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Jack Jenkins Jun 18
My head knows all the reasons not
But my heart is a knot
Longing for you
To hear your voice
To hear you say you're okay
I miss you, old friend
One of these days I'll be brave
But tonight is not that night
I'll slink into the shadows
Drown in the shallows
And mourn the fact
I still miss you
//On her//
Tizzop May 24
a golden stage of holy voices
hide us all from  the rain
a pastor, fulfilled by the holy spirit
today we are forgiven, forgiven

a young male in the audience, dancing
god is mighty, god is mighty, god is mighty
a sturdy background singer, grateful
today we are forgiven, forgiven

our god is awesome and he will be
our god is awesome and he will be
walls, decorated with kindness
today we are forgiven, forgiven

love is in the air like lights, lights
love is in the air like lights, lights
a pastor, fulfilled by the holy spirit
today we are forgiven, forgiven
Today is a holy day.

Much Love to:

YouTube: My God Is Awesome Charles Jenkins

May God bless all of you poets, poetesses and readers.
Our God is awesome.

This poem is dedicated to all of you, it's dedicated to Charles Jenkins and his amazing team of background singers, it's dedicated to my family, my wife and to my children.

Heaven yeah!
Jack Jenkins May 16
I think its time to have a talk,
A walk over the rubble of once tall walls,
That held a heart so heartless captive,
Lost in halls of raw cobbled things,
That were never really feelings, just things,

Things I need to say, to go over,
All in the name of bless-ed closure,
So sorry that I drove her so far away,
These bereft words, scribbled on a digital page,

Will never convey the dismay of this shipwrecked man,
Who crafted an island by his own hands,
Where he made himself ******,
Where he made his last stand,

But no ending ever came,
Just waves upon waves,
Of drowned dreams and half dead sorrows,
Awaiting death on every tomorrow,
Death that never came,
//self reflection//

Three years is a long time. I think I'm ready to talk to her again.
Jack Jenkins Feb 25
I spend this evening counting bumps in my popcorn ceiling

1,2,3,4,5,6,7

Heart is gnawing at my mind

8,9,10,11,12

Old washed out feelings

13,14,15,16

No words just

17,18,19

Memories

.......

when did i start crying?
//On loneliness, her, recovery//

Stifling the pain isn't a replacement for letting it go. Breathe, you're going to be okay...
Jack Jenkins Mar 3
The curtain closes after the bow
Creaking leather shoes start their step
Exit stage left
Applause
Silence

tap tap tap tap

Time stands as still as his heart
and a question ****** his mind
if his words were empty
or just the audience?

He got into this business to hurt
to feel something
It was his drug, after all
But he finally healed
Years later
A smile touches his scars

tap tap tap tap

Exit stage left
'Til death, does he art
Thank you all for reading my works, over the years. I never really planned to stop writing poetry, especially because I feel I've been writing my best work ever. this has been not only my work, but my diary. There's so much of me on this site, so much more than most people would ever know...

I'm quitting simply because I feel it is complete, at least for now. I originally started writing because I was in love with someone who is no longer in my life, every time I refer to "her" in my notes... and I've made peace with it. I'm happy.

Thank you to everyone who changed my life, from here. I wish you all the best in life. Sorry for the burnt bridges, to those I no longer speak to.
Jack Jenkins Feb 26
I sit alone this half-fogged, half-starry night on the beach
Watch the water seep over the rocks and sand and life
Your face seems to haunt the water between ripples
I draw my heart out to your ghost in the damp sand
Not in symbols or letters, but in words shaped silently
Tears salted like saltwater was my offering to God that night
And I know I chased you off for good but darling
I'll always send my love after you long after goodbye
Darling I'm used to being in love on the outside
I hope to be forgotten by you, pray to be remembered by you, and hope to see you again.
//on her and unrequited love//
Jack Jenkins Jan 21
Just a blank wall
Stare at it
Memories of her
Tell me where it hurts
The clock ticks
You can't go back in time
Memories of her
You can't make her real
So hallucinate
Drink
****
Sin
Or just stay alone
Your choice
//On addiction and her//
Jack Jenkins Feb 10
My guard dropped like an anvil from the sky
I never knew I was up so high
So alone
Freezing from the inside
Hiding lies in lust when love would've done fine
//On love and loneliness//
Jack Jenkins Jan 17
I missed the moment to kiss you
You would have tasted the pestilence on my lips

Dried lips suffocated by dust form the word "goodbye"
For love has run its due course on this coarse heart

Weariness has worn down what hope was once planted
But darling love doesn't grow in trees, does it?

so why did it have to die?
//On love//
Jack Jenkins Jan 3
2019 hit me hard like most years
but i finally started to hit back
i let myself embrace the pain
said it was okay
and started to heal
i made my peace with a lot of my past
wrongdoings i can't undo
but can forgive
both myself and others
i decided to stay in love with someone not in my life anymore
and that's okay
because she's always had my heart
most importantly i made a resolution for the first time
for 2020 i will not be suicidal
or entertain such thoughts
i will tell my demons
"how dare you think you can scare me into death"
and i will mock the voices that say there is nothing for me here
i am loved
even by myself
//on myself and life//

If you've ever struggled in life, and feel like things never will change... they may not... but you can.
Love you all, and best wishes for 2020
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