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xx Feb 2016
I can still see you in the dark
     and as I trace your silhoutte on my wall,
     you juggle your last piece of
     cigarette between your fingers--
     disregarding the heat.

I can still feel you in the wind
     with your scent that draws
     all the girls in town to you
     or even when you smell like alcohol
     and fall from your seat.

I can still write down your name
     when I thought my pens
     grew tired of bleeding for you
     and now my blank sheets will be your tomb--
     keep them marking on repeat.
xx Jan 2015
We always run
On the chain of desire
As the last person
At the end of the line
It's easy to give up
Make your run stop
No one will notice
Everyone's ahead
But we somehow stay
Though it's the hardest
To stay behind
And keep what we have
But we somehow hope
That what we're running
Is worth aiming for
xx Oct 2015
The heart --
        Can never be open
        Unless somebody
        Breaks it.
        
The love --
        Can never be true
        Unless somebody
        Makes it.

The seasons --
        Can never change
        Unless somebody
        Feels it.

These blankets --
        Can never be warm
        Unless they are
        Somebody's arms.

These words --
        Can never be relevant
        Unless they are
        For you.
xx Jan 2015
We had three warm nights
On three summer time
There were three short words
And they're your three long swords
Stabbed me three-inch deep
Inbetween my three rib bone
Got me three hours dead
From our three years of stay
I'll be just three miles away
From those three wine shop
And buy three sweet wine
To give you three joyous cheers
For the end of three long years
xx Mar 2015
Tiny grains of love
I always pick them up
Left-overs of their past
For me they're a must

Tiny grains of love
You're what I'll ever have
You're my golden dust
Something mine that'll last

Tiny grains of love
You're what I must have
Yet a precious sand
That kept slipping through my hands

Tiny grains of love
When will my glass be filled
When will I ever be drunk
When will I ever get to taste

A cup full of love
xx Mar 2015
The clouds are thin
Like a piece of silk
They keep rolling in
In a blue glass as milk
Warm and tender
Of white, yellow, and fire
With the air, they linger
As if they don't get tired
They're our fleecy goodbye
From the light in our eyes
Weightless of all
Though leaves a sullen fall
But truest promise
Lives as it leaves
We're tomorrow's fate
On horizon's brightest gate
xx Feb 2016
I wanted to tell you
the words that my
heart was saying
but I was so
caught up in the
twinkle in your eyes
and your face was
the constellation of
the brightest stars
and I fell in the
black holes that
lie in your skin
and got drowned
from so much
stardust and light.

I am so lost in
the universe that you are.
xx Jun 2015
And this is my first
Of all the people, but you
The gravity of your body
Calls me to fall from the heaven
The crashing of the sun and moon
The collision of two souls
Like attracted magnets
Of positive and negative
Bombarding each other
With nothing but pressure
Your lip did the deed
From my neck to where I
Try to gasp for some air
And I am feverish
And burning with where
Your hands walked endlessly
Time stood still
The angels are watching
I never tasted something
Sweeter than what is now
But forgive my selfishness
I need to breathe some air

*And I'll leave it all here
xx Oct 2015
"I burned the water
and boiled the pan
And I realized
I don't know
how to cook
As much as I know
how to love you"
xx Jun 2016
"We roam the cities of yesterday
every time we wake up for
tomorrow's morning
just to find out that our souls
are lost somewhere between*
*the fading sun and the rising night."
xx Jan 2015
You kept your word
And held your tongue
Manifesting a keeper
But can't hold the time
Words were frightened
Heart's a coward
Took all for granted
And you thought I'd wait
You thought I knew
With all those jokes
And bottles of wine
And said "I love you"
Few moments after
Your teardrops splattered
On my cold, hard tomb
xx Jan 2015
Falling for you is like
Falling asleep at 2am
It's all that I wanted
But my thoughts intervened
Of how it will happen
And how it will crumble
So then I'll end up
Falling for some
When 2am passed
xx Oct 2015
And I fear myself
For I am capable
Of falling for you
xx Jun 2015
I've been losing
My senses lately
I can no longer
Hear your song
See your soul
Smell your skin
Taste your kiss
And feel your love
I am losing you...
*Slowly
xx Sep 2015
"Not all sad poets
who died
are buried

Not all those
who lived
ever existed"
xx Jul 2016
When all the love is pure,
when your hope and faith is full,
when the ocean isn't pulling back,
the setting sun is yours to touch.
When lips would wake you up
and lips would bid good night--
fall as a fog into the gloomy woods
for your love knows no sun and moon.
When the storm is just a whisper
and the weather is just a news--
you are the burn and the shiver
between his pillows and sheets.
--------------------------------------------------------
­
When all of these had faded fast
*I'll remember you as my first and last.
xx Sep 2015
When I die
Throw my dried,
Pressed flowers
All over my casket
Let them lay
With me as I
Lay to rest
Let me be
With the love
I pressed on them
As I slowly
**** them while
Killing myself
Let us be
With the peace
That we had
When we died
Back when
I was 15
And wait
More years
To never be
Burried alive
xx Jan 2015
I am so imperfect
That I destruct myself
In loving you this much
While you destruct yourself
In loving her so bad
xx Oct 2015
"If loving is breathing,
I'd take you in."
xx Jul 2016
"In this wold,
we are just words.
And we need space
to be understood."
xx Mar 2016
Through the thick walls of this building,
the coldness of yesterday's promise crawls
and haunts me around in a maze of halls
where neither end nor start exists.
No holes or doors, windows and rooms
I placed myself in a game
where insanity blooms.
The days kept running and nights kept coming.
I slowly grew gray and pale
and my nourishment, drained.
I withered to dusts and became nothing
for I waited eternity to arrive
but made a visitor in me.
xx Nov 2015
"Where are your hopes and dreams?"

"It's in my heart."* I replied.

"But it's broken!" they cried.

Is it wrong to have hopes
And dreams in a broken heart?

You don't keep them anywhere
Where they would fade with the time.

You don't place them somewhere
Where they could be forgotten.

They must be safe in a place
Where they would not cease to exist
Or be passed by the hands of time.

Even if the heart, itself, is not safe.

And when your heart breaks,
*That's when they become true.
xx Jun 2015
Fire and ice met at last
With so much longing,
They gave their all
The coldness burns
And the flicker dies
Such phenomenon
Can't be permitted
As much as they want to
To touch is to stab
To love is to ****
A second of togetherness
Is the death of their will
xx Sep 2015
maybe, just maybe
if I die tonight
you'll wake up
missing my soul
and not my remains
xx Jan 2015
I am not
Strong enough
To bear the pain
That's brought upon
By loving you
Though I am
Strong enough
Knowing you are
With someone
Better
xx Feb 2016
words are being watched
and actions are being read
feelings were never expressed
and thoughts were never said
xx Aug 2015
"Scars are just like tattoos, only with a better story."
xx Oct 2015
My heart is not a product
to be rejected by you
just because
its seal is broken
xx Mar 2015
You never let these tears
To flow fearlessly from me
And made me believe
That rain is for the weakest
That the sunshine up above
Is what should be inside
And so I never got the chance
To know what rainbow is
xx Mar 2015
And I know stories
Of midnight love
That used to fall
From dusk 'till dawn
But let the sun
Come up and burn
We bear the love
Worth burning for
But how I wish
We fought for it
We should've lived
Love worth living for
xx May 2015
'Cause my ashes flew somewhere else
Where lost people go
I tried running and hiding
Away from the stares
The judgement of the minds
In an irrational trial
I am held guilty of being me
I am a sinner
'Cause I am broken
Left to chase my ashes
Bounded with endless bars
And cliffs as roads
I am sorry
*For being different
xx Oct 2015
You can't just say you love her
In the wind
Say it in her mouth
And taste her answer
As her words dance on you tongue
And the wind can never take that...

away
xx Feb 2016
it was never too dark
but never too bright
'cause the moon came shining
when I needed your sun
xx Jun 2015
Sing to me like one of your girls
I'll find your beat even if they can't be heard
Into your rhythm, I can be wringed
I'll take it all up to the ones I can
I'll dance and dance until I lose my feet
I'll just look at you until I lose my sight
I'll let the fire burning until it loses its heat
I'll keep you in my heart until it loses its beat
xx Mar 2015
It was always the "good night"
That makes you leave
Impatient for the sun
To come and for you to see
How it steals your darkness
From those eyes of yours
But you always keep it closed
And walk the road alone
xx Jan 2015
The cheer never made me
Feel so alive
The sun never made me
Feel so bright
The laughters never made me
Feel the fun
The heat never made me
Feel the warmth
All I am is what you were
When I was into you
xx Aug 2015
My vision is broken
My heart is impaired
I trusted my senses
And met my catastrophe
What I did was not just
A mere suicide
I walked to my coffin
And loved you to *death
xx Jan 2016
the night is deep
though you're not yet asleep
and the air outside our window
can't bring you under our sheets

I held your hand and kissed you
all the way to your ear
to slowly confesss
what my heart wants to tell

"I would never bother to go
outside and look for the stars
'cause I see the universe
in your eyes..."

"you are the brightest star
in the constellation
of people..."

"you are my star..."

you smiled and slowly,
started caressing my hair
like turning the pages
of your favorite book
and went closer for my ear
and whispered,

"you're my universe
and what you saw
was your reflection..."

"I see you as my home..."

"and that's where the
*brightest star belongs..."
xx Oct 2015
I traced circles on your palms
And infinity in your heart
I drew my love on your skin
And made you taste it on me
The time ran on us
The earth is shaking
Heaven's up above
But it's hell down here
We soared the night
With our eyes closed
With the lights turned off
We bathed in moonlight
Of warmth, sweat, and darkness
But you were uncertain
To sketch on me as well
xx Apr 2015
Wounds* speak more
Of pain than words can do
No matter how
I cover them, they always
Scream
Can you not hear it?
xx Jan 2015
Falling for you is like
Falling to the bathroom floor
Foolish and clumsy I was
Slippery and painful it was
But I learned my lesson
And won't fall for you again
xx Jan 2015
Was it really even good
To breakdown and cry?
To let those tears fall
While you're falling apart
And falling hard for the wrong one?
Maybe it was even really me
Who kept on clinging
Who kept on keeping the ones
Who won't even stay as I thought
When I hoped that they would
But it's a saying
To make those you love to stay
Such a bluff I became blind of
And it's just an act
It has never been enough
And at the end of the day
You'll crawl back to yourself
Realizing you missed yourself so much
Even though you haven't known
Yourself that much
Became obsessed more
With the bitterness in the dark
Forgetting all the lessons
Forgetting the love
Love that should've grown
Inside of yourself
But got it killed beforehand
xx Jan 2015
The wind moved past my face
I am on a bench on my favorite place
In my shirt and PJs and barefooted
My breath flew and the river's frosted
I was caught by a girl with her teddy
To ask me a question sounding so silly
"Aren't you feeling cold miss?"
I looked at her innocent eyes
And I said "No I'm not..."
"It's my heart that's cold"
She was so curious and unsatified
As a young one she asked me "Why?"
She won't understand but I'll tell somehow
"It's the weather so keep yourself warm..."
xx Oct 2015
And now you like simple girls
When I already combed my hair
Like the way your former girls do

When I already painted my lips
Like how the roses would bloom
In rows in the fields

When I already dressed myself
With how the pretty girls do

When I already turned into something
Your senses have been looking for

"I like simple girls"
And I never got the irony
Turned myself into someone I don't know
Because now, right in this moment

*You like simple girls...

— The End —