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K R W Feb 2016
There are nights when I get lonely and I want you to hold me
But there are nights when I have clarity and I wish you never laid eyes on me

K R W Jun 2015
The brave may not live forever
But the cautious?
They do not live at all.
                                                       (K R W)
K R W Jun 2015
I'm lonely and
You're lovely
And I just
Want to be with you right now
Even if you don't want to
Be with me.
                                                       (K R W)
K R W Jul 2015
It's sad that
Only my dreams
Allow me to escape
This reality
K R W Jun 2015
You know the end is near
When you become accustomed to the fear
                                                       (K R W)
K R W Aug 2015
If only a broken heart
Could cure a thousand dreams
K R W Jan 2016
Millions of tears
Wont ever fit
Into a worthy poem

K R W Jun 2015
If only I could smoke away the pain,
Like I do these cigarettes
                                                       (K R W)
K R W Jun 2015
I spend a lot of time in bed,
But not enough time sleeping.

Most of the time I'm smiling,
But internally I'm weeping.

I find I'm constantly day dreaming,
But never actually believing.

I try to hold it together
But as you may see; I'm screaming.
                                                       (K R W)
K R W Jul 2015
Why did you have to lock me out
When I let you in?
K R W Jun 2015
I'm always alone.
Whether I'm in a crowded room,
Surrounded by bodies of friends or family;
I am always alone.

I'm always lonely.
It doesn't matter if I've got people to talk to,
A shoulder to cry on;
I'm always lonely.

The worst thing about
Being mentally unstable
Isn't knowing you are
But having to live a life like no one else knows.
                                                       (K R W)
This isn't my best piece of writing, but this isn't my best day either.
K R W Jul 2015
I guess my heart
Is bigger than my mouth
Because I can never seem
To express this drouth...
                                                       (K R W)
K R W Jul 2015
Say you'll remember me
Even on your darkest days
When you feel I'm drifting away

Say you'll always love me
Whilst I've ran to some place new
Your thoughts of me never blue

Promise me you'll wait
Until I've found myself;
Til I can be 'oneself'

Promise me you will not cry
Even though I'm in pain
Don't bring yourself to shame

I promised you I'd never leave
But now I'm gone
But it's because of you that my spirit shon

I will always love you
Just try to remember
I'll be back with you, every December
                                                       (K R W)
K R W Jul 2015
I wonder
How many lives I have to live
Until I find a life
I'd like to live
(K R W)
K R W Aug 2015
Is it too much to ask
For someone to say
'How are you?
And how is your day?'

Because if I'm honest
That's all I need
For someone to show
That they really care about me.

Because I sit at home
Alone all day,
With these voices in my head
Wasting me away.

They're telling me to cut
'Pop some pills, you won't be sad'
And I just need the confrontation
That it's making me mad.

All I need is a shoulder to cry on
Someone to wipe away these tears,
A companion in this mess
Because I've been like this for years.

Always alone
And never with a smile.
An extroverte living like an introverte,
Lonely all the while.
                                                       (K R W)
K R W Jun 2015
In movies you see there is a person, Emerged in water,
Surrounded by darkness and Captivated by the silence.
You see they're drowning,
You can hear them
Taking their last and final breath
But are greeted by water instead of oxygen.
You know they're dying
And so do they.
But in a miraculous change of events
A hand comes down to save them
Or they're awoken from their nightmare.
This is my situation.
I'm emerged in life,
Surrounded by hate
And captivated by the sadness.
I can see I'm not getting better.
I can feel myself
Desperately looking for my happiness.  Instead I'm greeted by loneliness.
I know I'm dying,
So does everyone else.
But this is reality; not a movie.
There are no miracles.
No ones going to reach out their hand and save me,
I'm a life not worth saving.
How can I wake up from a nightmare When my life is one?
                                                      ( K R W)
K R W Jun 2015
I work to dull the pain
But dulling the pain doesn't work.
                                                       (K R W)
K R W Jun 2015
Either way you win
But there is always something you lose.

                                                       (K R W)
K R W Jul 2015
I don't know how yet
Or in what context
But all I know is that one day,
One day
I want to tell my story.
Of love, heartbreak.
Life, death and wanting both.
Trying to run away but instead getting lost in the haze that is my mind.
Finding comfort in a packet of cigarettes because they're really the only constant thing in my life right now.
Of failure, regrets.
Moving in body but static in mind.
But more importantly I want to be able to tell people of how I recovered from this never ending battle of self hate and loss of time.
I want to be able to finally say 'I wanted to end it all, because that - at the time - seemed to be like the easiest, most painless way out. But I didn't, and now I'm here, I finally made it.'
                                                       (K R W)
K R W Jun 2015
When thinking
Of a word that best describes me
The word that comes into focus
Most of the time is

Im lost in a sea of darkness
I've friends all around me
But none who know how I feel
Or I feel I can talk to.

I'm lost because I don't feel welcome
Like I don't belong.
When all I do is try
Try try try

Yet I'm still here
Drifting towards the inevitably of death
Waiting to feel just a little less lost.
                                                       (K R W)
K R W Jun 2015
Why does a letter on a piece of paper
Have to determine what I do later
In this godforsaken ****** life?
                                                   ­    (K R W)
K R W Jan 2016
"No matter what tongue we speak or land we come from, our hearts beat as one."
K R W Jul 2015
Nothing haunts us
Like the words we didn't say.
                                                       (K R W)
K R W Feb 2016
***** burns my throat but your name hurts my head
So I would rather black out with a hangover than stare blankly at my hands
Trying to forget what it was like to touch you
K R W Jan 2016
I don't understand how one can hurt so badly
But continue to hurt themselves more

K R W Jun 2015
It doesn't matter if I'm sober or drunk,
You're the centre of my thoughts.
                                                      ( K R W)
K R W Apr 2016
That's why I haven't told you I love you still.
I'm too scared of the outcome.
Have you moved on completely?
Are you entirely happy with her now?

These are questions I'll never get answer to because of the simple fact that I'm too frightened to tell you that after all these years,
I'm still hopelessly, irrevocably in love with you.

K R W Jan 2016
Every time I look in the mirror
All I see is a broken girl staring back.

Whenever I look into my eyes
Images of a stranded soul flood my brain.

A broken heart I've learnt to live with
But a damaged and darken soul will be the death of me

K R W Jan 2016
If only I grew some *****,
Life would be so much easier...

K R W Jan 2016
As if covering yourself in blankets
And wearing expensive mascara will protect your heart this time.

K R W Apr 2016
I suffer
That constant feeling of pain.
Which comes from watching the person you love,
Love someone else.

K R W Apr 2016
Just give me a few days and you'll be out of my system again

K R W Jun 2015
But little did he know that in the warmth of the setting sun he made me forget. He made me forget about him about why I was hurting and about even hurting myself. He didn't even make it happen, it just did. In that temporary moment of bliss, my body wasn't overridden with pain, but instead a contentment you'd feel when the water filled your lungs. I knew in that moment that I loved this boy who made me forget about everything that made me hurt and allowed me to start being me again. Perhaps a different me but maybe that isn't such a bad thing since I didn't like the me I was. He'd turned me into a girl that wanted to cut away the past instead of cutting broken skin. The boy who will save me from myself, is the boy that I deeply fell in love with.
                                                      ( K R W)
K R W Apr 2016
Loving someone,
Who you know will never love you the same

Is similar to a dream where,
You're running through an never ending hall;

It's hopeless, disappointing,
& once you've figured out the truth?

All it does is tear you apart;
Inside out.

K R W Jun 2015
It's been two years since it finished.
Two years since the end.
And I'm still here.
Becoming accustomed to the masks as if they were my friend.

It's hard to think,
That I was once in a place,
Where I radiated happiness;
It was always surrounding my face.

But now I'm sat
Writing poems about you
Because words are my only connection
(It's sad but it's true)

I've tried so hard
To move on, I swear.
But being this girl?
It's getting me nowhere.

So I smile a say
'I'm fine, I've moved on'
When truly, moving on
Is what I've needed for so long.

                                                       (K R W)
K R W Jan 2016
Relationships are overrated.

I've got a boy I used to love and know who broke my heart but won't leave my mind.

Bestfriends that I can hardly stand the sight of,

And a family that doesn't know what I'm going through.

It seems to me that the relationships I have are as stable as my mind, yet they're the only ones I have.

Horribly written, but it's hard to put big words next to little minded people.

Don't get me wrong, I love my family. But boy they have no clue.
K R W Jan 2016
If only our lives were like parking tickets...

"Here have mine. It's still got lots of time left on it but I don't want it anymore. You can have it now."

K R W Jun 2015
I'm mad at my past self,
For being such a ****-up.
But I'm sad for my future self
Because I'm too scared to do anything about it.
                                                       (K R W)
K R W Jul 2017
Fear seeps into her lung,
Halting her breath.
A memory washes over her,
Taking her back to a territory she dare not enter.
A time were life was simple,
Where the whole world was eating out of the palm of her hand.
For had her peak slipped past her?
Had the best years of her life already stormed into her life and left without a trace?
Without her even having the chance to appreciate them?
She hoped not.
For if they had,
What would the point be in waiting around for things to never get better?

(K R W)
K R W Jul 2015
Break my heart;
I'll break your soul.
                                                       (K R W)
K R W Aug 2015
I wonder,
If ever you lay in bed at night
And like me before the tears threaten to fall
You think of all the times we shared.
The good, the bad and everything inbetween.
To a time you'd say I'd make your heart melt just by unexpectedly waking through your door.
Or a moment when we'd argue over sheer nothings out of fright of losing one another.
Because I always do.
My mind is always drifting off to a place where you would whisper sweet words into my ears or where I'd be kissing the red hand mark on your face trying to take away the pain I've inflicted.
I hope you have that with her now.
Moments that aren't filled with big gestures but little ones that stay with you forever, because times like now?
I feel as though they're all that's holding me together.  
                                                     ­  (K R W)
K R W Jun 2015
Being grumpy
Comes with a price
                                                       (K R W)
K R W Apr 2016
The weight of your absence is so heavy
I can’t remember what it feels like to breathe without gasping.
This isn't my poem. The full version is lower down, with the same title. I have chosen to repost this snippet as it is one of my favourite lines. I highly recommend that you go give it a read.
K R W Jul 2015
It’s been months since we last kissed
and I’ve been trying to figure out why love sounds more like an apology
than a confession when it comes from my mouth.

I came to the conclusion it’s because I have been emotionally unavailable
since I learned that no matter how much you love someone
it will not make them miss you.

I find myself surrounded by those who have left more than those who have stayed
so often they start to blur together.

You once said that loving me is like
constantly struggling to come up for air without ever being underwater,
but you didn’t notice I was suffocating under the absence of everyone
who had promised to stay.

Someone once told me “leave before they love you,
or you’ll stay until they don’t anymore.”

You were writing my name in cement and I was carving yours
in trees marked to be cut down, saying
“this is what happens when someone ruins you before you have a chance to ruin them.”

I’ve fallen in love with you more times than I can count,
and I’m not sure if that means I’ve fallen out of love just as many.

I kept showing you the way out because I wanted to see if you would leave
or find a way to lock the door.

I was too busy tearing them off their hinges
to notice you were desperately trying to bolt them shut.

I guess it’s only fitting I’m left asking the windowpanes where you went.

I think of the things I want to say to you like “it’s for the best”
“maybe it was never that good anyways”
but when I get the chance to say anything I know
all that will come out is I miss you, let me stay.

I’m trying not to let this bitterness leave a bad taste in my mouth
but you never saw the point of someone else’s lips on yours
unless they made your teeth shake,
and all I can ******* think about is you leaning in first for anyone but me.

The weight of your absence is so heavy
I can’t remember what it feels like to breathe without gasping.

There are a hundred different ways to say I miss you
but I’m stumbling over every single one
and I’ve realized you can only write about someone so much
before the only thing you can write about is the last time you saw them.

They say you’re only as good as the company you keep,
so I guess that’s why I haven’t been doing so well since you left me.
I didn't write this poem (I wish I did) but I just wanted to share it with you all because it is my favourite.
K R W Jan 2016
I don't quite understand the concept of time.
It takes seconds to break and weeks to heal.
A minute to learn something about someone and a lifetime to forget.
It's a matter of months for a baby to grow a personality yet a dose of spiteful words, handed out in seconds, for that child to be destroyed.

I never understood the concept that it takes a lifetime for something so beautiful to grow, and seconds for it to be torn apart.

K R W Jun 2015
I love my family,
But I'd prefer my sanity.
                                                       (K R W)
K R W Apr 2016
"You don't need water to feel like you're drowning"
K R W Apr 2016
What's the point of loving if you don't do it with all you have?

K R W Feb 2016
I'm not alone
I'm just lonely

(K R W)
K R W Jun 2015
Even though they're faded
(Along with the thoughts)
My left arm,
The one that has seen too much rusted silver,
Countless tears of crimson streams,
Always seems to be
Just that little bit heavier.

But whether that's the weight on my mind
Or the extra weight of torn skin;
Having to drag it around -
Like everything was once OK -
Is a 'simple task'
That's pulling me down.
                                                      ( K R W)
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