Ito na ang una't huli ang una at huling tula para sayo sapagkat ang tagal na dapat ko tung tinigil Tinigal ang pag ka tanga ko. Ang hirap diba sa simula pa lng para na akong sira kasi sa simula pa lng wala na akong magawa bigla na lng ako nahulog sayo at sa lahat ng iyng pinag gagawa kahit maliit na mga bagay ay napapansin ko sa pag kumpas ng iyung mga kamay sa matatamis **** mga ngiti sa mapupungay **** mga mata ako talaga ay na bighani pero anu ba't ang hirap talaga pero sinabi ko na may paghanga ako sayo ayun na ang pang gitna nagkakilala tayo ng lubos ang paghanga ay naging pagmamahal d mo naman ako binigo minahal mo din ako pero bakit ganun d naging tayo? ang hirap diba kasi kahit ikaw d mo yan nasagot ilang taon din ako nag hintay aking sinta pero sa mga taong yun hirap na hirap na ako pero ako ay naghihintay parin na parang tanga umaasang may tayo parin sa huli pero wala pala kaya nag paalam ako kasi d ko na kaya nanliliit na ako sa sarili ko bakit d kita mapa oo tapos biglang sinabi mo minahal mo talaga ako akala mo makakahintay ako kahit gaano katagal sabi ko oo kaya sana kitang hintayin kahit gaano katagal kung sana sa paghihintay ko wala kang kasamang iba. kaya ito na ang una't huli na tula para sayo kasi pagod na ako sa paghihintay sa wala salamat sa iyo at nagising na ako.
gusto ko makawala lahat ng sakit , d ko naisip na ganito pala ang mag sulat para sayo buti na lng hanggang guhit lng ako. mas masakita pala pag naka sulat na kaysa mga larawan lng na aking mga napinta
Yes I'm tired so very tired restless sleepless but I don't care will push through with all the will even if I be ill cause hope is present the dream is near head held high will climb the summit and raise my hand and scream I win.
There I lay in the middle of a room with 4 walls and a light staring straight right at me. Glaring like it want to say something but there was no sound. Then I laugh, its funny because even for a second there I really thought that , the light would tell me something. After a while I can hear a familiar sound, It was rain hitting the roof. Again it felt like it was saying something and yet again I started to laugh for there was no voice and i'm fooling myself how could rain tell me something. For hours I never stop staring at the ceiling with a blank thought, not even thinking of anything. Then I realized its dark, I'm pretty sure the light was on a little while back and no one had entered the room to turn it off. In my mind i'm sure its a blackout but i'm comfortable to where I lay. I didn't bothered to check. Now I'm staring at ceiling again but there was no light. The light that has been glaring at me earlier. It was pitch black. The darkness seemed to be telling me something yet in my head. Is still blank state. Then there was silence the rain have stop. It was so silent that I can hear my heart beating and even my breathing. The silence was absolutely deafening. I was scared I don't know why, as I feel the room getting and getting smaller in the darkness. The silence starts to hurt. I'm getting flash backs of my past, all of those memories sink in, in a flash. Now i'm truly scared. I tried to move but my body wont. I tried to scream but theres only whispers coming out my lips. The silence I was experiencing was truly different and the darkness was a new. Then I heard it. Loud and clear. It struck me and then I realized. What was the message. Then a lighting flashed, then the lights turned on. Thunders roared then it broke the silence. I just immediately stood up. Look at the clock, it was already 3 am, Then I said to myself what a good day to LIVE.
sometimes it takes only the thunder and lighting to remind you that you are alive.
My mind is clouded And I'm dumbfounded My hearts in doubt My soul is in blue My body still works Cause the world didn't cared Dont have no clue
The world didn't Stop when I was sad Nor it slowed down When I was Glad
Life continued, It always will Even if you're not well Or what emotion You're going to sell It will carry on Thats the truth
Its the reason of this mask To carry on Even if I'm like a robot Busted and full of rust.
I have Allot of writings when I'm sad practically most of my writings are written when I was in blue. But it didnt stop me. I always need to get out there and join the world, cause I know I can't stop the world nor it will stop for me. A harsh reality.
Tic Toc Tic Toc The clock is always winding up Waiting for me to make a mistake Even when I have nothing at stake For I have gambled everything in Love So when I lose I only lose myself In this world Thats on the mercy Of a clock.
The demons within me is far from scary. Those demons are locked up so deep that no man can dig them out. Shackled, *******.
I’m not afraid of death. I stared death through the eyes of the reaper. The demons that I hide is something no one should meet. Those demons might be bound by chain. but I still hold the key. It might be wrong to release my demons but Its not right to cross me.
I'm Nyctophilia Don't get me wrong its not what you think. Darkness is one those thing that people tend to avoid. Yes its easy to be scared when you don't know what lies ahead. I'm afraid of the dark when I was young simply because I couldn't see anything but when I tried to focus my eyes I saw the silhouette of whats in it. It might night be as clear as what light can bring but it the same thing. The trees, houses, and the other things. Then I realize how good darkness is. In a dark night you could see far greater things than what you could see in the light of the morning. Though Darkness is always portrayed as the worst time of our lives, Lets not forget that in those times we learned the best lesson life can bring. Its like our future we don't know what it brings or what could happen. What we are in control is the current time the Present. Yet like darkness its the same we are in control if are going to be scared to not. Face darkness until it becomes your friend. Remember in the morning you can only see the sun but in the night you can see countless stars with the bonus view of the moon and if your lucky there is also a shooting star in store for you.
To those who are afraid in the dark don't be its a beautiful sight to see also,!
1ST STEP is to tell her you "LOVE" her Take her to the SEA and understand her depth don't be afraid of the 1st step don't worry for love is cheap its also a big leap for love is priceless and its also timeless
2ND is to take it slow enjoy every moment cherish it all the time climb every MOUNTAIN that both of you & her will face and "TRUST" that you both will see the summit Together.
3RD is to have "FAITH" and to remain faithful with each other its time to take flight and to stay in the SKIES you and her deserves the feeling of cloud nine.
The recipe of a happy relationship , this might be true for others, or this might not be but I truly believe its for me.
I dream to be more than I am. The dream to become another one. The one who wants to make things right. So I always tried to be shined with the light.
Tonight I will write something that I might like, That may allow me to take flight. and show you what its like. To be a boy who wanted to be a man.
Go to the light. Its the right path they say. It where you will find the way. The summit, the peak, the end. and claim everything.
But the darkness calls me and I couldn't do a thing. It wanted me to stay. Like i'm its prey.
No matter how fast I run it pulls me back. Now I realize that to be a man. I needed a plan. Because going through the dark is not like a walk in the park. I might need to crawl. and bump into a wall. but It wont stop me because in the end I need to stand tall. for darkness is just part of the journey. A path to make, A chance to take. So that boy may be able to become a man.
For years im always at awe. With your writings. For years I have been a big fan of you. You have that special touch with every verses you write. And I couldnt say no more. You encourage me to write. And I have written Allot of stories but more of you. I dont know why but I have kept searchin for your poems. The day you have deleted or maybe blocked me from your tumblr. I felt devastated for I was obsessed And I was already drowned by how deep you write. Now I followed you here but I cant even follow you. For Im scared and Im still puzzled. May this reach you. My dear partner gwyn.
Gwyn I miss your soul in your poems and I dont know what to feel no more.
Sadness echoes throughout my body. Vibrates deep into my shallow soul Radiating outside in form of tears I guess my heart never learned that you're already gone and it really hurts The time you whispered goodbye. BUT ME I ALL OF ME WILL ALWAYS WAIT FOR YOU
For days now im having allot of flash backs. From every moment of my life from good to bad. Even those memories I kept inside not because they were nightmares but because they were beautiful dreams and Im afraid that it wont happen again. Its blackout and now its raining hard. I decided to sit near the door just far enough not to get wet. But outside it was like the inside of our house , it was pitch black but the silhouette of the trees are clear. Then comes an airplane rerouting it seemed for it circled away. Then a flash back came . And again it started. I remember all the beautiful things that happened to me in the past years. I smiled then a car cross in front of the house the light was bright then another batch of memories came now it was those memories that you want to be just nightmares but it wasnt, Now im having shivers and tears fall. The past has hunted me down again. For years I tried to fight my way out but for years I failed. Now I decided to run because I think thats the only way to be free from these binds but only to see myself shackled up once again. As the shackles felt heavy. I felt giving up. Lighting Flashed. Then I saw a face. Then thunders roared then it vanished. Who was that. I ask myself , the heavy shackles felt a little lighter now. A lightning flashed again then comes another face. Comes the thunders then it fade. The shackles felt lighter and lighter as faces vanishes. Then Again I ask myself who were those . For minutes lightning flashed and thunders roared. A face shows up and vanishes away. Im still puzzled but then I realized who were they. They where my demons, my past that I was so afraid off. Only then I have realized that those demons are not locked up anymore because I didnt hide them I already conquered them. And I was running away from mere illusions. My past was really behind me now and they are not nightmares but just memories. Then I smiled again.
dont fear the memories, for they are only reminders that you have overcome them.
She wanted to drown herself In her own puddle But her tears is still to shallow Her body feels numb and hollow She tried to run like theres no tomorrow. Thinking that someone will follow Now she's broken and a mess But she realized she couldn't care less.
Its not real it all made up in our mind, even in our heart but for only this day take a step take risk for all of us may have a dreamt something impossible man always dreamed of something we thought impossible to be achieved yet today we are flying and have set foot on the moon and we are not stopping there.
Dreams are only illusions if we dont take steps. if we dont risk it. if we forget about it.
You ask for help When you are blue And have no clue But you also left When you already received The help you want I know its selfish to ask you To ask me For my help, cause I dont mind I just dont want you to leave me behind.
Pls, you have trap me and im craving for you but its sad cause I know you dont need me anymore.
I just want to say I'm still puzzled and confused allot has been happening so fast and so soon It's a rush my mind and my heart just can't keep up but I want it I want everything that's happening even when I don't understand even when I don't think I deserve this I want to keep it cause even though I'm confused there's an invisible smile that you cant see the happiness and joy inside of me cause I want it I want you I want to keep you and the love. Maybe you cant see this smile but it wont fade away This invisible smile will going to stay.
For those person who you thought thats just a dream but they are not they are real and you have them to hold and to love.
Theres allot of things that I wanted to be lie. And theres allot of things I wanted to be the truth.
Like the day you told me. "I wont leave you" I wanted that to be true. Or When they said "everything gonna be fine" Even when they told me about the toothfairy, the easterbunny, santa or even the grinch. I wanted them to be all true.
Yet they always tell lies To somehow make us feel okay. But in the end we will realized that everything was a lie.
But I wanted allot of things to be a lie.
•Anxiety •Depression •prejudice •sadness
I wanted them to be a lie because Im tired of lying and hiding the truth.
Im tired of saying "I'm Okay" Im tired of saying "Good Morning , Day, or Night" Im tired of showing a smile that only hides whats inside.
I want a time Where my lies will be seen as lies and the truth may be seen.
Me and you were the greatest team. The best duo. Partners! That's who we were! or what we claimed to be.
We were not afraid nor confused of what we have or what we don't Everything figured out Cherishing all the moment Loving all times
But look where we are now both far from each other we seem to be strangers what have we done? what did fail to do? we ask ourselves
I chased you though you where running away. I knock on your door even you slammed it in my face. I waited though you have forgotten. I understood you yet you don't know. I reach out but you just let go.
You inspired me to write you showed me how. To express how we feel but look at me now Writing this sad story of Me and You.
Thank you for everything though, Right now I feel that Im lost but writing did help me to cope.
When you find someone who is thankful to have you, is concerned for your well-being, accepts you as you are, cheers you up whenever you’re down, motivates and supports you in your endeavors, cares for you deeply, and loves you unconditionally,
treasure and keep that person. Make him/her feel important in return. Care for him/her the way he/she does for you. Love him/her with no reservations. You may not know it, but you have found a friend for life in him/her. God has given you that person for a purpose, so keep him/her in your heart and prayers.
The thing about life is that we shouldn’t not pursue anything with bad attitude, Never say I don’t like to do this and that’s why I wont do good. That I would messed this up. Always have a positive view about it, even though, its not really your passion once you do that you win over it.
But its necessary to do that what you like because its what makes you really happy. Doing things that makes us happy is one of the privileges that we can claim. Never think that something is stopping you, never think for a second that you couldn’t do it. That you would not try it because in reality those who never tried are the once who really lost. Its not those who tried and failed. Never quit in trying even if you have only a small chance if you put your heart and put all of your effort into it eventually you could do it. No matter how rough the road is.
The end is near so they speak. The end is truly near for this year. Everyday we rushed into things. We take a time of one duty to fullfill another . We feel the day is long if we did allot of things but its the opposite. We rushed into things thats isnt its due time we think about the future but barely grasping what is in the present. Living our daily lives like an upgraded robot. Doing things in a rushed manner. We forgot to cherished the present the work we are doing because we are looking into the future the product of our work. How many minutes, hours and days we lost because we are to eager to see the future when the present matters most.
One night. One man dared to be free. Free from himself, Free from all, he got tired of the feeling of being controlled by a system that makes him no better than a robot. So he walked miles through the darkness of the path, he murmored. "I Will be free. I will be Free. Im tired at the same time im sick. Sick of being me." He continued to walk as he reached the side of a river and Cold winds blows to his shoulders like the frozen touch of winter. He got shivers throughout his body and said to himself this is it Im free. The day number one. Then he was puzzled and asked himself what does a free man do? Not knowing the answer and he has no one to ask for he is alone. Then he sat at the bank of the river and he contemplated and again ask himself what does a free man do? Who should I ask? I know allot of people but I dont know who among them is free. He was stumped for the deeper he thinks the harder to answer to his own question. After a while he stops thinking and just look around. Then he saw the river just flowing not caring for as long as it flows but in a a distant sight he saw a wall that was redirecting the flow of the river. And got stomped again for he thought he already the answer but he doesnt. Then as he looked at the sky and he laughed so hard. For sunrise is quite close. Then he realized I am free for I can do this. I am free because I am me and no one can do it better than me.
Within us, is a voice that no one ever heard off. A sound wanted to go out Yet its forbidden and not allowed
For we are always ask don't Don't speak your mind. It's what they always say now you're silent and you cant be someone you are destined to become
Still we continued to be silent For we are afraid, Scared of what it can do that's what on our mind
The little voice inside us only wanted to be heard Now we want it to drown into the abyss of nothingness and stay in that void for we are afraid of what others think.
Not knowing its potential it stayed there stuck with all the other noises Noises that always rendered and deemed it as useless Those noises kept you chained with the guilt of voicing it out. Dragging you further down.
Creativity and all of your wonderful imaginations cant come out for its locked up for you are SILENT and always afraid of what others think, always waits for the approval of others.
Now you kept it all in You will never learn to fly because you wrapped your VOICE with fear and guilt.
Be strong always , its hard to voice out and its always a risk but its a risk worth taking.
We are from the tallest tree on top of the mountain feeling so free you hold me so tight so the wind and the rain wont take me but when the lightning hit you didn't let go you hold on to me and broke the fall now the flood pushed us to the stream yet you still hold on to me telling me its just a bad dream when rain was out the water was calm now we continued to flow down telling me its okay we will reach the sea and we will again be free but it rained again now the water is harsh it flowed so fast didn't thought I will last but you hold me close and hold me tight until We got stuck in a stone against the flow I was shocked that you just let go as I continue to flow I saw you smiled and yelled I'm stuck and can't get out so continue to flow and reach the sea I just wanted you to be FREE.
Afraid and Anxious of Being something I'm not Conscious about everything Dying to be Everything I want but wheres the Fun in that. Go out and Have fun. Its strange how I changed. Jeers where the sound track of my life. Knowing that many have been cheering Lamenting of the days I should have fought. Mountains where not made to Nor overcome. That what I thought I have this OBSESSION of Painting my way by asking allot of Questions that I shouldn't have ask. Race that I shouldn't have joined cause I'm Sedentary. I'm afraid to move. Timid and Nervous. Fear is Ubiquitous for everyone, but its Victory over me is for sure. but Wait its not the end because I'm the stranger of Xenization, forever travelling alone Yearning to be with somebody. This is the end and the start Zero, yes I started with an A&Z is the end cause I always feel WORTHLESS.
Turning point of my life. A care free lazy person. Thats who I was. I didnt really cared what would be the consequences of my action, im too lazy to even bother to think about it. All I know that everything that would happen in the future is the conclusion of your present actions. May it be bad or good. I would always say "NO REGRETS". Yes there were none for my actions but it always the opposite for the action that I didnt made. These "REGRETS" have hunted me for a while now because I realize that not all things in the future is the result of the action you made but it could be also the result of the ones you didnt. The future which is the result of the actions you didnt made, ***** because no matter how I will try to face it, I will eventually lose because no matter how strong I think I am then. It doesnt change the fact that I was afraid of making those actions. No matter how much I drown myself in alcohol or tears. Nothing will change, believe me I really tried. Now the only thing I can do is make peace with my past accept that I was weak. Accept that I was once afraid. Acknowledge that I made a mistake. And now I will try to be a little braver because now I know my mistake. And I urge everyone I know to take the risk be brave to take action. Take flight and do good.