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32.8k · Jun 2014
FAT
StuKerr Jun 2014
FAT
Icecream makes me fat,
I really like to eat cake,
I ate my parents.
8.8k · Jun 2014
Eye contact
StuKerr Jun 2014
Please never do that
Now I'm getting quite nervous
Your bites aggressive
7.9k · Jun 2014
Muscular
StuKerr Jun 2014
Gym ****** eyes me
I've lifted more than I should
I banged him later
7.0k · Jun 2014
Fashion Police
StuKerr Jun 2014
Fashionista Queen
She wears all the best labels
Too bad she's a *****
6.5k · Jun 2014
Drunk Haiku
StuKerr Jun 2014
Alcohol my life
Blur it and let me be free
Inhibitions melt
3.9k · Jun 2014
Ba-dum-tis
StuKerr Jun 2014
Smooth and supple skin
Exhausted arms droop, sweat beads
You can beat my drum
3.1k · Jun 2014
Powder Blue
StuKerr Jun 2014
Powder blue adam
Won't somebody **** me please
I miss the nineties
3.0k · Jun 2014
Hai-ku-na-ma-ta-ta 1
StuKerr Jun 2014
King of the lions
Hai-ku-na-ma-ta-ta
Simba, what a *****.
2.9k · Jun 2014
Nooner
StuKerr Jun 2014
Afternoon delight
Sun still up its bright outside
But dark here with you
2.8k · Jun 2014
Spicy
StuKerr Jun 2014
Dark thoughts run through me
Like a curry burning me
Open the window
2.7k · Jun 2014
Angst
StuKerr Jun 2014
Angst angst angst angst angst;
Angsty Angsty angst;
******* people, ****.
2.6k · Jun 2014
Friendly
StuKerr Jun 2014
Amanda manly
Strong chin, slight fuzz, bit of bulge
A man duh lady?
2.6k · Jun 2014
Dirty
StuKerr Jun 2014
Talk ***** to me
You should probably shower
I ruined the mood

Talk ***** to me
Dust is mostly human skin
Mood ruined again
2.4k · Jun 2014
Hai-ku-na-ma-ta-ta 2
StuKerr Jun 2014
Ow, Its in the past
Hai-ku-na-ma-ta-ta
Learn from Ra-fi-ki
2.2k · Jun 2014
Personification 2
StuKerr Jun 2014
Steve the ocelot
Works at the supermarket
But can't reach high shelves
1.9k · Jun 2014
Spiral
StuKerr Jun 2014
Im out of my mind
Drugs and drink anything goes
I have **** my pants
1.8k · Jun 2014
Vision
StuKerr Jun 2014
Despairing eyes stare
The returning gaze hateful
Dead eyes gaze blankly
1.8k · Jun 2014
Espresso
StuKerr Jun 2014
Coffee salvation
Caffeinated ambrosia
Beloved Barista
1.6k · Jun 2014
Hashtag haiku
StuKerr Jun 2014
Depression heartbreak
Lovelife sad death lost you pain
Hashtags are poetry
1.6k · Jun 2014
Personification
StuKerr Jun 2014
Humanisation
Might as well jam a mans face
On an Ocelot

Personify it
Happy like Humanity
Ocelot the bloke
1.5k · Jun 2014
anchorman haiku
StuKerr Jun 2014
That Ron Burgandy
He's so misogynistic
Baxter is Awesome
1.4k · Jun 2014
Simpsonian
StuKerr Jun 2014
Yvan eht nioj
Boy bands, even cartoon ones
Obvious evil
1.4k · Mar 2015
Gyps
StuKerr Mar 2015
Ruptured urethra
She has worn it to a nub
My filthy *** fiend
1.2k · Jun 2014
Intrude
StuKerr Jun 2014
Your ideas pervade
I feel quite violated
Keep it to yourself
1.1k · Jun 2014
Bulge
StuKerr Jun 2014
Drinking gone too far
Drunk fat girl you complete me
Wake up. That's a man
963 · Jun 2014
Fashionista
StuKerr Jun 2014
She left me for him
He's a big ageing baby
His diaper is chic
Chic baby diaper shithaiku ageing young love
886 · Jun 2014
Proustian Dawn
StuKerr Jun 2014
Glistening blackness flows before me and slowly the tinge of dawns burning light begins to run across my vision.

The still gentle waters begin to glow at the horizon, dazzling through the spectrum of light.

The sky awash with umber and azure conceals the glittering majesty of infinite.

As light passes the darkness recedes creeping out of sight.

The shadows lengthen then begin to darken as in contrast the warm rich brightness envelops me.

At once a ray bursts from the edge between azure and umber and they are swallowed by the white.

I gaze out onto the ocean. Its glimmering majesty losing the sparkling wonder of the night above.

Blinding it sears across the sky and hesitates at the edge of my vision before fading, a memory of bright.

The glorious halo of white fire reaches above the limit of the edge of the world and the day begins anew.
798 · Jun 2014
Eat my Feelings
StuKerr Jun 2014
Food makes me happy
Sunshine makes me very glad
I like murdering
771 · Jun 2014
Ouch
StuKerr Jun 2014
Tequila ruins me
Vomitted on a bouncer
Emergency room.
764 · Jun 2014
Why?
StuKerr Jun 2014
Why do I love you?
You break me and build me up
How do I know why?
StuKerr Jun 2014
The dimmed lights, shadows flow over soft silk skin
A gasp, white teeth are bared in happy grin
Bed sheets tangled mess, Slip to the dark floor
Eyes glow smouldering, lock through the dark. More.
Speed builds slowly, relaxed and unhurried.
Eyes widen, teeth bare, nails gouge deeply buried.
Hair tangled now, caught in hands, wound round.
Gasps, and low throaty whispers consume sound.
Iambic good times
531 · Jun 2014
Ipanema
StuKerr Jun 2014
Love Ipanema
That girl loves to walk so much
Where is she going
519 · Jun 2014
Ageing
StuKerr Jun 2014
What is a haiku?
Alzheimer's makes me forget
What is a haiku?
476 · Jun 2014
Theory
StuKerr Jun 2014
Why does my love life
Exist theoretically
Life is misery
460 · Jun 2014
Johnny
StuKerr Jun 2014
Johnny Cash is great
I shot a man in Reno
Cant beat that **** right?

— The End —