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Dec 2018 · 2.6k
Shadow Ball
Kris Fireheart Dec 2018
Feeling...
Ceiling...
Crush another can,
Something wonderful!
Wasted now,
Broken house...

Yeah...

Defeat,
Concrete...
Take another hit,
And it's all complete,
Just **** me,
Oh,  **** me...

Yeah...

Can't you see?
It's my creed,
Blood red seas,
So permanently!
And this is me!
Oh, this is me...

Yeah...

Sunlight,
So bright,
I think about a day,
I've never had my rights!
I'm Equal,
And Unequal...

Yeah...

Shadow ball!
Oh,  shadow ball,
Tell me why I never
Had faith at all!
Just let me sleep,
Oh, let me sleep,

Yeah...

Oh, Hashish,
And *****,
I can't imagine when
I've ever felt so numb!
Just guide me,
And hide me...

Yeah...

It's something new,
And something *******,
A form of happiness
I never thought I'd brew,
But still, I knew,
Oh, I knew...

Yeah...

Shadow ball,
Oh, shadow ball,
Tell me why I never
Had faith at all!
Just let me feel,
And leave me be...

Yeah...
About my favorite combination.  I call them shadow *****.
Nov 2018 · 778
I am Broken
Kris Fireheart Nov 2018
I am broken;
A broken man.
Something important
Has died inside.

I swore to myself,
That I would never again
Lose control of my senses,
But now, here I am...

I drank so much liquor,
I poisoned myself.
And now, every day,  
I awaken to hell.

And one week later,
I thought I'd recovered,
But then came the pills,
And calls from my mother.

There's twenty-four hours,
In each of these days,
But for those lost moments,
I lived in a haze.

Too scared to seek sleep,
For the nightmares would come,
I wished to high hell
That I still owned a gun.

I opened my eyes
And a full day had passed.
The last I remember,
I'd fell to the grass.

The cop took some pity,
And instead of jail,
He took me to detox,
It didn't end well.

The sixty-four xanax
I swallowed that night,
Still give me the shakes
And I wake up in fright.

It may not have killed me,
But it might as well,
For someone so "blessed"
I feel broken as hell.

It's been two more days,
And I can't help but think
What may have happened
If I'd stepped to the brink...

No cliff is too high,
No bayou too small,
Even now, I imagine,
Of ending it all.

My friends have all left me,
There's scars on my hands.
It serves to remind me,
I am a broken man...
Sorrow, depression, overdose accidental arrest real regrets
Oct 2018 · 580
Never...
Kris Fireheart Oct 2018
Nevermind,
It's never mine,
What I've never done;
Never left behind,
I'd never thought,
I'd never find...

Broken,
Shaken,
Never had a thought;
Never crossed my mind,
Never thought I'd know,
Never thought I'd mind...

Shotgun,
Rusted,
Never thought twice,
Filled my veins with ice,
I've never lied,
I've Never died...

But never's fine,
I've never twice,
Played a game of never mind with my life,
I'll never find,

I'm never fine...
Meh...
Oct 2018 · 446
David
Kris Fireheart Oct 2018
This mournful sky,
An endless grey.
Mother nature knows how I feel today...
My kindest friend
Has passed away...

His gentle smile,
The largest heart.
It's hard to believe you're a world apart...
What I would give,
If you could stay...

But what to do?
What can I say?
Every time we met, you'd always brighten my day.
We'd laugh and cry,
We'd drink and play...

With shining eyes,
You'd be my guide,
A part of me was lost on the day you died...
I hope, in sleep,
You find some peace...

The nicest man
I've ever known,
Taken too soon from a love- filled home,
The prime of life
Before your eyes...

But one day,
We'll meet again.
We'll share a drink and reminisce,  two best friends.
I'll see you there,
At heaven's end....

There has to be,
A place to see,
Somewhere they take in people even like you and me,
To keep us safe,
And set us free...

But just tonight,
I think i'll cry.
I'll say a little prayer and I'll whisper goodbye,
To a gentle man,
A friend of mine...
This poem is dedicated to the memory of my friend David, who passed from this world last Saturday.  I'll be missing you, big guy.  You have no idea...
Mar 2018 · 205
Faded
Kris Fireheart Mar 2018
It's three A.M.,
I'm still awake...
Everybody's calling, but it's way too late.
So I decide,
to take a ride...

A hanging fog,
no license plates,
I don't know where to go, but I can find a better place.
I'll  park my car,
inside this haze...

Faded...
Faded...
I know I'm gonna find no peace tonight!
Just make a plan,
to stay awake...

And I'll be fine,
if I can find,
Another way to live without another white line,
without *******,
or Dexedrine...

With how I feel,
I need some pills,
I'll stimulate my brain,  hopping on the 'D' train,
And we can ride
And see the sky...

It's six A.M.,
I'm still awake,
Everybody's still calling, for Christ's sake!
But I don't care,
And I'll be there...

I've stayed alive,
since Friday night,
The week has only started but I know I'll survive,
This isn't much,
It's just enough...

Faded...
Faded...
Just another day when I can ride or die!
Just watch the sky
And nevermind...
this is what pulling all nighters really is like. kinda stressful, kinda stimulating,  never boring.  ever.
Mar 2018 · 582
Empty Streets
Kris Fireheart Mar 2018
A shadow rises in the morning,
A sudden darkness through the trees.
The sun is shining through the doorway,
The spirits whisper on the breeze.

I found myself a lonely island,
A place, I felt,  I'd find some peace,
I missed the cliff as I was driving,
Missed the warm rush of the sea.

Another night on my horizon,
I stole a candle for some light,
I'd never thought much of surviving,
But I feel sure it'll be alright.

The lizard greets me in the morning,
The scaly messengers of kings.
And life is anything but boring,
when all that's left is empty streets.

The bells are calling them to mourning,
The ones who march in silent sleep.
A field of poppies beckons for me;
A shallow grave but three feet deep.
I wrote this poem to a friend of mine doing time in prison.  He said he wanted something he could "see"and "feel."
Mar 2018 · 631
Southern Comforts
Kris Fireheart Mar 2018
Full moon on a
Friday night,
sipping whiskey and
watching sky,

Howl, howl,
at the light,
The wind is pure,
Conditions right.

Southern Comforts I
hold dear,
Seasons won't
affect us.

Peace and harmony,
right here,
In the heart of
Texas.

Light my smoke,
unleash my dog,
A friend is cooking
his dad's wild hog.

Sipping whiskey,  and
making fog,
Full moon on a
Friday night.

A little more ice,
A little less beer.
A little more light,
A little less fear.

These Southern Comforts
I have here,
These friends who sway,
Around me.

The whiskey flows,
The fire glows,
These guys start talking
about old "hoes,"

And everyone knows,
how that **** goes,
Full moon on a
Friday night...
This is tonight, plain and simple.  Tuning out my "frat boy" friends and just enjoying my buzz again...
Feb 2018 · 478
Sometimes, Sunshine
Kris Fireheart Feb 2018
On lonely days,
when I feel broke,
The kind of day that feels like I've lost
All hope,
It comes to take
Away the pain...

It splits the sky;
It clears the rain.
It sends a ray of light into my
Shadow -filled brain.
For just today,
It'll be okay...

But sometimes,
Sunshine,
It clears away the fog and it helps remind,
That I deserve
This gift of life...

And sometimes,
Sunshine,
Means another day when I can
Let it all out,
And I can smile,
Without my doubts...

On days when I
Sit locked inside,
Feeling so depressed I couldn't laugh
Or cry,
I'd close my eyes,
And step outside...

And sometimes,
Sunshine,
Like a memory from another
Lifetime,
A warm embrace;
My kindest friend...

On endless months,
Or brutal weeks,
Those times when even sleep never
Brings relief,
No drink or pill
Can give me peace...

I lay awake,
Beneath the sheets,
Begging for a dream that doesn't have
To be sweet.
Just let me fade,
And end this day...

But when I wake,
It covers me,
Brightest of them all in the Great Black
Sea,
It seems to say,
"Come out and play. "

See, sometimes,
Sunshine,
Means another day when I can
Never mind,
And leaves me free,
To just be Me...

And sometimes,
Sunshine,
Makes me think about why I
Doubt myself,
This gentle breeze
Can set me free...
I wrote this earlier this evening while watching the sunset at the park. It can be read as either a song or a poem.  The colors  of sunset  always have a way of making me smile,  no matter how ****** I feel that day.
Feb 2018 · 488
Cocaine
Kris Fireheart Feb 2018
Straight from my hands to my nose.
Numb from my head to my toes.

Take a deep breath,  'cause its not
Over yet,
When your heart starts to pound and your head starts to sweat.

The denominations of your conversations,
They turn to elation and full demonstration,
It rings in your head like a radio station,
This rushed and egregious euphoric sensation,
This white lubrication for socialization,

This is what I call *******.
One of my inspired ******* moments from my early college years. I did every drug in the book before I turned 25. I wanted to "feel" it all... Three years of ****** addiction later,  I finally started to realize that maybe that was a BAD idea...
Feb 2018 · 857
Iceamphetamine
Kris Fireheart Feb 2018
Shiny shards of slowly death
Rush,  cough,  and take a breath..
Its all they can to re inject
Another night on Tina's breast.

I watch them from afar, disgusted
My two best friends went homeless,
Got busted.

See,  I might do some coke or smoke ***** all day,
But i can't understand this game they all play.

Always crystal or ***** or ****** or yay,
One more way to make my fiery heart fade.

But i told them i wasn't going back to those days,
I'll stick with my greenery, downers and stay...

Alive.
this is a drug poem. Everyone i know does ****, and I hate the changes i see in them.
I've grown up and out of hard drug use,  looking towards my future.  So many i know have not...
Feb 2018 · 349
Can you help me?
Kris Fireheart Feb 2018
A feeling.
A burst of light.
A desperation.
A cry for help.
A hint of joy.
A ray of hope.
A sadness...

Haggard men in tattered clothing
On the concrete sandbars
Of the great black stone
Rivers.
Thirsty.  Starving.
"Thank you and God bless!"

Can you help me?
Do you care?

Pastor sits in his wooden box.
On your knees in your
Private prison.
Pass the collection plate.
Glory,  hallelujah!

Can you help me?
Do you care?

High school kids shoot ******.
One long row of
Slack bodies.
Deep nods.
Where am I? What am I doing here?

Can you help me?
Do you care?

A new government,  built on
Bad decisions.
For the money,  of the moneyed.
Blinding white hair,  trading blood
For precious oil...
"We, the people of the United States..."

Can you help me?
Do you care?

A sadness.
A desperation.
A cry for help.
A burst of light.  
A hint of joy.
A ray of hope.
A feeling...
I don't remember exactly when i wrote this one.  Sometime last year.
Feb 2018 · 416
The Chosen
Kris Fireheart Feb 2018
We are children of the Rainbow.
Sacred blessings from the Sky .
To make our homes in The valleys,
They hoped that we would become
Wise.

We were chosen by the Moonlight.
To give our hearts to the Sun,
A sacred duty sworn to no one.
We'll be whole when it is done.

We are marching through a darkness,
In silent search of holy light.
Some have strength and some are hopeless...
I pray they all survive the night.

Morning sun on my horizon,
Show me to thy golden throne.
Fill the Sky with stars and diamonds,
And send a ship to take me home...
This is a bit of a weird one,  I'll admit. I wrote this one morning while watching a sunrise with friends on psychedelics.  Can you guys see anything here?
Feb 2018 · 369
Heroin Holly
Kris Fireheart Feb 2018
She had everything she
needed,
To make most men fall.
Mindless zombies,
Men like me,  so oblivious
To it all.

Smelled her cooking,
So sick and
so sweet
A poison that's all her own.
****** swept her off
Her feet,
Now Holly
Wants to be alone.

She slithers down my street
At night,
A needle in her hand.
One more shot and ****** Holly
Fades to neverland...

In her eyes,  I see
Her past.
It's all so dark and sad.

Under her bruises,  I
Can see her light.
The only hope she
Has...
about a girl i used to know.  Sad story.
Feb 2018 · 305
My Two Best Friends
Kris Fireheart Feb 2018
My two best friends,
They've changed so much
Since we first met.
We once were close,  
Though really,
Who isn't?
These are my
Two best friends.

I still see them often,
Each morning
Or evening.
When I drive home.
They always stand
On the same corner.
Not quite dead,
But not alive.
These are my
Two best friends.
Too sad to even describe,  really.
Feb 2018 · 245
Bad Morning
Kris Fireheart Feb 2018
This morning I woke up and reached
for the knife,
Cause I thought for a second of ending
my life,
Then I took one more minute
and thought about them
My Father, my mother,  my family
and friends.
That **** you come up with real deep
in your head
On those mornings you wake up
and wish you were dead.
I said "**** it"and reached for
My whiskey instead,
Took a shot, Lit my Cigarette,
and
hopped out of bed.
I'm pretty depressed this morning,  so I took to pen and paper when i woke up.
Feb 2018 · 694
Deathsong of The Ceruni
Kris Fireheart Feb 2018
In dryest desert
Lay hidden jewels,
The monuments of days gone by,
Beneath the holy
Sands of Time,
Where altars to the Old Gods lie,

I found myself
Without my faith,
And could not pray, for I would die,
When I awoke,
Beneath the palms,
At the temple of the Ceruni.

To see their Gods,
Such power and fear!
For I've felt no presence as I have felt here,
So strong,  so pure,
So rich; Alive!
The Gods have felt so near this night.

I wandered in,
Through sacred gardens,
Which no other man had yet seemed defy,
And came upon her,
Her robes as the snow,
The Goddess of the Ceruni.

She beckoned me
From silvered dome,
Where she was seated,  upon silver throne,
I passed the great hemp
And red poppies which shone,
To lay my eyes upon her.

"O Dear Goddess," did i cry,
"Have the heart to tell me why,
When I have spent my days and nights,
Not quite dead, Yet not alive,
Am I shrouded in your Holy Light? "

She gave no words,
But simply smiled,
I, gripped by silence all the while,
Could find no speech
Nor pause for thought,
As she whispered lessons which one time, were taught.

You may think me mad;
I swear I am not!
I'll point out the towers if we find the spot,
Such silver and gold,
Such wonderful shine!
To be in a place where the Gods would recline.

I've witnessed the spires
Of fallen empires,
So proudly they stand in desert dry!
But I've no recollection,
Upon sudden reflection,
Of where the Holy Temple lies.

But when I die,
O, take me there!
Where hemp and poppy kiss the sky!
And on my slate,
Let them write,
"Here lies the last of the Ceruni!"
I love Samuel Taylor Coleridge, and I've always thought about experimenting with the extremely visual and often ***** tinted Romantic style.  I think it came out pretty well. After all,  I DO know my subject quite intimately.
Feb 2018 · 211
"Feeling, " #5
Kris Fireheart Feb 2018
Rain...
From her perch
Above the sky
Our Mother Earth
Feeds her children.
And with her
Rain,
She watches us
Grow.
Our large and
Colorful
Family.
Another one from my short "feeling"series.
Feb 2018 · 440
"Feeling," #3
Kris Fireheart Feb 2018
The mind is a trap house,
With too many rooms,
And infinite closets,
Which hide
The secret skeletons.
Ten thousand white doors,
Which lead only
To darkness,
And so many
Crusted windows
Where shadows
Shine brightly.
Part of my short "feeling"series.
Feb 2018 · 227
To See The Stars
Kris Fireheart Feb 2018
To see her smile,
Beyond the sky,
Great Mother Earth who brings us life,  
And hear her voice,
Among the stars,
Our kind and gentle guide from strife,

I'd give it all;
One Hundred - fold,
And all the days 'til I grow old,
To pierce her veil,
Of endless blue,
Each second,  a treasure to behold.

To see a world,
Beyond the black,
I'd leave,  and i might not come back.
But were all men
So brave and bold,
We'd enter space with fierce attack.

"It's only human, "
I've heard say,
"To ponder over a life in space, "
But if ever
We leave this place,
Will it save our human race?
A moment in time.  That's all it takes to be inspired.  A starry night.  A comet. The SpaceX Tesla launch...
Kris Fireheart Feb 2018
He sits low,
But he rides high.
Their heads turn
When he drives by.
He won't stop
Unless you're trying
To buy,

The Man with the silver rings.

When he gets a call,
He'll drive to your house,
"Whatever you need,
A gram to an ounce,
It takes a bit longer,
If you want a pound. "

He'll bring you anything...

The party began
When his backpack arrived;
And when it was emptied,
It withered and died,
It took him one phone call,
To get resupplied,

And back on the scene of things...

The door's always open,
In case he stops by,
With Haze or Rhino
Or Widow or Thai
Sometimes he'll bring presents,
He doesn't supply,

The Man with the silver rings.
One of my best friends is a former drug dealer who used to work like this every night.  I wrote this after his arrest.
Kris Fireheart Feb 2018
It's Friday night,
And it's almost ten,
So I've hit the ***** streets,
To meet with some friends.

I've left my car keys,
"Forgotten" my wallet,
And taken the Metro
To where Main Street begins.

I found them at "Deans,"
Up a floor and a half,
Smoking some Black Magic
In the elevator shaft.

My new best friend
Is about to perform,
But He's got stage fright,
As such is the norm,

On a Friday night,
On Main Street...

Before they start playing,
They take one last drink,
Then the music begins,
Before I can think.

When it's over,  they're happy,
It was a nice crowd,
But now it's time to pack up,
And get the hell out.

So we left their guitars
In the bass player's car.
To go for a walk,
But we won't get too far,
Until we see shadows
And signs of life,

On a Friday night,
On Main Street...

They tilt from the corners,
And lean on the walls,
Their palms are held open,
Their gaze always falls.

They ask for a dollar,
Or something at all,
A smoke or a drink,
A simple phone call.

On Fridays like this,
I so often give thought,
To those unfortunate souls
Our "fair" city forgot,

In this land of  the plenty,
They have nothing at all;
Just a lonely spot,

On Main Street...
I wrote this after meeting some friends including my then fiance,  downtown for a show. The stark contrast between the cheerful partygoers of a Friday night,  coupled with the desperation and poverty within the inner city is often quite striking.
Feb 2018 · 368
They called him Fire
Kris Fireheart Feb 2018
So many years,
Lifetimes ago,
They saw him walking by the sea.
Their curious eyes
Found something new,
So they wondered what he could be.

They called him Fire,
For every night,
A mournful blaze marks his camp.
And many pairs
Of curious eyes,
Watch him shiver, cold and damp.

How he would rise
From where he lay,
To greet the morning sun each day,
Or bow his head,
His arms outstretched,
And reaching for the sky,  he'd pray.

They called him Fire,
For when he eats,
The trees are filled with deathly smoke,
And as he stood,
Above his ****,
With tear - filled eyes,  he often spoke.

To ask relief,
From sacred names,
A penance for the life he'd ended,
And swear anew,
To end his shame,
That he'd see balance once more mended.

And so he marched,
Into the trees,
And there he found my Mother's den,
Where curiously,  he offered meat,  
And said,

"I've come to call you 'friend. '"
One of the first inspired moments I've had in a while.  Can anybody guess whose eyes i saw him through?
Dec 2017 · 277
The Soul Of a Man
Kris Fireheart Dec 2017
The Soul Of a Man

By C. Anderson

What is the soul of a man?
Is it hidden in his heart?
Does it rise with the sun?
Or when true lovers part?

Will it rouse me in the morning?
Bring a smile to my face?
Or shed a lost and lonely tear
For that most sacred space?

What is the soul of a man?
Is it proud and true?
Or does it pine for yesterday,
And all the things we would do?

Does it shout a cry for justice?
To remind us to be strong?
Or does it dry my tears to reassure,
That this is where i belong?

What is the soul of a man?
Is it the will to admit defeat?
Or to raise a fist and take a stand
On the cold and empty streets?

So stand tall and stand proud!
Say it here,  and say it loud  !
I know who i am, and I'm about
To change the soul of a man.
My first submission to this site. I hope you enjoy it.

— The End —