay okay
i am not who you wanted me to be
let's face it
i never will be
but i made a promise
to start being true to myself
and if you can't respect that
i don't need you around

you made my days brighter
like really
things were so much better
when i was yours

lay with me
under the stars
tonight
they shine ever so brightly
for you and i

somebody please
grasp my failing heart
make it beat again
in a way that goes on and on forever
make me believe
that this is not the end
give me love
enough love to keep me alive

sipping my coffee
listening to my favorite songs
wishing my afternoon away
drifting off to a place far from here
full of freedom and loving
i don't want to leave

i wish things were better
if only i could change it all

head aching
thinking about being skinny
being happy with my body
knowing i look good
and feeling fit
ugh
i wish i was thinner

listen up kid
don't you take your life for granted
you won't be this young forever
with a carefree state of mind
do what it is you love
and be grateful

falling into a heap
i close my eyes
damp walls surround me
world
let me be

just don't stop
a little goes a long way
trust me
i know it's hard
just do a little bit more everyday
and soon everything will fall into place

take time away from the world
to let yourself grow alone

sometimes a little bit of nothingness
is quite necessary
time to sit and ponder
alone with your thoughts
in silence

you tore a piece of my heart out
and carried it with you
as you wandered off
and found yourself a new lover
you cold man

stolen hearts
broken minds
twisted words
painful truth

grab your guitar
play me a song
pour out your heart's delicate feelings
melt me with your warm lyric
spark the fire within my wearied soul
enchant me
with your love song

we had a spark
i swear it
how
how come these days
we are as strangers
never once sharing secrets
doing things that lovers do
truth is
we will continue to drift
apart
you may forget me
completely
but i will always think of you
always

i want a long night
spent with the moon
maybe he'll listen
to my twisted thoughts
give me kind words
to carry with me
'til the morning breaks
and for the days to come

look i guess it's all a bit much
for you to handle
understand
comprehend
but i want you to listen to me
help me through this
i need your love and care
you mean the world to me
you must believe me
and i don't want you going anywhere
please say you will stay right here
with me tonight

search yourself
dig deep into your heart
know yourself
love your soul entirely

trying to mend myself
i have been told i must love myself
before i can love anybody else
i believe it, it's true
it is also very painful
being so alone
i try and take it day by day
sometimes even that's too much
at times i have some hope
at others i have none at all
but i do try

waiting
waiting for that new beginning
when everything comes together
and i feel alive again
and my worries have drifted away
i feel free and i'm truly my best self

is there a place for me
a place where i am free
a home that i belong in
somebody to love me

don't you get sick of it all
all the disapproving gazes
all the awkward conversations
all the sad news on t.v
all the tears shed over ex lovers
all the pain in your stupid mind
i am so sick of it all