My Child
You're in a boat
And I am your oar
You'll make it farther in life
When you involve me in every aspect
If you choose not
You'll drift wherever the waters take you
Soon to be lost
Without even knowing

Let me just say two word
Many times to get it off my chest
Shut up
Shut up
SHUT UP!
You tell me I won't make it in life
You tell me I can't do this
Or I can't do that
You say I can't do it because it's difficult
Or it will take to long
You say I will give up once it gets hard
You never believed in me
Unless it was things
That were easy and in my comfort zone
So just shut up!
I don't need your negativity
Or your two cents
I don't need you to cheer me on
Because as long as I believe in me
And know that I can do it
And tell myself that I can do it
I will do it
I will prove you wrong
I will surpass all that you thought
That I couldn't do
I will go outside my comfort zone
To grow
Because I am strong
And if I want to do it
I will do it and even better
I will make it look easy
So when you attempt to do
What I am doing
You are going to struggle or fail
Unless it's something you already know
But then I'll make it look
Flawless and effortless
But don't you dare then
Act like you always believed in me
Or supported me
In any way shape or form
But you will wonder
How I did it
And I'll tell you
That you not believing in me
Started a flame
That only grew in me to want to do it
So tell me that
I can't do this
Or I can't do that
Because it will only grow that flame in me
To prove you wrong
So maybe don't Shut up
Because I want that flame
To be as big as possible
So I myself
Will Shut up
And smile
And just get to work
Proving you all wrong
Again and again
Then maybe you will support me
Because you will know
What I am capable of
Or you won't and that's okay

Feeling kind of ******
Asking for help
On things I should know
But was never taught
Feeling only like
A pretty face with a good heart

Trust me they said
In thinking that I could
Met with hurt instead
Eventually, will time heal my wounds?

Roses not always wanted
On special days
So take me away I'm
Eagerly awaiting adventure
Since memories last till end of time

I understand now

Looking at you
Only able to see you
Venturing for more
Even though I've given so much

You clearly don't want me But,
Only as a friend
Until I hope that one day you see

Make your move
Own all you do
Understanding is helpful
Never back down
Take your chances
Aim your arrow
Inhale and release
No hesitation
Seeing it through to the end

An astounding soul
So unique
Holding every precious moment close

Meeting my gaze
And staring with wonder
Details coming together
Every second
Like a puzzle forming
Every min of our future
In your stumbling of words
No on understood
Except for me

You are poison

Yet your lips on mine
That taste so sweet
Your Hands running up and down my back
Slow enough to make me draw you closer

When instead
I should be pushing you away
Because you're killing me
Slowly

As your kiss
Is paralyzing me
And your hands
So gentle
Yet fast enough
To bruise me
That I hurt

For I don't know how to decide
On who I love more
You
Or myself

To whom ever finds this bottle
My message is to you
I want to say now
I'm sorry If It sounds like I'm venting
But really I just want to tell someone
What's on my mind
And a little about me
But not know who I am telling
For some reason
That is comforting

I myself am not the brightest bulb
And I may make you want to
Hit your head against a wall
Sometimes many in a day
Because I spoke faster than my mind
Was thinking
My mind is weird
For if you ask something of me
I know I can do it
But yet my mind has a panic mode
And in a way forgets how to do it
Or the item you wanted me to grab
I question it for some reason
Even though I shouldn't have

So yea I am not all that smart
Sometimes I feel really ******
And just worse than dirt
And it's hard because I know
I am
Smarter
And better than that

I do have my moments though
Where I don't always think, rather act first
But it manages to put a smile on your
Face and make you giggle
That usually helps to make me feel better
But thinking back I feel dumb
But remember that I made you smile
And so I smile

I try my best to do better
For I love learning new things
And doing anything
That sounds different
Or fun
And an adrenaline rush
I will say yes to
Because that is such an amazing thrill

I may not always make sense
And sometimes I struggle
Putting together my thoughts into sentences
I get there eventually
But I get there

So if you're okay knowing
this little Bit about me
I hope this message
in this bottle
In your hands
Finds me
But if you do not wish
To want to know me
Then toss me back
Message in bottle
for someone new to find

What a good percent of people
see as negative
and a small percent as positive
but if I could change your mind
with one phrase
I will
Failure is the foundation to success
let me say that again
but slower
Failure
is the foundation
to success

let me explain
if you choose to try something
anything
you have never done before
you are bound to make mistakes and fail
now if you are determined
and not ready to give up
you will keep going till you succeed

so in order to succeed
you need to fail
failure is how we learn
success is not

Now don't get me wrong
I love to succeed
on my first try
but where is the fun in that
when you don't learn
unless you have failed
to where you have now somewhat perfected
what you were working so *******
then all is well

let me throw another example your way
babies learning to walk
prime example of not giving up
why?
because even though you may not have realized
you failed so many times
because you were so determined to succeed
to stay on your own two feet and walk
you realized that when you dragged your foot
and fell that, that was not going to work
so you try and move faster
even though you can't do so slowly
and you fall
again
so unconsciously put the two together
so you can then stay up and move forward

so if you are ever stuck
try combining things that worked
even though you failed
till you can come up with a way
to succeed
because eventually
you will nail it
and you will succeed
if you just push yourself
and tell yourself that
I can do this
never saying
I can't do this
because a negative mindset
will not get you anywhere
stay positive
and realize that
Falling Again Is Learning

I always mean it when I say I
Got you, Because I do
Otherwise who would I be
To lie to you. I wish not to
You make me smile without trying
Oh, doing things for you
Undoubtedly comes easy

Made my thoughts known
Out loud over text
Very nervous
Even though I knew your answer
**** as you are
Time is what you need
And I let you have it
You know where to find me

Hiding my pain behind a smile
Everyday convincing myself that
Life will get better, this is just a
Phase. Soon I can be real
Masks aside
Eventually

Help me, I'm hurting
Another day of smiles
Prepared for the best and worst
Planning an unknown future
Your happiness matters most to me

When you ask me what I am doing
If am bored
Or doing nothing
My response to you will be
Breathing

Suicide isn't the way
Talk to me, I'm here
Allow me to help
You are worth it!

I miss you always
Loving everyday
Outside alone or by my side
Very quiet to being talkative
Everyday I came home You greeted me
You loved the belly rubs
One and only, my baby
Undeniably my greatest, best friend

Friends?
I don't have any
Enemies?
Everyone
Why?
Nobody is perfect
Someone is going to hurt you
Lies
Gossip
Cheat
Or just leave you for good
Don't trust anyone
Not even yourself

The worlds mirrors

Are the lakes below

Reflecting all that is above

Did you know that everyone
Is in a time loop?
For everyday has 24hrs
Before repeating
Every week after seven days
Will repeat
After twelve months
And up to four seasons
Will eventually repeat
Back to the beginning of the loop

Each day
We wake up
And do our things for the day
And at the end of the day
We all fall asleep
To repeat the loop
The next day
But different tasks

Even the planet's
Will eventually rotate
Till they are back to where they started

The sun
Rising and setting
Each and every day

The clock
With their hands always moving
Eventually both restart at twleve

A choice i once made
Gave me this feeling
Of discomfort
A feeling that never sat right with me
For some reason this feels
Like a stay or go
Stay with me or be free from me
I hurt
But i know you ache with pain
That should not be there in the first place
Im sorry
And if forgiveness is not an option
Then to be free it must be
For to move forward
We need forgiveness and to move on
To leave it in the past
I promise to you
That I want only you till I die
My mistakes
Are stupid
And i know who i have and how much
You mean to me
So to lose you
Would be too much
That my mistake
Would be the breaking of your heart
And mine

Relax, my child
Everything is going to be okay
For I have everything under control