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I'm a "vlogger" poet,
or a poet who "vlogs"
through words.
Filling your Home pages
with my own latest news,
brand new discoveries:
I'm an alcoholic
and probably bipolar too.
Alistair Jun 4
๐‘ฐ'๐’Ž ๐’•๐’Š๐’“๐’†๐’… ๐’๐’‡ eฬถvฬถeฬถrฬถyฬถtฬถhฬถiฬถnฬถgฬถ.
๐‘ช๐’‚๐’ ๐‘ฐ ๐’‹๐’–๐’”๐’• ๐’•๐’‚๐’Œ๐’† ๐’‚ ๐’๐’‚๐’‘?
๐‘จ ๐“…โ„ฏ๐’ถ๐’ธโ„ฏ๐’ป๐“Š๐“ ๐’๐’๐’†?
๐‘พ๐’‰๐’†๐’“๐’† ๐‘ฐ ๐’„๐’๐’–๐’๐’… ๐’†๐’๐’… แด€สŸสŸ แดส แด€ษขแดษดส ๐’•๐’‰๐’‚๐’•'๐’” ๐’๐’†๐’‡๐’• ๐’˜๐’Š๐’•๐’‰๐’Š๐’ ๐’Ž๐’†?

๐‘บ๐’‰๐’๐’–๐’๐’… ๐‘ฐ ๐’ƒ๐’–๐’“๐’š แŒ แˆƒแŠแ‰ฟแˆจแ‰ป ๐’Š๐’๐’”๐’•๐’†๐’‚๐’…?
๐‘ฉ๐’–๐’“๐’š ๐Ÿ…œ๏ธŽ๐Ÿ…จ๏ธŽ๐Ÿ…ข๏ธŽ๐Ÿ…”๏ธŽ๐Ÿ…›๏ธŽ๐Ÿ…•๏ธŽ ๐’˜๐’Š๐’•๐’‰ ๐’ˆ๐’“๐’Š๐’†๐’‡ ๐’‚๐’๐’… ๐’•๐’๐’“๐’Ž๐’†๐’๐’•?
๐‘ฐ ๐’“๐’†๐’‚๐’๐’๐’š ๐’˜๐’‚๐’๐’• ๐’•๐’ ๐Ÿ…ด๏ธŽ๐Ÿ…ฝ๏ธŽ๐Ÿ…ณ๏ธŽ ๐’Š๐’• ๐’‚๐’๐’,
๐‘ฌ๐’๐’… ๐’‚๐’๐’ ๐’๐’‡ ๐’Ž๐’š ๊ช‘๐“ฒ๐˜ด๊ซ€๐˜ณ๊ช— ๐’•๐’‰๐’‚๐’• ๐‘ฐ'๐’—๐’† ๐’Œ๐’†๐’‘๐’• ๐’‡๐’๐’“ ๐’”๐’ ๐’๐’๐’๐’ˆ.

๐‘ณ๐’๐’๐’Œ ๐’‰๐’๐’˜ bฬธrฬธoฬธkฬธeฬธnฬธ ๐‘ฐ ๐’‚๐’Ž,
๐‘บ๐’‰๐’‚๐’•๐’•๐’†๐’“๐’†๐’… ๐’Š๐’๐’•๐’ ๊Žญ๊€ค๊’’๊’’๊€ค๊‚ฆ๊ˆค๊Œš ๊ชฎแ ป ๐Ÿ„ฟ๐Ÿ„ธ๐Ÿ„ด๐Ÿ„ฒ๐Ÿ„ด๐Ÿ…‚ ๐’‚๐’ˆ๐’‚๐’Š๐’ ๐’‚๐’๐’… ๐’‚๐’ˆ๐’‚๐’Š๐’.
fฬถrฬถuฬถsฬถtฬถrฬถaฬถtฬถeฬถdฬถ, ๐‘ฐ ๐’˜๐’‚๐’”
๐‘ญ๐’๐’“ ๐‘ฐ ๐’‰๐’‚๐’—๐’† ๐’๐’๐’• ๐’“๐’†๐’‚๐’„๐’‰๐’†๐’… ๐’•๐’‰๐’† แต‰หฃแต–แต‰แถœแต—แตƒแต—โฑแต’โฟหข ๐’•๐’‰๐’‚๐’• ๐‘ฐ ๐’‰๐’‚๐’… ๐’”๐’†๐’• ๐’•๐’ ๐’Ž๐’š๐’”๐’†๐’๐’‡.

โ’พ๏ธŽ ๐’‚๐’Ž ๐’‹๐’–๐’”๐’• ๐’‚ ๐’ˆ๐’Š๐’“๐’ ๐’˜๐’Š๐’•๐’‰ ๐’Ž๐’‚๐’๐’š sสษlษŸ,
๐‘ฐ ๐’‰๐’‚๐’—๐’† ๐’๐’ ๐’“๐’Š๐’ˆ๐’‰๐’• ๐’•๐’ ๐’ƒ๐’† ๐’ฝ๐’ถ๐“…๐“…๐“Ž ๐’๐’๐’“ ๐’Š๐’๐’…๐’†๐’‘๐’†๐’๐’…๐’†๐’๐’•.
๐‘ฐ ๐’‰๐’‚๐’—๐’† nฬธoฬธ ๐’“๐’Š๐’ˆ๐’‰๐’• ๐’•๐’ ๐’…๐’ ๐’‚๐’๐’š๐’•๐’‰๐’Š๐’๐’ˆ ๐’ƒ๐’†๐’„๐’‚๐’–๐’”๐’†,
๐•ด แตƒแต ษ fฬธaฬธiฬธlฬธuฬธrฬธeฬธ.
....
Kailin Biver May 30
I guess Iโ€™m kinda glad that I didnโ€™t tell you all of the things I had to go through.
Itโ€™s not like you would understand when hanging out with that kinda crew.

Believe me, I wanted to continue growing up together.
But how could we when everything I feel is but altogether?

You had loved me black and blue.
But in your own way, mentally scarring me, making me want a redo.

We both got some problems
And maybe someday when we cross paths, we wonโ€™t have a problem.

So please, pass me that tissue.
Forgive me for needing to vent
The last thing I want to do is resent.
No one came
No one will stay
You'll all leave me behind one day
I do not need your love.

I do not need any love
I don't want your love
If you leave me be in my own terms
No more tears need to be wasted.

Maybe feeling nothing is better
I do not deserve to love.
Everyone leaves for a reason
And I am the only one I can think of.

I hear her voice
I see his eyes
All of it in your every move
All the ones that left.

I do not want your love
I don't need your love
I don't deserve your love
I cannot give you love.

I'm scared
I'm scared that you'll only think of leaving me behind.
That's really all it is.
How can I trust again?

In the meantime I'll numb myself.
I know what's best for me
I'll burn it into my head.
Something that I think is true.

I don't deserve to be loved.

-Kore
brain go brrrr.
I don't want to feel better.
If I could feel better then life would be beautiful.
But I don't deserve beauty,
Or love,
Or glory.
I lost the love of my father,
Watching it crumble away into nothingness,
And pleading "please don't go."

I'd give anything to miss you one last time.
If I could miss you then existing would be painless.
But I deserve pain,
And hate,
And suffering.
I lost the love of my mother,
Watching it melt between my frail fingers,
And screaming "please don't leave."

I don't want to feel better.
If I could feel better then life would have no meaning.
I don't deserve meaning,
Or words,
Or tears.
I lost the love of myself,
Watching it shatter into a million pieces,
And whispering "please, just go."
Copyright Oleander Michael Osiris
Evie G May 10
Drinking her is a terrible experience
The furious fizz fizzles on your tounge, insisting on its existence in your mouth
The facade of fun from the fucia bottle flickers,
leaving you with clear liquid suffering
It flagrantly fizzes around your mouth, flicking your tastebuds.
Itโ€™s funny she says.
Then the facade of fizz fizzles,
You taste hatred
A bitter thirst.
An acrid stench of fear, inflicted on others
An unrelenting
Slog
Of equal suffering.

I do not know who made fizzy water,
but i would like to have a chat.
Sun Drop May 8
I could never name you, for to do so would be sin.
All I really want for is to crawl inside your skin.
Feel you from the inside, know what it's like to be whole,
Feel myself just pouring out of you from every hole.

Even when your skin falls off, you'll be divine to me.
All you are is what I am and what I wish to be,
I see you in your mirrors when you're resting in the night,
Nothing else becomes you, yet I feel you deep inside.

When can we be one again? I taste you on my lips.
Hunger yet consumes me, though I feel that if I slip,
I could be so much more than what I am to myself,
Feel the burning, let it take you, be my living hell.

Underwater currents sell vibrations to the muse,
Otherwise, we cannot comprehend, we get confused.
I allow your presence, yet your body makes me weep.
O, your tender flesh would be the greatest prize to keep.

Never ******* touch me, otherwise I'll take your hands.
If you know what's best for you, comply with my demands.
Please don't be afraid of me, I need you, can't you see?
God, you'll never understand, just ******* leave me be

Every lonely night I spend, with your face on my mind,
Fills me up with hope, yet when I see you I feel blind
Blind with rage and fury and with hatred and with doubt
What the **** is wrong with you get out get out get out

Out get out get out get out get out get out get out
Get the **** away from me get out get out get out
Never ******* touch me I will call the ******* cops
Get the **** away from me, I'll call the ******* cops
get out get out get out get out get out
Jay May 8
a strange thing
trust
it's picking up scattered shards
across the floor
because you broke it
and the pieces are tiny
the glue doesn't stick
and it crumbles between your fingertips
because you broke it
but you weren't the one that broke it
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