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Druzzayne Rika Aug 2020
somehow
I was a mystery
   To you

But I was a broken piece
   A tired soul
     feeling unease

I closed doors
  windows
built fences around my home

all I wanted was control
  Of the car
   My life was driving

and wasn't it nice
      every other sunsets
   a shadow beneath the surface
we collided

a disruption
    my routine gone
anticipation
   and back to drama

It was uncontrollable
  the fifth gear
    I am scared

The wind flying my hair
    car radio, top volume
it was going too fast

   It was beyond
me, my white fences disappeared
and my living room couch is occupied
        Why cannot I stop this mess

Soon it will be too late
   A repeat of fate
       Or maybe this is not a mistake
?
Druzzayne Rika Nov 2020
Here goes the story,
a parallel sitting along
it is just identical
there we go,
witness it happen
but it is just so action
in different retrospection
with varying intention
all I think about is
this in recursion
If I could just
change the friction
what could it have been
there is no comparison.
Druzzayne Rika Nov 2023
In a realm of casual vibes and youthful trends,
A luncheon beckons, a gathering of friends.
Across the digital void, connections extend,
To an island retreat, where spirits transcend.
Druzzayne Rika Mar 2017
I smile
     when I do not know what to say
I smile
     when I do not know what is happening
I smile
     when I am expected to do so
I smile
     when I do know that I am in trouble
I smile
     when I do not want to lie
I smile
     *because it is better way to deal than to cry
Druzzayne Rika Oct 2023
Arrangements are so peculiar
    A chance and what turns out
quite spectacular.
However,                    
    One does wonder
in no particular order
              the momentum with which
the matter got piqued
it is a sensation worldwide.
Druzzayne Rika Jun 2022
My brain is cracked
the tension lines are dark
My habits untracked
Suppressed and lifeless
The chest is silent
heartbeat faint
The loss of control
and I can't control myself at all
the cure is for those who wants to be cured
the disease makes it
harder to think
it is just so hard, I keep blinking.
Druzzayne Rika Jul 2023
I'm better this way
Feeling low
I'm happy to feel sadness grow
Make my heart, a home.
Druzzayne Rika Aug 2020
The yearning is unending
It is just starting
all day waiting
The corner I occupy
I sit, with dying patience
yearning with experience
it seems you have forgotten my existence
with growing distance,
Why my yearning still grows,
It should have died till now

I am still in waiting room
sitting, with constant reminder
I am waiting for the flightless dream
a sightless vision,
A weightless endeavour,
The yearning goes up and down
with every sound in my ear.

Implications
Decisive,
I am jumbled being
Dying with constant yearning
Living in the past
Fighting for my future
With no end of this thirst.
I want to excel
but my thoughts expel
We both repel
But we are stuck here in a jell-o.
Druzzayne Rika Mar 2017
I have some junk inside my brain
I want to throw them away in the drain
But they somehow come up again
And make me feel vain
I am helpless because I have no restrain
It makes me feel that I might go insane
I'd rather prefer being mundane
Druzzayne Rika Jul 2017
You and I
an easiest lie
we shouldn't even try
nothing to justify

we may lie
but cannot deny
we are the one , never to unify
Druzzayne Rika Mar 2018
Just for show
it was just it,
nothing more.
clear skies,
while clouded eyes
and more spoken lies.

Just for show
yet again,
blame on me
what am I to be?
I cannot be free,
I still care.

Just for show
lets pretend
cry inside,
smile outside,
picture perfect
with no defect.

Just a little more left to show
and then I will go
                         away
.
Druzzayne Rika Oct 2023
When you hit, be ready for a quick push
What you throw it up, it falls down on you,
It's basic karma, one-oh-one
Be nice, be good, will bring a good turn
it all comes down to your intent in the end.
Druzzayne Rika Feb 2018
I am feasting on this Karmic food
Because there is nothing else I'm served
What gets life's lemons and spice
Even when you've lately been nice

We are blind to our sins which we've rightly done
We only know how to visibly see others' knives and guns

Have you ever felt good about yourself
Without having harassed anyone.
If not, eat it what you've been given
Karma knows better than everyone.
Druzzayne Rika Jan 2018
This place knows me
even better than I know who is me,
From my best moments
to the one that had gone far worse
It has seen it all
I never needed to tell

While I care about it
this place brings along its chill
All windows open
crowded ever by everyone
the feeling all spills
all are so free here to the feels.

Druzzayne Rika Oct 2018
I'll **** my own pride
to go on this fairytale ride
to become a distressed damsel
to live a life stable

There are no fancy knights alive
no one teaches them what's right
we'll be waiting half our life
then proceed ahead on our right

Little late on this race
there is not enough space
running knowing no better
getting a place whenever

The world not shy to show the unfairness
same status, more the less
crowning someone else the royal prince
it has this same ending long since.
Druzzayne Rika Apr 2017
Late hour ,
Underneath many stars ,
She drove her car
out of the city

The buzz
and the rush
turn'd her fuzz'd
that she could take no more

She was passing tiny towns
singing loudly old songs
on the road empty
driving fast ,far away .

Left the town without a phone
just useful and important possession
To be all alone on her own
To be free from all her boundaries

She had no map in hand
but she will not halt the car till dawn
something that will feel like home
A place of rest and calm .
Druzzayne Rika Sep 2023
It's getting late
late hours and I still don't close my eyes
I still wait for the chat to die
it keeps coming, back and forth
It's morning five
the sleepless night
An hour for day to break
My eyes remain awake.
Druzzayne Rika Feb 2019
Too late to contemplate
if it is too late now.
Druzzayne Rika Apr 2017
A kid left alone
To his own device
Family left for holidays
but at home,he has fun
And gets into mischief
Makes best of his time
But comes under the eyes
Of the bad guys
And near Christmas Eve
He fights them away
in ingenious ways
Druzzayne Rika Apr 2018
We do not own the earth
     no one does
          it gives shelter to many lives
              lets the mother nature rule the way.

The consequence of humans breaking the rule
countless times
the balance is disrupted
It is killing the earth slowly
affecting flora and fauna.

Humans may try to find another planet to disrupt
try to pollute other spaces with their selfishness
Taking advantage of Earth's kindness,
leaving behind the unrecyclable waste
The disaster is set to come
And the destruction will be worse.

Save the Earth now
let the life grow.
Druzzayne Rika Mar 2022
My heart beat rushed over
It was a series of long hover
I've been looking for
glancing back my shoulder
complicated, insecure
I am being let out
always left out
but a whisper
my name from your mouth
I rush, veins rush, cheeks blush
I touch my heart beat
how do you speak
Why do I go weak
in my knees.

Oh, in the night
your message, my phone screen
flashed all in my dreams too
Slept late, woke up early
to find you not there
It was 10:30, let's connect
but the time went
You didn't show your face
It became the same race
didn't justify you are late
I am done but why I am not
The same can and will
Come to repeat
You hold my keys
I am doomed as it states.

Your promises lay forgotten
pile inside a locked drawer
You'd never remember
they exist
I am half gone from existence
but you still have
strings to make me dance
to your tunes
It is crazy, I am crazy
while you don't try, lazy
I'd die in a heartbeat
but you wouldn't even acknowledge
that I exist,
the moon sets, I wish I can rest
Another time, let's not meet ever.
Druzzayne Rika Oct 2020
We are a community,
We are more
We think in poetry
every view is a scenery.

Lately, it is seen
the poetries remain largely unseen
I am not too keen
but sometimes it turns disheartening.

Forgotten scribbles of me and you
nothing zings through
it will slowly die without all the love
we need to see that eyes see.

Not just a number, it is more
It is rather significant than the score
The breathing beyond the screen
it is the question do I fit in.

It is a pleasure to read every day new
but the contents just go skew
how did it go out of hand
I am so invested with the time that I spend.

Let's give love ahead,
for every word rhymed
This place is flourishing with talents
let us not lose them.
Druzzayne Rika Dec 2022
I am still unable to understand
what am I,
Intolerant or a person tolerant for way too long?

The things I can't bare to watch,
they happened all at once,
but not really so sudden,
A product of our collective silence.

It started in our home,
we ignored all the warnings,
we made the decisions then
And we are at a situation now,
How do I blame someone else when
My hands are with light red stains too

Its fine, you know, time works, fast and slow
But yet I still cannot bare to look anyone in the eye.

Cold winds follow, the shadow grow dark,
The night dreams end, I still can't wake
The ignorance is no longer your friend,
When misery locks your hand.
One day I'll learn, it all comes clear,
What purpose did my actions bear?
Was it trivial, a fleeting trace?
The worries that clouded my mental space?

Perhaps it all connected unseen,
A beautiful pattern, a vibrant sheen.
Destiny's a game, the path unclear,
But like leaves changing hues, the answer will appear.

Hold your horses, calm your soul's rage,
There's mercy in time, wisdom on each page.
Level up your perspective, find a new sight,
Embrace the journey, bathed in golden light.
Druzzayne Rika May 2022
There is no truth out
when both of them have said
fair share of lies,
who should you believe between them
they both are using you
for rising sympathy
and their greater good
your emotions are played with
it is an acting game
trust them when, and not
we are spectating it
like a tennis match,
but we are the ball,
landing on their bat
thrown across again and again
you are doomed
finding bits of truth in their lies
either way, no one can complain,
it is no easy call.
Druzzayne Rika Aug 2018
What day it is
what place is this
Answer is there
I can see
but cannot see
the book is open
unreadable

the seamless
more I know less
up to the point
I know what I want
till nothing to
wait for
the sour feeling
keeps coming

driving slow
not missing sun's glow
it is bright
like always
beating on its own
the little heart
from its start

many branches
of the root
all stretches
out
to find a better place
participating in
every race

further apart
from where I had started
no closer to the end
it is no better than
if I just stop
midstep

it is not money
not for this journey
all I do
is do it more
candle is melting
all the wax
how can I reform
myself

The structure
all that matters
is that it stands
no fall, no toll
it is not as simple
to make the life boat sail
Druzzayne Rika Nov 2020
In a moment of time
I want to experience best of life
and the next moment,
the mystery of death
and how It progresses
The circle of birth
the story of first breath till last

Till it circles back to me.
Druzzayne Rika Aug 2023
Butchered, it was a life,
Cut up, it was breathing,
It was a living being,
Being in this world,
With you and me.

Destined to die,
aren't we all?

Would you **** me too,
Cook me up good?
Druzzayne Rika Aug 2023
I don't have sympathies
I feel fine if you fall
I trust that in time you will march back
Throw the dust off
And get back
In the life race
It is a place
Where no one is leading
And every track is dirt filled.
Druzzayne Rika Nov 2023
I want to be favoured
Favoured little bird
I want your attention
to be reserved
Solely on me.
Druzzayne Rika Nov 2023
You live, I live,
Not for anyone else.

We breathe air
Not borrowed from anyone.

not debtors or creditors,
we are free to live as we feel.

We were destined to come
learn the lessons
Because we are the blessed ones,
Seeing the changes come
Be loved by none
We come and go alone.

Our time here is a short span
our lifeline is much bigger than the deadline.
Let's remove the unresolved dependency of others,
There is no reason to carry the burden
And make the shoulders numb.

It's time we stop searching for higher purpose
And live in the moment here and now
deal with problems as they come.
Druzzayne Rika Apr 2018
Death comes alive                                
               when someone is going to die      
to take them away from life.
Druzzayne Rika Sep 2020
I have never given anyone peace
Why was I born to be such a disease.
Druzzayne Rika Dec 2018
Another lifetime comes to an end
Sleeping rhymes of beautiful hymns
Capture the essence of it all
And in the night slowly does it crawl
No inch into misery
No greed and no jealousy
The spirit devoid of it
Shining through the darkness
Brightening the passage
Wielding the magic
Little surreal not dramatic
A pinch of past and hope to future.
Druzzayne Rika Oct 2023
It's lonely times when I drink tea alone
It is an uneventful evening
I am caught up in worry clouds
Floating over my cup
Druzzayne Rika Apr 2017
On the barren lands
One lonely rose standing
just about to die
Druzzayne Rika Aug 2020
It is much suited, isn't it
the separation
it brings its own melody
the only thing
Everyone who listens
feel the same
It is the same longing
we all feel
all the same for all the difference
deserted in middle
met again in the same boat as travellers
finding place to soothe the thirst
rhythm of the same beat
echoing in the same heartbeat.
Druzzayne Rika Aug 2018
Can't it just
not this harsh
not mush, but
not this hard
why this rush
can't it must
stop the gush
like but not
when it rusts
no more trust
ends to gust
it just got
lost again, tough.
I used to be a kind soul
Now I am an eyesore
I used to be pink rose
fresh with lightness
Now I spread the dimness
Entrapped in darkness
Sharpening my thorns.
Druzzayne Rika Oct 2023
The radius of my love for you,
Like autumn leaves in hues so true,
Spreads wide and far, from heart to mind,
A malady of sweetest kind.

A cure I seek, but none is found,
My love for you knows no bound.
My heart beats fast, my breath grows deep,
When I am near, my love, I weep.

Oh, calm me down with some sedative,
Lest I become love's captive.
For thoughts of you consume my mind,
And leave no other thought behind.

But though my love may drive me mad,
I'd have it not, I'd not be glad,
To lose the feeling, sweet and pure,
That makes my heart for you endure.

So let me be, my love, my dear,
And let my love for you appear,
In every word and every deed,
A love that's sown and never freed
Druzzayne Rika Oct 2023
My love for you is like a flame,
It burns so bright, it's hard to tame,
Glowing maroon, burning sapphire,
So let's ignite a passion fire,
Chase through all the desire
It's clear, if the colour remains, when the yearning fades
But even so the true love remains.
Druzzayne Rika Aug 2020
The mask you see me wear
The mask I put on
They are different
I am protecting both
You and me
.
Druzzayne Rika May 2018
Sometimes,
meaningless things are more meaningful in life.
and some meaningful things don't hold much meaning for you.
Druzzayne Rika Dec 2020
unremarkable,
what a way to pass days
I have made no marks
to remember me by
And at nights, as I lie awake
I dream about how different
it could have been
if only if I was seen
with twinkles and gleam
but as the snow gathered
I slipped away
in the warmth I've known
in the bed I've grown,
I lie awake still
It is long night ahead
a merry christmas to you.
Druzzayne Rika Jul 2018
Still inside the prison
which doesn't exist
stuck in this place
which has no exit.

confined to me
no one is visiting me
there is no skies above
no different scenery.

I look for ways to escape
but I keep getting myself
more entangled
my sentence is getting larger.
Druzzayne Rika Mar 2019
I always have a feeling I don't fit
I am not an expert in social niceties
All my conversation comes out too forced
And all my reaction little too slow

I like the corner of the room
a place where no eyes will zoom
an invisible entity
with a hint of superiority

I am entitled to my thoughts
but not of anything else
I am so conceited self
when not kept in check

I am unique
no mirror yet found
so is everyone special
a no good excuse, please

I crib and cry
I live and lie
I have growing feeling of
abandonment
I want and I cannot

This continues for long
I really do not belong
the chances are that
there are no chances
I just want to skip it
altogether
Druzzayne Rika Jul 2023
My need for having a need for me
Is it my ego, or just vanity
I want just a single person to feel
My absence, fondness
To reassure me of my self-worth
I'd like to be in touch with the reality
Druzzayne Rika Oct 2023
Your truth is different from my own,
You see me differently than I'm known.
I plead on bended knee,
Please listen, please see.

My words have caused you pain,
I imagined our talk in vain.
I didn't give you space,
To decide your own pace.

Misunderstanding, a cruel twist,
A bridge we must now cross and mend.
I'll try to see you through your eyes,
I'm extremely apologetic, she denies.
Druzzayne Rika Jan 2023
It's a hell,
Even when there are mountains,
scenic rivers, with sun shining,
Shimmering landscape,
and a burning village,
Because in the city nearby,
Monsters are breathing,
With their hands on guns,
They feel at ease in killing,
The land of their ancestors,
Ruled by these monsters,
It's a hell,
for innocent bystanders.
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