You Need Me
-depression-

The only thing that brings him out  
is when I feel that sweet melancholy.
-blessed to be stressed-
A quest to impress.

Not you, but him.

I love what I am but I'd hate to foresee
the potential you'd waste outside of me.

I'll build you up, recraft your name
new hobbies, posts, a little new fame.
cute pics, new tricks, some confidence.
its simple
you're a quick mix fix.

I'm as easy as can be, I know that you see
that a little productivity can keep me at ease.

you always let me go, lazy yet mindful.
you may be stoic but I know your prideful.

Take me as a sign because in this shrine

I need chaos.
uncertainty.
the unknown.

how deep down the rabbit hole will I take you?
either way, for now
you're mine.

I want you to hurt, so we can grow.
I'll let you rest when we get old.
Then we'll reflect on all I've done for you.

Where do we go as the oar man rows?
I see no light down this stream we flow.
Where do we go as the oar man rows?
In these crossroads I just don't know.

Do you know my dear mother?
Can you hear me, oh father?

Where do we go?
Where do we go?
Where do we go as the oar man rows?

Are there Angels?
Are there Demons?
what am I now?

I am frightened
of the darkness
of the oarsman.

Where do we go as the oar man rows?
Do we just die or do we have souls?
Where do we go as the oar man rows?
Down this dark stream I've come to know.

Where do we go?
Where do we go?
Where do we go as the oar man rows?

The animals are running.
Night is befalling us.
Sickened twines clench within.
 
Forbidden gardens shy their eyes.
Insects crumble beneath the earth.
The steeple light banishes.
 
Appease the darkness
or succumb your will.
Fear the loathing cold.
 
Shadows creep among trees
the birds flock to chase day
I stand arms open waiting for the change.
 
Only the moonlight's madness can veer
prospecting the future of lost outcomes.
The forest holds it's breath.
 
Howling winds guide the dark chill
Everything is gone, the light has vanished
Nothing can be sure of tomorrow.

I am the lust of the softest touch
or the rushing lush when your hair gets brushed.

I am the fear in the darkest nights
Within the long alley roads and eerie street lights.

I am the cringe when your lover cheats
with crippling thoughts beneath the sheets.

I am the excitement of the thief's retreat
or the killer as he ends a thumping heart beat.

I am the feeling of guilt in your shame
as you're being confronted and you know you're to blame.

I am the bliss of your very first kiss
when you're feeling so nervous you'll probably miss.

I am the crawling underneath your skin
as a loud thud slams on your door to get in.

I am the desire of your secret fantasies
the ones which you have in your wildest dreams.

I am the chill when they whisper in your ear
as they pull you in tight, it makes the goose flesh appear.

Have you seen the man in the shed?
Putrid flies ***** as they eat at his head.                                        
                   ­                               
He's naked, alone, ******* on the ground
his genitals removed and fed to the hound.

Teeth lay barren amongst torn flesh
the smell of the man is rank but fresh.  
                                                        ­        
Eyes, lips and **** sewn shut.
Foul fluids are smeared as they crust like rust.
                          
He tried to crawl away where the path of blood lay but it seems the man has decided to stay.
  
It's hard to believe but I know what I found, I even heard the man make a faint little sound.    
                                                    
S­o I painted his nails red, purple and blue, can we keep him mommy, please tell me it's true!

I choose ignorance to influence,  I just want to be.
I've never heard God's word nor has he heard me.

Step by step I move my two feet
walking the path to my own righteous beat.

Though I'm good at heart and kind in soul.
am I supposed to fear the angels toll?

Who made these sins they sound like life
are we puppets for hell, what is this strife?

A fool to believe the lies of a book
so literally influenced, you took the hook.

To enter these gates you must yield perfection
now time for reflection let's start the election.

Now you fear, afraid to live
as if good is something hard to give.

You can't be yourself you struggle to please
now drop for forgiveness and beg on your knees.  

I walk my own path I choose my own fate
if God is so judging then **** his high gate.

It's hard to see logic when I only hear lies
it's tough to keep fighting when you're running in disguise.

I need to know the truth but when I stare into your eyes
every second that I look it seems a piece of me dies.  

You wear this mask to hide your face
its shame and guilt that took its place.

Tell me please what have I done
I fear my hand which holds this gun.  

Was it me who lost your heart
Or was it he who made it start?  

Tell me *****, did you love this fling
I can't hear you past this awful ring.

No more lies just tell me straight  
Oh no you're dead, I shot, too late...

Wandering paths, meandering doors
what lies beyond this city of ******?

Which do I take, where will it lead
to another slave town filled with prisoners of mead?

They've lost their mind of magic to refuge
but the meaning of life has yet to deluge.

Enter your shelter of safety with no fear
lacking in spirit which I hold to be dear.

A clone of the mix with nothing but tricks
you're easy to pick so quick to predict.

Small talking of lies to find common ties
repeating whats heard never dreaming with eyes.

Closed to your soul, the folly of old
wasting away for your fools gold.

Fearing the risk of patience and time
ignoring the climb to reach the sublime.

When will I see, how will I know
will I ever let go for my ego to grow?

The Circle of the Mushroom Ring:
Apocalyptic Sanctification

Feasting I wonder when the crumble will begin?
Alas we wait with our circle like friend.
Darkness entwined the vines where I sit
This shall be a night we gnomes won't forget.

History, mystery they all fall down
The human like creatures know nothing in town
for when we feast from this beautiful ring
all us gnomes will dance and sing.

Singing of terror in shadows they fall
creeping through forests watching them all.
I feel the time it grows too near
my senses feel nothing but their unwelcome fear.
Burn...

Fire to fire and dust to dust
Burn the village with pleasant disgust
Reap what you sow and scream what you plead
Ashes they fall, ashes they bleed.

Our minds are tuned with the ring of fate
We are the gods we create.
A mindless journey to tame the souls
to fill our empty heart-seeking holes.

Chanting and dancing we cheer through the streets
the wind of fire such a beautiful beat.
The cries of the children echo in flame
as I mock there howls with laughter of pain.

Steady I walk designing it all
Flooded by voices of the gnomes violent call.
Releasing the rage, spear-stick in my hand
right through the head, bold where I stand.

The village simmers but we do not
Tearing apart what we feel should rot.
The ground is no place for the blood of men
ashes to ashes amen to amend
The cravings wont stop, or my eyes will bleed.
for the fate of mankind is the mushroom ring.

-Do not forgive us for we have not sinned
We bless mother earth through our beautiful wind.-