I'm tired of telling the millionth person
the same story of how love died
& they pull out a pad and pen
trying to fill in the blank,
cracking the secret formula,
of why it happened:
"You two weren't compatible"
"You need to love yourself more"
"She wasn't the right one for you"
"You weren't the right one for her"
"It was just young love"
"These things just happen"
Everyone has their own perspective on it
& nobody really
Because I don't need to know why;
if I did I would be stuck in the past,
and trying to fix it.
I just need to know how to keep living
when every time my heart beats
it hurts because the one who I gave it to
is missing from my life
How do I not lose my breath when I think of her?
How do I quit having dreams about her?
How can I move on from losing my best friend because I lost control of my mental health and shut her out?
How does neglect become undone when you are removed from their life?
She was 7 years of happiness in my life; not a long time to many, but remember I am only 23 years old.
I grew into a man with her stitched to my heart.
So please don't try and tell me why it fell apart.
Please just tell her I love her if you see her.
I know people want to help, and I'm very grateful for the care so many have for me. It's just insensitive to try and fix someone who is just trying to learn how to move on.
If you really want to know the "why" you'd have to live through it because it is far more complex and nuanced than just filling in a blank like a crossword puzzle.