A rip off
To people like me
Who just lost
Someone
But it is the best guarantee
For those who are suffering
From lack of freedom
Or if the are suffering greatly physically
Call it want you want
But death is a great promise
Though a pain in ****

As I was walking out if my place if employment
I saw what looked
Like a coyote
Shape shift
To a wolf
and then from wolf to
Human to crow
In the dead of night
As I see this
My breathe is taken away
As if the wind was knocked out if
Me

I want to believe
For real

The Big Dipper
A sign that something
Or someone made and created
Our fare universe
And the planet with in it
As I look up at the Big Dipper
I see a chance to pray
A chance to worship
But I believe this asterism
Is a piece of simple art,
Perfect and delicate
That even tattoo artists cannot recreate
But do we have to give this entity:
A book, and a place to worship!
No?!  For it is nature

Caffeine
I cannot live with it
Nor
I cannot  with out it
For I turn into a troll
At the  strike
9 am

As I see the Christmas
Tree, with all the lights
On it
I see many psychedelic
Colours
Colours I love to
See
Every year
Why do people do drugs
When the can get high
Off life!
As I see the Christmas light
Blue
I feel an new!

My first experience
With clairvoyance
Was nit a good experience
I walked into a house
This house had
Negative energy
As if some wanted to attack me
But it was the energy at the time
Then my sister told
Me this that
Some worm killed his family
And him self in the exact
House I was staying
Oh the terror I felt

Depression is a struggle
A struggle that is not just
Emotional and mental
But also physical
As that you find  that
You will will not be able to
Make a definitive
Decision
This indecision
Is more intense
The gaping sadness
That it depression
This struggle is real
The struggle is permanently
Scarring
not just to you
But your friends

We make believe  about monsters
Cryptids, spirits and demons
To help explain
Away the evil in the world
Make up these stories
To help us cope with
Hard time
Be it as a collective
Or personal

13
Was the most unlucky year
Of the life
From the get go
I was skinnier
And more paranoid than
Dale Gribble
Helllo this day I still believe in aliens

I am not religious  
I don't believe on the devil
Nor
I believe in demons
For we make our own
But this I will say
I believe the evils of man
I am just a suthsay
Ie. 9/11

February baby
Amythest baby
For our stone
Means intelligent
And wisdom
But they also calm
And help others sleep
It’s strange to be an amythest
Baby

You probable hear a lot of this
F word from Hank hill
But that f word is freedom
That word happened today
When
A sad Assad regime
Tooled for the last time
Let’s pray for more friend
And joy and peace this winter season

Full-moon light
Can create
Frightening and
Disturbing shadows that seem
To shape-shifting at a wim
As I walk the halls to get the bathroom
The full-moon exposes
The darkness of the corners
But yet the corners of our minds too
As I see these shape shifting
Shadows turn from evil
To horrific
I wish I stayed in my room

I am a ginger not the drink
But I am who i am
Take it out leave it
But this I will say
That you will pay the price for
You abscennce and abuse
By having my snap
Oh ginger snapps
Oh ginger snapps
But it will be justified
For who you treated me

There once was a fish named Deb.
Who lived in a nice simple fish bowl of water.
She enjoyed her decorations and swim happily but didn't know
if she was hurting the humans around her with water. As she grew and grew the more panicked people got
and soon they had to switch Fish bowls to
the aquariums to the point where they could no longer afford them
soon the fish died because it grew In unsanitary conditions.
Poor deb.

Yes I am goth
That doesn't makes me
The big-bad wolf
I am just trying
To live like everyone
Else
Despite my scary
Clothing and make-up
It's just that clothing
And makeup as well
Music ; it does not
Have baring
On how I act

Grounding  is like putting your self on a charger
Grounding is connecting back to nature
Grounding going back on line with the spirit world
You see
We are not all different from
Our electronics

I walk the streets
Looking for friends
I walk the streets in
The middle of the night
As I am in search of
Of friend life forms
But only to
Be met with hate
Only to be ridiculed
Only to be
Forced to fit in

I was given at age thirty
Many vision
Many messages
Of the world to come
The first the pandemic
The war in Ukraine
And something much worse
I was also sent to tour hell
As I went through with
The protection of an arch angel
I see that gory scenes of just 3 circle and 9 sub circles
And a poison desert
For the worst of humans

If I could I would deal with my fathers death more

Easily then I am

If I could I would deal with

This ******* confusion with out

The confusion of others

If I could there would be no winter

As I hate having S.A.D.

if I could I would press the reboot button on my life

For where did I go wrong

Grade 8??!!

I walk the line between life and death
This apple's rotten, rotten to the core
Get up, get up, off your knees
Get down, get down, on the floor!
I walk the line
I walk the line
I walk the line
Between life and death
My business is a little clock and scythe
I drink so much I don't walk I merely stagger!
No you wouldn't listen & I don't blame you
No I don't blame ya!
I walk the line
I walk the line
I walk the line
I walk the line
Between life and death
My rent is 30 a day
I can't move
You know that's the price you pay
Is life all in vain?
Starts off in my arm
Opens up my brain
I'm already in the gutter -
Next stop is the morgue!
I walk the line
I walk the line
I walk the line
I walk the line
Between life and death
Live fast, die old
Live fast, die old
I walk the line
Death
I walk the line
I walk the line
I walk the line
I walk the line
Between life and death
While others have been thinking about it - I've been there and back
Hall and here
I walk the line
I walk the line
I walk the line
I walk the line
Between life and death

This I would read
As it was up to my speed
At recess while the other kids were
Beating eachother up
And torment one and other
While I was when one the beaten
And tormented
I took to studying law
During recess in
Avoidance of the bullies
This.... this was
My mother's idea

Years of being bullied
Being called all sorts of
Of names
Getting in all sorts of fights
Pulling all sorts of pranks
On my torturers
The grim *******
Alex, Karen and jennifer
Has nearly lead to
Me dead on day
In Guantanamo Bay
I wish I lie
But that was what I was threatened
With
Given the choice of life or death
I chose life and became a yakuza
It was only for my only safety
But I learned some lessons on the way
The hard way

I was going to the high computer literacy class
A class that I despise
A class that I dread
I go and sit but .....
It was the last time I sit for all of eternity
As I sit  out taking a breath
I don't feel my heart beat
I was sitting lifeless  in my chair
Some of the students noticed that I was not doing
Anything
The teacher was calling 911 as he noticed that I was not breathing as I just sit there limp
It feels like I was locked in my dead body, my soul that was!
I cannot enter the spirit world and as I try to enter. The realm
I am just at the borderlands
I wish I could move but I could not
Soon they realized what I already know
That I was dead and in limbo!  As they realized this they call
The medical examiner instead
Because I ain't breathing
Then I was taking to the morgue
As the drive I scream
"It's the ******* classes that caused my death
The ******* stress and boredom
The fact that I was deciding to break free!"
But what the does the driver say nothing  as I try to be heard!
I am processed and borough in for autopsy
The medical examiner said this ....
"Who do we have here today!"
She looks at my papers and said my full name
Elena Melanson
Before she could get the scalpel I tell physically make sounds
Telling her he exact cause of death
"It was that ******* computer lit class
That killed me, it borded and
Stressed me to death!"  
She finds this remarkable that I would be able to talk with
My own voice
Then for the last time my soul hits the boarder lands
And goes right to the spirit world
And that was when my body went limp for the last time
Had I found peace? 
I am from dearh's cold grip and I find that I am
In a perpetual summer with
Wild followers all over the place
It seems peaceful and I go to the light
I am at peace!"

When inwas in High-school
My mom compared my
Writing to Virginia Wolf
For I was alover the place


When I was in high school
I got a taste of the Sims 4
I did not like that game
The green diamond ****** me off


When I was in high school
I was given the first hint
About my Asian
Ancestry by my father

A lot has happened when I was In highschool

Form my father I learned about the night sky
But alas I did not
Think that learning from the nights sky about life
The stars are always there
Hidden by the day
The moon shows that we can have phases
The sun
Ups and downs in life
And that to find your way home
The Big Dipper
Will point you the right way!
This is not what I expected to learn from the night sky
The idea of being human

What a nickel to spend 

At the recycling centre

But I rather keep this coin

I name it Nikki 

As I found these 

Are getting rarer and rare 

By the day

 As I find that

It makes me more 

Insecure about society

Oh hell
That is a strong way
Start the day nothing
Good come from anything
That’s stars with hell
So say you
Flip the script

Oh I am just an x-file
A freak of nature
Oh I am a girl
Oh I am a girl
But no one gives a ****

So I am just an x-file
Haunting the streets
Hoping for the best
Oh I am just a girl
Oh I am just a girl
But no one care

Oh oh oh
Oh oh oh
I am just an x-file
Just hanging out
Hoping to be the next punk
Oh I am just a girl
Oh I am just a girl
But no one cares
One one cares

So I was shoveling snow
For no more then money
Oh no the snow!  But I was
Able to see and hear
The kid screaming with glee
As the re was a fresh snow fall
That shovelling session payed
More then just money
But joy and glee too

Pain is unpleasant
Pain is what you feel
When something is
Not voting your way
But also pain is a sign that your alive
Be great full
For I am dead

As I walk down a rainy street
I see what looked like origami boats
Floating


Float float float
Until the boats
Reach the singularity
That is the storm drain


We all float, we all
Float down
And down we go!

People don't understand me
For I have been to the spirit
World and back

People don't understand me
For I see ghosts
From the other side

People don't understand
The fact that I am sensitive
The call me names


Insane
******
And spazz

Don't the lyrics know their words hurt

As I walk around 

I see that there in 

A crack of cement 

Is a plant growing

As I find that the plant is struggling 

I water it

And help it grow 

Soon there are buds on the plant

A flower




It’s a poppy

Doing the impossible

There are stark similarities
To the amount of color
In both
And I say both Christmas and
Pride
As the have thr same colors
Red
Orange
Yellow
Green
Blue
Indigo
Pink
Alas one is in the day
The other lights up the night

As I write 

I am not going to lie

As I have

Being suffering 

Since October 15, 2024

If wasn’t it just me that suffered

But everything in my life 

At that

The pain I am going through is similar to 

Rendition 

Guantanamo 

Or Abu giahib 

I am wish I was laying as this 

Is what grief will do to you 

Emotionally detain and torture you!

These are the words that I despise
I shall not tell you
What words
Nor why I hate these words
For they are
Hateful
Evil
And
Just plain stupid
To say
Why do people say offensive
Slurs
I will never know

The sky
Either friendly
Or hostile
As the weather changes
Like our personality
We change for the better
And sometimes the worse
But in nature she
Shape shifter for sure
Ever so changing

The thing I
Love about shovelling
Snow is seeing
It spark and fall in
The sun light
As it glimmers
I love to see the snow fall
Heavily and gracefully in the
Evening
Snow is annoying
But it’s beautiful

The spectres of the past 

That haunt me 

Causing me extreme pain that 

I feel I can not handle 

At the moment 

But I know I 

Will oust these ghosts

From my life

Not the other way around

As I bump my head and thought I was going to have a
Concussion but that concussion
Turned into spilled brain rot

Spilled ink
Isn’t about tattoos but it is
About pain and emotion
The feeling that get spilled
In the creative process
But will be a pain to
Repair that is spilled ink
When you  put your heart
In everything

I am always all over the emotion
Wheel when I am creating
And spilling ink
As I feel the full scope of the
Emotions
Like carrying a child to term
It is joyous and painful
And yet I do it every **** day

As I spill my ink
I feel like an octopus
Ink every where
But I still have to design that
Tattoo
And write this poem
Though painful at times
Emotionally
It will be well with
The spilled ink

When I sleep I
Enter a mysterious world
That is closed off to most
Of the living
You could call it a dream
Nit a dream its not
It's the spirit world
There I have done more
Benefit the negativity
There in this haunting
World is of
Great beauty
Great pain
And surreal

Stacking is fun when stacking
A bunch of septum rings
To make your nose look
Cute
But that is just me
I hate fitting in
Though I would thousands of
Years ago

When the sun shines
On this rare stone
Three rays crossing
Each other
Come out on the stone
As we see the three
Rays
It’s a  sign of hope
Peace and faith
I don’t know what a black star
Sapphire is that
Of happiness for it
Wards off the Grimm moods

A polarian starseed
I am
Drawn to the north star
I am
Polarized thinking
I have
Aversion to most 'humans'
I have
I finally found were my soul
Originate from
We all have to be from
Somewhere
With a dash of Indigo
Who like justice ⚖️

When I was going for a drive
Well being driven when
I realized that I did not have
My phone nor iPad
Were with me
The same thing with Sirenhead
I was not able to picture
The
Discs of light
Flying through the night sky
UFOs I saw
But I never thought to take a picture
But this I say
I believe