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My waking eyes,
turned happiness to a glass floor.
Can you see the cracks?
I can see them.
Give me a surface from which to start
Then give it some angles
To plug in the parts

Fill it with sorrow And mundane things
To mix with the beautiful
So they wont know what to believe

Now bring in the life , as though they where clowns
And most of them will not see the world that surrounds
Beyond these wall lies the infinite cloud
The world beyond the world
The turtle on which we perch

"And its turtles all the way down"

So no tears
the shadows of the box
Is what keep us here

But a shadow is only shade
On a summer day

And one day
*it will drift away
When i feel the wind blow across the lonely empty plain,
A chilling tickle tingle on my cheeks ,
Across the great plain a vast wasteland ,
Yet sometimes it rains ,
And when it does the fields turn green ,
There is a subtlely  pleasant smell ,
It makes me think of gentle nights alone apon the plain,
In the grass i lay the night for mornings sweet revival ,
And in that time i breathe no more back to natures green embrace,
And with the wind i blow now through your hair and off your cheek.
This reality
                     our existence
          Even for all the pain and anguish
                                       And all the violence and hate
                          Is still beautiful
Take time to appreciate the flaws
                       That makes the beauty all the more marvelous
Where only here for a moment
                            *So let us live before we die
I am a strange boy,
Who nobody ever knew,
Nearly a ghost in shadow,
And talk to me they never do.
Yet as i grew i became myself,
I don't need you or anyone else.
We are all islands
Floating
We only come together
When we die
The way she flows against me
Fast and slow
To and fro
As we go
The ****** we know
The waves of ecstasy
That washes or souls
It is tender ,
It is cold ,
It is jaded ,
It is old,
It is foolish,
It is wise,
It is disguised,
It is blind,
It is kind,
It is my heart and though it is bittersweet,
it is mine.
****
As far as i can see
This can mean no good
Like love
There is a time for everything
Feel the days passing nights
Inside your hands hope blooms again
Long face lost soul
keep smiling
Perhaps the times will change
If i gave myself to you,
Do you know what you would do?
Would you turn around and gift me with you,
Or would you send me right on through,
A subtle misunderstanding,
But if you do we could be closer to understanding,
All i need is your gentle kiss,
And a taste of reality that is better than this.
Goodbye to all my good friends and pals,
goodbye to all my ladies and gal's,
We sang the tunes that have gone silent by now,
With all the laughter and the pints that we downed,
Left not but a ****** an echoing sound,
through the bones of this graveyard our bodies laid down.
.                                                                                                              .
                             Is it in this pocket or that one
                         A quick tap to tell me what I've got
                         It must be here i left it nowhere else
                   One more check and ill see where I've been
                            Not near my chair nor in the car
                   It must have fallen off the edge of the world
                                 It would have been nice
                              To have one more cigarette
                           Before the night closed in on me
It changed me
  The way I see the world
A saw the sacred scrolls
The woven numbers
Layered beneath reality
It Left me a touch of strange
a hint of madness
But greater understanding
Go home
Go home they said
As if it were a punishment
*Home is where id like to be
Home is where my heart finds me
Further down the rabbit hole,
Is where i spend my time,
To get away from all the things,
That haunt me in my mind,
My mind it seems has gone on leave,
And has left me withering,
Still i hope that it will return to me,
Yet day by day all my things get up and walk away,
My broken thoughts my shattered dreams,
It may be i am a fractured thing,
Yet still i fight to return the light ,
That the wind did **** ,
Leaving only blindness,
Blind head blind heart
My shattered parts will mend,
For when love leaves the world ,
All hearts they are left cold.
Id like just be direct,and tell you what i think,
I'm not for this being coy, and beating round the bush.
If you have an interest in me, let me know,
And if you don't well then let me go.
If you did it would make me grin,
And i might have a while to let you in,
I could get to know you, and you could do the same,
It could be greater than the sum of our parts.
But if your not that in to me and what we could be,
Just say yes or no,
And i will stay or i will go.
Let there be light
To divert the dark
Let there be love
So it will fill my heart
Let there be peace
So i may find silence
Let there be ease
So pain cannot follow
Let this be new
So i don't feel so hollow
Let there be light
And hope for tomorrow
In Life
Beautifully imperfect
Perfection only comes
*In death
I don't know what it is,
but I feel like a stranger here.
Like I was part of everything,
but now I'm only this.
That's what my body keeps trying to convince me of.
I don't fear the passing of my coil,
I've felt that death is simply a coming home.
Ever since I was a little boy.
I felt I was unconsciously part of everything.... before this,
Before I ate or drank of physical matter,
I was all the matter.
Then it shattered, and the sliver that is me...forgot. Now those memories only come with sleep,
they come and leave tears on my cheek.
I believe that's why we sleep,
to remind us we are not alone...
to remind us we are all one.
In this mortal coil...
I am entombed.
Breathing death.
Walking hollow.
    *Here today.
Gone tomorrow.
i once had a beautiful lime tree
it grew from the dirt as a little green spurt
and reached to the heavens from its place in the earth
id wind down the trail to the tree that a love
to sit in his shadow and watch as the sky turns colors above
i lean on my friend and he whispers to me
it sounds like the waves on the sea
and when night has fallen i wave to my friend and leave

Over years i wondered far from my tree
though his whispers are always with me
a leaf caught in my hair
like the thought in my mind
i haven't seen him in years

when i come apon the trail that leads from my home to my tree
the green has overgrown it and they whisper to me
i thought my friend was sleeping
but he had gone from his place in the field
what was left was a dead lime tree
One last time
i leaned against my friend and whispered to his leaves
*i have come at last to say goodbye to my lime tree
Rivers like roads,
With a sea of clouds encroaching.
Can you hear the rain?
Its coming across the plains.
*Can you hear the rain?
I don't know you
And you don't know me
Yet the moment i saw you
My heart began to sing
As if i had known you
A life or two ago
Perhaps when we die
Then we both will know
Doused
             in living fire
                                 I burnt to ash
                                                       From the ash
                                                             ­              Hope springs
                                                         ­                                        An eternal ring
Ever get the feeling that theres no point
All this pain and hardship
Is it just a long road to nowhere
So life in pain, its my life from day to day,
My mornings greet me with agony ,my evenings filled with cold wounds throbbing, yet still I wake to face the day, even though tears stream down my face, few will see them,who would care, a broken young man with the thousand mile stare.
I am a man,
In search of a woman.
Musically talented and open of heart.
Someone whom i can sing with.
All i bring is a voice sometimes toneless, but always true.
A person who brings the music nestled in their soul.
Who with the children running and screaming ,
And the flowers lilting in the yard .
Brings rhythm to the home...
Thats whats makes a home is the music that love brings .
We could sing to each other in all tones.
Of love and loss,
When the tears stream, as the smiles radiate .
From a glance only momentary malaise ,
.yet even in that darkness or voices fill the void.
The one we where born with ,
The one that in life we feared there was no escape.
Never knowIng wholeness till we found our song.
We dance.... we dance,d.
The tune we made in us
with our voice as one,
Sang light into the dark places.
Through the years
AS drops of rain and as life comes with pain
i gave you gently to the earth
With tears i sang to your earth
And left the sweet treasure that warmed you in life

Days.
            Filled with silence.
No more waking to the sound of risen voice.
Sound , sweet melody.
Days of silence...
Turned as the green of leaves to years.
No song only tears from the dreams.
Of green fields, your sweet hand grasping me,
And your lips as roses.
Sweeter melodies then ever sung.
Waking only with tear stained cheeks,
And a Feeling a diminisheing distance.
Days have passed now my cane is only a memory,
Wheels and withering legs have been reality.
No song.
Only nattering of young people that don't believe they'll die.
Sitting quietly in my cell,
Apartment to those not incarcerated.
Almost a year since those formerly screaming children showed.
Let alone i feel my darkness coming.
And for some reason all i hear is our song, your voice.
As the lights go down our song swirls into everything,
Or nothing depending your view.
I do hope that we dance in death...
As we did in Life.
He turned to me
With his creeping grin

Saying

Once gone through the looking glass
we never come back again

So you may be strange
*but we are all mad here
Inspired by aiw
I wish you would say what you mean
Instead you say nothing to me
All these ******* cracks are driving me insane
I used to be smart
I used to be strong
But these last few years
Have torn me apart
I lost who i am
Sometimes i think
That I've come to far
*To find my way home
Back go back,
To where the light was bright.
Back and back,
Where i first met the world.
Here it was here,
The magic was found,
Time in time,
The illusions died.
Mourn i mourn,
For the brilliance lost.
Lost I'm lost,
But may be found.
A hint of madness
A touch of strange
And i have lost the way
A pinch of lonely
A dash of fear
And i wonder how i came here
A lock to fit the key
To it all to everything
A key to unlock your heart
When your lost and all alone
And one that reminds you to make your way back home
There is one to lock emotions away
And one to set them free
Theres one to make me into you
And make you into me
Theres one to fill the hole in me
Thats what you had left behind
And one to fix the cracks that you can find inside my mind
Theres one that shuts out all the lights
And one to turn the day into the night
There is one that will take you to where you want to be
And one to many doors to worlds you've never seen
The funny things is that most are lost inside me
So may i find the keys inside of me
Little lost notes of pain
From a time when you where here
Before the passage of time
And your passing as well
Making me weep
Memory is such bittersweet solace
Yet thats where ill find you
So thats where ill be
Laugh through the pain
Scream with the rain
Love like the wind
*Here then gone again
Love is beautiful.
Love is hard.
Love is terrifying.
Love is comfort.
Love is pain.
Love is healing.
Love is autumn rain.
Love is sunny days.
Love is waiting to be ok.
Love is life ,
And love lasts on after death.
In the woods far from all men
There was a woman that lived in peace
With her dog and daughter made three
From time to time people would come for her help
She knew much of many things
And lived a life of light love and compassion
She was a healer
But some would say witch
And a day came that a child went missing
The villagers came to her but not for help
They decided that she used black magic to lure the child away
They burned her in autumn air at end of day
Standing elevated above on the unset pyre
Looking around as fire was kindled
She felt the lick of flames
Yet only hot for a moment then cold
Her daughter looking on as she uttered her last words
"This is what you pay to love
Im to be ash in the wind
And your to live with your sins"
She went out like a flame
Like a star winking out
the world was left darker
And a small heart left cold
~                   The moon is high
                       As children cry
              Away within their slumber
                    On mares of night
                  That bares the blight
                     Of goblins gleam
                   And wicked things
                  That creep through
                    Your cellar door
                    A creak on stairs
                  The wind out there
         Sounds like a thousand hands
                    Of darker things
             The ones you don't let in
      Are watching through the window
     With crimson grin and glowing skin
      They'll scratch upon your window
                 But Their out there
                    As your in here
                  So close your eyes
                    And bundle tight
                     For you my son
                     I say goodnight
****** I'm kinda drunk
And i don't drink
Mostly because it accentuates
My disconnection
Makes me feel even less like the norm
Even more hopeless
Reminding me every time
Why i don't drink
And beneath the mask...
There was naught but a hole,
Dark and endless
Hanging embers flickering
Then...
Then death had his way
There are other worlds than these.
We swim in many oceans,
But wash up on the same shore.
A million choices ,
And none.
~              Isn't it strange the words that we say
                         These emotions we have
                   are just masks that we've made
Map
Map
So...
when i go out.
into that sweet surrender..
let me bring my light,
onto that dark road.
I failed to understand the words you said to me,
I failed to see the love you bear a faded memory,
Day by day slowly from my heart you withdrew,
And all the things i wanted to say where lost or misconstrued,
I wish you would have told me that you where unhappy,
I wish id have recognized that you had donned a mask,
To hold from me what you really feel,
The mask was thin ,
When i saw your skin That hid beneath ,
It filled my eyes and gently the tears ran down my cheek,
I wished i had told you everything before you had to leave.
~     A life without love
 *Is akin to death without rest
Stillness...
From which all movement comes.
A sense of connectedness,
Deep in practice.
Not sleep...
But a sibling none the less.
Both a leaving,
A sense of going home.
To where we were before.
Where we ruturn.
Once our light passes the final veil.
It keeps happening
The dreams keep coming
Seeing my life
But not my life
Im not there
No tears are shed
Im cold and dead
I keep waking up...
With tears on my face
Bittersweet the dreams,
That left tears apon my cheek,
Bittersweet the memory ,
The days that passed between,
There i am I've always been ,
The lies that lie unseen,
And in the dark where lies my heart,
In lost forgotten dreams,
Of days that where yet never come again,
The lines laid down in my history,
Of what has past from present ,
I dream of them again,
Yet on waking they fled my mind,
Like sand i tried to grasp,
And all it left where tears apon my cheek.
I know it's cliché  
*But **** Monday
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