"starve" poems
To all the goodbyes
I say goodnight
To everyone that dies
I hope it's bright
To everyone;
With a razor
Hand of pills
Tied rope
Dangling keys
Extreme height below
Finger over a light trigger
Electricity at hand
Open propane tank
Empty plate, with full glass
Stop, think about who you're leaving behind
I know my words aren't going to stop you, but just read
Did you bother to write and leave a note?
Is it worth it then?
Saying you're sorry, knowing you'll leave someone behind?
Stop. Think about why you're doing it
Do you have nobody?
Think about your opportunities that'll fly past
The chance of ever meeting someone?
Did you lose someone?
Think about if you'll actually see them again?
Being bullied?
Fight back, with whatever you have
Life shoved you down?
No, I'm not asking you to get up!
I'm telling you to get your *** into a nap
Think about all the possibilities that might not be
Think of all the opportunities and people in the future
Think of your legacy
Think of anything except the pain
Now balance the pain and everything else
Want to jump? Skyfall
Want to shoot? Paintball and games
Want to hang? Bungee
Want to overdose? Take 10% of it and party
Suffocate in propane gas, or blow up? Cook a nice meal, invite a friend or family. Surround yourself. No friends and family? Find a friend, build a family.
Want to speed wrong side of the road? Speed on the right side of the road and get carried with the wind, do it over again
Want to cut yourself? Cut off the pain and wrong influences
Electrocute yourself? Rather save electricity and watch a good movie with friends or family. Have none? Watch a movie alone, play a game online. Make friends, build a family
Want to starve yourself so you can get drunker and finally forget it all, when your liver gives in? Eat a lot more, blow off some steam at the gym and build a body that girls/guys would like, attract them and make new friends. Drink with friends.
I've tried many things, some of them didn't work out, or I couldn't stay awake longer. Create new dreams if the old ones died. Work hard for them. Achieve something
"At least leave a ******* legacy behind" is what my bestfriend, Steph used to say
"You can get out of this alive, but maybe a little ****** up, but anything damaged can be repaired" My bestfriend Josh used to say
"Life can carry you away without what you thought you needed" my bestfriend Divene used to say
Even more quotes from people I've lost in my life, so I ask you just think about it all
Still going through with it? Remember it's a one way ticket
Aug 30, 2018
Aug 30, 2018 at 7:16 AM UTC
They act like foolish mice
lost in a maze,
with heart eyes, who only admire
and send praise;
so blown away, and
stuck in a dumb daze.
It’s amusing they excuse
your wicked ways,
and you can gladly starve
them all for days;
while smiling madly, not even fazed.
They’re dim and dull,
you need entertained.
You can’t help it, you think,
but don’t dare say,
to sustain your pointless little games;
that you can’t ever seem to abstain.
It’s the higher ground
you need to gain.
So lure them in enduring
your demented cage.
Provoke their wrath and
force them to cave,
spread your foul poison to
their every vein.
There’s no denying they’re enslaved,
locked tight in your chains.
Feb 13, 2018
Feb 13, 2018 at 11:24 PM UTC
I don't care if you
Throw sticks
Or stones
Or grenades.
You won't hurt me,
I'll pick myself up.
I don't care if you
Call me stupid
Or ugly
Or a failure, a disappointment.
You won't hurt me,
I'll shut it all out.
I don't care if you
**** a frog
Or rob the bank
Or starve for days.
I won't bat an eyelid,
That's what others' did to me.
I have been made
Cruel and heartless
By this warped, greedy world.
If it won't affect me,
I won't care.
Apr 2, 2014
Apr 2, 2014 at 11:17 PM UTC
I feel lonesome hands approaching mine
to walk me through the desert.
I tense my arms against the open night sky
which cannot be pushed away.
I want you to love my grey skies,
my pensivity that rolls across mountain ranges -
the same to me as sunshine igniting streams.
Just a different lens
through which my creature plays with light.
She is elemental
and sloughs skin off the earth like lava flowing
into the ocean to close its eyes.
I'll eat my own tail
to discover what I already know.
May 30, 2019
May 30, 2019 at 12:55 PM UTC
to the the girls who starve themselves,
the ones that watch their carbs,
you want to feel adored
you´re personality is fading
they´ll eventually get bored.
while striving for more
you settle for less
you can´t seem to love yourself
step on the scale, there go a few numbers
along with your happiness
Apr 30, 2019
Apr 30, 2019 at 12:25 PM UTC
Mirror, Mirror, on my wall,
I just want to be thin, pretty and tall.
Mirror, Mirror, if I change my hair,
Maybe someone will start to care?
Mirror, Mirror, if I starve myself,
At least I’ll be beautiful, forget my health.
Mirror, Mirror, if I cut my wrist,
Will I feel like I exist?
Mirror, Mirror, don’t you see?
What you show, is ruining me.
May 25, 2015
May 25, 2015 at 2:59 PM UTC
This pink mass of mist
it glows when we touch
my waking has surrendered
it belongs to you
but the boulder
this crippling weight still sits
misty fog can't fly
can't float
never could
that rocky weight
it finally caught a cloud
and pinned it down
i didn't mean to show you
i never wanted you to see this
this amazingly heavy burden I carry
please don't let it catch your cloud
maybe I too often feel like a burden
only because I have lived as one
and this fear of being what I am
it adds ounces every day
maybe that's what I've been trying to get rid of
not my earthly weight
but the one that caught my cloud
Is that the one I've been trying to starve out?
Jul 2, 2014
Jul 2, 2014 at 11:27 PM UTC
How is it possible...
To hate yourself as much as I do?
To look down at yourself,
And break out in tears because of what you see.
And there's nothing you can do about it,
But try to change,
And be somebody you aren't.
Try to be the same person,
With a different shell,
And be perfect.
How can you hate yourself to the point you want to get rid of yourself,
Or to the point that you cut and bruise,
And starve.
How can you hate yourself as much as I do?
How does one be happy?
Jan 2, 2014
Jan 2, 2014 at 5:00 PM UTC
We play holi with colours,
And soldiers play it with guns and rifles.
At the risk of their own life,
They give us comfortable sleep and life.
A soldier is never sure of his life ,
And will he ever meet his daughter, son and wife.
Hats off and a dozen of salute,
Is nothing above a soldier and his sacrifice.
Besides a soldier his family also compromises,
Children sometimes starve to spent time with their father,
Mother's sometime don't even get to see dead bodies of their only son.
And what to say about the love of a wife,
Her sacrifices and compromises are just priceless.
After death a soldier is only remembered for a month or two,
Media is told to stay away too.
Payment of his life is done by some amount of money,
Is that all our duty towards our indian army?
This often chills my spine,
And brings a million years in my eyes.
A great salute to the Indian Army,
From the bottom of my heart.
I would help them anytime if they need me,
With each and everything I have.
Jul 27, 2017
Jul 27, 2017 at 11:27 PM UTC
S • Skin tight, skeletal cage
both ribs and mind.
K • Keep a strict diet, never break it, always hide it from those who would disapprove, so I learned to suffered in silence.
I • Internally a growl would emit, I reveled in the power I would get from it. To know I was structured, I wasnt a jumbled mess. Like the mass jiggling, clingling to this withering carcass.
N • Never could the fat girl come back out. carve her, choke her, starve her till she lost the will to shout. Shout for help, shout for freedom, shout for love in this life. Useless, everybody knows only fit people have that right.
N • Nobody would believe if I told a soul my struggle. "You are huge, big blue
whale how can someone like you have a disorder?
Y• Yell, scream "I WANT TO BE ME"
But I can't because of our society
deeming people like me are wrong,
why should my weight define wether or not I belong?
But because it does I hate myself.
I live this life with a wish to die,
all because my body is not
S•K•I•N•N•Y
Sep 17, 2016
Sep 17, 2016 at 9:34 PM UTC
Today in an overweight society,
The type of society that deals anxiety,
Anxiety, anxiety, in this overweight society.
Today in an overweight society,
The type of society where diet pills are a normality,
Normality, Normality in an overweight society.
Today in the eyes of an underweight tragedy,
Influenced so greatly by an overweight society,
Tragedy, Tragedy, in an overweight society.
Influenced by a society of fatty foods,
Fear becoming a more common mood,
The fear of falling into the normality
The normality of this tragedy.
The overweight society.
Influence by obesity.
Striving to be what their minds see,
The minds of the children trapped,
Trapped by this overweight society.
Influenced by the skinny girls on TV
Only followed by ads showing fatty foods society demans you eat
Have a cheeseburger, upgrade to a large fry, yet still look like her, it's pounded in her mind.
Young minds believe what they see.
Morphed into the tragedy of society.
A society where eating disorders strive
A society where an 8 year old can consious you starve themselve to feel pretty.
The definition of pretty based simply on TV
Yet nobody questions this more than imperfect society.
Elementary ages childern being fed fat then forced to stand in front of a mirror.
Put a toy in poison and call it magic.
Oh yes, what a fantasy.
A fantasy forcing you into reality.
The reality becoming your worst nightmare.
The reality of your fears driven by society.
I'm overweight, yet pizza is the best choice for a happy family.
A society where mental illness strives.
Why can't people open their eyes?
Spoon feeding childern poison and expecting them to love themselves.
In school teachers force health into thier minds.
At home, parents feed them poison to save time.
Re-creating, reprogramming their fragile little minds, yet still expecting them to feel fine.
Feeling down?
Have a happy meal, gain a pound.
Overweight?
Shame, shame, you must maintain the image.
The image forced into your mind.
This was our greatest fall.
Upon dieting we call.
Skelington stave me.
Anorexia at it's finest.
Anorexia thin and spineless.
Some call you timeless.
But only recently you made your debute.
Make me feel brand new.
Reprogram my mind.
Make me feel fine.
Thank God for thinsperation.
Oh Anorexia, my new inspiration.
Make me feel pretty.
Just like the skinny girls on TV.
Loosing pounds, one by one.
Still weighed down by a ton.
The weight of pleasing it.
The nightmare society created.
Influenced by what we see.
Finally morphed into the tragedy of the normality of this weight obsessed society.
Apr 9, 2018
Apr 9, 2018 at 3:44 PM UTC
Doctor after doctor says
"How are you feeling?'
Watch schizophrenics go to the quiet room
Where they don't hear the voices
I shouldn't be here
I'm not that crazy
You try not to say out loud
Then again your mind
Becomes rational
For just a split second
And my mind goes
"You need to be here"
When you realize
You cut your emotions skin deep
Purge up all my sanity
And starve away all the names
I suddenly realize
That i belong here
In a mental ward
ED is silent he re
I like this place
He has no control over me
Here
Skin and bones
Hunger is a lovely feeling
Messed up i know
This is what i crave
Sep 3, 2014
Sep 3, 2014 at 5:27 PM UTC
We are always trying to become equal
what makes it so special?
That is unique to human nature
to idealize and to hope
And yet,
life isn't fair.
And nature doesn't pretend otherwise
Neither should we.
The lion doesn't starve
to protect the endangered zebra.
No matter how much we fight nature,
We can’t control it.
Apr 22, 2014
Apr 22, 2014 at 8:32 PM UTC
The birds fly free over the oceans surface,
circling the waters edge.
*You are the ocean and I am the bird,
I may take the plunge, but you have
to be willing to supply a fish.*
Without you I would starve.
Nov 7, 2013
Nov 7, 2013 at 1:15 AM UTC
My tummy needs a yummy,
Like a plummy tasty gummy.
I'm in a slummy feeling crummy,
Give me something in my tummy.
Please don't treat me like a scummy,
And don't look at me like a dummy.
I don't want to drink a rummy,
But a yummy in my tummy.
Mommy can I get a yummy,
I don't want to starve my tommy.
Please offer me some plummy tasty gummy.
Jun 9, 2014
Jun 9, 2014 at 12:58 AM UTC
You ask me
If I've considered suicide
Like I'm actually going to answer
Honestly
I mean,
What would I say?
Yeah that's all I think about
Please,
Put me on piles of medicine
So I can be crazy
As well as sad
But let me tell you
I most definitely
Have considered it
I've got the perfect tree picked out
It's got the perfect branch
For hanging yourself
There's a rope already attached
Or if you prefer,
It's easy to climb
You could always just jump
These are two options
But wait,
I've got more
There's a lake out back
It smells bad
But you could definitely still drown
Or better still,
There's a great knife in the kitchen
Really thin blade
But it's super sharp
For minimum pain
And maximum blood
Yet still,
There's more
I've got duct tape in the basement
You could make yourself suffocate
Of course,
You could use your pillow for that
There are the long ways
You could starve yourself
Sleep deprivation
Dehydration
Etcetera
So Mr.
"Psychological Doctor,"
I don't know...
Would you say I've thought about suicide?
Jun 6, 2015
Jun 6, 2015 at 9:01 PM UTC
There is a cake.
There is a beautiful, rounded
Vanilla swiss buttercream well-iced cake
That they gave to you.
This cake makes me miss you
Makes me miss running my fingers
Throughout your hair
And gently pressing my own soft lips
To yours, Instead of your lips pressing
this stupid cake.
And I know that you love it.
And I know that if you do not have
every ounce
You will starve.
I was jealous of this cake, I admit
Jealous indeed of the shiny new replacement
They gave for you for my love
It made you feel good inside and out, as well
Enriched your brain, and your appetite
I was jealous and stole a slice in spite of you.
Then I realized, that you love this cake
You have waited for this cake, every year
Every birthday
Hoping for the envelope informing you
That the time for cake was now
That the cake WAS your time, now, and that
All of you was invested, in this succulent dessert
And you needed to keep as much as you could,
for your sake,
I came to accept the fact, that you needed so.
But like your hair, I brush this cake
with the tips of my fingers, I taste this cake
I understand the sweetness you enjoy
and the sanctity of it being left alone
But if I dare to kiss this cake
because I adore the things you care about so much
and some icing comes onto my lips
Have I stolen something from you?
Nov 5, 2011
Nov 5, 2011 at 2:45 PM UTC
1125
Oh Sumptuous moment
Slower go
That I may gloat on thee—
’Twill never be the same to starve
Now I abundance see—
Which was to famish, then or now—
The difference of Day
Ask him unto the Gallows led—
With morning in the sky—
9.7k
Education is currently being used as a weapon
to arm the educated to defend the system.
Question the system.
Go out there and equip yourself for the right belief.
Be a dreamer. The dream is beautiful.
The problem with dreams is that you don’t know
the dream has turned into a nightmare until you wake up.
Are you awake? Be awake.
The problem with being awake; we need to rest.
Lucidly dream. Be lucid.
The problem with being lucid; you’re lucid.
There was a dream not long ago. The dream was beautiful.
We liked the dream, the dream became ours and we slept.
Slowly we all grew tired.
Those that did not need to sleep,
those that did not like our dream,
we treated like children.
We know that we need to rest and we were tired. We left our children to starve.
We forced others to sleep and so, we forced our children to sleep.
Even in our sleep, we forced others to sleep.
And so the big dream grew.
It became nightmare.
We all dream. Be aware of others dreams. Be aware of others while we sleep.
Be aware of those that sleep while we awaken.
When you wake and see your siblings rest no longer.
That their dream, once ours, has turned to terror.
The problem with dreams…
We force our children to sleep.
Is this bad? Always question. Should we force them to wake?
Force can create. Force can destroy.
The problem with being awake, when we know our brothers and sisters
sweat in there nightmares; we have a choice.
That is not a choice to wake them or not. To hope for the best.
That the nightmare will end and the dream will return.
A dream that has travelled
through the terrors of our minds
will not return the same.
Would you like the red pill or the blue pill?
Is there good and bad? Force can create and destroy.
Be mindful of how you wake.
Be lucid of how you force others to wake.
Tea or coffee; a cigarette; some breakfast; some fear?
Use balance.
We are all unique.
I have a personal story. As I wrote this, typos occurred in the original edit.
The technology, ‘swipe’ was used. I meant to spell unique and unite was spelt.
Personal became powerful and with turned to WE.
Is there a reason ‘i’ should always be capitalized?
‘i’ wish to be mindful of my readers. ‘i’ want to stay true to them.
We that can read are the readers. ‘i’ am the reader.
When I isn’t capitalized I began to feel more comfortable with using it,
if i gave it arms; ‘i’.
And when I typed to explain that,
I went to preferring if isn’t typing out ‘and then i and then ‘, to just type two of them;
ii.
We don’t want to be alone.
There’s no I in teamwork but
there is and I in kind.
I is complicated. Be you.
Find your voice. Have a voice and be aware.
Others have a voice.
What would happen if we all respected each other’s voice?
What would happen if we all had the same voice?
That was the beauty of the dream.
The dream is travelling through nightmare
and is slowly returning.
It has changed.
Unite our uniqueness’s.
Do you eat fast food? I love it. It is a dream… Do I eat it all the time, I hope not.
Ken Robinson is a good man to ask. Consider food for the mind.
There are beliefs out there. There’s a belief out there that our world is ******
Forgive the language. Understand it.
I wanted to say, ‘that our world is doomed; eternally ****** to be destroyed’ and that scared me. **** There will always be nightmares, disaster and destruction.
What is an ‘aster’? Curious.
When did we chose to destroy; each other?
Could we create; each other?
There’s a belief out there for that one too.
Are you awake, yet?
Sep 22, 2012
Sep 22, 2012 at 9:06 AM UTC
i starve myself for this moment
gifting you my delicate sensibility emptying my body for you
bearing my scars wide open
let you touch my vulnerabilities
you swim through my body back and forth
cut my skin layer, after layer, after layer
no corner is unknown to your touch
your firm hands exploring my every parts
you grab me, lift me, toss me
taste my honesty and fears
fill my body from the tip of my hair to my toes
break the wall in me as you penetrate my soul
pull the innocence from between my legs like silk
conjure beauty in me
make the bitterness in me disapear
you break me, brick, by brick, by brick, by brick
pull my hair, tilt my head
drain every muscle in me
we break walls that leads to others, that leads to trap doors, that leads to infinities
the past and the future merge into one to meet us in our present
we breathe as one, form a unity
one body, one soul, one purpose
we connect, interlock, intertwine
we levitate to an infinity of desire
reach the line between reality and transcendance
the moon and the sun both witnessing the beauty we're creating
we ****** and create an explosion of billions and trillions of blooming flowers
piece by piece, you build me back up
bit by bit, we emerge from the magic we made
from caterpillar to a butterfly
We are born again!
Jul 30, 2018
Jul 30, 2018 at 11:32 AM UTC
I met a girl named Ana
she is beautiful in every possible way
her body is perfect, and she was
determined to stay
I made a friend named Ana
she promised to tell me her secrets of perfection
what I didn't know wouldn't **** me
until it led to addiction
my best friends name is Ana
she's always talking to me
recommending to skip two meals
maybe even three
I hate a girl named Ana
she promised me pleasure
instead I feel dead inside
it's nothing but torture
I'm prisoner to a girl named Ana
please, somebody listen to my silent crys
I can't speak my own mind
help me before I die!
my murders name is Ana
she made me starve, she made me weak
death wasn't the solution
I tried to seek
Feb 26, 2015
Feb 26, 2015 at 11:46 PM UTC
Come forward Ramadan
I await your arrival
The hearts are ill
And they need to be cured
Come and spread your joy
Of double rewards
As heavens doors open
And prayers are answered
Show me all I have to be thankful for
And help me think of the needy
Those who go without food or water for days
And yet still how my Lord provides
Come and show me
When Satan is locked away
Am I being tempted
Or are these sins force of habit
Ramadan come
And remind us of our purpose
Surround us with a humble atmosphere
Where brothers and sisters unite
Dawn till dusk
I will not simply starve
But be on my best behaviour
No foul language or thinking the worst of someone
I will join the congregation
At each and every prayer
Speak kindly
And spend more time with my family
In the month of God's mercy
I will try my best to please
Become a better person
And carry through these deeds
Jun 28, 2014
Jun 28, 2014 at 3:49 AM UTC
She looks in the mirror;
Oh, how ugly! You say.
She touches her soft pink lips;
And you remind her of her ugly lies.
Ugly lies! Ugly lies!
Only trash coming from her heart.
She looks at her eyes;
Her dull, soulless eyes —
You tell her, how bland!
How flat and bleak!
It’s because of all the things
That she has seen.
She looks at her body;
You say, what an ugly mess!
You have all these fats
Placed in the wrong spots.
Why not starve yourself to death?
She turns around and looks at her back
You remind her
Of the ugly gnarled scars
And how she was backstabbed
By all that she loved
Because she is insecure
And will never be loved.
Jul 23, 2016
Jul 23, 2016 at 9:12 AM UTC
I have no voice,
**Because I have been vomiting up pills each and every morning,
getting into my old anna habits you may say,**
I don't wanna live on an ADHD diet,
**the pills **** with me,
I'm 174.0lb please,**
*I am a little heavy,
but it's to the point where,*
I was 220,
and I could barely breath,
when I had a panic attack,
so my mom is helping me lose weight,
but pills that make me starve myself,
are ones I wanna do without,
**so I ***** each day before I eat,**
after I consume the pills,
because she won't let me get off them,
you think im crazy,
but I've lost my weight the way I wanted to,
*changed my eating styles,
getting rid of the junk food,*
eating healthy,
trying to get over some of my sensory issues,
**without having to take a ******* ADHD pill for the last month,**
*I've lost more weight doing that,
then skipping a meal because I had no hunger,
due to medication,*
But I'm being healthy about it,
But I'm also not,
because I told you,
*I ***** my pills everyday,*
so I'm losing my voice,
like I did,
In my elementary school days,
May 24, 2015
May 24, 2015 at 11:24 AM UTC