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April Jul 2018
A labyrinth expands before me,
Its only prize, the truth; reality
Awaits the shrewd of mind.
At every turn lie misdirections,
One wrong choice and I am
Lost, for perils lie ahead;
Webs of lies lie waiting for their prey.
I pray for wisdom that I may not fall,
Misguided by a ghost I thought I saw;
My own illusions turn me from the light.
The path ahead is cobbled from the shadows,
Bits of truth among them shining gold,
The only light to guide my weary feet
As Darkness beckons me with gentle hands.
Temptation offers respite from my search:
“Sit down and rest, poor ragged
traveler, you search in vain
For worthless lies. I tell the truth;
One as beautiful as I is honest, sure.”
I pay no heed. The truth is rarely beautiful or pure.
April Oct 2018
Thank God for
Little things
Like teacups with
Roses on the rim

For flowers late in
Autumn
When I thought they
All were gone

And the brush of
Fingers over my hand
When I’m feeling sad

It’s the little things
I’m thankful for
The most
April Oct 2018
Sometimes
The best gift in the world
Is so simple

A corsage
Even when we aren’t going
To the dance

A bowl of warm soup
When I’m sick,
Hand delivered

And three small words
More than all:
I love you

If love could cure the flu,
I would be well.
And may the Lord be praised for that.
April Feb 2018
Two different worlds
Two seperate skies
And only one that they can see

Inside my mind
When darkness falls
There is no other soul but me

Alone I pace
In deepest night
And no one takes my hand

To lead me from
My shadowed tomb
Where I am doomed to stand

Ah, pray for me,
Though kindness helps,
For only love can save me now

A lonely girl
Lost long ago
Who does not trust, and knows not how

Too often left
Though many cared
And no one saw the pain inside

That lonely girl
The happy mask
Was made so carefully to hide

But now it cracks
The paint wears off
And someone soon is bound to know

And steps will tread
The lonely walks
Where only I’m allowed to go

Perhaps at last
Someone will break
The wall I’ve built around my heart

But no one will
For all have eyes,
And I have been too long apart

And so, alas
For here I stand
A lonely girl in a shadowed land.
April Mar 2018
What lives on beyond the day we die?
What remains of who we were before?
How can we know, while still we live,
There’s such a thing as more?

These are the midnight mysteries
My mind whispers to my heart
While my brain tries to see my soul
April Feb 2018
Oh sandman, take away my dream
So I will never cry at night,
Wake up sweating
Chilled to the bone
Because you were dead.
My greatest fear
That you will leave,
Like he did
All those years ago
8 years
3 months
7 days
Since he was dead
A day before his birthday.
He was never 9.
And I dream that you are dead
Like him.
His brother too
Died much to young.
Six short years to live.
But you outlived them both.
You are you lived past 6.
Then 9.
Now 11.
But still I wake at night
Because you were dead
In my arms
And you were so very very cold
And still.
I run into your room
And you’re asleep.
Alive.
Sometimes smiling.
But still the nightmare comes
April Apr 2018
Buzzing jumbled garbled speaking
Noisome nonsense pressing in
Laughter anger curses feelings
Pouring out in heedless din
Tumbling torrents words and phrases
Lines and essays floating by
Waves of sound sweep past my eardrums
Pressing closing passing gone
Life is so loud sometimes
April Jun 2018
I am no one special
No one powerful
Or smart
No one beautiful
Or talented
To set myself apart
And yet somebody loves me
Though only God knows why
Since I’m nobody special
In my own reflected eyes
April Feb 2018
A battle rages all around me
I stand alone amidst the storm.
The banner that I bear aloft
Is savaged by the raging wind.
The words I scream into the dark
Are lost amidst its roar,
My banner unseen, my battle cry unheard.
And yet I fight on.
I’ll scream my message from the rooftops,
Carry the banner until my words are read.
You are worthy.
You are strong.
You are loved.
You are not to blame.
This is for the victims whom no one defends. You are not to blame.
April May 2018
Eyes, why are you crying?
Lungs, why can’t you breathe?
Heart, why are you racing?
Stop! Oh, stop it, please!

I know I shouldn’t panic
There’s nothing I need fear
I’m safe and I’m protected,
But Terror cannot hear!

Worried parents
Soothing words
Scared. I’m scared as hell!

Heart. Racing.
Chest. Tight.
Crying.
Can’t explain.

Can’t breathe
Can’t breathe.
Can’t breathe!

And then it’s gone
April Sep 2018
In circles convoluted still
We poor dumb puppets turn;
The wind, a thief
Of voices, screaming
That which once was ours-
A shrieking cry more animal
Than man.
Time itself is dancing on
The puppet master’s strings.
April Aug 2018
The truth ripples,
wavers,
distorts.
Bowed and twisted by so many
Silver tongues.

Twisted is the glass we see though
Cloudy and hidden by turns
Trapping us in blissful ignorance.

Ignorance is not bliss
When you long for a truth
That no one wants to find.
They are blissful in their ignorance
April Mar 2018
A day stretches endless
A year but a blink
Of Mother Nature’s eye
April Jan 2018
A splash of noise
A crowded hall
A world of perfect
Or not at all

An empty room
A closed tight door
A bubble resting
On tiled floor

A place of talk
Of facts and dates
A place without time
For stop, or wait

A place of students
Hurrying past
Of teachers waiting
To start their class

A place where time
Is of the essence
Where nothing pauses
It’s haste’s quintessence
April Apr 2018
I pour my heart out on the page
My pain and anguish inky red
My anger black as dark as hatred
Shadows seeping creeping in
I tear my hair in screaming terror
None can see how young I am
Just a girl afraid of darkness
Shadows seeping creeping in
On the outside mask-like features
Smiling tell the world their lies
On the inside breaking cracking
Shadows seeping creeping in
So spin on world and leave me aching
What care you for who I am
Just a girl afraid of darkness
Shadows seeping creeping in
#pain #darkness #invisible  #shadows #afraid
April Jun 2018
How many times have I said the words?
Whispered them, shouted them
Silently inside,
Where only I can hear,
So nobody answers?
Help me! I’m not strong enough.
Save me, hold me close and safe!
Don’t you see how close I am
To breaking?
I am the vase on the edge of a shelf
In an earthquake.
April Feb 2019
As raindrops shatter on the walk
And water gilds the leaves
A sparrow huddles in the damp
Beneath the dripping eaves

It’s feathers, brown and white, drawn close
To keep the cold at bay
A silent bird awaits the dawn
That heralds coming day
April Dec 2017
A boat through starry skies
I row
In paths of time.
My fate I seek;
Remembered pain shall
Guide my course,
Yesterday’s woes.

A moon doth rise
Upon my life
Oh goddess pale,
Hear my cries!
I search for truth.

But waits she not;
Ne’er path she slows.
Oh frosty maiden!
Hear my woes!
But stops she not,
Nor ‘lists to me,
A boat
Upon a starry sea.
April Jun 2018
Remember that the world can love
Remember that the future’s there
Remember that you can succeed
If only you still live
Never stop fighting
April Jun 2018
A summer storm is raging far
Beyond the distant hills
Lightning flashes,
Fleeting glows,
As thunder rolls and thrills
In growling waves.

The radio is buzzing out its
warning to the world
“Be careful, all who venture forth,
For Heaven’s wrath.”

The sidewalks turn to rivers,
And our valleys now are ponds,
My garden serves as bathing space for families of frogs.

They’re not afraid.

And now that Thunder prowls away,
And Lightning follows, in her wrath,
I creep outside, where gentle rain
Soothes aching trees and grass.
Placid raindrops making art
On my flooded lawn.
April Aug 2018
An orb of fire hanging by a thread
From the heavens, straining towards the earth
Some comet frozen distant in the past,
A captive bound in time’s eternal dance.
Its partner ever spinning, spinning,
A silent counterpart to fire’s rage.
The sun sets in a pool of melted gold.
April Aug 2018
I dreamt a dream last night
That I was brave
That I could ask the questions
That I need to know

But I am weak
And scared
Of losing what I have if
I push too hard

In my dream I had courage
But dreams must end
And this was but a dream
April Feb 2018
In nightmares and in waking dreams
I see them standing there.
Their faces, they who never age,
Who’ve long been resting in their graves,
Surrounding me with love and with their loss.

“I’ve missed you, since you left me, dear,”
I long to say to them.
I never get to speak the words;
My tongue is stopped with tears.

They smile at me, beckon to me,
Never do they speak,
And while I stay here, trapped by love,
They slowly fade away.

Their memories are blurring now,
Half washed away by tears;
Their vibrant colors run to grey,
A rainbow of the years
April Aug 2018
She hides behind a wall
Away from half her soul
Denying all that is
That isn’t right.
She paints in monosyllables.
April Oct 2018
Love is comfort when he’s hurting
Love is solace when he grieves
Love will listen when he’s worried
And hear beyond the things he says  

Love will watch with pride and pleasure
As he learns to be a man
Love will catch him when he stumbles,
And support him as he grows

Love sustains me when I leave him
Love connects us even now
The love that binds us never severed
Short of death, or yet beyond
April Apr 2018
I am the poet behind the words
My fingers grasp the pen
My heart is bleeding out in phrases
For the sorrows that I see
April Jan 2018
Hopes and dreams
Will bear me up
To challenge each
New dawn.
And when the sun’s
Last rays have set
I’ll shake my fist
At fate.
April Nov 2020
Oh all ye travelers, hearken well,
this dreary night where shadows dwell
Forget your woes for now my friends
And hear now where my tale begins…

A land across the sea there was
In ages long ago
when dragons roamed the skies at will
and monsters walked below

And here a noble family dwelled
And nothing t’was they lacked
with many knights of stalwart heart
To guard them from attack

A laughing king, full fair and just
Set laws down from his throne
His lovely queen stood by his side
And made their house a home

And children fair, in numbers three
Ran dashing through their halls
And filled the castle’s stony walks
With joyous youthful calls

But woe befell their house in time
for such is true of all
when treachery did rear its head
within their royal hall

—————————————

One night when all the family slept
a knock was heard below
and through the glass there could be seen
a faint and ghostly glow

The moon was hidden well that night,
no fire burned without,
this light was not an earthy thing,  
of that there was no doubt

But no one saw this strange display
for all lay at their rest
and when at dawn the maids awoke they found they had a guest

a stranger sat outside their door,
a cloak drawn ‘round his form
and when they asked his business there
he spoke in tones forlorn:

“For many leagues I’ve walked by foot
and nary drink I’ve had
my throat is as the dessert dry
and in mere rags I’m clad”

The maids could see that this was true,
his voice was but a croak
a weakling child, scant in years
could fell him with a stroke

His clothing was bedraggled so
that places skin was bare
and all was grey and tattered rags
such no one could repair

he spoke again and begged the maids
that drink be brought to him
for surely else he would not live
and suffer death sore grim

In pity for this weakly man
who to their hearts did plead
the maids rushed back into the house
to fetch out honeyed mead

But as they left, a change occurred,
Though by none was it seen
The ragged man that once was there
was not as he had been

In that man’s place there stood a Fay
As tall and straight as trees
His hair of copper drifting ‘round
In chilly Autumn’s breeze

—————————————

Now I am sure you all must know
the tales of the fay,
those fairy folk who love to trick
and use us men as prey

Unbound by laws and moral codes
These Fay folk live apart
And those who’ve seen them all come back
Full strangely changed at heart

The Fay can be a flighty lot
Their moods like shifting clouds
One minute sunny, then the next
As cold as funeral shrouds

And here a member of that race
Stood waiting by their door
And on from hence their fates would be
Entwined for ever more

But in a blink the rags returned
The glamour strong and sure
And to the people’s human eyes
All things stayed as they were

When they came back they brought him in
To sit and drink and eat
And all the time suspected naught
Of who it was they’d meet

—————————————

They gathered ‘round in all good cheer
For they still knew him not,
And passed a merry time indeed
Un-wary of his plot

And after supper’s course had passed
With mead in heavy draughts
The stranger asked to entertain
With stories that he’d brought

They called together all the maids
And footmen of the house,
And even their liege-lord came down
With children and his spouse

They’d wrapped the stranger in a robe
And sat him by the fire,
And when he asked they brought to him
More mead and someone’s lyre

As he prepared to tell his tale
A hush fell o’er the hall
A strange expectant silence reigned
And cast them in it’s pall

And when he spoke no sound was heard,
Save for the stranger’s voice,
His tone as clear as piercing bells
On mornings filled with ice

He spoke of lands across the sea
Where wealth and magic rules
And then of dragons, fierce and strong
With hoards of gleaming jewels

But as he spoke a change occurred
Among the gathered throng
And any who were watching them
Would see
That something’s wrong

For few by few those listening
We’re drifting off to sleep
Their heads were tilting towards their chests,
In grips of slumbers deep

And even if someone had rung
A church bell in that hall
Nary a one would have awoke;
So deep was dreamland’s thrall

When all about were sleeping sound
The Fay rose from his chair
At long last free to carry out
The reason he was there

—————————————

He looked about the hall of forms
Slumped o’er in their chairs
And laughed in silence to himself
For fates that would be theirs

For one thing that they had not known,
Could not have understood
Was that he’d come to take their child
With him to Myrddin’s Wood

The girl he sought was loved full well
A princess of the land
A joy to all who heard her laugh
Or held her dainty hand

A child now no more than twelve
With many years to grow,
Who held a fate more perilous
Than anyone could know

She slept that hour across the hall
Surrounded by her kin
Unknowing of the danger posed
By one who they’d let in

The Fay walked forth across the floor
And stood there by her side
Gazing upon the silent girl
He had with magic plied

—————————————

He took her up into his arms
And wrapped her in a cloak
That had appeared from empty air
With chanted words he spoke

He turned away from all the folk
Who lay so still in sleep
They soon would wake, once he had left
No more in slumber’s keep

He whirled and left that silent room
Delighted in his heart
For everything would fall in place
Soon from this evening’s start

He left the castle through the doors
Of stoutest oak that stood
To keep invading armies out
And spare its people blood

Alas for them, no doors could stand
Before the wills of Fay
No earthly plan, though well devised,
Could keep their force at bay

Then Aethylon, so he was called,
A Fay lord in his right
Strode from the house and through the grounds
Into the chilly night

—————————————
#ballad #fairies #fantasy
April Aug 2018
Welcome, Traveler,
You need no longer fear;
This is the home of the wanderers
Too tired to go on.
You’re in good company here.
April Jan 2018
Old man time, now white with age,
Who holds the warps
And wefts of fate

Weaves a cloth of stars and moons
With fingers tired
And worn
April Mar 2018
If I had a poem
I’m my heart for every sob
For every stab of lonleliness
That I must feel anon,
Then I would be a poet
With a library to my name
And every comfort I could wish
Save you safe home again
April Feb 2018
A tear is but a raindrop
In a thunderstorm of pain.
The thunder is my rolling sobs,
The lightning, my angry cries;
A flash of light amidst the roiling skies.
April Sep 2018
How can I face the passing hours,
Years and days still slipping by?
How to confront the creeping seconds,
Measured now for those I love?
How to accept that time is flowing,
Sweeping past my outstretched palms?
The few who are left are slipping through my hands.
It’s so hard to know that they, too, will leave
April Apr 2018
So, to be, or not to be?
Well, what is it to be me?
Who can say, and who can know,
I am everywhere I go.
I am who I listen to,
I am everything I do,
I am what I think and feel,
All I know is not what’s real.
Who am I, and should I be?
What is it, really, to be me?
April Mar 2018
Someone that I cared for
Once asked my favorite word.
I didn’t have an answer then,
But now I do.

Tomorrow is a word that rings,
A bell whose sound we chase and try to catch.
Through the years we follow,
It’s echoes full of hope and full of fear.

Tomorrow makes no promises,
No warranties on joy;
An accident, a tragedy,
Could be beyond this night.

But though I know that this is true,
And sadness comes for all,
Tomorrow too could hold the door
For my future self

That joyful woman I hope to be
Once all is right that can be fixed.
And so I chase tomorrow’s ringing,
Clear and pure through the nights of time,


And I know that soon the night will end,
And she’ll wait for me at tomorrow.
April Feb 2018
When there seems not much to fight for,
Nor many left to fight,
When the dark is closing round us,
That is the time for light!

That is the time for courage,
From those both great and small,
That is the time for love and truth,
For those must save us all!

That is the time for honor,
For friendship's outstretched hand,
For kin to stand together,
One strong, united band!

So now that shadows threaten,
And hate destroys our peace,
Now fear and greed prevail,
Now, now is the time for these!

Now is the time, my comrades!
Now you must heed the call!
Now you must stand together,
Or we must surely fall!

So listen to me, comrades,
Remember my words this day:
Love and peace can triumph,
And drive this hate away!
Never lose hope; It's sometimes all that's left.
April Jan 2018
Impossible wishes ensnare my mind
And mournful tears drown reality’s view
While my heart still searches, trying to find
The one who was so clever and true

I dream that someday he’ll return to me
And my life would be what it was back then
But I know in my heart that it can’t be
And that I can never go back again

Yet still my silent vigil will I hold
To keep the ever pressing dark at bay
And keep my heart from all consuming cold
With the light of hope’s now faltering ray

And though my mind will tell me otherwise,
My cagéd heart believes it’s own sad lies
April Mar 2018
I see the deaths of a thousand trees
In stacks of paper that heavenward climb
And tell the stories of things long past
That the trees have seen

Is it only I who can see their lives,
The precious lives we’ve squandered here?
Is it only I who mourn the trees
Who gave their lives unwillingly
For the sake of knowledge?
Am I the only one who hears their cries?
The whispers of the leaves remain
And speak of loss
April Aug 2018
The sea lashes out in anger
Beating against the shore
Nothing stands in the face of the ocean’s wrath
April May 2018
Shakespeare said
To die- to sleep-
But sleep without a morning’s light

Hamlet said
He fears the dreams-
But dreams are what makes the night

And he spoke of
Wrongs, and suffering,
But wrongs without their right

And though Hamlet despaired,
And refused to go on,
Our joy is not out of our sight
April Jan 2019
When I am gone,
Don’t think of me.
Don’t mourn for me
Don’t weep for me.

I won’t be there
To turn away
The pain.

Some other arms would
Hold you tight,
Another’s voice would
Soothe your sleep;
And I will be
A million miles away.

So please,
Don’t miss me
    
When
       I’m
          Gone.
April Sep 2018
Light flashing
Pulse pounding
Heart racing
Caught

Time slows

Blue shirt
Kind eyes
Soft voice
Reprieve

We’ve done nothing wrong
He says
April Aug 2018
I am my hands and my feet
My arms and my legs
My torso and my spine
I am my eyes and my lips
My ears and my skin
I am my brain and
I am my heart
But who am I?
April Oct 2020
I’ve never had to think before now
How to say it
There’s never been someone
To say it to

It’s harder than it ought be
I think
It’s just three words, some lines and dots
Or sounds

It would only take a second
To tell him
But fear is staying my tongue
My hand

Are these words he wants to hear?
Will he leave?
I’m scared to take that step
Off the edge
Dear god not again
April Apr 2018
Don’t you worry darling,
Now’s not the time for fears;
Don’t you fret my darling,
For I will dry your tears.

Though the world may crumble ‘round us
And though the sky may fall,
Don’t be sad my darling,
For I’m not sad at all.

You’re all I ever wished for
And all I’ve ever loved,
You are my joy, my guiding light,
My sun in skies above.

So now that shadows threaten,
I’ll be your light in turn,
And if the world is ending,
Together we will burn.

— The End —