It is the dead of night.
Ha, what a coincidence. I can hear the hounds howling in the far off distance, I can hear the traffic, I can hear my own heart beating.
.
It is chilly.
The air is crisp, and in defense of that it is mid October and I am sitting in the balcony with hardly anything on.
.
It is eleven.
My mind is once again at war, the same battle that it has been fighting for a very long time now. The same conflicts, the same prolonged struggle of the mere mortal human soul.
.
It is silent. It is tranquil. It is still.
The traffic is gone, even the grasshoppers have decided to take a break. I'm down 5 cups of coffee and I can see what I hear and hear what I see.
.
It is time.
You must be wondering "What about his heartbeat?"
Well theoretically, I was only 2 stories short.
But only in theory.
Trust me, I checked.

Beware.
For a day will come when the raindrops will be outnumbered.
A day when all that is mighty will be prevailed.
When all that is a tear will shed more pain than the markings on the walls of her vessel.
When all that would matter is the little life in her hands.
Beware.
When she will give birth to herself.
Beware.
For a day will come when her cages will rattle.
Beware.
A day when the barbed wires won't matter.
Beware.
when she will be more than just defiant.
Beware of the day she will not remain silent.
**- Aks

You'd make a really nice submissive.
Oh, I can only imagine. You being blind folded & *******. Thoroughly depending on your senses to guide you.
To calm you.
As a feeling of adventure and potential danger lurks inside of you. You feel sinfully tempted. You feel bad.
You want to taste blood.
But you'd be willing to give into it. No?
Let yourself be dominated.
For the night. For the other. For oneself. For the moment. For the sin.
Think.
Not knowing where he would touch you.
What part of you will be blessed first?
Where would he settle and take refuge?
And until so you would eagerly wait for his gentle, soft and devilish touch upon your skin to devour you.
You would wait. Wouldn't you?

You altered the odds,
Derived a stormbound probability.
Loved a lone wolf,
Oh goddess, you filled the void in me.
You dwelled in me,
You took another sip from my soul.
As I was left hypnotized by your palliating laughter that gently devoured me whole.
.
My demons never feared your Gods, but something about the curve of your lips changed that about them.
.
I am a deity.
I worship a goddess.
I wanted someone to love.
Wanted someone to call my own.
Someone to unleash this intense and unconditional devotion towards.
.
You left me indifferent to my sufferings.
Made me look beyond the same shortcomings that withered me over time and time again.
And for that I thank you.
.
I now seek you.
All of you.
I want each and every part of you to be relished and savored by me.
To let the only scent left behind be mine.
Let the only one you crave be me.
Only thing you desire, my presence.
I wish upon stars to hold you, and let my skin burn by your touch.
Let the words formed by your tongue fall short as I taste their origins.
Much as the creator leaves me.
Upon the tragedy of the test posed to us.
But don't let distance of our hearts be measured by the inches our lips seem to resist.
Instead by the mountains we are willing to overcome.
We are free, we are wild and we are rebellious.
Born for another time, born for another dimension, born for one another.

I like being the dominant.
I like to tie my submissive up.
I like to play with her.
Tease her. Please her. Destroy her.
Until she breaks.
I like to tie her up and run my fingers at the bend of her curves, explore her body & bite those seraphic lips as I taste their cherubic juices.
I prefer being intimidating and rough.
I will place a blade at your throat, to remind you how we are all mortal beings indulging ourselves in the most oldest of rituals in the history of mankind.
Kamasutra.
Yet, I'll treat you like you're the only one.
The one I cherish, love, hold close.
The one that I've got shackled in my embraces.
No one else will come close to the attention that I will give to you.
No one.
I'll be your slave even though you're my submissive.
I'll make you breathe hard.
I'll make you moan.
I'll make you mine.
I'll worship you, oh goddess.
I'll worship you.
**- Aks, // Sins of the blood.

It was when I realized that I would never be able to intoxicate you with myself, that the glass broke.
When I found out that I would never be able to replace the toxics that you like flowing oh so lovingly down your gentle throat.
That I would never be able to addict you to the drugs that I claim to be, as that is not in my hands.
That I would never be able to explore your mouth, while soothingly dripping down from your lips while you let me play with your tongue.
That I would never be able to accomplish what a glass of ***** could.
Oh, how much do I ache to be that.
A weakness.
The one you visit in your need for courage.
In your times of sorrow and happiness.
A constant. A liability.
Something you just can't resist.
Someone to make your cold soul feel intimidated.
Because honey, wouldn't it be something to be the one to make your insides burn?
**- Aks, Naked Emotions

Dreams are beautiful things.
Memories of past's fights,
Hope of a future light,
For a tomorrow so bright.
.
Thus we must work together.
To save our imagination before it rots.
Go out flaunting our true colors
and achieving the dreams we all sought.
.
The fell deeds of men
can be forgotten, words can not.
For they are forever etched immortal.
That's the power of dreams and thoughts.
**- Aks & Vergil.

That's the thing with humans. We now no longer believe in the existence of simpler things. As we grow up we realise that everything has depths. We are so very surrounded by such things that we have forgotten how simple life actually is. It's sad how people get angry at minute matters but don't even care to smile at the beautiful little things around them.
We've forgotten how it's the little things that matter, how there is so much more to life than just paper.
Whether it's your answer sheet or the currency you use. It's not at all complicated to be honest.
We've just forgotten. It's all very simple actually. Leave aside everything that frustrates you and take a sip of that nice chilled glass of your favourite wine or a nice warm bath or just a little glance up at the sky from your rooftop to get you going.
Get a reality check.
Do what makes you happy.
Let your happiness be more than just momentary.
Let it be reflected from your soul.
**- Aks, Naked & Human.

Into the oblivion, regret is all he sees,
This is not who he is nor who he wants to be.
In all the truths and in all the lies,
Alone he stands in the rain, a lonely guy.
Not a soul can hear him scream nor hear him cry.
Alone he stands and alone he dies.
.
Time and time again I'm brought back to these halls.
So sore full the pain and I've been through it all.
As hidden as the faithfulness of the stars,
So everlasting are those ungrateful scars.
.
Everyone that I know is as much reckoning,
I know it's me even hell is beckoning.
I guess this is the moment, now is the time.
I can feel the vines of darkness taking over my mind,
Indecisively making it's way out of harm and out of sight.
But, god almighty. I ain't leaving this easy, not without a fight.
.
Already dead no more can I die,
I guess it's about time I went back to the dark side.

- Aks, *Old Diaries.

"Hah. I wish I was an alcoholic. So every now and then I could remind you all of the things that I've done for you.
All the pain & hardships that I had to go through. All the sacrifices that I had to make.
Just to have all of my expectations torn apart by you.
I wish I could twirl my whiskey the same way you twirl me with your fingers. I wish you would realised just how lucky you are.
But out of everything I wish you'd realise all of those things by yourself.
If you'd take some of your dear time out of your own problems and maybe, just maybe ask me how my day was. Cause right now I'm on the brink of going back to that 'dark' place. A point where one would consider me twisted and deranged,
The worst kind of person you could find.
Oh, how I wish you would realise every little thing that I've done and consider me more than just an option.
Don't try to deny that.
All of this time I've been nothing but committed to you.
If only you'd have realised it much sooner, I wouldn't have to leave.
All those nights when you were alone and you'd call me up and I'd try my best to be there on the line with you. All those times when you needed someone and I'd text you back in just a few minutes no matter where I was or what I was doing. All those nights I'd make sure you didn't go to bed upset. All those times I fought with people I loved & cared for, for you. All those times I did things for you without you knowing.
All those times I tried not to love you.
I want to let you onto so many things but all you give me is disappointment and heartbreaks and I can not tell you these either because I want you to figure these out yourself, how much it is that you're hurting me, and how far it is that I am willing to go for you.
I don't want to tell you these things and force you to do things for me.
I am tired of being a shadow.
I am tired.
I am tired of you.
I wish I had another toxic to help me gulp you down other than yourself."
**- Aks, Alcoholic //Naked Emotions.

When we walked our way into the night, I expected a galaxy to be laid out for us, bestowing a universal mistletoe for us.
But there we were, counting whatever little bright spots we could find. Well, at least until I looked upon at you.
Star filled eyes.
Gods had something else planned in for me.
I was finally gazing at those holy celestial bodies. As they orbited around your pupils and left me shaken. Yes, shaken.
What kept me elated was the fact that you were there with me.
But that evening only those lonely hands could meet, and not lips.
But I swear I would've stayed a lifetime there if I could.
***, I'm some serious **** and you got a nice derrière.
- Aks, Interstellar Interconnection

"Paint me a dead body tonight". When you paint you are at your utmost emotional level. There is absolutely nothing you care about other than getting that image that's in your mind on the piece of canvas. That image that is haunting your mind and will continue to do so until you lay it out on that heavy duty plain-woven-fabric.
It's like when you paint you don't feel anything.
Not the hunger.
Not the fatigue.
Not the thirst.
Cause that's when you pour your true feelings and emotions out and sketch and color and oh my, darling do you paint.
You have a gift.
Cause when you paint it's not the body which is making the art, it's the soul. So tonight, let your soul out once more. Let your body - a mere cocoon - be left behind. Fly away one more time tonight, my love.
"Play with my **** & bare canvas,
Play well with my fear & fright.
Sketch me another ******, honey.
Paint me another dead body tonight."
-Aks, Paint me a dead body.

You ask why and innumerable thoughts traffic in my mind rebelling to come out, to give you a piece of themselves.
But, do you really deserve it?
Do you have that right to know?
Is it true that you, a mere human - all skin, blood and bones deserve even a scent of the misery that I bestow?
All I am is scared.
Frightened to be vulnerable, afraid at the thought of being judged by the one I trusted, and terrified to lose them.
So promise me you would not leave, and prove it. Stay.
Gaze at the stars with me while we drive away all through the night.
Imprint me in yourself.
Believe me, trust me & love me.
Even when I'm pointing a gun at you.
Even when I ****, ****** or slaughter.
Even when you think I have changed.
Don't.
Don't believe that.
'Tell me about my origins,
teach me of my past.
Enlighten me my virtue,
and firework my path.'
But don't you dare leave the passenger seat.
For I will come back from hell if I had to, to hunt you down, while being what you feared I wouldn't. A nightmare.
So do not lie.
Do not break any promises.
Do not walk away from our drive.
Our drive.
Or I'll skin you alive.
Maybe I'll marinate you, cook you, season you & have a fancy dinner as well.
All of this while dining underneath the stars.

Skin* crawling silence, everytime we'd draw close.
.
she always knew how much she could wound me, what a devilish threat she posed.
.
we knew no language, but the one our eyes discovered every second, hour or day.
.
how she would jaunt her way through me and take away the words I'd try to say.
.
her eyes. oh, they taunted all that I ever had faith in, all that I ever believed.
.
I discovered devotion in them, there was nothing more I'd wanted to achieve.
.
and yet she must never know all that I want for her. all that I want us to be.
cause, the rejection would be something no painkiller would ever heal..
**- Aks, HeArt.

"Play with my **** & bare canvas,
Play well with my fear & fright.
Sketch me another ******, honey.
Paint me another dead body tonight."

Some day, I hope we are laying on the grass gazing up at stars and you tell me everything that has ever hurt you and why you hurt yourself. You just let it all out. You will know it's that day when you call me up & ask me to listen cause I promise to hear you out with nothing but my silence around. A day when you don't hold back your tears. When you don't mind a never-ending hug, or me holding you. A day when you keep everything inside till you see me and then let it all out at once because you know I can pick up the pieces, arrange them and let them be whole again. I hope I provide you with comfort like no one else can and that all your scars fade away. When  you can lay your head on my chest and smile or cry for whatever reasons that maybe.. All of this while still gazing at the stars.
**- Aks, Naked Emotions.

I want to be drugged. Not by any chemical or medicine. But, by a person. Like an addiction.
I want to be assured of them never leaving.
I want to be assured of them understanding.
I want to be assured of them never taking advantage of the fact that I would reciprocate.
I want them to believe me.
I want them to trust me.
Accept me. Still love me.
I want someone to be sad when I am gone for good. Like the kind of sad that could **** a person. That is what I want.
I want them to appreciate little things.
I want them to do stuff for me.
I want them to share everything with me. Everything.
I want them to be there when I need them.
I want to give them sweet kisses in places no one's but they've seen. I want them to argue with me. For as long as it's me they're fighting with.
I want to kiss them, hold them and cherish them.
I want them to be drunk and drugged on me.
Because somehow I end up doing the same.
I want to be selfish.
I want them to bump into me someday.
I want them to exist.
I want them to be mine.
I want them.
**- Aks, //All I Want.

A night unlike another,
Just a guy, just a girl.
Medical was her dream,
Dreams that could fill the world.
She was a busy girl,
In a society that hardly cared.
Got on the wrong bus,
They sat in front, paid the fare.
.
She was molested, assaulted & *****.
She was brutally murdered. So was the truth.
Thrown off on a sidewalk, not one soul waved an glance. Hardly, a person who helped. Only those who stared and looked.
.
The nation was outraged, the public was on the streets.
The name was one, the girl united us.
Gave us a motive, while her mother weeped.
.
That one night was more barbaric than ever,
None that the words of a writer could express.
What happened after was a movement,
About time our country finally repressed.
.
Call all the politicians, call the officials.
I being a man in such a nation will not, I repeat. WILL NOT TOLERATE ANY OF THIS.
I demand justice, I demand my mother, my sister, my females friends to feel protected. I want them to rest assured whenever then step out in night, I want them to be comfortable and happy in whatever they wear. They should not be considered as objects. NO. They are what MADE you. Know that, Remember that & Respect that.
**- Aks.

I knew a girl who liked to draw,
She drew pictures that no one saw,
She was most artistic late at night,
In the bathroom, out of sight
She kept a secret no one knew
She didn't tell a soul and her gallery grew,
Her drawings were different, no paper or pen.
But needed a bandage every now and again,
We stood by the river under the stars,
She rolled up her sleeves and showed me her scars,
She felt embarrassed and looked at her shoe,
I rolled up my sleeves and said, "I draw too".

She came, she conquered.
Thoughts of love wandered,
Was she doing it right or was she doing it wrong?
Why doesn't any love of hers last long?
for I knew the unspoken truth, I couldn't deny.
cause I was the only one, who had tasted her venomous lies.
Those succubus's eyes.
**- Aks.

Do not come to me with closed doors.
Nor with an escalator that only runs down from heaven.
I want to be your addiction.
Let me be the reason for the curve your lips make,
When they smile, when they grin, when they kiss.
I want to invade you, help you escape, like you do when you light a bud.

Do not come to me with closed doors, I tell you again.
Nor with an escalator that only runs down from heaven.

I seek nothing but your love, your true self, that randomness.
That creeps out upon us like a seven of eleven.
**- Aks.

I'm just another note, in your symphony.
Grab me by my throat, have me trembling on my knees.
You're just a chain smoker,
I'm a Pack of Cigarettes.
I cross the line & lean over, nothing I regret.
.
You tighten the strings, make another sound.
Play a rhythm, and just keep smoking around.
And with every noise, your eyes they shine brighter.
Cause the only hand you need is the one with the lighter.
.
Now your buds are on the ground.
You wonder what went wrong?
Your chords were right, & so was the tone.
.
I knew karma, couldn't harm her.
But, this time it's going down.
Cause what goes around...
...must come back around.
- **Aks, Chainsmokers & Symphonies.

He can't seem to go on,
He doesn't seem too fine.
No one seems to notice
the Demons in his Mind.
.
He doesn't seem to care much,
He doesn't have much time.
You better take a good look,
Cause this will be his last crime.
.
He won't show his pain,
Cause no one seems to get.
He's just like another,
With Demons inside his Head.

- the boy who writes, Aks.

They say that this world is a cruel place.
But, I'm sorry. I'd beg to differ.
Yes, the fast lane doesn't really appeal to me either.
For it is the slow lifestyle of a traveller that I prefer.
.
I am tunnelled to demand adventure.
Through mountains, forests & deserted lands.
For, through my vision I seek nothing but...
The embrace of warm welcomers with folded hands.
- Aks

With those bulletins aligned, we started our quest.
And a picture attached to the message I had once sent.
It was the day I had set my eyes upon you, my sweet.
That I'd exclaimed to myself - She's out of your league.
.
So ravishing were those lines your eyes drew,
It was the hard faced reality
that made me ponder what was true?
But, with our bated breathes and a smile or two.
We lead our own world with an example,
Cause that's just how we do.

The odds were against them
As it was their fate on a cliff, that dangled.
It was the desire for passion & the need to unite.
Cause, she was the devil and he was an angel.
.
The world had mistaken their odd identities.
For they were one since time unknown.
Her's was the rhythm to his symphonies.
His breath, her kiss, his sin, her moan.
.
I could hardly say some more.
Theirs was the truest of alliance
For both were truly in love
It was each other they were thoroughly reliant.
Upon.

Don't let the persistent pressure of fitting in ruin you.
Don't ever let them, who only matter for today destroy what you could have tomorrow.
You, my darling. Could have the world right where you stand.
But, do not let the questions of 'What if' ever let you down in regret and sorrow.
.
You're special, not realising what you have is nothing less than God's Gift.
You adore what is gentle. And you do it with pride.
You must be too used to the way you are, so notoriously modest.
For you are beautiful, ***. So go out and flaunt your true colours and stripes.
- Aks

Humans feed on greed,
Take what they need,
Pray for no deeds,
Hate what they breed.
.
They spread the word of love & peace.
That's all they teach.
But, do we as humans ever practice what we preach?
.
Empty houses, closed doors.
Blood stains on the floors.
Lost innocent children with no clothes,
Or more, Hearts shattered to the core.
.
Wars destroy what we make.
Families, children, people at stake.
Why is it hate & war that we wage?
Turning everything in existence to dust, debris & carnage.
.
Them bullets over words.
Life donated to the dead.
Save me lord, don't
Let the blood run red.
- Aks

Silence engulfs our bated breaths,
Under the soft moonlight,
In the veils of the night,
We are together.
Tense yet relaxed,
My mind is tense as a bow,
My being is relaxed as the arrow which knows it will hit its target.
We are wilder than any beast.
We move in closer.
I relish your lips,
The sweet taste of your mouth,
Tongues lost in a passionate frenzy.
My arms draw you closer to me,
Trying to make you one with me.
I dare not let go, even for once,
I want to lose myself in your embrace.
Boldly, I Kiss the Curves of your Neck,
Slightly marking you with my teeth.
You, who put me in Conflict with myself,
Have reduced me to a Wolf.
Your clothes, are impair my Lust.
With swift movements, they are reduced to dust,
As I relish the Beauty of your pale skin.
This is wrong, but it makes me love you more.
I do not want to do this.
Yet I defile your lovely skin with Impure kisses,
My fingers"" tracing the ways of your *flesh.
I might hate myself in the morning, but tonight I'm all yours.
I whisper sweet nothings in your ears,
As we pause to draw breath in between our kisses.
Yet we scarcely draw apart.
This moment, this eternity is too short for me.
The lewd sensation of your skin against mine.
Sets my senses on fire.
I am burning, fading away.
Remember to wake me when I am lost in you.
As we do the rites of love,
The ones which man made sacrilegious so long ago,
Forgive me if I cannot find the words.
I cannot transliterate pleasure.
Yet as dawn breaks,
You slip out of my embrace.
You are a goddess, a dream,
Not for me to touch.
- Anonymous

Just an equation,
A Simple theorem.
A little misbehaviour,
Outside the decorum.
.
I add and provide,
Hoping we never divide.
At the geometry, I stare
Just a mindfuck of a square.
.
A slight cross multiplication,
To bond upon this attraction.
To help develop the postulates.
Of your mere subtraction.
.
I integrate & derive,
It's the formulae I'm deprived
Of. The questions always lead to me and you.
I always end up in my four sided cube.
- Aks, in math classes.

Into the night, she left everyone gasping.
Who could this be?
A Diamond from Mud.
Her beauty & smile left me asking.
Was she out for love?
Or was she out for Blood?
- Aks

A night so sinfully black,
When you took me out for a walk.
The stars gazing upon our inner calms,
Peeping into us, winking as we talk.
.
I sneak up behind you,
Lift you high. Hold you tight.
I drop you into my arms.
With a soft landing, after the flight.
.
I put you down,
And back out as I take a bow...
(Incomplete)

You can call it love,
While you leave me here in pieces.
You might try to push it away,
But it'll keep on increasing.
the night calls it passion, this
Thing, it doesn't ceases, love.
Cuz Jesus, that's just how it is.
- Aks

The days are numbered.
As the grey falls upon us,
With every other mind wondering
You tear me down like a succubus.

With your elegant, mystical being,
And my prudence as I believe what I'm seeing.
You dwell well in silence, hiding in the shadows.
Hiding a smile behind that askance, a laughter that carols.

But, I am courageous, though.
Willing to take that leap.
I just need you to know, love.
That I have no strings on me.
- Aks

I write this down one last time, to let you know.
To right what wrong I did, before I let you go.
To have you believe me even though you don't.
You'll be the most perfect, love. Even though I won't.
.
I literally want you to trust me when I ask you to love me.
I want you to realise that there's nothing that we can't be.
I want you to see the beautiful stubborn girl that I see.
I want you to feel what ever is this feeling that I feel
.
.
You can call it love,
While you leave me here in pieces.
You might try to push it away,
But it'll keep on increasing.
the night calls it passion, this
Thing, it doesn't ceases, love.
Cuz Jesus, that's just how it is.
- Aks

First sight on that beautiful mind,
she had me wondering,
And it breaks my heart,
to see such sweet sweet soul thundering.
.
And so I let it go.
As she climbs onto me.
I let her do her thing,
cause that's just how I be.
.
And with kisses to my cheeks.
So close we be yet so afar.
She left me asking myself,
How could I love with no heart?
.
And so she shares her bits with me,
completing me through
with only words to express ourselves,
'cause that's just how we do.
- Aks