You are not the only one that's broken
Do you even realize how hurtful  those words where that was spoken
You voice is all I can hear
It keeps ringing in my ear
"Your an awful person"
Made my depression worsen
Do you realize what you've done
You didn't place in my hand the gun
You just gave me reason to pull the trigger
I wish your last words you would reconsider



Guess you don't care what your words cost
For it was only me that you lost

Alone again, on the same furrowed land
Knees trembling to much to stand
I find my feet firmly planted in quicksand

I'm sinking yet AGAIN
There is no need to pretend
My situation is to much to comprehend

I'm tired of all the abuse
Forced into being a lonely recluse
I once again raise my flag of truce

This suffering is way to much to bear
So I let go, raise my hands into the air
To an uncaring entity, I offer my last prayer

I hear the last toll of the bell
As the tears in my eyes swell
Sinking into my own personal hell

I watch my life slowly dissipate
I listen to the last beat beneath my breastplate
I could no longer carry the weight

Sorrowed ink fills my pen
So I write once again
I'm not seeking fame
Just trying to drain the pain
No one need to read
I use my pen to bleed

I write about my past
It'll leave you aghast
When want and reality collide
I write about dreams that died
When I become numb
My brain becomes dumb
I write about how I've succumb
To a life lived in the rabbit hole
Where no happiness ever flowed
I write about agony
That drives you to your knees

Yes in my pen is the most sorrowed ink
Watch me as I sink
As I paint a picture of a person on the brink

I'm just here moving about
I haven't a destination, I haven't a route

I'm but the living dead
My eyes see only red
My soul's been chained
My emotion's drained
My heart is missing
My life is a cobra hissing

Scattered, nothing left of me
I'm a wondering gypsy
Nothing around me to see
For I've gone blind
My soul is in circled by a chalk outline
There is nothing left of me to find

My thoughts they are provoking
The darkness that is encroaching

I thought I was kind
  That's not what other's find
I thought I was sweet
   But all they wanted was my treat
I thought I was smart
    Looks as though I've been caught
I thought I was truthful
    But others say I'm just spiteful
I thought I was beautiful
   Guy's say I'm bearly doable
I thought I was noble
    Sadly I find I'm only woeful
I thought I could stand
    I'm flat on my belly in the sand
I thought I could be loved
    That thought can be scrubbed
Every thought I've had is wrong
     No ******* need to go on

To be held by someone that knows all my corners

The curtain comes down tonight
To put to bed this sorrowful sight
This play of horrific frights
Had to end, it's only right
For the writer had nothing left to write

Close to death
A finale breath
Reaper's touch
A finale hush
Pain dissipates
In loved one's eyes reinstates

Don't look, don't see, or you'll find
This river of tears is mine
I've been swept away in this torrential flood
Forever buried in a wall of mud
Of personal tragedy, anguish, and woe
Naked and shivering as the north wind blows
My very being had been laid bare
I lay in my bed of anguish and despair
Knowing I haven't a prayer
Living a life in disrepair

A broken soul
Never knowing which way to go
Constantly being cut to the bone
With edges honed
Cutting up a life force
That went so horribly off course

No one can love the shattered
Their broken pieces are to tattered
Get to close they **** and splatter
No place to step they are to scattered

One that lives a life in shards
Will never, ever put down thier guard
So they live a life alone
Love ever fleeting, or never known

Sadly only love can heal, it's what their needing
As they sit there hollowed eyed and bleeding

I'm sorry if you don't agree
I'm sorry if my words don't please
But take a closer look, you'll see
I write for me

I've felt it coming on for days
That ******* Dog is on his way
Nothing I did made his course sway

Why can't he just slumber
But deep in his throat I heard that rumble
I know I'm going to take a tumble

On the sharp rocks of life I'll be dashed
A bone crunching crash
It'll be fast

He pounced on he this morning
Now I'm in mourning
I seen him coming I had warning

In his big strong jaws he'll rip me apart
He'll devour my soul, my heart
That will only be a start

As he guards my hole
Not letting me go
My agony grows

Little girl lost
Always paying the cost
Look where she was tossed

Silently screaming in your ear

You carry with you a blackened sky
Not everyone can see it, but it's in your eyes
It's in the very heart of your being
I hear the sorrowful song your singing
You hide it well
Your personal hell
But I have my own, I can tell
I can feel your pain's tide ebb and swell
It threatens to pull you under
I too hear that thunder
We are creatures connected by darkness
The beast of Hell have marked us
You try to hide this from the world
As your life spirals and whirls
It's exhausting, I know for a fact
For everday your taken aback
Living life under that blackened sky
You can hide it, except from your eyes

Death is down the street
Wonder if we'll meet

Death is in my yard
Looking very hard

Death is at my window
Feel like I'm in limbo

Death is at my door
Checking the score

Death is in my room
I can smell his perfume

Death took my hand
Swept me off to his glorious land

She whispers to me in the dead of night
I scream for her in the bright daylight
She's my sweetest siren, she sings  a fatal song
Such a rush, falling headlong
In her embrace nothing can go wrong
With her venom, I feel I belong

With a single fang
She spikes my vein
A sudden rush
The quiet hush
A body sigh
Touching the sky
Nodding out
No voice to shout
Wonderful phenomenon
Worries gone

She whispers to me in the dead of night
I scream for her in the morning light
Responsibility she slays
Chases memories away
My beautiful queen
Erases what I've seen
I have succumbed
I have become
In every way
Her prey

The walking dead in the land of the living
Soulless eyes and hearts unforgiving
They seek to destroy
******* out your joy
Shatter your skull
Make your mind dull
Rip out your heart
That's just the start
Dead set eyes
You'll never relize
Till it's to late
Your heart they ate
Breathing remains
Nothing else the same
Now hollow of feeling
Soul was sent reeling
Some don't know
Out of them life flowed
We're all missing parts
Mostly the heart
Also gray matter
Out of mouths spatter
Growing in number
Pillage and plunder
All must be feed
Living in the land of the dead..

Love is free
Love is what happened to be
Love is so beautifully portrayed
Love is one more day
Love is what I seek
Love is so meek

Love is a propaganda
Love is the last stanza
Love is one extremely cold rain
Love is what happened to bring pain
Love is the bitter end
Love is what never did begin

Living a life full of shadows, full of echoes
Voices from my past bellows
In my head and in my heart
They seem to want to tear me apart
To make me pay a price I don't owe
The devil put a price on my soul
He's tried to crush me
Rush me
Brush me aside
Make me hide
God's angels join in
Chasing away any friend

I'm not ment for heaven or hell
I just ride the growing swell
Until I'm dropped into the hole
Where all the unwanted souls go
The black abyss will be a welcome sight
No longer having to put up a fight
There in the darkness I'll dwell in delight
Far from hell's dogs
Or those heavenly hogs

I promise to mislead, deceive, and begial
You can continue to live your life in denial
Pretending everything's great
As your lies you spin and create

I'm the one that comforts you in the dead of night
Not your so called friends that are so up tight

I calm your nerves
I'm what you deserve
I chase the memories away
I make everything seem ok

But somedays I make them stay
I make everything in disarray
You know on those days you just need more of me
On your back I'll always be
With the darkness always closing in, always there
I'll by the only one who truly cares
You are my favorite ******

Sincerely
Your Loving Monkey

I woke today
In the usual way
Alarms blaring
Clock uncaring
Sleep fleeting
Sun greeting
Eye's blinking
Minutes ticking

Yes everything was the same, the normal routine
But I could feel that cold clutch of something unseen
Today might be different plight
There's something not quite right
Apprehension over me rolled
Something in the wind had gone cold
It's making my soul shiver
Like being submerge in a cold river

Thoughts thickening
Clock ticking
Eyes darting
Fear starting
Breath catching
Life injecting
Uncertainty
I woke today
In the usual way
To find a day
In decay

The only sound in my ears is the crashing of waves
I exhale, trying to be brave
But I can't stop the scalding tears
I'm waiting for my vision to clear
Kneeling by your newly dug grave
I feel that to this place I am now enslaved
I can only muster a hushed whisper
"How could you leave me dear sister"

I'm tired of feeling this way
No matter what the day
Tired of feeling disjointed, disfigured
With my missing parts scattered on the ground
Knowing not all the parts are there to be found
I am only deconstructed, not reconstructed
I can never again be whole
I'll never be myself of old
Someone tell me why I should go on
Only a piece of a person, most of me gone
I just want to lay the rest of me down, how can that be wrong

Sitting on the soft floor surrounded by white
Hugging your self wither you want to or not
The light is so very, very bright
In your head your screaming stop

Because they're buzzing so loud
And it's the only **** sound
But the voices in your head are starting to crowd
In your brain they are circling and twirling around

How did I end up here
I don't remeber a thing
There is nothing at all that is clear
Did I finally snap, that one final little string

Oh those ******* lights won't they stop
My voices yell in unison, it's causing them pain
That buzzing is gonna make me blow my top
If it don't stop, the buzzing will dive them insane

And if they go nutty what will happen to me
**** it's been hours, or has it been minutes
I'm not sure, seconds it might be
I'm being pushed past my limits

Still, tho I can't see a clock
I can feel time ticking by
Or maybe it's not
I would know if I could see the sky

But that is impossible so I just rock and I sway
The buzzing has now become my back beat
I know it's been years now, or maybe just days
I can't tell this room is dripping with deceit

I know when they open that door
Drowned in my own drool
Right there on the floor
Just another crazy fool

Remember even things heaven sent
Are a little bent

Lips so red
Looks like they've bleed
For the lies you've spread

Eyes so blue
They're soulless too
Your blackness grew

Your arms entrap
Ensnare, react
I'm imprisoned, snapped

Your heart is hollow
In evil you waller
You make me scream and holler

Out of control
Out for my soul
My heart you stole

In my dream the other night
Meteors where in flight
They streaked across my midnight sky
Like fireworks on the 4th of July
Forever screaming through space
Far above this sad human race
As I watched such beauty rain through the heavens
The nightingale's song did beckon

It brought my attention back to the ground
Horrified by what I found
Hairless apes that swung down from the trees
Are now on bended knees
I heard them praying to their Gods
They seemed to be at odds
I seen them on their bellies crawl
Look up to the sky in awe
For they feared his wrath
They feared his laugh
Praying to an unseen entity
When mother nature held the remedy

I turn my attention back to the star sprinkled sky
But even there thing's where starting to go awry
The sky was falling into the deepest darkest hole
A hole so greedy it refused to even let the light go
The world started to spin
The hairless apes screamed it was because of the other man's sin
Refusing to see sin belongs to each of them
Instead they just chartered
About the depravity of one another, none of it matter

Colors no one had ever seen swirled by
It was the most pleasing journey to the eye  
As I rode the earth into the void
Streaking into the blackness like an asteroid
Relishing the thought human nature would soon be destroyed

But I fell like a stone
Waking up in my bed alone
T.V. showing the morning news
Terrorist plotting against the Jews
Everyone hating on one another
Their religion is their cover, trying to use it to smother
Them apes are to blind to see
That thier imaginary entity
Is the original sin
Another reason for men to hate men

Out in the woods I took a stroll
But the trial was getting mighty droll
So off into the thicket I dared go

The further I went the thicker it got
But I was determined to find what I sought
I was so tired of these overwhelming thoughts

The trorns stretched out and cut thin lines
My hands got entangled within the vines
This seems to be a constant thyme of mine

But I pushed on, pushed through Even though the pain grew
Had I bitten off more than I could chew

The brambles I was currently entangled in
Went on, and on much to my chagrin
I couldn't even tell where I had been

I sat right down there amongst the thorns
Why did I never listen to that voice that warns
But I never did, I always meet the bull by the horns

About to give up, about to coincide
But what happened next was hard to believe
A crimson red bird flew down and sat by me

He started to sing of better days of better ways
He sang of greener pastures in which to graze
Even if on my hands and knees a trail I must blaze

"So don't give up" he screeched as he flew
"Your trials will be a lot more than a few"
"But pushing on I know you can do"

So that I did, on my hands and my knees
I knew perseverance held the keys
I would be as brave as my ancestors, the Cherokees

When I finally broke through, dog tired and ******
Body covered in the thorny cuts, face muddy
I looked like a severely beaten puppy

But as I looked down on the valley below
I let all of that go
I was now within nature's wonderful flow

The smell of honeysuckle and lilacs did mingle
A scent so delectable it made my senses tingle
The dew on the vibrant green grass, like diamonds did twinkle

I'm so glad even though sorrow overflowed my cup
That I didn't give in to all of this world's snubs
I pushed on and didn't give up

Life is an oxymoron, on that you can depend
For now that I'm at the end
My life can truly begin

Stop
Drop
And roll
This ***** is on fire, she's out of controll
Don't try to follow, you'll get lost in the flow
Like a rollercoaster she'll take you to the top
A hesitant stop
As you prepare for the drop
Then the ultimate roll
As she drops you in the hole
Where only the darkness dares to go
What is her goal
Is it to steal your soul

Hell no
She just wants to show
What it's like
On the tip of the spike
What it is to live her life
She'll give you the rhythm
Of what she's been given
She'll give you the rhyme
Of a life out of time
She'll show you the holes
Within her soul
Where the monsters took and stole
What happens when only agony grows

Stop
Drop
And roll
It's the only way to go
When you've turned to stone
Because every cut is to the bone
In her mind only demons roam
Every night is a fright
Everyday is a fight
So hold on tight
It's a ride for your life

With my pen I try to slay the demons
I am determined to chase them from my eden
With the inky darkness I will paint my picture
I will paint them with such stricture
My words will flow
And everyone I'll show
They will no longer be allowed to reside
Hidden deep inside
With the darkness of my ink
I will bring them to the brink
With the black flow, I'll shine the light
On their hideous form, no longer hiding in the night

He grew up just him and his poor mother
No sweet sister, no rough and tumble brother
His Dad was M.I.A.
It happened in the usual way

But he didn't care
A cub never needs a father bear
His mother sufficed
Taught him wrong from right

He had it all figured out
He knew without a doubt
He had watched the rich kids laugh and joke
While in property he wallered and choked

So he studied hard and got good grades
In college he didn't party, never went to any raves
Got a corporate job, had a 3 figure income
He had money to pay bills, buy cars and then some

He took care of his mom till she passed away
He learned a great lessons on that rainy gray day
Money couldn't stop his mom from dying
Grown men where not above crying

The years quickly passed, he was married to his job
To those less fortunate he was a snob
On the streets he never gave the bums a secound look
If they had only took a page out of his book

He thought money was the way to happiness
Those he thought of as sad always had less
He had forgot about the lesson of the stone with it's dashes
Then the day came when the stock market crashes

He should of invested his time in a family
Instead of that money tree
For soon all his money was gone
Things in his life was going all wrong
His job disappeared, along with his home
Soon on the streets he had to roam

Now he was one of the despised
But on the streets he truly grew wise

Through hardship he found true friends
The ones that would help you to no end
For they know the pain of need
There was never any thought of greed

He was astonishingly amazed
That even with the poverty that he was grazed
He was happier now
Than chasing that cash cow

A good woman found him
His future then didn't look so grim
Years passed and they married
Over thier rundown apartment threshold, her he carried
Soon it was babies in his arms
He truly knew now his vision of life had been wrong

Now he knew
Where it was that happiness grew
In the hearts of ones you loved and cared for
Being rich or being poor was both a chore
It's all just clatter
Unless to someone else you matter

I never was warned
Now I'm stuck on the horns

I'm burning in the fire
Stuck in the mire

Each choice will pierce
This decision is fierce

This situation is dire
My brain is going haywire

It's about to expire
What an awful quagmire

The universe against me is conspiring
With all it guns locked and loaded, it's firing

It's aiming straight at my heart, my head
I swear it wants me dead

Such an enigma
On the horns of a dilemma

Come here please
I want to whisper all my pleas

I'm tired of screaming
Things that have no meaning

Falling on ears
That can not hear

Searching for the broken hearted
That so long ago departed

Come here please
Things are never as they seem

Fluffy white clouds, sailing in a sea of blue
I never knowing, no I hadn't a clue
This would be the last day I would be seeing you

Got off work, went to your home
Door was locked so around it I roam
Peeking in the windows, rapping on the glass
Please just answer me, I shout out and I ask

I seen you this morning in the dawns haze
You looked so stressed, stuck in your maze
I made you promise you'd get some sleep
I laughingly suggested counting sheep
You gave your sweetest fake grin
Gave me a hug, turned around and went in

I whispered I love you as I turned to leave
I heard you heave a heavy sigh of relief
You was in the abyss
Company you did not want or miss

You was head diving for the bottom
Your mood fit the skelton tree's of late autumn
Your emotions where laid bear
You trembled like those trees in the cold morning air
Everything you had cared about, you let fall away
Just like those tree's did, all around you at your feet they laid
Everything you once cared about was in a slow rotting decay

You never answered your door that I pounded on
You was already gone
You left everything, even your phone
You took off all alone

You left no note
No sign of hope
One minute you was here
Now your gone and I fear
I will never see you again
I fear your sorrowful life you put to an end

But I'll never know
Which direction you decided to go
I hope your out living your dreams
That this is not what it seems

Dear friend I love you so
I really need to know
So out in your woods I took a stroll
Down to your favorite spot where the creek flows

But I didn't find you there
Babe where are you, you know I care
Relieved your lifeless body I didn't find
Wishing you had left a sign
Not knowing what happened to you
Is leaving ME cold and blue

I'm standing on the ledge again
How did it all begin
I was minding my own business
But it struck with such quickness
Where did that razor come from
I'm afraid I might succumb
It was like magic it just appeared
The temptation to pick it up is something to be feared
Because if I do I'll slice from ear to ear.

My living corpse walked on
Walking in the perpetual dawn
Of all the things that have gone wrong
This is the wish that I will sound
I hope my body's never found
And I just melt back into the ground

This silence is brutally violent
The voices in my head went silent
My thoughts continue to race
They stir no emotion, just empty space
A pulverized heart keeps beating
The thumping in my chest keeps repeating
The wells in my eyes have ran dry
No more tears will be cried
Not a thing to keep me reeling
No emotion, no feelings
I'm afraid I've succumbed
Laying on a bed of thorns, feeling nothing but numb

Have you ever wondered
What it's like to live a life that's been plundered
Body and emotions *****
What kind of monstrous life it shaped

Let me tell you a story
I apologize now, it maybe a little gory
It's about a little girls life
How she was forced to walk on the edge of the knife

The sadness started at her birth
At this event there was no mirth
Before her a brother at 4 months had died
She was not born a boy so her mother cried
But she was the apple of her Dad's eye

So for the next 7 years
Her world was full of cheer
Except for her mother's geers

There was mud pies
Sunny sky's
Bicycle rides
Slip and slides
Camping trips
Potato chips
Fishing poles
Daddy's hand to hold
Big sisters kisses
Mother's suppers delicious

Then came the split
Her heart was ripped

A dad rarely seen
A mother that was mean
Then came the step dad, what he did was obscene

A mom never knowing
Around the girl the darkness was growing
The keys on his belt jingled down the hall
He was coming to call
Under the covers the girl of 8 cowered
For he held all the power

Step dad beat the girl's mom all the time
He threatened the child, "tell no one, I claim you as mine"
She told not a soul, not even her Dad
She was afraid step dad would hurt him bad
Besides a new family with a new baby boy her Dad had

So she suffered in silence till the age of 14
When thinking back on what her years had gleaned
For her dad had recently passed away
It made her heart cave
She made a trip to the cemetery laid down on his grave
Took a handful of sleeping pills, death she craved
To her disappointment around noon the next day she woke up
Trudged back home, knowing she would have to drink the wrath from her mother's cup

Fast forward a few years
There was still plenty of tears
The sins of a mother is like no other
On the little girl they covered and smothered
The little girl knowing only pain as love
The girl married a man that beat and shoved

After four kids of her own, 3 daughters and a son
She found the key to her rusty cage and made a run
She was bound and determined thier childhood would be full of fun

For man's wicked way she had been shown
So for 13 years her and her kids lived all alone
She tried her hardest to protect them from the monsters
Only family was let close enough to love and foster

She didn't realize her mother had married ANOTHER *******
The little girl's  SON'S soul was tossed into the fire
Though she questioned her children all the time, the results was the same
Her son suffered in silence and shame
Even though the little girl didn't know, she was mom and she was to blame
All of her love couldn't heal her sons pain

The years ticked by
She lived under the darkest of skies
Her son's anger grew
He's words created scars that where new
Along with the constant every two year visits of the abusive alcoholic she had once been chained to

That girl decided her kids where grown and with her life she was through
Swallowed two bottles of pills
Praying it would cure all her ills
She went behind the veil to the dark quite abyss
Her children would be all she missed
Much to her chagrin
Those doctors brought her back to life again

Fast forward just two more years
There would be new founded fears
That abusive alcoholic made another visit, dragged her to the woods
***** her in the worst way he could
He left her miles from nowhere, bruised and bartered
More holes in her soul, ripped and tattered

That was a year ago
The darkness from it all still grows
She struggles every day
As she tries to keep the demons and darkness at bay
For her thoughts heavily weigh
When she thinks back on her life in decay

Are you wondering what happened to that little girl lost
How she lives on still paying the cost

Well you see
That Little girl is me

I'm still all alone
In my bedroom at home
That is where I cry
Screaming at a non existing God why
Why, I was only given a few happy years
With agony the rest was filled
Not understanding why I was spit out of deaths mouth, just to be ***** again
Tell me God, at the age of 8 what was my sin
Why was I condemned
Never to see blue skies again

Start of the day
I'm already in the sway
Standing on the edge
Of my life's little ledge
Standing here debating
My life I'm rating
Should I stay and fight
Just for another agonizing night
Or should I take flight
Open up my arms, let the air rush by
As I fall into the sky
Yes it's just the morning
But my mind's already storming

On my knees but it hurts to pray
I wither in agony every ******* day
I must ask you to look the other way

I am the cautionary tale
I have stepped behind the veil
But even in death I was a fail

So eager for death
For secrets to be kept
Till that final last breath

I prayed for the pain to stop
I prayed for the demons not to romp
Through my life, on my dreams not to stomp

Seems that I've prayed to one that refuses to listen
There seems to be a rift, a division
For my life plays out in black and crimson

On my knees but it hurts to pray
I wither in agony every ******* day
I must ask you to look the other way

Sitting here watching you sleeping
Wondering if you know, it's my dreams that you're keeping
You are everything I want a man to be
Someone, in this world I thought I'd never see

Gentle but tough
Your touch never rough
Never rushed
My heart you build up, not crush
My scars you kiss
Not a one you miss
Even those on my soul
You try to sew

But your heart you gaurd
Someone broke it, made it hard
The words I love you will not pass your lips
The terror of those words grip

But babe you never have to say them to me
For you show it, I can plainly see
That love dances in your eyes
It escapes in your moaning sighs
As in my bed together we lay
So my darling, those words I'll never make you say
Because you show me your love everyday

Like a white bird in a blizzard
I'm invisible
In middle is where I'm delivered
Battling the freezing storms
No one notices, but that's the norm
The battles I wage are as silent
As the first feathery snows at night
This world is cold and cruel
There is no golden rule
One of these days when you finally look, I'll be found
Lying frozen to the ground

Laying here with my arm's across my chest
Just hugging myself
For there's no one here to hold me
Tears cascading, I can't see
No one here to comfort me
No one here to care
Only me to pick myself up, when
I fell
When I fall
When I hit the wall
No, no one here at all

With all this stress I'm starting to crack
You'll find me here like a turtle on my back
I can't get up, even though I try
But like that turtle I'll just stay here and die

Poor little fly
Fighting just to survive
No one saw it's demise but me
As he struggled not to freeze
First he flew in little hops
But to soon that stops
Then he walked in endless circles in the Sun's rays
But soon that too gave way
Now he lays frozen stiff
I wonder if me seeing made a diff
That this little flys last moments on earth
Didn't go unnoticed, and to a little poem had given birth

This poor little fly's fight
Is a lot like my own sad sight
Wonder if anyone sees my slow decent
How this life is leaving me bent
Wonder if when I finally freeze and die
Will anyone notice and wonder why
Or see how I fought to survive
Just like that little fly

Your soul's obscene
The worst I've seen
Your soul's to putrid
It's been polluted
Your soul's turned rancid
It's stagnant and placid

You are a travesty
An unforgivable tragedy
Stick that needle in your arm
Anything that harms
Pop those pills
You have no self will

Continue doing what you do
But you can count on this, I'm through
The smell of death surrounds you
Your choices are growing few
I'm tired of being on the wall, the fly
Just sitting here watching you die

Always in the demons jaws
Or in their claws
Here's the knife take a slice, take a bite
Start with innocence and all that's right
Next is the heart, cut it out
No need to shout
Bleed me dry
No need to cry
No need to try
**** the soul
Do it slow
Watch the blackness flow
Turn me into a monster
Where only anger and agony foster
The innocent little girl, I lost her

I wish I was a big fat brown furry squirrel
Up in the walnut trees I'd scamper and twirl
Collect my delicious nuts for the frigid winter time
Invite squirrl friends over to party and dine
Take sweltering summer days to run, jump and play
Frighten some silly song birds along the way
No worries of the coming days
No bill collectors at the door to pay
To just live wildly free
Like nature was ment to be
Live out my life in a comfy hole I made in that old walnut tree
That tree was here in my grandpa's days, it's as sturdy as can be
In the winter curl into a warm ball and try to remember
Of where I hid my stash of nuts,  come December
I want to be a big fat happy squirrel
Never angain a sad woman-girl

On the outside I'm hard as a rock
You can't even hear the thud when I drop

On the inside I'm a crying little *****
Like a kid whipped with a switch

On the outside no emotion at all
You can't even tell I'm in a fall

On the inside a quivering mass
Fearing the final die has been cast