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Hello Daisies Mar 2019
Marry me
Marry me
My shining beauty

Dance with me
Dance with me
On this spinning merry go round

I am a fairie
And you are a wizard
Together we make magic
In a world thats a blizzard


Shine with me
Shine with me
On top the moonlit sea

Run away
Run away
Together into the forest

I'll twinkle my wings
As you wave your wand
I'll never lose your reflection
In this glistening pond
Hello Daisies Apr 2023
Breathe breathe
Let the calming music
Take you in
Let yourself grin

Feel the light
The nostalgia
The childhood innocence
The laughter
For here after

Remember the past
remember the good times
Not just that darkness
Remember
The happy
Times
They are there
They are everywhere

Maybe some memories
Once happy
Still hurt too much
Move on
To happier ones
A time before
Your heart tore

Smile today
Smile and play
Life has a way
Of making us sway
Into complete
Chaos
So take time
To release
Take time to
Feel at ease

Some memories
Have a hold on me
They make me feel
A way I can't explain
I can touch them still
Feel then on my back
Feel the air, the walls,
Every crack
It was such a special time
The perfect crime
It's over now
It hurts
But remember
It was once happy
The best days of my life
So make more
Of those
Days
Make more times  
To play
A special place to
Stay
For later
When I feel alone
I can look inside
And find a home
Make those memories
Make that magic
Breathe the air
That gives you life
Feel it in every bone
Make it special
Make it known
Love loud
Love proud
Don't ever
Ever
Let this life
Keep you down
❤️
Hello Daisies Jan 2019
Pacing pacing
Pacing racing
Falling screaming

Staying going
Writing cryiNG
RACING RACING
WORDS WORDS WORDS

S T O P
NO NO

Soemone talk to me
I'm feeling needy
No wait

I feel great
It's 3am
I don't even need sleep

I've slept all day
So tired
I feel uninspired

Wow it's so pretty
I am too
Everyrhing is okay

Listen to me
LISTEN TO ME
STOP STOP

IGNORING ME

Trauma trauma
Get over it
Stop throwing a fit

Are you okay
You need help
I'll do anything

Dear god
Am i crazy
Everyone says i am

Look at them
Disturbing
I can't be like that

No wait
I like this
It makes me different

Dear god **** me
It's not unique
I'm a freak

Tears of joy yesterday
Now drops of sorrow
Ahaha love is borrowed

Whisper whipser
calming calming
The storm is coming

I sent you a novel
YOU DIDN'T REPLY
Dear god my minds dry

Stop talking
Speak to me
So restless endlessly

Daydreaming
Oh the day is gone
Where'd you all go

Time is slow
No it's F A S T
Nothing is meant to last

I'm tired now
I can't sleep
Maybe I'll research

Something neat

Goodnight
Goodnight
LEAVE ME ALONE

Okay im sorry
For the harsh tone

Why are you leaving

                        This is normal
I think i need to accept I'm like my father
With a bipolar disorder
My minds gone crazy
Not sure who i was today
People said wow yoyre so funny and happy today
But yesterday i wanted to end myself

I can't sleep again

I wish i was normal lol
Hello Daisies Dec 2018
I'll never get married
Love is a lie
Be single til i die

Cinderella was beautiful
Prince came to her
And sparkles were everywhere

They rode into
Happily ever after
With joyous laughter

Love like that exists
Until you open your eyes
And you start to cry

love left you traumatized
After so long they changed
Became so deranged

I'll never get married
Anyone i ever love
Turns into a black dove
Me
Hello Daisies Jan 2019
Me
the more i grow
The more i see
Myself i know

Is disgusting

Never did i realize
Just how dark
The pain is in these eyes

It's disturbing

Finding myself
I want to stop
Can i be someone else

I'm a freak

Everything i hated
Never would i dare
Now it makes me elated

Soon I'll burn

I never was pure
Everyone insisted
I wanted to be sincere

Maybe i don't care

I'm selfish
I want to do this
It gives me small bliss

How sick

It's wrong
Others are hurt
Make the voices be gone

The sun never shines for me
:/ even when im happy its wrong
Hello Daisies Jul 29
Have you ever heard
A melody
A toon
A song
So sad
You had to scream
Turn that off

That's me
That's where I belong
But,
You would only be mad
If I said no,

Keep it on.
Hello Daisies May 2020
I can't find the words to write
To make this pain sound beautiful
It just ******* *****
I haven't moved from my bed
I'm already half dead
Crying until I'm shaking
I'm sweating and sick
And I just want to touch you
But then I'll puke
From my hurting heart

You ******* ****
How could you hurt
Such a sweet little heart
I just wanted to give you my all
And you broke me to the ground
But you're sorry
You're my friend right
Why does my chest feel so tight
I can't make any sense right

Lost all my friends
*** you're all I can say
You're my whole day
Burning inside my brain
Tearing open every wound
I've stopped crying today
Not because it doesn't hurt
But because I needed a break

I told you we were okay
We would go back to normal
What else could I ******* say
Being without you was unbearable
Being with you is just as terrible
Your words circle through me
Constantly they jab me
Every spasm I endure
Is just another reason
To beg for more

I lay here awake
Not much more to say
I'm gonna brake
And accept you're not for me
I can't escape this
The loneliness
It's with me
It never leaves
You on the other hand
Surely will always leave
It's what's meant to be

I think
Oh I know
I'm going to cry again
  I wish you could feel my pain
And melt the **** away
Sigh
Hello Daisies Apr 2023
Memories
Memories
The key
Memories
Memories
I flee

Meditation
They say
Meditation
Will play
Meditation
Is the way

Yet my memories
Of you
Were my happiest
My memories
Of you
Were the sappiest

Now I die
I die a little
I die a lot
I die from the thought
Of my happiest memory

From start
To finish
the very beginning
Of adolescence
You were there
We were never scared
Together
We shared
Memories
Moments
Golden pictures
Golden snaps
Forever burned
Forever there
Now I'm scared

My memories
Memories
Of you
They have ahold
On me
My memories
Memories of you
Leave me in absolute
Agony

I miss you
I miss them
I miss the feeling
Of adolescence
Of fun
Of freedom
Of hope
Of every single blissful
Moment
In the sky
With you
In the sky
Who knew
We'd fall
Fall so hard
And break
Never to mistake
Healing us together
Again

Memories
Memories of you
I can't meditate
I can't think
Of the past
Unless I go
Too far back
My childhood
My childhood
I stood
Low
I cried
Every night
My childhood
Mostly
A fright

My memories
Memories of you
what I held onto
Now I bleed
I bleed
Without any seed
Of hope
I bleed
I bleed
With a need
I bleed
Onto my knees
On the ground
Without a sound

No one wants to hear it
I don't want to bear it
But my memories
Memories
Of you
We're all I knew
It's how I grew
It's how we flew
Now
On the ground
With no sound
haunting
Flashes of shadows
Creeping into me
What was once bright
Now a scary sight
Now a sad plight
For help

My memories
Memories of you
Haunt me
In my dreams
In my car
From a far
In my house
In my bed
In every tear
I shed
Please please
I pled

I let it be now
I let it hurt
Let it sting
It isn't leaving
You were more then everything
Now it's mud on the ground
Now it's death with no sound
It's broken bones
And ripped veins
Its falling and reaching up
But no one's there
Falling into
Throw up

Those are my memories
Memories now
My memories
Memories
Of you

My memories
Hurt
Me
Now
And forever

Memories
...
Now and forever
Hello Daisies May 2019
Bitter bitter
Blues and hues
Too bright for me

Crisp crisp black
Truly shows my lack
Of life I live

I wish I was strong enough
To let the red flow
Down my skull

Restless restless
Endless drought
Orange sand burns

Grays all ive known
Sure I've grown
Into a darker shade

I'm done trying to play
If God exists he's been telling
I just never wanted to listen

This is my existence
No pinks or purples
Just melancholy gray

But hey it's okay
I'll keep sinking life away
It's just another useless day

None of this is real
I can't really deal
Maybe if I bleed I'll feel

I cry inside
I bleed inside
But I'm dead outside

If God exists
Please tell me why
You never let me die

I've prayed for it
Almost nightly
It's too unsightly

I miss my mom
as she gets older
I grow even colder

When will this all end
I can't ******* pretend
I have a shred of yellow

Let me Bellow
To the skies
All my cries

Nothings there
Everyones abandoned me
Maybe this is hell

I only know misery
Hi
Hello Daisies May 2019
I looked upon her
The glow on the lake
Long and vast

I looked to her left
The deep blue
Makes me feel small

All I saw
Was beauty and despair
Whispering in her air

I cried to her
I talked and pleaded
Her glow did not answer

Oh sweet beauty
She's but a msytery
And I fear my life

Even while staring upon her
Is but misery
Hello Daisies Dec 2018
Close my eyes
See my dreams
Made of my bliss

Nothing is my happiness
From striving
To a n g e r

Sadness was my major
Always so                    Lonely
My eyes don't want to open

Sleep my only token
Pretending I'm as before
But laying here i know

Being alive is a show
I died inside
Yet they want me to believe

I keep going with no relief
I've given up on me long ago
Yet when music plays

Tears d
             rop where i lay
Small glimmer of emotion
Just may still remain after all
Hello Daisies Aug 2019
Caught in the midnight dew
The sense of autumn is in you
I get lost in the silk of your hair
For your eyes are too much to bare

My tummy twist and turns
Butterflies every single turn
As the leaves fall And the cold follows
A glimpse of you scares away all my sorrows

You're like every Taylor swift song
I know you by heart, as I sing along
You remind me of every happy moment
Your smile makes sure I won't forget

You're calm, fun, and charming
Never too alarming
You're a breeze into many souls
You're my autumn
Let me be your ghoul
Hello Daisies Dec 2022
When I was younger
I would lie awake
Crying
Praying
The other side of the bed wouldn't be empty
One day
Maybe someday

I never imagined
I had no clue
I only dreamt
Of someone like you

I don't think you know
Despite your joking ego
That you're beautiful
Inside and out
Not a single doubt

You're welcoming and true
You're hardworking and unapologetically you
You're the sweet warm brew
That brightens up my blue

I love the kindness you have
I love the way you laugh
I love being with you in a bath
And the way you make me laugh

I never for a second thought
That such a gift would be brought
Into this sad cold world
But here you our
With every single flaw
You own it
You flaunt it
I love you to pieces and bits!

You're like the snow
I waited so long for you to show
you came along
My heart started to grow
The crystals and cold
The icy white snow
You are a breath of cold wind
Blowing on my face
Making me feel this is my place
My home
My joy
My happiness
Maybe others don't understand
But I know you are one hell of a man!

I love you

Duh!
Hello Daisies Jun 2020
The brisk breeze through your hair
The clouds barely covering the moon
The colors that warm your soul
Autumn has always made me feel whole

I always say the best things happen
When the leaves fall down
I'm at my happiest
When the ghost run around

Just so happens that I found a connection
In my costume gown
You gave me a coat
I slept in it all night
It took away my fright

From that moment on
I felt something special
I enjoyed talking with you
Kinda scared to let it go through

As October passed and winter came
The snow fell down another day
Another true bliss of mine
To be covered in snow that shines

As I played as I smiled
I looked upon the stars
I felt warm inside yet Cold outside
There was your home to keep me alright

I thought maybe it's silly
Silly to believe in  the seasons
Crazy to think the stars have reasons
But I truly did believe in

The hope that they bring me
The warmth of their brisk mornings
And their crisp nights
I knew I'd find something just right

I can't speak the words
But I can write them
And what my pen is trying to say is
I love you, and the warmth you bring me
Is even greater then
The lovely bliss of autumn
Or even the soft hope of winter

Thank you for being
Just like the autumn leaves
And falling for me
❤️
Hello Daisies Sep 2019
I'm getting tired
Tired of writing about the small things
That fade away before the end of the day
Every touch
Every smell
Every blush

Gone before I get to grasp

When will it ever be my turn
To fall in love
When will you ever
Look at me and see someone
Who's enough
Hello Daisies Aug 2019
***** my body
The needles thread through me
Pierce me Pierce me
I'm crying in thread
Inside I'm mostly dead

I knot inside
Shooting the needle down me
Slicing softly my skin bleeds
I'm aching on my knees

Help me help me
No one hears me
All I ever cry
Help me help me
The thread is twisting

No one's to blame
It's such a shame
After all the twisting
My thread is slowly ripping

Center in my arms
Give me more scars
Stabbing stabbing
Where's my mommy and daddy

They left me to bleed
They broke their seed
needles run inside
Laughing and breaking my sanity

I'm dying I'm dying
God help me I'm crying
The needles are physical
Not metaphorical

Bruise my skin
I let the craft win
What is it creating
I'm still awaiting

I think it's trash
My colors all clash
If you throw me away
Will it stop the gruelling pain

Please I beg
God please lay me to bed
I've had far too much thread
My blood is turning to lead

The needles crept in long ago
They put on a menacing show
I want to go home
But there's...no where to go

My needle can't be tied off
The thread only falls
Blood platters
My heart clatters
I'm left untied
God please you know how hard I've tried

Tie my thread off for good
Please, if you would
Stop the sew
End me and all that I know
I'm in a lot of pain I think it's anxiety but my God it hurts like needles in my arms and tben they feel like a heart attack
New
Hello Daisies Nov 2019
New
Lately my face has been blush red
Like a rose

My heart has been calm yet excited
Like a river flowing

I start to cry
I can't decide
If what im feeling is good
Ive never felt like this before

Is it happiness?
It is joy?
I'm so scared
Maybe it's just a another ploy
To hurt me again

I can't describe how I feel
Not truly
Because it's so new
I know it's warm

Just please don't hurt me
Like everyone else has before
Hello Daisies Jun 2019
Here here little bird
Come quietly without a word
Come see the shimmering beauty

It bounces off the moon
Into the lake
Red blue and green
Dancing like a ballerina

Chirp to me little bird
Sing your song with all your words
This night has a touch of magic

Why are you awake so late?
I'm glad you're here
But fear you may be misplaced
Entranced and misguided by her
Glowing touch

Use her warmth as a clutch
She holds the last hope
Only gliding softly through
Our dreams
Idk I'm tired
Hello Daisies Mar 2019
I was raised
To be broken
I feel faint
Every day

I never before could explain
Why I loved you
And wanted to be with you
In the pouring rain

I love you because
You were normal
Being around you i almost felt
Just like everyone else

I could watch you
With all others
Showing affection
You had no clue

The pain of malnutrion
Hiding any emotion
Being alarmed of human touch
No one could listen

Its blinding
How sick i truly am
My body craves health
It all seemed so winding

Yet i see it was simple
I needed nutrition
The ones everyone else has
That they find so little

I'm too afraid to grow
I let my body rot
For love and affection
I never did know

Starved for life
I crave such simplicity
I want to Hug you
And let go of this knife

I hold onto it bleeding
I only know how to open
With pain and suffering
How can i show happy feelings

I'd say I'm lost
But that implies i once
Knew where i was going
I was born with no cross

I hold no meaning
Or hope for anyone
I suffer for nothing
I want to stop screaming

What's it like to be alive
In your eyes I almost saw
Peace of mind and a desire
To be normal and let my emotions
Finally arrive
Hello Daisies Sep 2018
Well maybe I'm starting to know
Deep down in my being
That to try in this world has no meaning

Maybe I've always knew
But it's overflowing
My entire life the strife has been growing

The harder you try
The harder you fall
But try they say or it'll mean nothing at all

I feel as a fool
Breaking my back
For a life that doesn't love me back

I blame myself
And i blame others
Really i just need to close the shudders

Why unravel thyself to the world
Trying, bending, and overflowing everyway
When we'll just end up closed off and buried six feet under anyway

Theres no point,  
no point at all
We'll all rise and eventually fall

So lets all take a deep breath
Breathe in the truth
That life, love, trying it's all useless there is  no use.
I wrote this a bit ago while going through a hard time and losing a lot in life
Hello Daisies Mar 2023
You tore out my heart
laying on the ground
Finally I hear it's sound
Pa dum pa dum
I'm obsessed with this sound
Pa dum pa dum
Pa dum
Pa dum

You tore me apart
I'm listing to my heart
All I hear is this sound
Sounds of broken magic
Sounds of something tragic
Pa dum pa dum ssss

Obsessed with such beauty
Obsessed with the sweet romance
Obsessed with the brisk October
With the warm summer nights
Waiting in lines
Reaching the destination
Seeing the stars
Falling apart
Falling
Onto my own heart
Pa dum pa dum

You tore my heart out
Laying on the ground
I'm obsessed with it's sound
Pa dum pa dum

All I hear
All I swear
It's all I hear
It's all I care
About
Your sound
Mini m&Ms
Laying on the playground
Mini M&Ms
Don't usually have a sound
When you see them
I can hear them
Pa dum pa dum
We always shared them
Pa dum pa dum


We shared many things
Secrets, truths, heartbreak
Laughter love
Adventure
We shared many
Many of these
Can you believe
I could ever let it go
Let this sound go
Pa dum pa dum

I can finally hear it again
Thank you my beloved friend
You tore my heart out
The one I thought I lost
With you in the war
Or maybe from before
Now I feel the magic
Of every moment of course
I cherish how it hurts
...hurts
It hurts ....it hurts so
Pa dum pa dum pa DUMPADUMPADUMDDUMDUMDOOOMDOOMDOOM

I cherish it so
Thank you for this pain
I dance in the blood
Of the bleeding of vein
On the ground
I dance
On the ground
To the sound
Of my torn out heart
I relish every part
From finish to start
Repeating
Cycling
    through me
  Constantly
I dance
I...
Dance
As I paint my face red
With every shade
Every piece of led
You ever fed
Me
I can taste it
I can hear it
The sound
Of the trains
Pa dum pa dum

You tore my heart out
On the ground
I am obsessed with the sound
Pa dum pa dum
The sound of trains at night
The sound of laughing and feeling alright
The sound...of inner bliss
And naivety over this
I can hear the sound
Of my heart again
Having it ripped open
I am obsessed with the ****** romance
Of feeling pain
It's better then nothing
So they say
I wish there was another way
To hear
The sound of my heart
Then having it torn apart
Laying on the ground
Pa dum pa dum
Watching it bleed out
With every
Time
I
See
Your face
Every
Time
I
See
That place
Every
Pa dum
Pa dum
Time I see the stars
Pa dum pa dum
Every
Time
I
Remember
Your
Heart
Pa dum pa dum
Every
Time ...
Every
Time
I
...pa dum pa dum
Every
Time
I
Wish
We weren't apart
Pa dum pa dum
It loses more
Blood
The sound is slowly
Mud
Until I learn to erase
Your disgrace
Until I learn
To face
My obsession
With my lost
Possession
It'll die
And the sound will go

Until then
This is all I know
To hold onto
To feel

You tore out my heart
On the ground
I'm obsessed with the sound
...pa dum pa dum
Pa...ssssss


You've won again
My once beloved friend
Hello Daisies Jun 2021
It feels like forever
Since I heard this call
Forever
Since I wanted to fall
It's been so long
I almost forgot it all

Months went by
Not a tear went down
Days and days
And I forgot the sound
Where was I

Bottled up it seems
I forgot all my dreams
I thought it was better
To forget the weather
The storms I know so well

I wasn't myself
I couldn't even tell
I forgot how to scream
I forgot my breaking seems

Now it's called back
The oceans wave
Don't fall into the grave
Over flooding tidal waves
Hit me suddenly but slowly

I remember who I am
The voices called me again
I'm a ship at wreck
A pirate drowing
A voyager lost at sea
This is me

I'm a emotional wreck
I was *******
Lost my name
But the ocean called me
And surely I came
Just writing my emotions lol
Hello Daisies Dec 2018
Sitting here i ponder
A poem to write with wonder
But the open wounds call my name
I pick them open and let the blood drain

Once i pick there's no going back
I'll keep going until i have an anxiety attack
It gives me sick pleasure to feel the pain
open wounds are  everywhere
i cannot restrain

I want to heal to grow past this
my flesh it calls for the sadistic bliss
scars they harden into my skin
I know I'm no good I let them win

Nothing can stop this eternal hell
like a red ocean into which
i fell
This one was about my anxiety and my issie with picking at my skin
Hello Daisies Oct 2018
Driving in the rain
My brain starts to yell
Obscenities i cannot tell
To anyone for they are but shame

I want to **** me
But i dont i feel bad
I can't understand why my mind is mad
At myself what did i do I'm trying hopelessly

My heart pounds
I nearly crash
I move my car in a swerved dash
My body is shaking through the ground

I can't breathe
Im crying and shaking
What is my mind making
I just want to leave
Having a panic attack
Hello Daisies Apr 2019
I'm clenching
Aching
Stabbing
BEAT
BEATING

I've beem in a daze
Like a sumemr haze
Without
The
Sun

It's all so fast
My heart won't last
It's gonna explode
I must write one last
Note

I thought i was getting better
It was lifting with changing weather
Then they left
They kept leaving
Now I'm
Weeping

It's an emergency
No no I'm fine
My heart is just racing
Like it's
Dying

God is stabbing me
I forget how to breathe
I say I'm ok
My mind won't open

Where am i
Who am i
What day is it
Help me
Help me
HELP ME

IT'S RACING
IT'S HURTING
I'M HAVING A HEART ATTACK
IT KEEPS COMING BACK
CRYING
CRYING
SOMEONE HELP
IT'S BLURRY
I WANT TO YELL

STOP
STOP
I CANNOT BREATHE
WITH THIS CONSTANT
POUNDING
ALL OVER ME

FROM MY HEAD
THROUGH MY TEETH
MY HEART STRINGS
A SONG
OF PAIN
SO BLEAK

it's fine
I'm okay
I'm only in
Constant pain
Wishing my life
Away
Yes hi im having a panic attaxk since yesterday i even went to the emergency room thinking i had pneumonia or some linda heart issue

Im used to anxiety ams those attacks
Thsi is a whole new level of panic pain
And fear
My heart hasnt stopped racing in two days and i cannit sleep or stop crying
Hello Daisies Apr 2019
We write poems and songs
Of romance when our hearts beat
Faster and f a s t e r

It's beautiful
It's romantic
It's poetic

Unless the fast pace
Doesn't stop
Hours and hours
Pass me by
It gets faster

There's no calm in sight
My chest is clenching
Not for love
Not for beauty
Only cruelty

Days and days pass
It still last
Fasterfaster
Beatbeatbeatbeat

I can't win in this life
No matter the precaution
I keep falling
Into new depths
And deeper crypts

Of terror
Are these supposed to last for days it hurts
Hello Daisies May 2019
I'm not fighting for happiness
For that I know I'll never obtain

I'm just fighting
For some type of peace
In this ****** up brain
Hello Daisies Nov 2018
Free and flowing
Vivid dreaming
Never knowing
Where I'll be next

Pink and full of fluff
Dancing carelessly
Nothings too rough
With peace and love

Sunshine and smiles
Confidently living
Openly being wild
With my emotions

Beauty and stars
Flowing clothing
Driving fast in cars
With new faces along the way

What am i talking about, you ask?
A life full of peace
A life i feel within my hidden mask
that i want to let shine through brighter then the sun
Im always trying to find myself not knowing who i am but i always come back to these kinds of emotions, soft and at peace. I love colors and i love freedom. I only wish inwas confident in myself the way i imagine to be. Flowing in the wind.
Hello Daisies Aug 2022
The moon shines down
Bigger then ever
Better then wherever
I left my heart last

a sign of beauty
Of romance
Wanting to dance
Or even prance!

I've been feeling loss
All kinds of grief
It's still within me
It'll never leave

sights like this
Chills in the air
Blow upon my skin
Problems seem so thin

My heart hurts
It follows me everywhere
Sometimes I forget why
the pain stays the same

In the name of this pain
I try to find my peace
Sometimes the moon shines
I feel a great release

Thank you for the beauty
Thank you for the calm
I want to rest my head
On the shimmering palm
Of the moons light

Ever so bright
Take my grief
My ball of hate
Take the weight
throw it away

In the seasons
It'll return
Through the wind
Crashing until burn
Into my skin
I'll feel the fire
But I'll never tire
Of what is higher

Shine down upon me
Let me glow
I will grow
Ever stronger
As I hope longer
For the pain to settle

The fires will calm
Every autumn
Perhaps sleep
Every winter
I know it'll attack
Ever harder
In the summer

As I await the return of your peace
I'll never forget
The promise
Of your sweet relief

Life is bittersweet
At it's very best
It's all a mess
I fight the screeching
With the hope of whispers
Quietly speaking
your delicate breeze

Thank you moon for shining tonight
For glowing ever so bright
The biggest I've seen you in many nights
My grief has calmed
The storm is not gone
But settled
For a night of love
For a moment of peace
Just a dash of hope
a night to hold
Hello Daisies May 2020
If you've never been molested
If you think it's no big deal
If you think it's the victims fault
If you think we're just attention seekers

Just know this
I've been dead since I was a child
I can't recall who I was
Or who I ever will be
I can't feel anything
I'm completely empty

I see shadows
Of monsters and demons
I pray to a god I may not believe in
I can't trust anyone
Not even my own family

I block out my memories
Only to bleed through my dreams
I can't breathe if someone touches me
I'm shaking endlessly
I'm unable to love

I can't be loved
It was taken from me
When their hand went into me
I was broken
By a man who got sympathy

Where's my sympathy?
Where's my healing
Where's my it's not your fault
They gave it to him
Let him sin
With a grin
While I'm here
Sinking
Into darkness

I only let monsters hold me
I'm afraid of the light
I'm disgusting and it's always my fault
How everything went wrong

I'm so sorry
That you're disgusting disgrace
Touched my innocent face
Forced me into a shadow
Peeled my skin from me
Shed me into insanity
I looked so cute in my bathing suit huh

And noone ever came
They never stopped it
Always ignored
Always devoured
So please understand
I will never heal
I will never deal
And I will continue to peal
Until my body dies
Along with my soul
Quarentine has my trauma raised up and I have been denying it this entire time but I guess it's really hitting me tonight
Hello Daisies Jan 2019
Nobodys perfect
But how i would try
To never fail anyone

always be a clean one
Never make a mistake
Don't sin just hide

It ate me up inside
I became brittle
I judged harshly

Lately I'm growing rapidly
Understanding life
Everyone is human

To be human
Is to make mistakes
And learn as you go

Yet as i finally show
All my human flaws
Everyone is in disgust

Perfect for me is a must
I catch myself saying
How can i let this go

So i can grow
Pit
Hello Daisies Jul 2019
Pit
This pit in my stomach is tasty
It inflates me
Leaves me gasping
In tragedy

I'll sing a peaceful Melody
It won't calm me
I'll just pretend willfully

The voices ring to me
Screaming screaming
They never seem to stop you see
This pit grows steadily

Twisting and burning
All throughout me
I pretend optimistically
Until I bend

Lay me down
Let me sleep
You hear me weep
As each voices whispers
I quiver
Quiver
Quiver

I must adore this seed
That lets me bleed
For it's all I know
So I'll reap it and sow
:(
Hello Daisies Aug 2019
AAHHHHHHH
ahhhH
AHH
AH
A
PIECE OF ME IS BITING
AND ITS CRYING INTO MY FLESH
I CANT STOP BEATING MYSELF INTO DEATH

MAKE IT STOP YOU ******* ****
I WANT THE NEEDLES TO STOP PIERCING
I WANT MY GUMS TO STOP BLEEDING
BREATHE DEEPER AND DEEPER
I WANT SOMEONE INSIDE ME
FEEL MY PAIN FOR A CHANGE
WHILE I TAKE YOUR WHORISH PLEASURE

IM SEARCHING FOR TREASURE
ITS BLOOD AND GUTS ANS MEN
TALL DARK DRUGGED UP
GIVE ME A HIGH
I'VE BEEN TOO LOW IN LIFE

IM DISGUSTING
IM MUTANT
IM GRUESOME
TAKE MY ARMS AND BREAK THEM
TAKE MY NECK AND CRACK ME OPEN

**** MY INSIDES
IM ****** UP
MY HOLES ARE BURNT
MY HEART IS GONE
SPIDERS CRAWL UPON ME
I SCREAM AND SEEK SANITY

H E L P
H E L P
H E L
H E
H E HURT ME UNTIL I DIED
I DON'T REMEMEBR BEING BORN
I ONLY KNOW DEATH
AND THE TASTE OF YOUR BREATH

ASHXHXJ[DJDNKDJDM_FN!DN]
Djsksnsn
DksoJSJSNSNS
SKSKSKS
SJ­SISOI
AISSK
Aisji
Fhi
Di
I break down and break down
Into meaningless nonsene.
I pray that one day it'll calm down
And form meaning behind the scrambled
Maybe even the smallest amount of peace
All I can say is please
Oh God please
Not doing well
Hello Daisies Oct 2018
There once was a girl named Mary Louis
She was from another planet far away
She was so excited to learn all the things she just had to stay!
Everyone enjoyed her silly self, always chasing bees

They called the alien little miss positivity!
She was always happy and eager to learn
Until she tried to do things with no money and got burned
The humans looked at her and said what are you thinking get in  reality!

She took this as a stepping  stone still excited for life
She'd dance wherever shed go never staying still
Everyone got annoyed with her and told her to jump off a hill
They told her you're too old for fun come get with strife!


No matter what happens, she said she wouldn't lose her self
She'll see the good in everyone always there for those in need
They told her she was naive everyone will make you bleed
They didn't like who she was she was too different from everyone else on the shelf

Now surely she cries every night wishing for her death
She doesnt smile to humans anymore she lets them know of her sad soul
They look at her and say be positive,  you could be so phenomenal!
Mary cries into her hands, but this is what i was taught, to be sad until my last breath!
I dont think this is actually good but i had a story in my mind i wanted to write and thought maybe i would try it as a poem
Hello Daisies Jan 2019
Pounding
  Pounding
           Pounding
                            POUNding
                                         POUNDING
                      poUNDING
               POUND
ING
       ING
POUND

Everyday
It pounds
Each side
I'm on the
     ground
Crying
Cry

   Ing
How many times
Can i wish
     For
        Eternal
Dark

            Ness
My head hasnt stopped throbbing in pain for over a month now
Hello Daisies Sep 2019
I could feel you
In my heart
For tbe first time in years
You came to me
Awoken my eyes

Broke all the lies
Running in my mind
I felt your wind
Blow through me
You calmed me

My heart sped up
But my tears began to stop
I felt you there
You answered my prayer
Maybe not
But
I'll beleive it

For one night I wasn't alone
As I've been shown
Maybe there's always someone
Watching over me
Keeping me safe
So I'll fight
Fight til I die

I pray you're always by my side
Hello Daisies Mar 2022
I took the memories
Poured them down the drain
I do not retain
A single stain

My passed is gone forever
Its a little too clever
Or so I thought

If I erased my past
It would always last
She comes to me whispering

My dreams of her haunt
In a dungeon of taunts
The pain flaunts

The doctor asks what's wrong
I can't sing the song
I've forgotten from so long

It plagues my being
I'm still sitting there weeping
Blocked away from my frontal lobe

I am like a globe
I begin to mope
If shook around

If left alone I'll be bland
No harm or evil plans
My brain is at ease

I shake at night in my dreams
I'm left with awful feelings
Uncertainty what it means

I shiver and hurt
Pain hidden under my shirt
The scars are there

My heart is bare
I swear it so
I am not broke

Not anymore
For this I must be sure
I am a new girl

I do not know the other
Must not speak of her ever
If you are clever

Leave it behind
Pay it no mind
Or else I'll lose mine

Living like this is fine
The nightmares are for sleep
The new me isnt for the weak
What you can see is free
I can pretend
That is me
I'm free
Or so it seems
Hello Daisies Aug 2019
I like
Pretty things
I like
Sparkles
I like
Makeup
I like
To have fun

Stop ******* telling me it's wrong

I like
braids in my hair
I like
Men with long hair
I like
To have ***
I like
To dance with others

Stop blaming me for your troubles

I like
To be free
I like
To laugh
I like
Partying
I like
Being away from you

You can't hurt me the way you used to

I like
To live
I like
To be normal
I like
Being loved

And yet I still beleive in a god above

And you can never take that away from me
I'm doing alright, had a good day yesterday finally had some fun! But I still got my issues every night as usual lol
Hello Daisies Jul 2019
*** I need my vacation
It's been forever
Since I've had my pleasure time

Have you ever lived without a dime
Lived without eating
Lived while barely breathing?

It's not fair I need my weekend off
I haven't seen my boyfriend today
I'm too young for this

Did you have a home growing up
A loving mother and father
Comfort and clean water ?

Please look around you
Realize what you have
Stop acting so entitled
Most people haven't eaten in awhile

You have love
You still have hope
You have money
And friends

What would you do if that all ends

Im sorry about this
But it simply amazes me
How people don't appreciate
Every little thing

Because life is so difficult
I can't even believe
The things you have
If I may speak honestly

I'm happy for people
Who have good health and love
But for goodness sake
Appreciate it and stop
Complaining so much

It's hard to watch
When I can't even find lunch
That  you're ******* because
It's been a year since you've visited
Florida
I'm sorry I just I grew up very poor and alone and homeless so I try to appreciate so many things I didn't really have a childhood and to hear these people speak just upsets me.
*But my VACATION* LIKE most people don't get vacations?
I'm only 20 I shouldn't have to work full time...
I'm only 22 my life shouldn't be pain suffering and near homelessnes
You're going to college you have friends money a future and a family

Please appreciate that.
Hello Daisies Jun 2019
Sweet little child
Your laying on a cloud
It rains endlessly

You can't come off it
Sinking through it
You pray

Their darkness thunders
Turns your heart to blunders
Am I the bad one?

You fall asleep
Falling as you weep
You're in a puddle

Cold and broken
Always misspoken
Is this better ?

Never been perfect
But you always work it
Until they throw dirt

And you lie in your puddle
Seeing your struggle
You feel disgraceful

Always so sorry
Wishing my puddle
To be an endless ocean
Hello Daisies Apr 2019
Blood rush
From my heart
To my face
Like running a race

People i pass
Fast like a blur
Some faces i notice longer
Some make me somber

I try to hold it all in
Running down this track
I went a different way
At times i start to sway

I want to fall over
This race is nonsense
My face is dripping sweat
I'm beginning to fret

People boo me from afar
It makes me go slower
Some cheer me on
Helps me struggle along

Is this race worth winning
Or do i simply want reach the end
It's going by so fast
I'm afraid I'll come in last
Hello Daisies Mar 2019
Empty
           Void

I was nothing
But silence
Silence screamed
Pouring death into me

Daggers on my tongue
From my mouth they sprung
I couldn't stop

No one listened
Shadows consumed
Then left me for the moon

i cried everynight
Begging for god
To listen
Anyone to please listen

My cries bellowed
I saw demons
They laughed at me
Leaving me in agony

I lost my music
I had it long ago
I must have left it
Buried in snow

Snowflakes fell
The beauty lost in the dirt
I had once heard magic
Until all i saw was tragic

Piercing pistols of silence
Gripped into my body
Leaving only blood wounds
Open for monsters to consume

I'm so afraid everyday
I'm starting to awake
Climbing the mountain
To hear the musical fountain

Splashing and consuming
The water up there is clear
Rushing and cleansing
My body is trembling

I am seeing musical notes
They are colorful as a rainbow
It was dark and cloudy
Until the rain hit my body

I'm following the rainbow
I see a *** of gold at the end
I'm so afraid to keep going
What if i fall with never knowing

The embrace of gold
The warmth of success
I've destroyed myself
I can't even trust a rainbow
The colors could be a false show
Ahhh im so messed up
Hello Daisies Dec 2018
Castles and queens
Red carpet and round tables
Warm wind through a poofed dress

Oh what a mess
No matter how hard they stress
That olden times were not like the movies its meaningless

For the

Dances like Cinderella
Simpler times in a castle tower
Dragons and romance with a prince

You'll never be able to convince
that this isnt what i want ever since
I was but a young sad girl ive dreamt of my Prince

King arthur and merlin
Excalibur and the lady of the lake
Green beauty and small hobbit holes

Oh sad girl you are in woe
For happiness you'll never know
You'll always be a locked away rapunzel
Something about that dark bittersweet beauty that i love. The stories of Merlin or if castles and queens with a sad twist but with joy and deep beauty and dancing
It makes my heart feel an emotion i csnt describe an emotion I'll never truly have in my life.
Hello Daisies Sep 2018
I've been fighting this for so long
Kept telling myself it was wrong
I couldn't let it in my mind
I kept running and leaving it all behind

Today I let in
The reality i call sin
The magic i believed so strong
Is dying off after so long

I guess thats growing up
Drinking too much and throwing it up
Sadness starts to sink through
But this time I've accepted it to be true

I'm unsure if this is losing hope
Or gaining strength away from the *****
I held on to romance and stars so tight
But i awoke today realizing it isn't right

Am i letting go of my child like innocence?
Am i letting this cruel world make me repent?
Well that's just how you make it in this life
Let go of your fantasies and let in the strife

Go to work for full time and lose your personality
Because noone cares about your dreams outside of reality
I think I'm giving up running away from the truth
That my wonderland was  only for my silly youth
I wrote this while hungover, been having some feels about growing up realizing life will never be how i dreamed as a kid and the love i wished for is far out of my reach. Still scared to let go of the innocence in my heart but i have to grow up i guess someday might as well now
Hello Daisies Jul 2019
Reality breaks
Reality is fake
My heart is a pancake
Thick and crumbling
C
R
U
m
b
l
e

Afraid to feel
I can not heal
Life around me
Starts to peal
Leaving nothing but
Exposed flesh
OooozING

Lay me on the floor
It's my source of comfort
It's close to the earth
My only warmth
Keeps burying me
D
  O
    W
           N
           N
          N
            Never have I felt
  A sense of true comfort
My brain unravels
Either numb
Or sadness
Mixed with madness
Mad
     Mad
Mad    mad
Mad
Sad
It's buried so deep
Which reality is real
Can I really feel
Like I used to
Or was that a dream
Hmmmm
So it seams

I'm lost
In this dimension
Blue and gray
Swirling snow in May
Falling
Under water
Bubbling in my

Lungs

I'm too high strung
I'm too far gone
Everything feels wrong
Where do I belong
I keep singing the song
But I forgot the chorus
My brain tries to floor it
I out wore it
Now it's torn
R I P P E D to s hReDS
I'll get on my bed

And wait to be dead

Maybe then I'll find
Everything I left behind
Hello Daisies May 2019
My loneliness is crippling me
Shattered legs sinking
Into the darkest quicksand

The metronome ticking
Steady and heavily
beat ¶¶¶¶ Beat

The door closed
Only shadows consume me
My thoughts scream me to sleep

The ground where I wept
Is my favorite sleeping spot
It's warm to cuddle with

I'm just a sad *****
Crippling and falling
I'm tired of crawling

Let me lay here
Impaled with a spear
Evil spirits always near

I'll smile for the show
None of this is real
Let my skin start to peal

Someone release me
REM
REM
Everyday I tell myself I'm fine
The Night falls
I lose my mind
Its unkind the way
I twist and sway
It haunts me
It taunts me
Clawing and choking
Fire and smoking
My lungs collapse
My voice rasps
Til daylight comes
I feel numb
Repeat the same
Repeat the words
I'm okay
I'm okay
For today
Please behave
My mind
Please behave
Be kind

I set four alarms
In the night
Rem sleep gives me
Many frights
The ghost
The goblins
The treacherous
Moblins
Out to eat my flesh
Paralyze me
make me bleed
It's funny though
How they're not the worst
It's you
It's you

You come to my dreams
Like an angel of apologies
Full of heart
Full of love
Wanting forgiveness
Wanting hugs
We touch
We forgive
We laugh
We three dance with
The wind
With mighty loud grins
The past is dark
This is bright
No sadness in sight
I awaken with terror
Rem has caught me
In my most vulnerable
Gave me a plight
I cannot fight
I long for us
I long for friendship
Return to me
It's meant to be

The rem sleep lies
As I wake up to cry
Tears swallow me whole
I'm an empty bowl
Cold and alone
Sweating to the bone
Wash me away
Break my glass
Bleed from my edges
You made me sharp
And relentless
You having me
It's horrendous

Demons and ghouls
Are frightening
Yet dreaming of us
Falling in love again
It's tightening
In my chest
In my skin
It tightens my heart
Til I fall apart
You break me
The promise of peace
Of friendship
Of light and love
Of all of us
Again
Again
It'll never happen
that breaks me to pieces
More than any
Goblins or demons

You leave me bleeding
With hope
False hope
Dead hope
Tears of sorrow
Of a broken tomorrow
Stay out of me sleep
I don't wish to weep
I want one alarm
I want no harm
I want to sleep
With ease
And not bleed
Please
Please
Please
Let me sleep
So I can truly mean it when I say
I'm okay
Hello Daisies Dec 2018
Oh royalty that you are
Let me bow down before the
I doth not deserve to be in thy presence

You have made it be known
From all that you've shown
That you are a mighty one
While  i am not but dumb

Oh my king let me apologize
For i have disgraced you
My sight has tarnished your eyes

I am so low
It must show
When others see you
I must look as a ***** shoe

Thy queen is smart and wealthy
I am but a weakminded ignorant imbecile
I'm astonished I even knew of such big words

You couldn't be more right
Everything you say is so bright
Thanks for showing me
How truly pathetic i must be
A lot of people patronize me and I'm sick of it
Hello Daisies Mar 2022
I started to heal
Truly for real
Life has hit
And it's hard to deal

Beloved ones have passed
I couldn't imagine the pain
It will forever last
Inside my brain

The world around me crumbles
As I stopped stumbling
People with guns
People having to run

The world is dying
The media is crying
I don't mean to whine
It's not a good time to shine

People with bombs
I miss my mom
The world is ugly
Nobody is lucky

What's the point of healing
When everyone's stealing
Breaking, sinning and killing
Nothing is thrilling

I mourn for the world
I'm sick of the world
I mourn for my aunt
But I really just can't

Keep going like it's all ok
Just when I started to be ok
The destiny of humans
Is so grueling

Why must it be this way
What can I say
It's another sad day
It might always be this way
The world is sad and terrifying and I feel bad just being happy and healing like what's the point
Hello Daisies Feb 2019
I look at my scars
Darkend on my skin
Like spilled ink on paper

They're barely noticeable
Similiar to myself
holding deeper wounds
Only seen as an ingnifiant mark

I hate myself
Too much to be sad
Over scars from past
Im still making new ones

My body wasn't made to last
My mind made sure
So deeply insecure
I promise no-one sees

Always forgotten
Until i open a new one
What have they become
But a reminder

Im a broken window
Everyone sees right through
Tape over the whole
And ignore the shattered parts

My scars arent enough
To signify my pain
They don't scare anyone
Theyre too plain

Endless void of choking
Choking on life
Since I swallow it
No-one cares what's left inside

You may stay scars
I won't hide you
I'll just ignore you
Like everyone does me
Ive been ingored my whole life so I'll ignore my own body as well
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