In light of the mistakes we've made,
there is free knowledge gained.
From this point on nothing will remain the same.
We're at the brink of no return.
So what are we to do, lie around & wallow?

No way, because we aren't meant to follow.
Keeping our heads held high to the sky,
never looking back eyes always forward.
We've already witnessed what He did to ***** & Gomorrah.
Assuming you're one of the many who don't know the story behind these two.
I strongly suggest that you pick-up your nearest Bible.

Once the book is opened,
He has already implanted you with seed for daily survival.
Having nothing to do with which Bible version you choose to read.
Alluring poetry at it's best, one of God's greatest masterpiece.
A handy guide for the worldly lies they've sold to us since we've been born.
True satisfaction can't initiate through ***, drugs, money, or ****.
You'll always be yearning for more & more.

Being the Kings & Queens of our own lives is a doomed destiny from the start.
What will it take for you to swallow your pride & open your heart?
I fell out of love with the world & fallen irrevocably in love with the man above.
†
Will you join me on this bestowed journey for eternity that He calls Heaven?
Or will you refuse it, turning into everyone else neglecting His existence?
You choose, however just know you've already been chosen...

From the moment I walked in,
I felt the piercing eyes.
Same eyes that nailed Jesus to the wooden cross.

Jesus said, by this,
all man will know you are my disciples,
if you have love one to another.

Pharisees, Pharisees, Pharisees.

Oh, how the mighty have fallen into apostasy.
Like the Nephilim which came & has yet to come again.  
Surely heading back to the beginning, the Days of Noah.

The entire time I sat in those fold-up chairs,
my heart couldn't stop racing.
Perhaps it was the spirits aligning to seek whom they may devour.

Heard many vain repetitions today,
didn't Jesus say that's what heathens do?
For they think that they will be heard for their many words.

We all crucified the Lord Jesus Christ.
We have all blasphemed.

One perfect Godman died on our behalf,
then rose 3 days later to break the curse.
Sacrificial love.

Let us not break bread & drink grape juice.
Guess you never knew that's symbology for cannibalism.
In which He never commanded us to do.

Simply two commands were left.
Love God with all your heart,
with all your soul & with all your mind.
Secondly, love your neighbor as you love yourself.

How did it start you might ask?
  The story began when I was 16.

  She knew just how to manipulate
me & so did Tim.
This was also the age I lost my
virginity to him.

Lured toward the lust I felt inside.
Which was why I had so much PRIDE.
She dated me & some other guy.
All along I was just her backup plan.

Keep in mind, I was a 10th grader in High School.
Going out to parties, smoking a bunch of cigarettes & ****.
Nothing mattered. Which left me feeling more alone than I ever did.
Didn't get the privilege to walk down the aisle with the rest of my classmates.

Expelled.

How can God forgive a misfit such as me?
How undeserving I was. Rebellion.

Plenty of drugs & clubs - my personal
favorite was Pulse Night Club.
Who was I when I wasn't with women?

This was my life for 10 years.

Later on, I watched a spoken word video
called Jesus > Religion.
For a moment it clicked, or so I thought.
Evidently realizing I was a religious fraud.

Once upon a time, I was among the dead.
Now I am fully alive in Yeshua.
I may never forget, even if He already has.
As far as the East is from the West.

  Relentlessly pursuing me in my brokenness.
He has made me whole & new again.

I urge you to pick-up your cross.
The battle has already been won.

Addiction what a cruel thing.
To be entangled by the fiery flames of hell.
Oh, how short have we fallen?

I have seen many tumble into the same abyss myself included.
Deep dark pit of despair.
Always making you need to gasp for more air.

Every family has a Judas.

Or one family member may have an addiction, to later pass it on to their siblings.

All my life I have been a doer rather than a hearer.
The Lord is our Shepherd only if I let Him Shepherd me.
As He leads me to the boldness of His merciful love.


Once upon a time, I was at enmity with God.

Carnel mind & all.

Previously owned by the devil now I am a child of the Most High.


Do you know the Shepherd?

When I first moved to Seattle at age 21,

I had a vision.

My reasoning to recreate myself.

A longing to be an independent woman,

far away from my Father.

Thought I would change into this "glorious" being.

Ironically enough, I didn't change,

in fact, I became even worse off.



Didn't love anyone but me,

barely had much leftover for my family.

10 years later,

I am sitting here writing a story of 10 years wasted & drugged.

No solace just plenty of malice.



Found tons of photos in Dropbox tonight.

Stayed up all night so I could delete over 1,000.

By the time morning came,

the pictures left me depleted.

Along with people I've slept with & people I've met along the way.



Does this sound familiar to you?

Can you relate?

How many hearts I've broken,

now I include mine.

Even displayed the third eye in most of the photos.

Can't say I've reached the state of enlightenment.

There wasn't a time when I didn't have a drink or smoke on hand.



A plethora of vanity,

with no sanity sight.

I've pressed delete many times,

and still,

they'll always be stamped pressed in my mind.

Long lost memories.

Now please,

ask yourself how deep have you or will you continue to bury it?

This proved to myself how much I loathe who I used to be.



Externally I may have look happy & healthy.

Internally I was dying from all the mischief.

I believe it started at the age of 12 when I lost my Mother.

With no compassion for others.



WAKE UP!

Ladies & gentlemen,

time flies,

don't let Snapchat lie to you.

You aren't getting any younger,

you could just be getting uglier.

Take it from me,

there is no freedom in social media.

Just more demons,

when we really need more of Jesus.

"Things don't need to last forever to be perfect." - Daydream Nation

Can you recall when your innocence was lost?
Maybe it had to do with all the alcohol you've drunk?
Without knowing how to cope, resulting in night terrors.
Impenetrable, irreplaceable, imcombustable, irrevocable memories.

Trying to relive, revive past memories, experiences, pictures, and videos framed for all to see.
Memories etched into our brains like an etch-a-sketch board.

Do you remember the innocence you had as a child?
Whether coming home to a pre-cooked meal or riding your bike around aimlessly.

Storing memories in the attics of the mind.
A dark & dusty room filled with cobwebs,
Perhaps you'll find those packs of cigarettes you lost.

Similar to the stories in books or movies on Netflix.
Trapped between delusion & fictional fantasy.

We are the retrospective light - angelic humans.

Where do you run when your loneliness strikes?

It's just about midnight, while you stroll downtown glaring at the lights.

All over creation, I see the lust of the world,
while pride tries to draw me in.

Can't you see what PornHub has done?

As I sat in front of the garden of Eden,
I watched others stand in line waiting for their fruit.

Oh, how deceived I was.
Being ****** made the loneliness worse I was numb to it.
We're all lost,
overly using the wrong Messiah such an Urban Legend.

These apples had my heart but never caused me to Have A Heart.
I certainly almost surely died,
from the tree of knowledge of good and evil.

Admit it, we are all lonely.

Beauty isn't everything folks.

Stop letting Estee Lauder, CoverGirl and Sephora define you.

Companies such as these try telling us what beauty is, but it's merely just another exterior pleasure.

Although, we're told differently, and we foolishly believe it wholeheartedly.


Okay, let's take it back for a moment, rewind.

When Adam & Eve were created,
not only were they shamed, they were naked.

"Who told you, you were naked,?" said the Creator.


Now, I ask you same question.

Who told you that you weren't beautiful?

Not to be caked up, overly concerning yourself with vanity.

Oh, look at me, aren't I pretty!


Everyday I see women trying to be everything they're not.

Hate to burst your bubble, but
feminism isn't the solution to the problem.

Face it ladies, you will never receive the attention you deserve, unless you give it yourself first.

I speak from experience.


This feministic agenda tells us we can be "the man."

This isn't true, there is nothing you need to compensate for.

We can be strong and feminine just like our mothers


I believe our Creator came in the flesh, to tell us our beauty is full. BEautiFULL.

Marvelous are HIS works, And that my soul knows very well
- Psalm 139:14

Hey, do you wanna smoke some dank ****?
Dope, let's get hella blazed then go to Taco Bell.  

PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT:

You don't need it despite what you say.
It needs you to feed it, or else it leaves you defeated.

Why do you think you get hungry afterwards?
Can you honestly say you don't want to save money?
Yeah, me too.
Right now the high is all I want.
Specifically to meet a basic human need, like going to sleep or eating.
Why? Is it addiction or habit? Maybe it's both.

A vicious cycle I was stuck in,
now with people all around me doing the exact same thing.
Insanity.

Our human tendency is to seek comfort in what we know;
rather than forming new habits.
Don't get it twisted, I'm not saying **** hasn't helped people.
The irony is once they have your IDentity you'll always want more.

The fact is legal means quick easy access, all you need is your ID.
There's many natural ways to be High, just take a walk outside.
It's called the Devil's Lettuce for a reason.

Now say it with me,
I am in control now, you don't have control over me anymore.

When waves crash against you, all you can do is lie still.
While currents keep pulling you further into the ocean.
You start to appear calm, given the distance from land.
Seconds after, you realize no one has taught you how to swim.

Sinking deeper and deeper in the blue abyss.
Sensing yourself physically drown as the water engulfs your lungs.
Pressure from the ocean begins to settle in.
Suddenly, a bright light starts shimmering through the ocean.
With every inch of strength left, I decided to start swimming towards the glistening light.
As the pressure subsides, I find myself floating above water again.

*Who said you can't teach yourself how to swim.

None of us are perfect by any means.
Why do we constantly fool ourselves trying to be?
You can hurt yourself trying to become someone that you're not.

Be proud enough to show your battle scars.
Be brave enough to wear your pain on your sleeves.
Become transparent with others, realize we all have struggles.

Whether it be with anxiety, depression or loneliness.
Believe me, you're not worthless.
Deep down, we're all too proud to admit we're a hot mess.
Poets can contest to this;
Since we stay up late, writing about everything we've suppressed.

Things are quite rocky in today's world wouldn't you say?
Hate is growing stronger, as a consequence love is waxing cold day by day.
Celebrities are securing riches while the rest of the world succumbs into sickness.

Everyday Americans are going into foreclosure, others can't obtain jobs to pay their monthly dues. There's even a battle on the news based on who has the right to use a particular bathroom. Simultaneously there's millions of homeless people starving and sleeping on the streets.

Meanwhile it's breaking news that Beyonce is having twins!
Still, we never hear CNN mention the pedophiles that were arrested in California. Which resulted in 450+ arrests and counting, the veil has been lifted if you have open eyes to look.


There, there you can go back to sleep now... Continue dreaming about Beyonce's twins.

Today is my Dad's 60th birthday.
Today I also lost my job due to discrimination.
I haven't been fired from a job since I was 18.
Now I'm 25 knowing this is merely a trial.
People are watching me wondering how I've taken the fall.
I'm not here for sympathy or applause.

I'm here to share with you, how you too can can rise against it all.
Like my Mother, I am a ferocious lion choosing to stand tall.
My identity isn't in my occupation, possessions or knowledge.
My identity is in Christ no matter the odds.
By serving a God who is greater than the world, there is no storm you can't weather.

This is for my generation.
  A generation full of selfies, in short for selfish.
  A generation of women murdering their own unborn babies.
Woman walk around half dressed hoping a man will grant them respect.
As they reclaim their lives, renaming it feminism at it's best.
This is for my generation.
A generation of men that rather play with their hands.
Rather than creating work out of their bare hands.
Lusting for women as if we were created for one night stands.
We are the millennials.* We're *full of worldly distractions.
Looking for our parents to be the lending tree.
Since we spend most of our money on ***** & ****.
This is for my generation.
Can't you see we're slowly dying off? We are becoming too self involved.
While every pleasure keeps causing our own demise.
We're too stubborn to realize our ways are flawed.
We mask it and look for love in other people. Yet, we feel emptier when the love isn't reciprocated. Some call this "unrequited love".
This is for my generation.
I'm here to tell you that, you are loved, you are cherished, and you can be forgiven. You can be saved, not by your works or how much money you make.
If you only believe what He did for you on the cross.
The perfect blood Atonement.
We are the Godless generation. Most would say they believe in evolution, perhaps others would mention God.
This is for my generation.
See, Jesus didn't come for the religious people. In fact, he called them frauds. He's more than just a bunch of rules and laws. In reality, He only came to save the lost. Which lead him to be hated, beaten and killed on a cross. 3 days later, He rose from the dead something Allah never did.
Now that our King is risen, He's offering a free gift of salvation. That's why it's called Grace. Being coming Christian doesn't make you perfect, don't get it twisted. I'm just a forgiven sinner by His definition.

**The choice is yours.

As we get closer to inauguration day for President selected Donald Trump, I've got a few things I'd like to mention.

I say this in no offense to Trump voters, I say this in no offense to Hillary voters. No matter which political party you voted for; I wrote this for the reason that somebody has to.

On the night of November 9th, while the masses followed their leader. I witnessed a gay vs. gay aggression. Or should I say, Hillary vs. Trump attack. This confused me, considering it's his American right to have voted for Trump. Suddenly it dawned on me. If one man almost got beaten and kick out of a bar for who he felt in his heart to vote for; Oh boy, we're in trouble. The bartender didn't even want to serve him seeing he voted differently.

Sooner than later, I'll be hated for the God I choose to praise to.
Call it ludicrous, but He's been hated on since the beginning of time.
Why would it be any different for us? The one who believe.
"If the world hate you, ye know that it hated me before it hated you." John 15:18

As the division continues to grow louder and stronger in our country this next week. Take heed. This world is dark enough, don't let them take your faith too. Even as love is at the brink of extinction, continue choosing love before hatred. Let's not add to it. If you don't have a clue what that looks like, just keep looking UP.

*For wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against the principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high *places." Ephesians 6:12

One late night in Seattle I had an out of body experience.
I jotted down this love letter from my deceased mother.
She told me a long time ago she'll be living in my heart forever, here is proof.**

You have to be patient with yourself. Know that nothing comes easy. You're going to fall multiple times throughout life but doesn't mean you can't stand above it. You'll have people who will break your heart having you searching for answers that you may never find. But know when it's right to let go. The more you look at the past the more destructive you'll become. I want you to be happy, I know you're more than capable of that. I remember you being a little girl that used to laugh at the little things. Understand life has it's ups & downs, that is something you'll never be able to escape. Remove yourself from anything negative or harmful to your heart. You are who you are & no one can alter that. Experience living but take advantage of the tangible things in front of you. Life doesn't always go as planned. The choices you make can only lead you to what fate has already decided. Love yourself like I did when I first met you at birth. Keep me close to you & never forget how much I love you.

- Mommy Dora