Your warm embrace is one I miss
This snowy December day
And though my brain is on the fritz
And yours a sim'lar way
Your warm embrace is all I miss
This cold, December day.

I close my eyes and harken back
To when I held you last.
My brain is warm, no longer black
Lit by thoughts of our past.
No matter what we seem to lack
Our love is meant to last.

What is it, how can we tell?
Are we forced into it, a cell?
A trapped enclosure, a set of ways
Dedicated to telling one how to be.

Not inherently bad,
But dangerous,
When we talk about
Dreaded gender.

Keep your codes for morals
Let me wear my skirt.
My dressed all lay dusty
Because I was afraid I would be
Looked at
As lesser.

No longer,
For I am truly,
Not akin to a single
Form of gender.

The one true way
That of self-realization
Comes from the acknowledgement
That I am me
Male, female, none, both.
I am Bede.

What lies above the tops of trees?
The field in which the bluejay flies.
Far-soaring through invisible seas
With white-foam clouds; We call the skies.

Can birds deduce the here and there?
From breezy-field to where it lies?
For when it flies up in the air,
Oh, does it know it's in the skies?

Birds care not for the 'next day'
They bend not to anxiety's sway
Be like a bird and you too may
Be happy wherever you lay.

Rosey-colored petals, dear
Is that not what you're finding here?
Amidst a shore of colors dear
Though not the colors of your home.

Red and black, oh rage abound!
Dark cries and wails, a sea of sound
Waves they crash, sea foam surrounds
Oh you are still so far from home.

The salty air echoes despair
For there's no hope to find down there
Your doom does Eldritch voice declare,
"You're trapped and never going home."

You let me live for you
And this is what I'll do

I am going out today
To see where I can go
Maybe I won't return again,
Lord i dont even know.

Would it be a blessing or a curse
To just put down my pen?
Why do i write, I feel contrite
To never write again.

I walk into the mossy wood,
The Sun above me shining.
Around me I can feel it warmth
And I see the ray's wide-winding.

As source, it gives me light and heat
And gives the moss it's green
Through grace, I shall be warm again
Even when I'm left dying.

When I walked to the restroom
The way he smiled at me
Tore my soul to shreds

I will not be afraid
To speak my mind
And to shout my heart's love

Arthur's kingdom, bright, so clearly shines
Among the grassy knolls of Briton
The Round-Table knights patrol the land
That Ol' Winter has clearly bitten.

With poor peasants freezing in their shacks
Their love for Arthur keeps them smitten
They don't remember the last they saw
Of the Almighty King of Briton.

The Round-Table knights now carry guns
And your tales have all been rewritten.
Oh what must we do to summon back
Our old sleep-stricken king of Briton?

The world is different now, my Lord
And in new tales may you be written.
With sword in hand, Lord please striketh down
The ****** New-Rulers of Briton.

Did I assume, when writing last night
Amidst pain of fire and sweat
That Love would flee, would have strucken me,
As if they blood in my body's bereft?

I am never going to find another
No, never, not anyone so great
Your love for me may have faltered
But my love for you will stand 'gainst fate.

You'll always be the one who struck my
Heart and soul afire with flames
Of love and sweetened, kindly devotion
Even if one of our loves' to wain.

Never forget me, never forsake me
Please keep me in your mind
For maybe love will ferment again
When I am given the trials of time.

Oh God, my Lord, what have You done?
What can I do to remedy?
You made me fall so madly in love,
My life, You have taken from me?

Follow me, stick to me, never leave
Your heart may not be mine
But mine will forever be owed to you
And will stand the test of time.

Fast falling rain and
rumbling thunder.
A healing refrain,
a sky torn 'sunder.

Great are the clouds
that heal the land.
The Lord's great blessing
for fields of Man

Can I say why i love you still?
I can give you many reasons, I could write tomes of devotion, series spent on your eyes,
But, I love you unconditionally,
It took time, it wasn't instant, it was tried and tested.
I love you as you are.
No if, ands, or buts.
I love you for you, my perfect person

Can I truly speak my mind and not
Lose my train of thought?
Am I the one who's above all else?
If so, its only because of you.
Remember when I say that, verily,
Everything I love is in you!

I'm cleaning around my room
And I feel the energy shifting.
The cool breeze entering
Through the open doorway.

It is an omen
A pray for today.
Right ruddy is the face
Whose eyes stare upon my home
With a clear mind
And an open heart.

I made grand promises
Of what I'd do
To those that use
And manipulate you
My beauty, my love, my soul.

I don't know anymore
Who you truly love
And if I'm actually
The center of your world.

Oh my dear, sweet Honeybee,
Attention I have owed to thee
Every day I'll sure to be
Everything you wish of me!

I'll forever hold you close,
My dearest friend,
If platonic soulmates truly exist,
When things are finally calm,
I'll be happy to call you mine.

You make all of my senses fail
In comprehending your beauty.
Soul and body, both pristine,
My life is changed by your love.

I nary wish to hide my penned
And quoted phrases, hidden in
My nonsensical rhymes, symbolic speech
No, I shall not let my words beseech

The sanctity of openness,
The sacred land of free excess,
My page, my land, looked for with care
Where I may lay my feelings bare.

Bring forth the peering eyes, behold!
A treasury of stories told
Within the madman's wealthy rhymes,
Looking forward, or back in times.

My heart is free, my soul unhinged,
My mind consumed by thoughts less grim.
All thanks to the Muse's daughter, sweet,
Within my mind, fear I defeat.

God looked upon the glory he made,
And, Lord, did he get jealous.
He formed every being in heaven,
And yet He made you the most stunning.

He's watched you grow, evolve, and change,
And He's jealous of the happiness you give me
That He couldn't.

You make the Heavens envious!
For they know their beauty
Is nothing compared
To you, oh Muse.
Oh bright shining, radiant being,
The Tears of God are shed for thee!

A hop, jump, and skip away
Was the happiness I found today.
I can truly say in every way
That I've found my way back home.

I said what all I had to say,
We listened to our music play,
And as we laid down spoken lays,
You healed my heart of sorrow's song.

Thank you, dear, oh blessed be
The eyes that see what I can see,
For whenever I look to thee,
I know that I found my home.

I lay to rest and shut my eyes
What dream shall fall before I rise
I doze off into beauteous sleep
Oh 'I pray the Lord my soul to keep'.

Next I feel impending harm
Awe-stricken gaze peers to my arm
I watch as bugs crawl under skin
They journey in, oh journey in.

Maggots and worms and crawly things
My cries form sheer, horrific screams
My body decaying, a death-colored rot
My end be the only thing that I sought.

I woke up startled, scratching skin
Worried intruders had found a way in
Hours have passed, the feeling has not
Lord, in my mind, may my senses be fought.

Today begins the slow build
The magnificent path,
The Great Work.
Our break, needed.
The path we're on, so lovely.

Thank you, Honeybee.
You're my world

My name is Tommy
I go by Bede
Because I'm afraid to be me.

I'm obsessed with names
Because I'm ashamed
Of what I can turn mine into.

No longer!
I am Tommy
And I will be proud.

I just wish, one confession after another, that they'd be believed.
I pour my heart out into doubt, or into uncertainty, and I'm okay with pledging love to a void where I know not love goes.
Like throwing a rock into space,
I'll toss my heart into the fray,
And I'll fight tooth and nail to be the best thing for you

Summer leaves
Falls arriving.
I knew that my
Thoughts were right.

I still love her
But she cares for another
And I couldn't imagine
The fading cries.

I was a lone
But now I'm troubled.
I wish that I had
Made her smile.

My kiss, electric,
To her, it's nothing.
I am truly glad
I found this out.

I wish for nothing
Besides the better.
I want to sing
My heart's true song.

I won't let my dreams,
Remaining dreams,
Be stamped out,
But I won't let them rule over me.

But my dreams keep me
Holding on
To the life that
Others find so dear.

Who do I have?
What do I have?
Am I truly alone?

When my friends dwindle
And I've got no one,
You're still there.

Even when everyone
Around me
Can betray me.

You're still there.

So am I ever truly alone?
No, never, you won't let me.
For this, I appreciate you most.

I hold on to another day and
I watch the birds pass by.
I feel the cold autumnal wind
Caress my swollen eyes.

I do not know what it is i want
I know what it is i need.
I cannot force a persons love
Just as i can't force the seasons.

Don't be too hasty, please, for me
Take this break, keep the peace,
But don't let me break away
And float down another stream.

For you are the Whole of which I'm a part,
And, without you, I'm alone.

Fell for pine eyes,
Dressed in red, my sorrow,
Oh stricken down thy arms and thighs,
Never forget i'm the pine in his eyes.

There's nothing I can do
But show her all of my love
And wait.

I will keep trying
I don't know why i am
I forgive myself
I guess

Oh beautiful, my risen Sun,
My glorious radiant divinity.
You, the enlightener of the skies,
Warmer of hearts, thrill of the mind.

Sing praises, I, to thy wondrous name!
Who shall thy be in my world?
The brightest star, brighten the moon,
And make the night lessened so.

So, sing I the praises of you, my Sun!
My honey-worded Muse,
May my praises shine greatly,
As thy beams of warmth and love!

O Joy! Bright, beauteous being!
            Behold my jovial smile!
O Joy! Sweet soul, so sending
            My heart to golden isle!
O Joy! Great goodness, dearly
            Does my soul doth love!
O Joy! My life is yours so wholly!
            My gift from up above!

The bad may come in threes,
But you were not that.
Tragedy echoes not
The feelings within me.

You are the Great Third,
The final of the trio
The golden sheft of wheat
Given to the gods of autumn.

You are the shining sun
A glorious ray of light
But a cloud rolls past you, dear
Shadowing your might.

The tragedy may have been me
But twas it not you.
You may have torn my soul apart
But you can mend it anew.

What must I do?
Here is my list:
Make sure your attention
Is focused on her.
Love her fully, but show it this time
And don't let her hide her feelings.
Do not hide yours,
No matter if you end up hurt,
It's already happened once,
I know you'll love. I know you'll live.

Talk daily, call her, treat her just as she is viewed in your heart.
In the end, you'll still make her feel like the most important person in the world.

That is what matters the most right now

I may still be sad
But I also am graced
With the moments of clarity
And feelings of love and bliss.

The wonderful wind,
So soft on the skin,
Wraps my body like a
Person I know.

The Sun so bright,
The leaves, cascading.
The beauty of the fall
Is a wonderful thing.

Every day I walk through life
Unknowing of where to go
I only have a vague idea
Of what I'm 'sposed to know.

I'm unsure of my calling
I'm unsure of my life
I'm not too keen on these machines
That cause me all my strife.

I live a life of lying
Of looking into eyes
And telling people I'm okay
That I've still got all my tries!

But one thing is for certain
This one's not left behind
The one thing I am certain of
Is Love's right-wondrous rhyme.

What's shone since the beginning?
Since light first graced the sky?
'Twas Hatred's broodish, helly face?
No! Love's the one, says I!

So one thing is for certain
This one's left to remind
Of why I keep on chugging
And a-rollin' down the line.

That's Love is my whole reason
For dancing this foreboding dance
And if I am not careful
I could lose my last chance.

So learn to romp and tango!
Bully, my boy, dance right!
For if we Love, what have we lost?
Not nary a beautiful night!

You'll never feel
Like a disappointment
To me.

Perspective changes
Questions asked
Glad I chose
To not believe my mind.

Countless questions
With no more answers,
Yes and no
Written in her eyes.

Time will tell, dear
If my wishes come true.
Neither answer
Will stay my heart.

Yes or no, dear,
Can come in winter.
Whether this one
Or the next, or the last.

No more pain
And no more sorrow.
Time to make your
Smile shine bright.

Soft and tender
Is the Autumn.
Holy fire
Fills her skies.

The sheer power
of my old lover
Is apparent
In her waves.

The Olympian Spirits compare not to your wondrous beauty.
Their power is nothing to your smile
The dragons of the world revile
When they're pierced by your shining glow.

Your radiance appeasing Helios,
Athena admires your wit,
And Aphrodite loves your look
Every curve, every bump, is blessed.

You may not be able to look past my odd beliefs
But I adore yours
You need not khernip, for your miasma
Is as wonderful as fallen snow.

You wish to know the secret things?
Those hidden things shown unto me?
The Mystery of Mysteries, of Divine Intervention?
Then follow me into the midnight plane
And let me show you a world unseen!

Look upon the starry sky,
Do you not see the heavens aglow?
Can you not feel the magic, thick
In the air, like shrouding smoke?

Then breathe the air, smell the trees
You're going to feel odd for now
But once you let the magic in
You'll never want to let it out.