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Carolina Dec 2019
Baby blue, stay between the lines.
Honey dew, smoke it up at night.
Cheering them up, the arrogant boy.
Jazz's getting lost in that hazy joy.
You give them what they want
and they give you what you need.
It's not about the cash,
but about notoriety.
Still thinking of you,
from time to time;
your violent sight,
your Dadá wine.
Carolina Feb 2018
Summertime, loneliness and fear.
Oh, how I wish to have you near.
I'm voiceless calling you nonstop
and life makes me hate its plot.
See, I try my hardest to summon
a glimpse of your love to keep for me alone,
but the only thing I get from this mister
is his lustfull voice falling to a whisper.
I do not want him to be gone
but he will not stay for long
even if I put that ruby lipstick on
or when I let my silk dress slip off.
Flashing led light, cyan.
"Do not rush in" say the wise men.
But you now have that golden suntan
and I want it to happen as fast as it can.
The story is clear and I can see
this will soon only exist in me.
For I could hold your hand but not your arm
and I am sure you never meant no harm.
Distracted mind that you carry,
we could have had something legendary.
Just keep in mind when it ends and you are gone
your memory in my heart will live on.
Carolina Dec 2018
You wait for me
sitting on the couch
with a beer and a green.
I sit there by your side
in a beautiful night
silent and still.
Carolina Oct 2020
The key to heaven,
the sun that keeps us alive,
the one in a million,
everyday's sunrise.
I will stay here forever,
forever by your side,
with our promises and dreams,
with your hand on mine.
Your tender voice in my head
for all my life on replay
𝑌𝑜𝑢'𝑟𝑒 𝑔𝑜𝑛𝑛𝑎 𝑏𝑒 𝑜𝑘𝑎𝑦.
For Evie, the sun in my life.
Carolina Oct 2018
I like to write
things that no one reads.
I like to drink
until I can no longer think.
I like to sing
songs that no one knows.
I like to fantasize
that one day I'll feel whole.

I'm used to give some anything
with no hesitation.
I'm used to make others beg
for a little of my attention.
I talk about
everything that's in my mind.
I stay silent
for long periods of time.

I'm the best you can have.
I'm the worst you could meet.
I'll show you my angel
or I'll show you the beast.

I try to reinforce
my ideologies.
I try not to lose
my identity.
I try to live
enjoying every breath,
I try to speed up
my own death.

I'm a contradiction
of pushing and pulling.
I'm rising,
I'm falling.

I'm living.
Carolina Jul 2020
I know you hurt,
I know you try.
We get so tired
we want to die.
My angry eyes,
your tender voice,
always asking why,
but I don't rejoice.
Carolina Dec 2017
The echoes from the demons seem to never end.
And from all the existing things I wish you could always be my friend.
The present disassociates, I live in the past and hope in the future, an utopian dream.
The people that surround me swear they never meant to be so mean.
My inside child's demise was so tragic and raw.
All of that changed me into a fragile mind that lives bar through bar.
And as I write this your text lights up my phone screen, if I ever thought that I loved you, now, I'm begging you to just leave.
This family is a cold play, this friends are plastic dolls, my mind code is flawed, my lover never had the *****.
I wander through the hall of this lonely house, wishing I could blood paint the walls, wishing to find a cause.
And if I don't make sense don't you think it's all made up, it's just my non functioning head speaking after too many cups.
Carolina Jan 2019
And one day
someone came
knocking at your door
with flowers and a bottle of wine.
You looked through the window
and waved hi.
But it wasn't a hello,
it was a goodbye.
Carolina Dec 2018
The rose garden has wilted,
the petals are fully dried.
The morning emptiness
making a hole inside.
A knot in the pit of the stomach
tied way too tight,
and the mind lost
somewhere far behind.
Carolina Jan 2018
You try to stay calm,
you try to compose.
Baby blue tears down your cheeks.
Your mistake was to get close.
Carolina Jan 2018
Be careful
  
         for what once makes you feel complete then leaves you feeling empty,
        
              for what burns like branding iron then cools down to be the coldest thing,
            
                   for what once was special then turns out ordinary,

                         for the soft breeze which becomes into a hurricane

                                  and for life which suddenly brings you to death.
Carolina Jan 2018
I saw him and my heart did the thing.
I'm not quite sure if it was a click
or an instinct of survival.
Love or death.
Stay or run.
It's never in between,
just white and black.

Love me or hate me.
Stay or leave.
Rest in peace or rest in agony.
True love, true disaster.
Best friend, enemy.
My daddy, my mommy.
To take it all or to only give.
Protector, predator.
Promise, betray.
Creation, destruction.
We don't know no grey.
Carolina Mar 2018
The blowing wind caresses my hair.
Its touch is like yours; almost as it wasn't there.
One thing I said I'd never do,
but here I am, since months crawling to you.
I play the pawn under a disguise with no gleam,
forgetting to love myself, forgetting I am the queen.
Love makes you blind, deaf and stupid.
And for this one I cannot blame cupid.
It's now my own choice to cry on the floor,
knowing I could be strong and just ignore.
But I wipe my tears away and decide to try once again,
aware that it'll break my heart but I don't want this to end.
Carolina Jul 2017
My dreams turned to black,
I cannot get them back.
My life is an error
but now I'll spread terror.
They all made me cry,
killed all light inside.
They laughed at my hopes,
but I'll be the one tying their ropes.
I'm broken apart,
now I'll smash their hearts.
No mercy nor remorse,
you better be calling your hearse.
The pain becomes rage,
I won't be sorry for the rampage.
Because the tears that I've cried
no one heard through the night,
the tears that I've bled
show the words that they said.
My empty brown eyes
for sure you'll despise.
And your warmth they will steal,
you'll tell me how painful it feels.
I'll crush your head open,
I fantasize about it popping.
I'll torn apart your chest,
with a demonic wrath you'll be blessed.
One day they'll beg on their knees
but I'll have become a deadly disease.
If you're wondering when will it end,
it's simple, with the caress from a friend.
A friend who's hurting like me,
someone who comes as a soft breeze.
A caressing hand to free me from disease,
a gentle touch to make my cold dead heart unfreeze.
Sometimes the things we need are the things we'll never have.
Carolina Dec 2014
She's so beautiful,

she's got a lovely sad smile,

she's so nice,

but she's dead inside.
Carolina Feb 2020
Cuántas noches habré llorado
sintiendo un profundo desamor.
Tantas veces me he intoxicado
con un cigarrillo sanador.
Esperé un abrazo que nunca llegó,
di más de lo que tenía pero nadie lo vió.
Consciente de mí angustia, incapaz de lidiar con ella.
A veces, simplemente, la vida me atropella.
Y pertenezco a un oscuro y extraño lugar
del cual espero algún día poder escapar.
Si un día te vas, de antemano lo habré adivinado
aunque no admita jamás cuánto te he amado.
Una ruta solitaria por la que nadie maneja,
largo camino arruinado y no puedes presentar quejas.
Y se hace de noche pero no brillan estrellas.
Camino sola y se borran mis huellas.
Carolina May 2018
When your heart aches
and your soul cries.
When you feel lonely
and you struggle to get through the night.
When your chest hurts
and you're sad to the core.
When you give your best
but they ask for more.
When you feel empty,
you're full of void.
When life means nothing
but the devil's joy.
When your hands shake
while you're playing your part.
When you feel so afraid
you may never be loved back.
When you see nothing
but your future grave
and those judging eyes
turn the other way.
When everything you do is never enough
and the little good things
not a second last.
When all of that happens choose to create art.
Carolina Dec 2023
Bittersweet celebration.
Drunk and destroying decorations.
Ten minute sad song
playing on repeat,
crying all day long
dancing to the beat.
Carolina Mar 2020
You said you'd go back,
so in bed still I stood.
My back hurts
and my breath has stopped.
How many years have passed?
Carolina Apr 2020
Corazón frío,
corazón de hielo.
Saberlo todo,
no trae consuelo.

La ignorancia es una dicha.
Afirmo la frase.
¿Qué más da si no lo encuentro?
No hay planes en los que no fracase.

Corazón frío,
corazón de hielo.
Buscaba el cielo
y me estrellé contra en suelo.
Carolina Feb 2020
Another one
who grovels to them
when all you should do
is bid them farewell.
Carolina Feb 2019
Predicando tu palabra
testaruda y audaz
prometes un cielo
en el que no hay paz.
Carolina Aug 2016
Fantasy* and reality mixed in one.
You can't seem to find a way out.
Birds sing, deep blue up high in the sky.
Something's missing there but you try not to cry.

Denying the chance the world's not what you see,
you want to hide but also to break free.
Can't you see the one thing that's wrong?
It'll show you this is not where you belong.

The past holds your present,
it's in your mind but physically it's absent.
There are certain things that do not live
but you won't leave them, you want them to be here.

Just add a handful of salt to the cut
I promise you'll feel real, when actually you're not.
And you begin to distrust you own mind.
Filthy tricks it gives you make you soon blind.

So obsessed over things that don't exist anymore,
your warm tears crashing in the cold floor.
This is not your world, can't you see?
The extra piece in the puzzle is you staying here.

Memories of something you have never known,
but if you want to meet them your pulse must turn dead undertone.
Dreaming about something you'll never see.
May your lonely soul rest in agony.
Carolina Aug 2018
A face no one remembers
touched by the winter breeze,
dejected, walking with no rush
through streets that scream
You don't belong in here!
Looking for a hole in the ground
to lie down and sleep,
even when it's too cold
to decompose and disappear.
Red nose, watery eyes,
quietly humming a song
that no one seems to hear.
Stepping up the pace,
wishing to be headed somewhere else
than the pale yellow cracked paint house.
Cars passing by,
not a single friendly face
behind the steering wheel.
The cold pierces to the bone,
keep on walking, almost "home",
ease the coldness with a hot coffee.
And you travel through that state of mind,
never cured, never improved,
but you hope for it to change over a night of sleep.
Carolina Feb 2020
Literary dream
where my skin turns violet
and my lips go green,
where my eyes are holes
and I lose my teeth,
my hair's dry and won't ever grow,
my once strong flesh is now gone.
Carolina Mar 2020
Suddenly, the night was too dark,
the mind too twisted,
the city too dangerous,
the heart too damaged,
the sight too blurry
and life devastating.
Carolina Jun 2019
Si usted no me recuerda
está bien,
me perdí en algún lugar
y tal vez ya no voy a volver.
Si usted no me recuerda
está bien,
mi esencia es de fantasma
y no me puede ver.
Carolina Feb 2015
People try to find out what's wrong with you
but they can't see through your eyes.
Your demons know how to go unnoticed,
they know so well how to hide.
Carolina Nov 2015
I want to call you mine,
at least just for one night.
Carolina Mar 2020
I explode, I leave my reason aside.
I cannot do anything about the chemical mess in my mind.
And I think for minutes,
or maybe for hours,
feeling the pain
as it devours.
Carolina May 2019
Los pensamientos recurrentes,
la desazón insistente,
la llovizna eterna,
la oscuridad interna,
el sol eclipsado,
el desierto inundado,
el triste olvido,
el mortal hastío,
el café frío,
los bolsillos vacíos,
la mirada perdida,
el paso de la vida.
Carolina Jun 2018
I loved you.
You,
with your distance,
your lack of affection,
the fugacity of your loving,
the minimum attention.
You,
with the meaningless kisses,
the passionless love making,
the forced caresses,
always causing me deep aching.
I loved you like that,
just the way you are.
Bittersweet and all,
I wanted you.
But not anymore.
Carolina Apr 2018
You try to see
what's inside of me.
What do you seek?
Nothing is as cute as you think.
So do not sneak a peak.
Carolina Jan 2015
I have strange dreams about a mysterious and dark knight that comes to rescue me.
Sometimes he is speechless,
sometimes he is funny,
sometimes he's lovely,
sometimes he's mean...
but he's always powerfully dangerous, not another thing.
He rises from the darkness and guides me through a foggy forest.
I feel I'm in love but I've never seen him before.
I think about past lifes and a forbidden romance
that always ends up in a tragic separation.
Sometimes the dreams turn into nightmares
and during the day it's the only thing I can think of.
It consumes me.
Creepy creatures always hunt him and she stays all alone
till she sleeps again.

Running through the forest,
she hides in the shadow of the trees. They laugh.
When he catches her she giggles,
they gaze into each other eyes.
Suddenly a black shade covers it all.
Deadly pain inside her heart.
She can't see him, he's gone.
She wakes up and realizes
dreams forever will be lasting
.
Carolina Dec 2014
I fell in love with your shiny green eyes,
I remember how bright was your smile.
You used to hold my hand softly,
as if I was a porcelain doll about to break.

Just one year has passed
and your eyes look dead.
I've never seen such a fake smile,
I need to take a breath.

It hurts like hell seeing your scars,
and how your lips have turned blue.
I wish I could just go back in time,
but there's nothing I can do.

Your skin is so pale,
just like the sheets of this hospital bed.
I'm still shocked by the news,
I'm afraid of what I can lose.

Your arms are covered by bandage
and I wish it was me,
but I'm just here crying
because they told me you're dying.
Carolina Mar 2023
Amé tu energía,
tu sonrisa,
tu mirar.
Y hoy ya no te encuentro;
aunque lo intente
ya no estás.
Y no quiero alejarme
pero me cuesta caminar
y vos casi corriendo
ya ni me esperas.
Triste pero cierto,
a veces el amor no alcanza.
Carolina Aug 2020
Si algún día me escapo
espero perderme en el viento.
Y con el pasar de años macabros
convertirme en un cuento;
secreto para los infantes,
de terror para adultos.
De esos que todos saben, de murmullo en murmullo.
Y si algún día aparezco
en la puerta de tu casa,
espero te quedes blanco
inmovilizado de miedo.
Porque traigo conmigo la ira,
a través de ojos ya muertos,
emanando un poder desconocido
que te quita el aliento,
porque vas a ser consciente
de que el cuento era cierto.
Carolina Jul 2018
La de amores intermitentes y fugaces.
A quien le dan un intento pero no dos chances.

La de encuentros efímeros a escondidas.
Escapes irreales, soñadas huidas.

Su tímida personalidad versátil
en ocasiones se torna agobiantemente volátil.

Tiene esa extraña energía que la hace genuina,
de cada rosa muerta conserva una letal espina.

La que camina a través de la multitud
con la cabeza en alto y una desafiante actitud,

con su corto vestido ajustado
y labios de rojo tirando a morado.

Muchos la devoran con una mirada ardiente.
Secretamente eso es lo que espera impaciente.

Guiña un ojo e irrumpe sin previo aviso.
Te invita al lado equivocado del paraíso.

Especialmente a vos, nudillos de luchador.
Vos, que llevas ese mote de ganador.

Sus coloridos caprichos a los demás alteran,
pero ella actúa como si no lo supiera.

Y en sus solitarias caminatas a veces hace una parada
en aquel café donde la triste rutina se ve pausada.

Pide un jugo de naranja y se sienta en una mesa de afuera,
el vestido se le sube demasiado pero sabe lo que genera.

Piernas cruzadas provocativamente,
su lengua juega con el sorbete de forma inocente.

Su piel de seda emana cierta energía
que te golpea con imágenes de todo lo que le harías.

La de pícaras sonrisas, labios sabor miel,
sabe que de sólo pensarlo te quema la piel.
Carolina Jan 2016
“Era tan diferente,
como si viniera de una dimensión externa,
de un mundo sin descubrir ”
Carolina Mar 2018
You leave pieces of you
in every person you love.
You tear your heart apart
in order to give others warmth.
They take it all away
just to never give anything in return.

Now I understand
why I am so empty.
Now I am aware
why there's a trace of blood after every step that I take.

And I will wander
for as long as I am alive.
And I will wonder
how can I survive.
Carolina Jul 2018
The rain has stopped
but the sun is out sight.
The sky is cloudy grey
and I've grown numb.
I think I miss the pouring
hitting on my skin,
at least I had something
to make me feel.
Carolina Nov 2018
Con la sangre en la copa
y el rojo en la boca
realiza un ritual
de origen medieval.
Tal vez se ha vuelto loca.
Carolina Jun 2021
Que pena y que dicha
ser la que siente más,
la que ama más,
la que lo da todo.
Porque eso significa
sufrimiento garantizado.
Mientras él duerme tranquilo
en su indiferencia,
en su falta de vida.
¡Pero que alegría me da!
Alegría entre el dolor.
Saber que amo sin límites,
que soy pura pasión,
que ardo.
Prefiero sentir a flor de piel
porque, sé que, cuando sane
voy a seguir en llamas
y vos siempre vas a morir de frío.
Nunca vas a llenar tu vacío
porque para eso estaba yo.
Carolina Sep 2020
I've seen your eyes
and I've heard your voice...
They don't say the same.
Carolina Jun 2019
Love hurts
whether it's good or bad
Love hurts
and the one bruised is the heart
Carolina Feb 2018
No llego a entender porqué hay tanta tristeza dentro de mi.
Y ese ahelo por cosas que no existen aquí;
La añoranza por algo de lo cual no soy consciente
hace que la frustración sólo sea creciente.
Me pregunto si podré algún día escribir sobre algo agradable
en lugar de esta fatigosa angustia inmutable.
Pero como quienes pasan sus días esperando el final
gasto mi tiempo en automático intentando salir del espiral.
Algunas personas no nacieron para cumplir sus sueños
sin importar que tan grande y duro haya sido su empeño.
Y algunos seres sólo nacieron para morir,
no quiero creerlo pero estoy convencida de que mi única meta es partir.
Carolina Mar 2020
Lay me down,
leave me until I rot.
Go check the stained bed
and remove the corpse.

In a hole of fire throw it in,
let flames purify what once was me.
Carolina Mar 2018
Dripping down the insides of her thighs;
*******, on her are all the eyes.
The need to be tamed
she cannot control,
it's sick but the pleasure
screams: "just once more".
She craves it with every cell
but from her looks you could never tell.
Rough hands grabbing her tight,
controlling her as if she was a puppet,
mouth wide open gasping for air,
he keeps on slapping her until she says she loves it.
Black leather and cold chains,
purple and blue lights blow her brain.
It's all about being raw.
She's forced up off her knees
pulled hard by the hair,
as she keeps on saying please.
Ropes tied too tight leave their marks,
hot wet tongue licks all the bruised parts.
So many things to use,
but she's still the favorite toy.
Pointing fingers, narrow minds
but she's only there to enjoy.
No love, no sadness.
Just moans and madness.
You may think she needs affection,
the aftercare is cute,
but she has another type of hunger;
from this world to become a recruit.
Whatever it takes to feel good,
she's willing to do anything she's asked to.
Carolina Apr 2020
Her desire was love
but she found a land of ice.
In her duty to melt it
she ended up frozen alive.
Carolina Apr 2018
You haunt me
in my sleep
while I dream of
gasoline.
You come back
once again
acting like
you're a friend.
I wanted to
burn it all down
but you took the gasoline
and poured it all
on me.
I didn't say a word,
I just let you do
as I begin to burn.
You stared for a second
and then walked away.
I guess I dug
my own grave.
I should not cry,
I should not complain
for I knew since the begging
this would be all in vain.
Now I'm awake
and I see reality,
it wasn't you and I,
it was only me.
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