What is this?
What is this feeling?
it feels warm;
I could snuggle in it forever.
Now it used to feel warm.
Now it used to be comfortable.
It feels cold.
Colder than absolute zero.
Hurts more than a thousand gashes I put on my arm
What mysterious pain;
I don't know if I already told you
that you´re the reason why I always go to class.
You are the reason why I'm still positive despite the relentless trials.
You are the reason why I live this life,
Eventhough you do not know I exist.
Because you are the High school superstar,
While I'm just the girl who fancies Romeo and other leading stars
I'm the one who mess up everything
In the midst of fun and laughing.
I bring tears to others
Even in the loving eye of mother's.
I fight like a wild cat
Always ready to give a tit for a tat.
Sometimes, I assume why God made me?
Without me,the world wouldn't be different to see.
I'm adamant for something I don't deserve,
Why this unreachable hope is still there in my nerve?
I can easily create enmity
And conditionally seek prayers to almighty.
I can flawlessly create a perfect mess,
Which unquestionably expose my evilness.
The world must be saved from such a calamity,
Hurt me,rip me, kill me, Dear Almighty.
I can never be a helper
You all can call me a trouble maker!
can't seem to put my finger on it, yet all eight tend to try,
there's no hidden agenda here, just my thumbs, me and i,
"your wild nights have done damage," they say,
white coats think i'll take that news sly.
can't seem to pull my digit, there's only one that tries,
spun the wheel, one through six, can't be denied,
my demise tastes like metal and was cold as ice,
so i ended it once, but decided it twice.
"pardon my late night knock,
so sorry to intrude,
i've been selected to be the bearer of bad news."
"what is it officer?
what are you trying to elude?
i didn't see this one coming, not one of the few. "
"i never like doing this, but it's apart of my job,
your son shot himself in the back of your saab.
slow your mind ma'am and remember the laughter,
slow your heart, as it will never beat faster,
i understand ma'am, these desperate measures,
you will fall apart, but he wrote you a letter."
"dear mamma, there's so much to say,
you've watched my path and it's visual fade,
do you remember that time on the promenade,
when we were laughing so hard and fell into the lake?
please dream about that and not your blood soaked babe,
it's not your fault, the knife was a present that day.
forgive my selfishness, don't waste a tear,
my wrath was overwhelming, even for me to bear.
by the way, if i wasn't man enough for the blade,
i loaded dad's little snub nosed 38."