the cold, breeze
of the wind
that made your
hair become
a playful mess

the smile
from your lips
that showed
happiness
felt within

your clothes
hugging your
strong, tall
yet huggable
figure

all these
features
of you
that i came
to love

i took it
in a snap,
in the form
of a pictureー

a tangible memory,
frozen in time

step up
your *******
game.

i can see
through the
jealousy
that you
hide inside
of your heart.

don't you dare
get mad
at me,
for your envy
is as ugly
as your
egoistic bruise.

i won't
hesitate to
switch things up,
you underground,
with me
up above.

it all just went on-
    he asked her with,
    she accepted,
    while I broke.
it took me days,
    i kept seeing you
    in my mind, I'm,
    heartbroken and desperate.
we seemed like
    strangers to our,
    souls calling out,
    our lost chance.

my dearest child,
    the tears you've
    shed, now lay upon
    the earthy
    soil.
it has grown
    to make a
    beautiful and
    fragile
    soul.
your kindness may
    not be seen, yet
    fear not, for the
    light, shines through
    you.

she watches over
those who
plan carefully
and strategically
for the battle
that they
are about to
face within
and about.

overseer of
those pursuing
knowledge,
wit, and wisdom
scattered among
books or
in your everyday
life.

a goddess of
thorough thinking who
has always been
enabling victory
now influences the worthy
abundantly.

in the midst
of it all
despite the
foundation
being of
toxic ground

a flower
found its way
to bloom
after plentiful
struggles

i am
that flower

her body shines
and twinkles
under the moonlight.

her hair cascades
over the sheets
and into oblivion.

her hands bring forth
a beautiful melody
of pleasure
derived from pain.

back arching like the sunset
over the sparkling sea--

"come before me."

you lurk within
and stay between
the things
that i say
and even
the things
that i do.

you show up
whenever
i hold my standards
way too high
for others
yet give excuses
for when i
fail in the eyes
of the world.

you say that
you protect me
from the dangers,
but i say
that you're a child
who has been hurt
over and over
that you have
built walls
and a throne
that is false.

the darkness
is what we humans
tend to fear,
yet it an aspect
that lies within
every each and one
of us,
for we are all
souls craving
everything material
but nothing
spiritual.

my dear don't
    be afraid to
    take flight and
    call out for help
we will and
    have promised to
    protect you,
    on our word
a samurai will
    and never will he
    abandon his orders
    *to protect you

Folds, fur, creases and greases on your clothes
Have you had a nice breakfast?
No, no, it doesn't seem so.
You've had a bad day since you've risen from your bed.
Your hands are shaking and don't even notice it,
Probably because of the nicotine hidden in the left pocket of your jacket.
Ahh! Shut up! You were thinking! It's annoying!
Get out! Get out! I need to go to my mind palace!
Also, if you think that I'm a psychopath,
I'm just a high-functioning sociopath.
With your number! -smiles-

Oh, John Watson? You've got a limp from your last war from Afghanistan.
Your hand stays steady when you're suspicious or feel like you're being threatened.
Hmm, you like the battlefield, don't you, John?
Ahh, you can be my colleague! Come on, John!
Wait, what? Who are you?
The name's Sherlock Holmes and I live on 221B Baker Street.
And, I'm a consulting detective who uses,
*The Science of Deductions

from words you say,
    to the things that
    you do just
    to joke on me
they leave an
    unhealable scare
    etched upon
    my aching heart
a thousand feelings
    bottling up, inside
    of me,
    a time bomb

"Anak, bakit ayaw mo ba ngumiti sa mga larawan? Mahal ba ang presyo ng ngiti mo?!"

Opo, nay, ang sabi ko lamang sa loob ng kaisipan ko. Kasing mahal ng halaga ng abuso na ginawa mo sa damdamin ko.

North, East, West, South
Are full of nations
With no doubt
That are full of wonderful creations

There goes the Axis Powers and Allied Forces
That unite as one
To go through different and difficult courses
Or sometimes to have fun

But when it comes to declaring a war
These nations may get too carried away
Because they take it too far
That it leads them astray

But, they always know that they have to stay as friends
So that the world won't come to an end

(Please read the note below!)

mischief and such wit
  moony, wormtail, padfoot, prongs
  they're the marauders
and when the job's done
  wave your wand and just say this
  'mischief managed!' done
cleverness present
  but wasted on breaking rules
  yet used for the fun

waiting for a spark
    your eyes lock
    on my dark and
    hopeful ones waiting
for the right
    kind of love
    you'll someday give
    out to me

when i look at you
all the pain, worries and problems
slip away from me and
i can only feel your comfort and touch
i love it when you hold me close to you
because i feel so safe in your arms
as if you are protecting me from preying hands
you vowed to protect me
and you really did

remember the time when it started raining all of a sudden?
neither of us had an umbrella
but we didn't care
we just stayed close to each other and laughed about how crazy it was
being alone together in this rain
then i got cold
you smiled, took off your jacket and put it over me
i smiled sheepishly as my way to say thanks
for your orbs were looking right at me
and that's how i knew that you were in love with me

this connection that i am feeling
is it really meant to be?
are we really connected by the string of fate for us to be by each other's side?
the string may twist and tangle but it will never break
but, i feel so selfish as i think about this
'One, four, three,' you told me one time with a wink and a tinge of red on your cheeks
but, i tried to keep telling myself that the proof is all there
the proof was your words

you say that
you aren't
perfect or
maybe even
not enough
for me.

but i will
tell you
this:
you are
the reason
why i can
find hope
in every
single day
i wake up to.

you are
my Heather.

they say that time travelling is impossible
but then i thought of something
to make this case possible
and for the issue to disappear like nothing

you know of the time zones, right?
when i thought about it
that's when i knew it was somewhat right
and that's how an idea was lit

when we go to another country to slack
it has a different time to beat
it may be pulled some hours back
or pushed some hours forward in defeat

this is just an idea that popped up instantly
not yet read or heard by others
yet can i push myself to tell others constantly,
so that this idea can be no bother?

as small as i am to the world
i thought that the stars above me
saw me as a petty person as well
yet something inside me told me, "no"
these twinkling lights
that are not really in the color of white
reminded me to keep shining brightly

then i wished to be among the stars
to soar above the sky
to be with them as i wished
that gravity will reverse
so that i may touch the sky
don't forget the oxygen too
so that i may live to see the stars up close, with my very eyes

yet, the stars are only ***** of fire that have died a million years
as people say that those how my dreams and ambitions look like
from shades of orange to blue they are colored
yet i still wish to see them
they are dead like your dreams. someone once told me
how can you say that to a kid like me?

even if they are non-living things
they soothe me in the midst of the equilibrium of darkness
they are here for me
to lift up my mood, it is what the stars can do
yet i stand on the ground
looking up desperately while reaching to the sky
what is it that i can do to make me fly?

i sigh, not only because i know that i can't literally fly
but because i didn't know any other way to do so
then the sole of my shoes crunch beneath the ground
i felt myself walking towards my home
before i went it, i looked up to the sky
i breathe in and out before whispering to it
*i want to be the first to soar among you freely

"You're so ugly!"
But, God made me this way.
"You're stupid!"
What if I just don't know what that field of subject is about?
"You're so thin!"
You can't control my metabolism.
"You should eat more!"
I have a restrictive food intake disorder, you just don't know it.
"You don't know how to appreciate what's in front of you!"
I do know how to appreciate it. I just...
"You're so weird!"
At least I'm not crazy.
"No one will ever love you!"
Well, someone from above loves me unconditionally.
"You're so disrespectful!"
You don't even know how to respect me, right?
"You're so ungrateful!"
I.. I just don't know how to express my feelings at times.
"I hate you!! Go away!"
Okay then...

All the hate, all the pain!
I can hear these voices in my head again!
Will never stop pouring down for it is an endless pouring rain.
I can feel myself becoming like one of the madmen
Hey! Can you hear me?!
I'm slowly becoming transparent!
A person who you can never see,
Because you dismiss me as absent.
I need your love! I need a hug!
Please, notice me for once!
You're my only antidepressant drug!
For I am always in the permanent state of abeyance!
The burdens that I carry, you can never understand!
Sometimes a new problem may grow out of nowhere!
I don't even always have a helping hand!
And, my body starts to grow even colder...
You know how a static sounds so eerie, right?
How it can be somewhat emotional and scary at the same time.
The way it sound to your ears at night,
Will be the sound that you hear when you've seen me commit a crime.

The crime of locking myself away from you because you never seemed to care about me anymore.

I hate to admit that,
Even if I hate you right now,
To the degree that spells out,
"So much,"
I can't deny that,
I am still,
Inevitably still,
In love with,
You.

I am rejected by society
I am out of place when I am near people
I am called ugly by others
I am called weird by people who don't know me
I am called useless, worthless, a speck of dust lying on the floor, waiting to be thrown from garbage can to garbage can
Reality is now slipping from my fingers like a picture that is made of smoke
How should I last when my body is so weak that I may crumble away?

In the rain of my own tears I always go through
Without any umbrella or rain coat
I don't even know why I am still alive
Problem after problem, the pain never goes away
How do I even last through this awful storm?
Yet, it never floods, the rain just keeps pouring down
Down and right into my very soul
My soul that has been fed up for too long
Can no longer hold the sadness and pain that I've been hiding
My smiles are just fake, you see
I always wear a mask with a bright smile painted onto it
But, behind the mask, my cheeks are always wet because of the never-ending flow of my tears

People always ask me why I seem so sad when I am quiet
It's funny, really, on how you guys don't even know even if the answer is right there
The tears forming in my eyes, is the answer
No, they are not tears of joy, you idiot
Are you that stupid like an early human being from long ago?
Look at me. Crying right in front of your eyes yet you can't even sense it!
I am slipping quietly into the hole of eternal darkness
No, not eternal darkness, but oblivion

The reason why I am always feeling like this behind the mask that I wear
Is because you people told me that I cannot be more
How insenstive you creatures are!
Just because you are popular doesn't mean that you can bully right away
Just because you are older doesn't mean that you have the right to say that to me
You are starting to make me feel like a canvas waiting for its painter to paint life and color in to me
I feel so blank
I feel so ******
I feel so sad
Everything that I'm seeing right now is starting to turn grey, black and white
The colors of sadness, I call them
Because I am a book that is full of unnecessary writings that covers the content of my life
I am now called 'untitled'
For people didn't know which insult to go by me whenever I pass them at the corridors

you fell for the looks, but not for the happiness

memories
or the
personㅡ
which do
i really
even miss?

my heart,
it aches
for it
longs
affection
it once received

yet it knows
that you
took it
for granted

thus,
i conclude,
i only miss
the memories
i made with you
before
you changed