Get up,
Eat.
Go out,
Eat.
Come home,
Eat.
**Repeat

I thought you could see through my disguise
See through the charade of everyday
I thought you were different
From the others
The ones who tell me to
Get up
Get moving
Or get out of the way.
While everyone else was herding past,
You offered me your hand
You were the first to tell me
I was worth it.
But that was your game,
Your play.
I wasn't special, not to you.
You led me along
And I enjoyed the ride,
Not realizing that it made me
Just like the
Rest of them.

If you could possibly count
the number of stars that spatter
themselves across the nighttime sky,
perhaps then you might know
the number of days
I'd like to spend with you. 

Tell me, would you mind very much
if I asked you to share tomorrow
with me, and each and every
tomorrow after that?

One dull summer evening,
I look up
and I see it
A big bob of cob-web,
lumped into that shape
Hanging from a fine thread,
like an upside down snake

It sways around,
responding to my fan
Stereotypical Indian music plays in my head,
and I stop looking up at all

Right below, coffee I sip
And it descends on me,
the thought -
What are the odds,
that into my coffee,
the snake will take a dip?

Low, for sure,
but maybe I can help
I turn on the fan speed,
and start drinking there more often

One day I come back,
from a hot sultry day errand,
the ones you just can't avoid
I sit down with my cold water
and realize,
long before I look up,
that the snake has gone
No more head bobbing around,
no more of Satan's spies looking down
I look around, and down on the floor
lies he
Just a film of dust now,
acknowledging the fan,  
fluttering mildly

I guess for my coffee now
I will have to find,
a new hope
of an equally rich finish
Till then, just hazelnut, chocolate
or maybe something a little Irish

I left my home and the feeling cannot be described
I left everything I have ever known for this completely unpredictable adventure
Being an international student is a wonderful struggle

I can't do this anymore.

HELP!                                                        I'm falling apart on the floor.

Sleeping has become my only score.

I've can't even cry.
                                                                      Must be strong for the poor.

I'm okay on the outside.
                                                                   I'm crashing down in the core.

Tell me "It's okay."
                                                          Let me blindly love tomorrow's day.

I want to speak,
                                                  but sometimes, there's nothing left to say.

I want to smile..
                                                    ..but no..
                                                                                               I'm not okay.
I'll never admit it.
                                                                                      I fall apart everyday.

I was heading to "Out The Window",
                                                                        but hit a *** hole on the way.

Am I even trying?
         Why am I always lying-
                                                ..on this floor..
begging,
pleading,
stressing,
for more than I have the courage                                        ..to ask for?..