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Jack Jenkins Dec 2016
Love has abandoned you and I
Not a one to lie by our side
What reason to carry on?
When all alone we are?

Is a cut wrist better than a cut heart?
I can assure you it isn't
Why?

"Loneliness is a part of our experience and if we are looking for relief from loneliness in friendship or relationship, we are only going to frustrate the friendship. Friendship, camaraderie, intimacy, all those things, and loneliness live together in the same experience..."
Written 28 February 2016... love can ****
Jack Jenkins Mar 2017
I think it's about time I
faced all of my devils
that I buried so deep.

I think it's about time I
woke up from this slumber
I have cast upon myself.

The man in the mirror is
so different from the man
I have always strove to be.

I'm done with maybe's
& want to's
& wish I's
& just am's

I'm going to accept the darker
pieces of my soul I kept locked
and buried away.

I lose myself in my lusts
but I never lose my care
for those who I love.

I get swallowed up in
agonies too great to understand
but I never will end it all.

I have the greatest
friends in the world
who understand why.

Thank you all for your
love and support you give
for forgiving me when I get carried away.
Thank you so much to those who meet me where I'm at. You all know who you are and I love you very deeply. <3
Jack Jenkins Apr 2017
Love
What to say?
I painted my life
with love entirely
so I burn in flames
I die to everyone
give everyone
and I die
in love
Hopefully this is unconventional. I've never had a particular style, and never tried to write conventionally. Haha
Jack Jenkins May 2019
Lamenting the light that has left this domicile/
Love has lain down never to rise again/
Lost in the liquid anguish of empty bottles/
Lust bid farewell in a rose stained casket/
Laced in black with pale skin never to touch again/
Loneliness holds me close to her/
Lurid faces meet my peaceful sleep/
Loss is the one thing I know I have/
Life's lyrics looted and left barren...
//On desire//
All these mix together and I can't tell the difference between them anymore...
Jack Jenkins Jan 2020
I miss you like the desert sands miss the lapping waves of the sea
That childlike sparkle in your eyes as you laughed with me
Our lives were a destiny not meant to be
But it was the only future I cared to see

I spend my days, hours, minutes, and seconds as if it didn't matter
But in the moments between time and space I am with you
Could it be called love if I didn't know what I was doing?
I made my confession to walls when it should have been to you...

Clarity always seems to cloud the mind, one way or another
Because the clarity that speaks only speaks of pain;
It hurts to say that it hurt to stay; It hurt to leave and it hurt to hate
Hating her hurt far more than any rejection of hers

Words cannot find the feelings I want to describe
After all, these are just love notes left behind...
//on her//

Speaking on tear-blotted pages and smudged ink...

Sorry for switching between first and third person so much... I often do so when visiting her in my mind...
Jack Jenkins Apr 2017
I would rather have your heart for just one day
                                  than have a million diamonds and waste away
Jack Jenkins Dec 2016
Sunlight falls with you here
And becomes lost in your beauty
The stars are jealous of how you shine
Indeed, your light is more softly beautiful
Recognized in the reflection of my unworthy eyes
Everything is brighter with you in my life
Written 20 February 2016... why does love never last?
Jack Jenkins Dec 2016
Withering away and fading,
This game I'm tired of playing,
It's only been you I've been craving,
Love is what I'm trying to be saying.

Beach ***** fall down,
Like I fell for you,
Cuz' you're my crown,
I want you to know it's true.

So here I am on a knee,
Begging for you to see,
That I love you, I love you.

So here I am on a knee,
Begging you to see,
That I love you, I love you,
Baby come to me.
Written 28 March 2016
Jack Jenkins Dec 2016
La dee da doo,
I'm in love with you.
La dee da doo,
I'll stick like glue.

Lee lee la la,
You make me haha.
Lee lee la la,
Let's never say ta ta!

Zoop a zee,
Will you kiss me?
Zoop a zee,
My love, don't you see?
Written 2 April 2016
Jack Jenkins Dec 2016
Holding the skull, trying to see the soul
But the sunken eyes, nothing they behold
This darkness in me it feels so cold
The darkness in me is starting to show

Yes, I'm a skeleton at heart
No flesh or organs in me
Stare into these eyes, you will see
The shadows I love, darkness pleases

Skull and crossbones
Poison and acid
Handle with care
I'm quite fatal
Written 1 February 2016
Jack Jenkins Sep 2017
there's a metaphor about
    finding something you weren't looking for
  an unexpected treasure,
       & you were that treasure
I wasn't looking for;
   like a pearl on the beach
or a star in the sky
       I got to graze you with my fingertips;
our lips have never met
    but you consume my every thought
unfold every layer of my heart,
        disarm me
you laid your heart on mine;
     so much love I want to give
even if there's a wait,
      it's worth the wait;
reflected in our eyes when they meet,
          burning candlelight,
    sunset through the window,
how I want you
    need you
  love you
on whatever is handy
     I will write...
:) :) :)
Jack Jenkins Dec 2016
Its the one flu that never goes away

More frequent than the common cold

More lethal than the black plague

More painful than third-degree burns

More devastating than tsunamis

More gut wrenching than death

More comfortable than sleep
Written 6 February 2016
Jack Jenkins Dec 2016
Caged as a songbird
Love hath placed me in prison
Banished from living
Written 1 March 2016... I got executed
Jack Jenkins May 2016
A moment of hope
Smothered away by love's pain
Twisted and broken
Jack Jenkins Dec 2016
This
    Desire
      Is
        Killing
          Me
         ­   But
              I'm
                Dead
                  Fulfilling
                    It.
Written 1 February 2016
Jack Jenkins Dec 2016
Cold rain falls from sky
Homicidal man below
Woman walks alone
Written 22 February 2016
Jack Jenkins Aug 2016
Your cruelty as a madman will
Not be unopposed any longer.
Sweltering swagger will be your
Undoing,
Sinking you to the bottom
Of the lake.

Ravens and rats and crows
Will feast on your heinous
Bones
Come undone and be unraveled.
Accept your punishment for crimes
Wicked and debased, born of your soul.
Jack Jenkins Apr 2017
When I see you down and blue
   all I want to do is hug you.

You feel like you're not worth it
   trust me, you're the ****!

I care about you and love you
   because you're a good person.

I've got your back, I mean it, you're fam
   I got you when people don't give a ****.
The title is an inside joke. ^^
Man
Jack Jenkins Jan 2018
Man
The desires of a man are simple:
***, greed, power,
in that order.
Jack Jenkins Jun 2016
God made a woman for me;
He slays me with her
The woes of a man's heart are immeasurable...
Jack Jenkins Oct 2016
You can put many things into mini fridges
You can put mini fridges into many things
But you can't put mini fridges into mini things
**** you can put mini things into mini fridges
A light, whimsical poem for my dark mood. :)
Jack Jenkins Apr 2016
Like an old clipper, sailing on the water
My soul searches all the seas of life
Trying to find that elusive treasure
Not made of gold or silver.

Guided by shining lights placed in towers
Guided by twinkling stars blazing in the sky
I find my wondering ways through the world
Living all the great stories yet untold.

Within the bounds of all four corners
Of this sphere we all claim as home
I search for that elusive treasure
Not made of jewels or gems.

And when I've passed on and sunk
No longer kissing the water's surface
I will be remembered always, forever
Like a ship in a bottle.
Jack Jenkins Dec 2016
Death has a thing for me
Always trying to ****** me
Giving me passionate kisses
Wearing revealing clothes

Death is quite gorgeous, actually
A charming personality unrivaled on earth
A figure that Elizabeth Banks is jealous of
And a killer instinct that's always fatal

But I resist her temptation
Because I have a thing with life
She's so much hotter anyway
Because she's my awesome wife

'Til Death do us part
Written 6 February 2016
Jack Jenkins Apr 2016
Marry me in black:

Love has become twisted and scarred in my apathetic heart
A wretched torture chamber of unfilled dreams and wasted time
Lost hearts and broken memories
Too heavy a price for nothing in the end

Contrasting

Bury me in White:

Let the sweet kiss of death reach my lips in the night
The Angel of Death will breathe into my lungs and peace shall reign
Sweet charity of being free
Hope filled of life evermore

Marry me in black; Bury me in white
Jack Jenkins Dec 2016
Do masks hide us from others?
Or ourselves?
Why do we try for perfection?
Why not honesty?

A masquerade party,
With charades all 'round,
Deception, lies, arrogance,
Bequeath underlying rot.

Born of falsehood and judgement,
Be better than the person on your left,
Whoever dies with the most toys wins,
Don't you dare take off your mask.
Written 22 March 2016
Jack Jenkins Dec 2016
Ignorance is bliss
Yet I must admit
Arrogance kisses
Much sweeter indeed

Like a sweater in snow
Your mother is cold
The pattern is checker
Move to New Mexico

The antelope of old
Yet stories seen
On a blanket bold
In yellow and red
Written 18 February 2016... another gibberish poem
Jack Jenkins Dec 2016
I never knew
Ten words were
So important
Until now
Written 24 February 2016
Jack Jenkins Dec 2016
I Wish my heart
Would figure out
What it wants
Written 15 January 2016
Jack Jenkins Oct 2017
Drab;
  Dreary;
    Bleak;
A grey mood.

why can't I remember my dream last night?

The sun shines;
  I focus on the clouds.

there was a skull involved

Laughter down the street;
  I stay straight-faced with thin lips.

why was I desperate to survive?

An aroma of coffee fills the air;
  I type at my work,
    I try to forget it;
It bothers me...

*what was my dream last night?
A strange dream I can't remember has me on edge...
Jack Jenkins Sep 2017
I think it's time for me
to stop counting the days
with notches on the wall
about something
I never really had.

It's time to stop
living in the past
& let go of mistakes
that I made in my youth
& taste the freedom of today.

Our days are a finite number
passing with each moment
every grain of sand swallowed
by the hourglass of life
until nothing remains.
Memento mori is a Latin phrase meaning ‘remember you must die’.
Jack Jenkins Apr 2017
For some reason I'm thinking
About two people I lost in the last year
My friend who killed herself because
She fell for me and I couldn't fall for her
& the woman I love who was
Torn away from me by force.

I can't help but feel regret for one
& feel devastation for the other
All I want is for them to come back
One to still be alive
The other to be in my arms
I just miss them both
I have no idea why today is so much harder then normal. I miss the love of my life so much, and I'm so sorry my friend had to die because she had nobody and the only person who ever invested anything in her couldn't reciprocate those feelings... ****
Jack Jenkins Dec 2016
Forgotten snowfall
Down the hollow crevices
Slipping below ice
Written 7 April 2016
Jack Jenkins Dec 2016
Men like me will always be alone
We're impossible to love
And what love we get
We will have to pay for
Written 19 February 2016
Jack Jenkins Apr 2016
As long as you wear glasses with mirrored lenses on the inside,
You will always be right in the eyes of the person you're talking to.
Jack Jenkins Jul 2016
Transcendent
Like a phoenix
Up from fire
Heat
Blistering skin
Of all who are
Underneath
In caves
They will hide
And scratch out
Meager living
Dripping
Forming up
Water runs
Through earth
Stalagmites
Stalactites
Pillars
Fallen down
Asleep evermore
Jack Jenkins Jun 2020
My head knows all the reasons not
But my heart is a knot
Longing for you
To hear your voice
To hear you say you're okay
I miss you, old friend
One of these days I'll be brave
But tonight is not that night
I'll slink into the shadows
Drown in the shallows
And mourn the fact
I still miss you
//On her//
Jack Jenkins Apr 2016
Soul searching on rampant seas,
Soul ravaged on tumultuous times.
Shredded remains tossed away beyond,
Stripped to the bone, stripped of all care.
//On anxiety//
Jack Jenkins Mar 2017
Yeah, we're broken,
Torn apart and led astray,
Scarred by wounds you never see,
Jaded against the world and it's beliefs.

We are the misfit *******,
That keep loving through the pain,
Because we'll take the hits for the rest,
Because we know that we are the best.

So raise your bruised arms up high,
Let the world see your black eyes,
Cuz we know we're misfit *******,
And we're proud to bleed for you.
Jack Jenkins Jun 2016
Misfit, misshapen, misplaced
Not fitting in anywhere
I'm a pariah, a loner, a coyote
Stalking the fringes of society
Never seen, never heard, never felt
Only dreamed, and imagined, and feared

If only I had a place to be
A person to see
Maybe
Maybe
I'll see brighter days ahead
And love like a dove

I am alone because I am unique
I am myself, alone, nobody else
A drop in an ocean of faces
Yet an ocean in a world of drops
Always okay, always broken
Never whole, never fractured
A contradiction of opposites
A unity of abnormality
Jack Jenkins Dec 2016
Opportunity missed,
Like a highway exit,
Went by so fast,
And my GPS is cussing me out.

It was like a blur,
I couldn't recognize,
What it really was,
Until it was far too late...

Opportunity missed,
Like the bases were loaded,
With only one out,
And I step up to the plate,
Hit into a double-play...

Opportunity missed,
Like she was giving me a,
Neon sign that said,
"I love you, I want you!"
Yet I walk right past her...

So I guess I'm trying to say,
Or, rather ask:
May I have another opportunity?
Written 23 March 2016... maybe I had no opportunity ever... ****
Jack Jenkins Apr 2016
My heart is aching
Cause
I miss you so much
Jack Jenkins Jul 2017
I can run
                from
every monster in
my nightmares
                   But
I can't run from
       Me...
Jack Jenkins Nov 2016
What monster are you?
I'm like a werewolf every full moon.
I'm the best type of person everyday.
Someone you can admire and compliment.
Polite, kind, humble...
But every now and then I transform
Into a beast I cannot control.

Howling at the moon
Yearning for blood
Seeking prey to consume.

So be aware, as well as cautious
Lest you become my next meal.
Added 15 January 2016
Jack Jenkins Dec 2019
She danced on the rooftops with the moon to her back
Proud and shining on her elegant ballet
Whisps of fog entwined her shadowed figure
As she glided backwards with her final bourree, into the night
A secluded heart now followed her everglow light
//On love//

Bourree is that very quick tiptoe ballet move.
Jack Jenkins Dec 2016
Morn's light upon me
Sun's rays glowing slowly more
A new day thus born
Written 3 March 2016
Jack Jenkins Feb 2017
I believed I was immune, invincible;
  to the scorching heat of your surface.
  That I wouldn't be burned up or
  consumed by the fires you stoke.

I was not strong enough to endure
  and turned to crystallized glass
  and fell into your atmosphere,
  shattering into sparkles of dust.

I fell apart in your atmosphere,
  shattered like a comet across
  the scorched plains of your
  heart and soul.

& in the darkness of your being
  I look up to your skies and I
  see your Aurora Borealis &
  I know everything is okay...
//On her//
To be wounded by love is the sweetest pain I have ever known...
Jack Jenkins Nov 2016
I did love you
You just
Couldn't take a
Chance
//On her//
I don't think I've ever poured such heartbreak into such few words before...
Jack Jenkins Sep 2017
I write of broken
     t e e t h &
deep wounds
nobody can see
d a r k n e s s
     shadows
agony & pain
     it is my
m u s e
that I feast
     on
but I haven't
picked up the
             p e n
in a week
  because the
m u s e
is gone right now
   I feel
strangely
    *h a p p y
Surprisingly not a dark or depressing poem about a broken heart or a lost love. :)
Jack Jenkins Apr 2018
Feel the heavy the sharp
life that twists and turns
battered and bitter loss
unholy rage unfettered
takes without a given
heralded forever alone
with walls weeping
deep wounds in my spine
how does one continue
when the final page
was three chapters ago?
Jack Jenkins Jun 2017
I have a thousand and one
                       questions
yet my words break
              before they speak
they shatter
    but I am never made whole
even when I lay these
     words on the paper canvas
drawing
  captivating with a broken
                              heart

everything feels like its
       a fractal
invisible to the naked eye
               but still existing
       like heat from the sun
wind sailing through the air
it is a broken thing inside me
         this heart
this soul has seen too much
    but the show
                       must go on
I'm not entirely sure why I am still in this life, or why I continue to believe writing everything will stop the pain. I'm uncertain of many things anymore, and people tell me everything works for a purpose. But my faith is too wounded right now.
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