Submit your work, meet writers and drop the ads. Become a member
 
Randy Johnson Sep 2022
If you're wondering how long it took for a man to die after crashing a car, five days was how long it took.
The car crash killed him and his ex-wife who was named Stacy Brooks.
He was driving over a hundred miles per hour at midnight, that was really fast.
Stacy died instantly but her ex-husband died about 120 hours after the crash.
Stacy has been dead for the same amount of time that she lived, twenty-five years.
She was a very special lady and her death brought about misery, suffering and tears.
Stacy wasn't stuck up like some other girls who I went to school with, she would talk to me.
It wasn't fair when she died so young, my friend has been dead for a quarter of a century.
Her life ended in 1997 on the seventh of September.
She was a unique person who I will always remember.
DEDICATED TO STACY ANN BROOKS (1972-1997) WHO DIED A QUARTER OF A CENTURY AGO TODAY ON SEPTEMBER 7, 1997.
868 · Mar 2017
Puppy Trump
Randy Johnson Mar 2017
I have a puppy who loves to run and jump.
I have a Chihuahua that is named Trump.
He was born on the 14th of January and he's special indeed.
I now have two Applehead Chihuahuas, that is their breed.
Trump is some feisty and he's as cute as he can be.
He is my new pet and he means a great deal to me.
It's nice to have two dogs that are purebred.
I love both of my Chihuahuas who are Appleheads.
864 · Jan 2016
The Darn Sun
Randy Johnson Jan 2016
When I was a child during the winter, I hated the sun because it melted the snow.
And when the snow was melted by the sun, school was where I had to go.
As a child, when it snowed, school was closed and it was sure to excite.
But when the snow was gone, it was back to school and that sure did bite.
When I got to stay home from school, I could play my Atari and it was fun.
But when the snow melted, I had to return to school because of the **** sun.
If other children are like I was, they become very happy every time it snows.
And when the snow melts, kids become like Homer Simpson, they yell "Doh!"
This is a true story.
863 · Jun 2015
Vengeance Of God
Randy Johnson Jun 2015
A man broke into my house and killed my entire family.
Because of his corrupt lawyer, he was found not guilty.
He killed another family and was found not guilty a second time.
His lawyer convinced the juries to find him innocent of the crimes.
I was going to have vengeance by killing him and I was really going to do it.
But God was just as angry as I was and he beat me to it.
The killer got third degree burns all over his body when he was engulfed by flames.
God made him pay because he was an abomination who brought nothing but shame.
I went through hell when he was found not guilty, it was too much to sustain.
He survived for four days after being burned and he was in excruciating pain.
I was working on night shift and that's why I wasn't able to protect my family.
God's vengeance was worse than my own, that's why the killer died in agony.
Even though this poem is fictional, God really does have vengeance from time to time.
Randy Johnson Dec 2015
If people ask me if my Christmas will be merry,
My answer to them will be "Not very."
The last Christmas when you were still alive was back in 2012.
My brother and I no longer have you and it's ******* ourselves.

I would give anything if I could spend another Christmas with you.
I know that you'd also love to spend another Christmas with me too.
My life would never be the same on the day when you were dead and buried.
I wish you a Merry Christmas, Mom but sadly, my Christmas won't be merry.
Dedicated to Agnes Johnson (1948-2013) who passed away on March 6, 2013. (This poem was written in 2014.)
856 · Feb 2016
Death Is Only Temporary
Randy Johnson Feb 2016
If you or a loved one is dying, it is very scary.
But I promise that death is only temporary.
In the future, we will be resurrected and we and our loved ones will be reunited.
You and they will be in perfect health, the thought of that is enough to get me excited.
When I'm reunited with my mom, it will thrill me.
If you worship Jehovah, you will live for eternity.
Randy Johnson Jun 2017
I dumped SuperGirl because her ***** are hard as rocks.
They are literally harder than concrete cinder blocks.
I should've known they were hard because bullets bounce off of them.
******* that aren't soft should be a crime because it is so grim.
When I broke it off, she made my life a living hell
She burned down my house and ****** in my well.
If you think that was bad, you won't believe the other things that she did.
She lied to Social Services, she said that I abused my son and I lost my kid.
She put an end to my *** life when she used her laser beams to castrate me.
My manhood has been taken and no jail will hold the ***** so she's going free.
My life has fallen to pieces, I would give anything for some Kryptonite.
I would also want Batman's armor suit so I could **** that ***** in a fight.
Don't even think about dating SuperGirl, believe me when I say that it is no fun.
If you date her and break it off, you'd better have a Kryptonite bullet in your gun.
Randy Johnson Feb 2016
The world is nearly as bad today as it was during the days of Noah.
People must turn away from their sinful ways and turn to Jehovah.
If people don't change, they won't live in paradise and that's not an exaggeration.
People must put an end to stealing, watching ****, doing drugs and fornication.
People must give up binge drinking and gambling because those are also sins.
If people don't change their ways, they won't live in paradise, they won't win.
People must stop killing, ****** and committing other crimes.
People must change or they will be harshly judged when Jesus returns at the end of time.
Jehovah God is my master and my friend and he loves and cares about us.
But he won't let people live in paradise if they're people who he can't trust.
840 · Dec 2015
Thank You, Jehovah
Randy Johnson Dec 2015
Thank you, Jehovah for giving me such a wonderful mother.
Out of all of the women you could've given me for a mom, I'm glad that you didn't choose any other.
You gave me such a terrific mother, she was so special and unique.
You gave me a mom who was beautiful, kind, thoughtful and meek.
Thank you, Jehovah, the kindness and love that you've given is something I probably can't repay.
But I do love you more than life itself and that is something that I'll always be proud to say.
Dedicated to Jehovah and Agnes Johnson.
840 · Jan 2023
Lisa Marie
Randy Johnson Jan 2023
You died in 2023 and your dad died in 1977.
After living for 54 years, you went to Heaven.
You have lost your life and that is very sad.
Now you have been reunited with your dad.
You did charity work just like your father did.
Your dad loved you and you were his only kid.
As your fans grieve, they're sad and depressed.
Your life ended after you went into cardiac arrest.
When CPR was performed, your heart was restarted.
But you still died and your fans are broken-hearted.
You died a few weeks before you would've turned 55.
Your fans are devastated because you didn't survive.
DEDICATED TO LISA MARIE PRESLEY (1968-2023) WHO DIED ON JANUARY 12, 2023.
Randy Johnson Jul 2018
I got tired of being called a hillbilly from the sticks.
So I built a time machine and traveled back to 1776.
I intended to see the signing of the Declaration of Independence.
This was a fantastic historical moment that needed my attendance.
But my time machine landed on Thomas Jefferson before the document was written.
The document wouldn't exist that gave America independence from Great Britain.
I accidentally squashed Thomas Jefferson so it was left up to me.
I wrote the Declaration of independence so the USA could be free.
You may have noticed a few changes that I made.
One of which is that it's mandatory for me to get laid.
I proved that I'm not a hick who is slow.
I wrote the Declaration of Independence nearly two and a half centuries ago.
836 · Sep 2021
Cowardly Terrorists
Randy Johnson Sep 2021
Cowardly terrorists caused many people a great deal of sorrow.
On September 11, 2001, 2,996 people would have no tomorrow.
Many people died because a few planes were hijacked.
Almost 3,000 people died and they won't be coming back.
At those innocent people's funerals, many people showed respect by sending flowers.
All because those terrorists caused those planes to crash into the World Trade Towers.
Twenty years ago today, many had good reason to be afraid.
Time sure does fly, it doesn't seem like it has been two decades.
Mom donated $100 to the families of the people who passed away.
She was truly sorry that those people perished on that terrible day.
That tragedy is something that people can't forget, it's something we will always remember.
Because of cowardly terrorists, many innocent people died on the eleventh of September.
DEDICATED TO THE PEOPLE WHO DIED ON SEPTEMBER 11, 2001
834 · Jul 2022
Earnest II
Randy Johnson Jul 2022
He died one year ago today and was laid to rest.
He was a good friend and his name was Earnest.
Earnest was one of three men that I knew who died last year.
He repaired and sold computers but cancer ended his career.
He would still be fixing and selling computers if he was alive.
Earnest tried to beat cancer but sadly, he could not survive.
His friends and family are sad because he no longer exists.
He was a great man and a friend who has been missed.
Everybody who knew him was truly blessed.
He was my friend and his name was Earnest.
DEDICATED TO EARNEST MARTIN OWENS (1960-2021) WHO DIED ONE YEAR AGO TODAY ON JULY 29, 2021.
828 · May 2018
Pharmacy Shootings
Randy Johnson May 2018
Five minutes after I left, four people were shot in a pharmacy.
If I had been there for an extra five minutes, one of the victims would've been me.
A maniac shot four people over a tray of pain pills.
Two of his victims lived but the other two were killed.
He probably thought he'd get off scott free but he did not.
He wasn't even able to get out of town before being caught.
That punk shot those people five years ago today.
Now he's rotting in prison, he's being made to pay.
The cops arrested him and put him behind bars and that's where he belongs.
He valued pills more than four innocent people, what he did was so wrong.
DEDICATED TO THE FOUR PEOPLE WHO WERE SHOT AT THE DOWN HOME PHARMACY IN BEAN STATION, TENNESSEE.
826 · Jul 2019
Smoke Free - Part II
Randy Johnson Jul 2019
I've been smoke free two months today.
I haven't smoked and I hope that's how things will stay.
Please don't start smoking, it wasn't a good thing for me to do.
Please say no to nicotine because that is what is best for you.
Randy Johnson Jan 2017
After we die, the world will forget about me and you.
But God will never forget about us and that is true.
God will remember us after we die even if the world lasts a million more years.
God will feel pity for our loved ones who mourn our deaths and shed their tears.
God knew about all of us even before we were in our mothers wombs.
And he will eventually raise the dead, we will walk out of our tombs.
God will remember everybody and he'll prove it when we're resurrected.
When this happens, life will be glorious because God will see to it that everything is perfected.
Randy Johnson Jan 2019
I learned the hard way that real bears aren't like Winnie the Pooh.
I decided to pet one and I soon learned it was a stupid thing to do.
When I tried to pet him, he bit off my hand.
I can no longer drive a taxi so I was canned.

I thought that all bears were like Winnie the Pooh, kind and gentle.
When my wife learned that I lost my hand and job, she went mental.
My wife used to be understanding and sweet, we used to laugh and cuddle.
As she walked out the door, I kicked her in the **** and she landed in a mud puddle.

She didn't want a man with no job and no hand so she decided to leave.
But getting a swift kick in the **** wasn't something she expected to receive.
If you've seen Child's Play, you'll understand that my wife has the temper of Chucky.
Losing my hand and job caused me to lose that witch so I guess that I'm pretty lucky.
820 · Jul 2019
Breadwinner
Randy Johnson Jul 2019
For many years, you were our family's breadwinner.
Your money paid for our breakfasts, lunches and dinners.
Because of my mental impairment, you continued to support me after I turned eighteen.
You could've outworked two twenty year olds, you were the hardest worker I've ever seen.
After twenty months of chemotherapy, you lost your fight.
Your battle with Leukemia ended six years ago tonight.
For the last two days of your life, you couldn't even reply to what people said.
When I received a call from my sister-in-law, she informed me that you were dead.
Your existence on Earth ended at around 10:20 PM.
One day I'll go to Heaven and I will see you again.
Dedicated to Charles F. Johnson (1947-2013) who died on July 13, 2013.
Randy Johnson Aug 2023
Christians aren't supposed to get revenge, they're supposed to forgive.
And Christians are supposed to do that for all of the days that they live.
If you do a Christian wrong, he or she isn't supposed to get back at you.
A true Christian will know that getting revenge is the wrong thing to do.
God doesn't want people to get revenge, he wants us to forgive others.
And God wants people to love one another.
818 · Dec 2020
Dawn Wells Death
Randy Johnson Dec 2020
Something bad has happened, we've lost Dawn Wells.
Her friends and family must be going through Hell.
When we lose such a talented person, it's hard to understand.
For a few years she starred on "Gilligan's Island" as Mary Ann.

She died because of Covid-19 complications.
Her demise is sure to cause devastation.
Her family will find it hard to let go but they will have to try.
Dawn Wells has perished and it's sad to have to say goodbye.
DEDICATED TO DAWN WELLS WHO DIED AT THE AGE OF 82 ON DECEMBER 30, 2020
Randy Johnson May 2016
You were an awesome actor but I regret to say that you died twenty years ago.
First, you were Doctor Who and later you were Worzel Gummidge the Scarecrow.
You died of a heart attack in your sleep.
When people found out, they began to weep.

You died two decades ago on this very day.
You were British but you died in the USA.
Your contribution made quite an impact.
Many people loved you and that is a fact.

When you died in 1996, you were cremated.
Because of your death, millions were devastated.
I watched every episode of Worzel Gummidge even though it was a children's show.
You brought magic to every role you played, especially as The Doctor and that loveable Scarecrow.
Dedicated to Jon Pertwee who died at the age of 76 on May 20, 1996.
816 · Aug 2015
Ten Reasons Why I Love God
Randy Johnson Aug 2015
I love Jehovah and I'll love him for all of my days.
How much do I love him, let me count the ways.
1. I love him because he cares.
2. I love him because he's fair.
3. I love him because he's noble and just.
4. I love him because he's one who we can trust.
5. I love him because he's always around.
6. I love him because he won't let me down.
7. I love him because he does not lie.
8. I love him because he eases our pain when we cry.
9. I love him because he loves me.
10. I love him because he'll let me live in paradise for eternity.
Those are the ten reasons why the Lord has my love and respect.
When we need somebody to comfort us, he's the one who we should select.
813 · Jun 2015
Number One
Randy Johnson Jun 2015
You were always number one, never number two.
I'm your son and I was very fortunate to have you.
You cared more about others than you did for yourself and that is rare.
It took your death to show me how hard life can be and how unfair.
Because you chose to be a homemaker, I was able to spend much more time with you and that made me glad.
Because of you, I admire women who are homemakers and I don't care if that makes Feminists mad.
When people see me, they see a man who is proud to be your son.
You always came first in my life, you were always number one.
Dedicated to Agnes Johnson (1948-2013) who passed away on March 6, 2013.
811 · Jun 2019
John Wayne Brown III
Randy Johnson Jun 2019
I've always said no to drugs but my friend didn't do the same.
When a person dies of an overdose, it's always a **** shame.
John learned the hard way that a man reaps what he sews.
Every time drugs were offered to him, I wish he had said no.
I'm not certain what he overdosed on, it may have been ****.
When my friend of forty years overdosed, he drew his last breath.
I recently read that **** damages the lungs, kidneys, liver, heart and brain.
John might have rejected **** if that was something he could've ascertained.
Years ago, I tried to convince him to get some help but my words always fell on deaf ears.
He was forty-eight but if he had said no to drugs, he could've lived for many more years.
DEDICATED TO JOHN W. BROWN (1970-2019) WHO DIED ON JUNE 3, 2019.
810 · Jun 2017
The Loss of Adam West
Randy Johnson Jun 2017
Batman has died and people are depressed.
The world has to say goodbye to Adam West.
He starred as the Caped Crusader for three years.
Before he went to Heaven, he had a great career.
He became the Dark Knight over fifty years ago.
He made a success of the Batman television show.
He was a reoccurring character on Family Guy.
His fans were both sorry and sad to see him die.
He was very talented but now he's being laid to rest.
Every Batman fan should be grateful to Adam West.
Dedicated to Adam West who died at the age of 88 on June 9, 2017.
807 · Mar 2021
Forced To Go AWOL
Randy Johnson Mar 2021
What happened is certainly enough to appall.
I'm in the Army and I was forced to go AWOL.
I am disgusted by what happened and it's hard to believe.
Even though my brother was dying, they wouldn't give me leave.
I wanted to see my brother one last time before he died.
I plead with my superiors to give me leave but I was denied.
When it came to my late brother, I thought the world of him.
I went AWOL to be by his side and to tell him that I love him.
Now I'm facing a Court Martial, I'm in trouble indeed.
They turned their backs on me in my hour of need.
Now they're treating me like I committed a horrible crime.
But at least I was able to tell my brother that I love him in time.
A Court Martial and time in prison are what I'll probably receive.
But my superiors were cruel and despicable for not giving me leave.
806 · Apr 2015
You Killed My Sister
Randy Johnson Apr 2015
One terrible night you decided to drink and drive.
You hit my sister head on and she didn't survive.
That liberal judge only gave you a slap on the wrist.
But now I'm going to **** you because I'm ******.
You are a monster, you didn't feel any remorse at all.
I just fired my shotgun and your brains are on the wall.
Now it's my turn not to be remorseful, in fact I feel pretty good.
I would gladly **** you again if I could.
Because of people like you, hundreds of thousands of people are dead.
And because of people like you, many more won't have a future ahead.
This poem is fictional but sadly, drunk driving fatalities are real.
803 · Feb 2017
There's No Place Like Home
Randy Johnson Feb 2017
When my family and I moved into this house in 1977, Dad was our patriarch.
For four decades I have lived in a subdivision that is called Crosby Park.
Today I've lived in this subdivision for forty years.
I was only five years old when I moved here.
When a person lives at a place for that many years, it fits like a glove.
This is where I'll live for the rest of my life and it's a place that I love.
I'll tell you why my place means more to me than it did just ten years ago.
It's because this place is now mine and there's no place like home.
803 · Nov 2015
My Letter To God
Randy Johnson Nov 2015
I'll do anything you want, I'll obey your every command.
I'll cross countries if you wish, I will go to any land.
I want to be your humble servant, that is true.
I love you deeply and I'll do anything for you.
You are the almighty Jehovah, you and your son are Kings.
When a person serves you, happiness is what it brings.
When it comes to serving somebody, you're the one who I've selected.
I will praise your name now and in the future when I'm resurrected.
791 · Sep 2018
Terrible Moonshine
Randy Johnson Sep 2018
People don't like me because I make terrible moonshine.
Nobody in their right mind wants this whiskey of mine.
I've received a lot of angry phone calls, and some pretty nasty letters.
People say that when it comes to my shine, horse **** tastes better.
A city slicker actually called my moonshine slop.
He felt he'd been ripped off so he called the cops.
The police arrested him too for buying the moonshine in the first place.
His stupidity got him jail time, you should've seen the look on his face.
My shine is so terrible that the Surgeon General has started putting a warning label on every bottle.
If you drink my 130 proof moonshine, you won't walk straight for days, when you walk, you will waddle.
My shine will knock your head off, it's sure not as mild as a malt.
I've warned you about my shine so if it makes you go blind, it will be your fault.
789 · Dec 2016
A 2nd Poem About Joe Webb
Randy Johnson Dec 2016
My neighbor is a responsible drinker, he won't drink and drive.
If other people were as smart as him, many people would still be alive.
Joe will not drive a vehicle if he has been drinking.
That is responsible behavior and it's also good thinking.
If you're about to drink and drive, remember Joe because he's an inspiration.
Driving while intoxicated is very dangerous and that is not an exaggeration.
Dedicated to Joe Webb.
785 · Jul 2021
The Late Christopher Mayer
Randy Johnson Jul 2021
He starred in an episode of "18 Wheels Of Justice".
He died ten years ago today and his name was Chris.
He starred in a movie that is titled "Stunts Unlimited".
His fans were sad when they learned that he was dead.

When we lost him at the age of fifty-seven, we lost him too soon.
He starred in "The Dukes Of Hazzard" and "The Dukes" cartoon.
He was temporarily hired when the producers had to replace Luke.
I think that he did an admirable job when he starred as Vance Duke.

He starred in "Official Denial", "Raven" and "East Meets West".
He also starred in two episodes of "Xena: Warrior Princess".
He starred in "Liar Liar" and it's sad to know that he's gone for good.
He and Coy fought the system like a two modern day Robin Hood.
Dedicated to Christopher Mayer (1954-2011) who died ten years ago today on July 23, 2011
Randy Johnson May 2016
We can have what Satan can't, we can live for eternity.
This is the reward  that is available for you and me.
Eternal life is something that we can enjoy.
But Satan will be defeated and then destroyed.

When Jesus returns, we will all be young again.
I can't say when this will happen, I don't know when.
Imagine still being a young man or woman after trillions of years have passed.
Unlike today, our youth will never end, it will be something that will last.

There will be no racism, no bullies, everybody will be your best friend.
Eternal life is a gift that's available to us but Satan's existence will end.
If we love and worship The Lord, we will live forever even though we're currently flawed.
Satan will be destroyed but we can have eternal youth because people are loved by God.
783 · Jan 2022
Counterfeit Money
Randy Johnson Jan 2022
I make money that is not real.
I love to make counterfeit bills.
I have a contact who steals the paper that the government makes.
My counterfeit money looks like the real thing, I make no mistakes.
I counterfeit fifty dollar bills.
I have talent and I have skill.
I make fifteen million bucks of counterfeit bills every year.
But something has gone wrong, the Secret Service is here.
They just busted down my door and I'm being placed under arrest.
It's a pity that they found me because when it comes to making counterfeit money, I'm the best.
I thought my operation was fool proof, I didn't know that I would fail.
I underestimated the Secret Service and now I am going to rot in jail.
783 · Dec 2016
Goodbye Debbie
Randy Johnson Dec 2016
Just one day after we lost Carrie Fisher, her mom died too.
I guess both the shock and pain was too much for her to go through.
Carrie died at the age of  sixty and her mom was eighty-four.
It's a shame that neither of them will be around anymore.
Many people were Debbie Reynolds fans and they thought a lot of her.
This has been a sad week because we lost both Carrie and her mother.
Dedicated to Debbie Reynolds (1932-2016) who died on December 28, 2016.
783 · Jul 2021
The Loss Of Landon
Randy Johnson Jul 2021
Thirty years ago, your life was taken away.
You have been deceased for 10,958 days.
You starred in "Bonanza", "Little House On The Prairie" and "Highway To Heaven" as well.
You were very talented and when it came to being a success, you were bound not to fail.
You also guest starred on other TV shows.
You were only 54, that was too young to go.
In 1957, you starred in the pilot episode of "The Restless Gun".
Twenty-seven years later in 1984, you starred in "Sam's Son".
You and Victor French both died of cancer and both of you died at the age of fifty-four.
You and French were buddies and it's sad that neither of you can star in anything anymore.
Dedicated to Michael Landon (1936-1991) who died 30 years ago today on July 1, 1991
782 · Feb 2023
The Late Jacqueline Hill
Randy Johnson Feb 2023
She starred in "Doctor Who" and "Blood Money".
She died thirty years ago today at the age of 63.
When she starred in those Doctor Who episodes, she starred with William Hartnell and Tom Baker.
She lost her battle with cancer thirty years ago today and she went to Heaven and met her maker.
She also starred in "Tales Of The Unexpected", "The Comedy Man" and "No Hiding Place".
People were sad thirty years ago because she was no longer a member of the human race.
It's always sad when such a talented person dies.
All of her fans mourned because of her demise.
DEDICATED TO JACQUELINE HILL (1929-1993) WHO DIED 30 YEARS AGO TODAY ON FEBRUARY 18, 1993
780 · Nov 2021
Sugar Daddy
Randy Johnson Nov 2021
It was hard for her husband and child to believe what she had done.
She ran off with a sugar daddy and abandoned her husband and son.
She did her husband wrong but I believe what she did to her son was worse.
She was a greedy woman who decided to put money first.
She was dumped by her sugar daddy and she asked her husband if he would take her back.
Her husband said No when she returned because intelligence is something he doesn't lack.
He told her that she left them once and he wouldn't give her a chance to do it again.
This woman loved money too much and ended up having to pay for her terrible sin.
She thought she could reconcile with her husband but she didn't succeed.
She abandoned her husband and son, stupidity is often caused by greed.
SADLY< THIS IS A TRUE STORY ABOUT A MAN WHO I MET.
778 · Jun 2019
John Wayne Brown II
Randy Johnson Jun 2019
Just one month ago, you were walking around.  
But now you're dead and buried in the ground.
So much can change in just the blink of an eye.
You went too soon, forty-eight was too young to die.
Forty years ago in 1979, we became friends.
I wish that your life hadn't come to an end.
On the 3rd day of June, you took your final breath.
You overdosed on drugs and it caused your death.
Because you were a drug user, you didn't survive.
Drugs eventually ****, that's why you're no longer alive.
DEDICATED TO JOHN W. BROWN (1970-2019) WHO DIED ON JUNE 3, 2019.
777 · Nov 2019
Mario is Pissing
Randy Johnson Nov 2019
Back in the nineties, a video game was made that was called 'Mario is Missing'.
But the game was changed, the original title was going to be 'Mario is *******'.
In the game, Luigi has to find his brother who is taking a ****.
But they learned that people would've been offended by this.
They changed it because it would've been offensive to watch Mario ***.
They changed it because that was something nobody would want to see.
In addition to seeing Mario ***, people would've seen his tiny *******.
And Luigi would've laughed because Mario's ***** is only half an inch long.
Luigi would've belittled Mario and he would've laughed until he lost bladder control.
People would've also seen Luigi **** because his brother's **** is smaller than a tootsie roll.
775 · Nov 2015
The Great Teacher
Randy Johnson Nov 2015
Jesus was known as the Great Teacher.
Performing miracles was his best feature.
He taught us how  to enter God's Kingdom and live in paradise.
If we love Jehovah God and live by his rules, that will suffice.

Jesus taught us not to be obsessed by wealth.
He taught us to love our neighbors like ourselves.
Jesus has always obeyed his father because he wants to please him.
Jesus and Jehovah can make us happy even when things are grim.

Jesus taught us the importance of honoring our fathers and mothers.
Jesus served people while he was on Earth and he taught us to also serve others.
Jesus was a remarkable teacher and he's also very wise.
We will live in paradise if we do what's right in God's eyes.
775 · Jul 2020
The Loss of Lena
Randy Johnson Jul 2020
It's with great sadness when I say that we won't see her anymore.
Lena died in March of 2020 and she was born in March of 1944.
She is survived by her husband who is my Uncle James.
Losing such a special person is sad and it's also a shame.

James Greene Junior and Sharon Redmond are her two children.
After living for seven and a half decades, she has gone to Heaven.
She died just twenty-four hours before her 76th birthday.
Her loved ones are heart broken because she passed away.
Dedicated to Lena L. Greene who died on March 2, 2020.
Randy Johnson Dec 2019
Certain people hate the Wii U, they call it a piece of crap.
But I like the game console and I think it got a *** rap.
It's no XBOX One or PS4 but it's not an abomination.
I believe it was good and that's not an exaggeration.
Yes, a few of its games do stink, especially Paper Mario: Color Splash.
When I played that game, I'd get so mad that I wanted to throw it in the trash.
Nintendo released the Switch after they axed the Wii U.
People hated the console and so it was discontinued.
I hated to see the Wii U fail, it has become another Dreamcast.
Certain people hated the Wii U and now it's a thing of the past.
772 · Mar 2017
Farewell Jane
Randy Johnson Mar 2017
Last month my neighbor lost his wife of thirty-three years.
Her friends and family are grieving and shedding tears.
She was sixty-three years old and Delilah Jane Webb was her name.
As her loved ones mourn, they realize that life will never be the same.
I feel sad and so do many others because she died.
I feel bad for my neighbor because he lost his bride.
When a person dies, it's always something that is hard to face.
It's giving her loved ones comfort because she's in a better place.
When she was diagnosed with cancer, it was certainly scary.
People had to say goodbye when she died on the 20th of February.
Dedicated to D. Jane Webb who died on February 20, 2017.
770 · Jul 2022
My Baby Doll - Part VI
Randy Johnson Jul 2022
When I adopted you in 2013, Chihuahua dogs quickly became my favorite breed.
You died seven hundred and thirty days ago and it hurt, it hurt very much indeed.
I named you after a very special woman who was my mother.
When it comes to having a dog that's as terrific as you, there can never be another.
I knew you would eventually die but I didn't know that your death would be so near.
Your death occurred twenty-four months ago today, you've been dead for two years.
You were my dog and the love I felt for you can't be measured.
Pets don't live forever, while they live, they should be treasured.
Every pet owner will eventually have to face the pain that I experienced on that dreadful night.
You were like a daughter to me and the thought of losing a pet sure does cause a lot of fright.
I see dogs being sold for over three grand at a pet store in the mall.
But they aren't as special as you were because you were my baby doll.
DEDICATED TP AGNES (2011-2020) WHO PASSED AWAY TWO YEARS AGO TODAY ON JULY 11, 2020.
769 · Jun 2015
Daddy's Little Girl
Randy Johnson Jun 2015
You're looking at a man who has been blessed.
I have a dog and she's Daddy's little Princess.
My Chihuahua, Agnes is very special to me and I love her a lot.
She means more to me than anything else that I've got.
Agnes also loves me and she loves it when I stroke her dark brown fur.
I became a lucky man on the day when I adopted her.
Having Agnes for a pet is better than being wealthy, that's what I believe.
That's how I feel even though it's something that others may not perceive.
766 · May 2015
40 Days and 40 Nights
Randy Johnson May 2015
Noah and his family were the only people on Earth who were doing right.
So God caused a flood that killed everybody in 40 days and 40 nights.
All of the people on Earth were evil, it was a time that was dark.
Noah and his family were spared when God told them to build an ark.

God told Noah to take two of every animal so that all species would survive.
When the flood was over, Noah and his family were the only people who were alive.
It probably wasn't an easy decision when God decided to **** all of those women and men.
He gave us the rainbow which is a promise that he'll never do it again.
763 · Jul 2015
This Airplane Is Going Down
Randy Johnson Jul 2015
This airplane is on fire and it's going down.
Soon everybody on board will no longer be around.
I'm really scared because of the trouble that I'm in.
I'm praying and I'm begging God to forgive my sins.
Very soon I'll no longer be a part of the Human Race.
Very soon I'll be dead and I'll meet God face to face.
I'm really scared and my brow is covered with sweat.
I've done people wrong and that's something I regret.
Everybody else on this plane will die too, I'm not alone.
When we all die, Heaven will become our new home.
This is a fictional poem.
757 · May 2016
Jonah and The Ninevites
Randy Johnson May 2016
After Jonah got out of the whale, he went to the city of Nineveh and warned the Ninevites.
He told them that God was going to destroy them because they weren't doing what was right.
God was going to destroy them in forty days because of the evil they had done in the present and the past.
The King heeded the warning and he and everybody else covered themselves with sackcloth and began to fast.
The Ninevites turned from their evil ways after they were warned.
God saw that they had changed and he was no longer scorned.
God spared the Ninevites because they were no longer unfit.
Jehovah isn't a harsh God and that sure did prove it.
Randy Johnson Aug 2015
If you hadn't died, today you would've become sixty-seven.
But God called you home and you're with him in Heaven.
Because of your bad infection, you had an aneurysm and couldn't be healed.
As I watched you suffer, it made me cry because it was a terrible ordeal.
I begged God to save you but sadly, his answer was no.
It was your time to leave and that was why you had to go.
When I found you dead in the hospital bed, I began to mourn.
One of the greatest days in the world's history was the day when you were born.
Because of your death, hell has been what I've been through.
Happy Birthday Mom, I always have and always will love you.
Dedicated to Agnes Johnson (1948-2013) who passed away on March 6, 2013.
Next page