I suppose if death is staring you in the face, the first one to blink
loses.

Even with distance I know you are smiling
Even through the pain
Even though I am not around
I am with you
I always will be for the simple fact
You are my very best friend
And I love you
I know you are strong
I know you are intelligent
And you'll find a way to get though
Any challenge, any war
And I want you to know
You aren't fighting alone.

The way you wear your favorite nirvana shirt makes me smile
I enjoy listening to you ramble in thought
There's something different in your tone
I know you are sad, but so am I
And maybe together we can find happiness
I'm not asking to be addicted to one another
I'm asking to be company
To sit and talk about the stars
To listen to Pearl Jam on repeat
To teach me video games and laugh uncontrollably at my lack of skill
I'm hoping to be the reason you smile even if it is for the shortest time period

They told me you could overdose on pain killers,
But I only assumed they meant sleeping pills, prescriptions, and medicines
However I managed at my own fault
to overdose on the way you laughed, the deep color of your eyes, and the intoxication of your skin on mine
Now here I'm left drug less and aching with your memories.

I believe there's more to life than
Love
And
Small towns,
That anything can happen in the
Night lights
And
Street sounds

I suppose it would be easy to say
"I love you."
without hesitation in the midst of ******* another, but ask yourself is it just as easy to say as they stand before you fully dressed and begging for you to stay,
Or is it easier to be silent and walk away?

She was a force of nature
Her blood ran as cold as a tundra
Her thoughts spun like a tornado
She was the reason hurricanes were named after people
She could leave you drenched and defeated like a tsunami
Her kisses were electrifying
God gave her the beauty of a spring flower
She was a natural disaster the news forgot to warn you about.
She was catastrophic

Love is an act of selflessness
Love can come in the form of
"Put on your seat belt"
"Take a jacket"
"Be careful"
"I miss you"
Love is blind
Love sometimes goes unnoticed and can be taken for granted
Oh but how we cling to the idea of loving and being loved back.

When she'd kissed more bottles than she had boys
And spent more nights in strange bars than her own bed
She came to the conclusion that heart break hurt worse than a hangover

Love & cigarettes
One is a drug, an addiction
The other a dangerous feeling, emotion
Both will **** you slowly but surely
Yet we are only warned about cigarettes
And here I am having never touched a cigarette to my lips
But I feel another poision
As I inhale the smell of your clothes
As I pull your lips to mine
No one ever warned me that another living soul could be my downfall
So it won't be cancer,tar, or nicotine when I go only
Your smile, your kiss, and a goodbye

Pyromania teaches you
something;
Playing with fire
is much like
playing with hearts,
someone will always
feel the burn.

I am
A paradox
An endless code
A puzzle with missing pieces
But unlike any riddle,
I have no answer
I am not to be solved
I only require the effort of trying to be cracked down
All I need is some indication of interest

The color has finally returned to my lips
I am no longer chilled by your presence
The ice is thawing
I am now healing
So dear God please stay away from me

We were raised with the ideas that love endures eternity,
Friends are forever,
Addiction is a myth,
And bad things don't happen to good people.
As we grow up we come to find
Love expires,
Friends turn on each other,
Addiction of some kind is inevitable,
Not everyone has the same heart as us.
We never saw this coming.

Who would have thought the pigment of our skin could cause such controversy?
For looking the way I do I must conform to the expectations of society.
If I could shed my skin like a snake maybe you'd finally understand that I am just like you.
I cannot act a color the same way you cannot see a sound, and I will not apologize for who I was born to be.

I don't want to cry so hard
I don't want to feel this weak
But what can you do when you've dealt the worst card
I swear this deck is stacked
My hand starts out well and then slowly costs me all my chips

But how do you win when you've already lost?
And how do you forgive when you already know the cost?
What's it feel like?
I can't tell anymore, I'm so long lost.
Does it ever end?
Do we stop, dry our eyes, just pretend?
And if there is indeed a way out which one do you recommend?
What's it feel like?
Is there hope for the lost souls?
Is there a way to be good again?

Without a flaw about you.
Every scar, freckle, and cut is a work of art.
Every thought in your mind is a work of art.  
Every expression you make is in itself breathtaking.
Each beat of your heart sparks the rhythm of a symphony.
You are without a  doubt
Without a flaw about you.

The feeling of desire burns like a fire and with the thought of you I could burn down a city.

Empty
Ice cream
Containers

My mind wanders on a twisted path
My thoughts are a tangled in the same way our hands do when intertwined
I even forgot to check my spaghetti when I began to think about seeing your face
I guess what I'm saying is, you occupy my mind in a whole new way

He looked at me like I was everything
I saw it
And I suppose at the time,
I was everything,
But time has a way of changing

Maybe you don't think God is hearing you, but maybe you'll have to shout instead of whispering.

Restless waters swallowed her,
But in the midst of the raging sea
She was breathing just fine.

I used to think of you leaving me with desperate gasps of air and tear soaked cheeks
I swore I wouldn't make it through the lonely days and night
I swore that I would die of an aching heart.
Yet here I sit, still breathing, still surviving. All that is left is a scar of your memorie and the clothes and gifts in my closet.

The most disturbing
thought that I feel with each day
is what if there's ever a chance to feel the same way,
If god gives us one soulmate
What if mines gone astray?
Is there still a chance,
Or has this one love sealed my fate?

1:10 am
Im just here thinking about this year, and all the messes I've made.
I can't help but wonder,
Do you feel the same?

Those brilliant blue eyes,
They held wonders you couldn't imagine.
They held thoughts you couldn't fathom.
Locked inside were all the things I wanted to know.
Those brilliant blue eyes.

Again and again
Over and over
Time never stops but here it never changes
Day after day
Night after night
I wake up everyday and I dream every night
The same dream and the same routine
Does it ever end
Again and again
Over and over
déjà vu

Maybe it's the way the stars for you,
Or
The galaxies inside your eyes,
Or
The sunlight you add to my dreary days,
But I know you are my universe.

Do as you wish today
Tomorrow it could be illegal,
Living in a world where it's accepted to hate those who are different rather than accept all
What is there left to lose,
when humanity is lost in itself?

You left silent as the wind
I walk alone with an air of purpose
You spoke harsh words like thunder
I dance to the music of the storm
You stole the heart that beats only for you
I've learned to live without one.

I'm
Falling to pieces
But
I only
Want to fall asleep.

Where would I be without you by my side?
Where would I be without a hand to hold?
Where would I be without a face to smile at?
Where would I be with out someone to laugh with?
Where would I be without my other half?
The answer? I can't bare to find out.

I can no longer hold my bones together
with the arms of boys who want only one thing
I can no long stay silent and let others write my story
I chase drinks and dreams, but never people
And I am not your typical teenager drunk on the idea of love and living recklessly
I am living for myself
Yesterday
Today
And tomorrow

I am surrounded by a love that so bright it scolds fire.
I feel an embrace so strong it can sustain the weight of the Earth.
I see a face so beautiful it must belong to only an angel.
I hear a voice so sweet that not even a thousand choruses could match it.
This is truly how it feels to love you.

When the bass pounding in your heart
Feels more at home than
The walls of your room
Or your lovers arms
Or the old tree house in your yard
You begin to realize,
Music is more than noise

You know what they say,
Drunk thoughts are sober words
And as I sip from my cup
you're all I can fathom.
I might not be sober at mind but I've done some thinking, will you be mine.

But I'm not hear to give you unrealistic expectations
I write not of cliche love stories, sadness, or the color of walls around me
I write to express
I write to feel freedom
I write to please myself
And tell you my truths

The phone rings and I flinch hoping just maybe it's you.
If I were able to breathe I would tell you I still love you.
If I could stop the tears for a few minutes I would want to see you.
Despite every thing, against all odds, through the pain, I want you.